OH MY GOD IS THIS MY FIRST POST THAT'S NOT A REBLOG?!?!?!
yes gamers, your zaddy alpha Deejay posted something in this grand day..... i felt like actually making my blog. a blog. woah! that's . that's crazy!
anyways in this fine day i stopped being sick. woah! i was sick?!?? yes sigmas, i was indeed sick 😔🥀 we pull thru like incels being adamant staying insecure
BUT ASIDE FROMTHAT I WANTED TO SHOUT INTO THE VOID ABOUT "And Another Lovely Day"! IT'S MY FAVORITE COMIC!!!! IM SO EXCITES!!!! GENUINELTLY!!!!
it's a webtoon meticulously crafted with pure love and cutieful art. it's currently on CANVAS (canvas is like. solo posted comics on webtoon, i dont think they get paid or anything?) but it's in the process of becoming a Webtoon Original!!! think an animated pilot getting greenlit by glitch but instead it's a comic lol (for those who dont know)
anyways! i've already said in one of my reblog tags that it's basically about the aroace experience. ofc it doesnt only focus on that, it's got some cute side stuff like an actual romance happening between two other characters lmao. there's also some cute bonus/filler chapters that r basically qna tid bits!
so far it's got 39 episodes, minus the bonus ones! it's a small read! could be read within a couple hours in full, maybe more depending on reading speed
um. okay. the meat of this post. yes. in all of those chapters that i've read, it touches upon amatonormativity, and the main characters' feelings and reactions to the social expectation of finding a romantic partner. I'm not sure if you [alloromantic/allosexual] guys notice such pressures in everyday life? i dont want to assume but i absolutely love talking in depth about social structures, pressures, and how people can be affected by them! so i shall speak like you dont lol
anyways anywayd anyways. our two main characters, nora and elliot only represent two types of a similar kind of aroace.
Nora; She's the one who's romantic+sex averse. She doesn't outwardly express her aversion to her social circle, or anyone else who aren't family members.
Elliot; He's also romance+sex averse, but it's more accurate to say he's repulsed. He doesn't completely hide his distaste for romance+sex, but he does mask it over with a cold attitude.
Nora is an extroverted socialite, while Elliot is an introvert loner but garners favor for his good looks.
One thing I absolutely love about AALD is that it doesn't say outright that its MCs are aroace until halfway into the story. I love that it's subtle, and that the MCs themselves bother to hide their identities from others. Something about that feels absolutely real and grounded. Relatable, even. There's this unspoken assumption in everyday life I tend to experience myself; that if I ever say I'm aroace or any other such, I'll only get questions and my identity won't be taken seriously even if it is "accepted."
This unspoken social assumption seeps into all kinds of communities, even in ones that are supposed to be accepting. I'm talking about the LGBTQIA+ community here, lol. I don't want to make the bold claim that aro and ace identities are thrown to the wayside by fellow queers, as I haven't interacted past small down-low social circles in work, and tight-nit friend groups. I've never been to gay or trans bars! I can't say 100% for sure, but I have been hearing about, and experiencing the subtle... aphobia, I suppose? (Only outside of my close friend groups. Work and regular life tend to throw all kinds of ppl at u!)
Going back to the comic, these experiences shown in the comic kinda hit me like a truck lmao. It solidifies the slow, petty-feeling oppression because other people around you don't know you're aro or ace, or both. I think AALD does a lovely job conveying the dread and the uncomfortable feelings of being at the recieving end of someone else's romantic/sexual feelings. Not only that, but also being afraid of being left behind by friends once they get a partner.
Nora's perspective focuses on her feeling troubled by her friends' interest in her love life (or lack thereof lol). She struggles coming out to her social circle. Not only does she struggle coming out, she has a hard time speaking up for herself whenever she's uncomfortable [when it comes to romantic assumptions or situations]. She's the pacified people-pleaser who wants to remain by her friends.
And then there's Elliot. His perspective focuses on his discomfort to being the object of many folks' affection. He isolated himself because of his deeply negative experiences that may or may not have traumatised him in some way lolol. He's a pretty-faced loner and uses his cold exterior to push people away from any sort of romantic situation.
Both are two sides of the same coin imo. The comic itself doesn't seem to explore other aroace identities so far! It does worry me just a little bit, but it's wtv. it is much simpler to focus on completely aroace characters and explore those issues from there lol. it does seem to capture a lot of what i've felt and thought anyway
i loved feeling the frustration i felt when both Elliott and Nora were shipped together by their peers. it was SO cathartic to see those romance tropes get tossed aside in a singular scene both parties were present in. It took place in a get-together party, congratulating Nora's author friend Glacier for having a successful talk (lecture? presentation? something) in the school both Nora and Elliott teach at. The party was held in the house of Nora's sister.
Elliott excused himself to the bathroom, wanting to recharge his social battery. Nora herself was speaking to her old friend group outside of a bathroom somewhere in the basement. Her friends all cheered for Nora, saying "Congrats on the boyfriend!" and "We were getting worried about you. It's like, finally, right? All of us have been waiting for you."
And then after that Elliott and Nora's sister-in-law enter the scene, dissipating the romantic misunderstandings. And I just. AAGGHH!!! The wind up! The tension! The sadness and disappointment! Nora's friends ended up apologizing to her for potentially "making things weird for you and Elliott." Yes, Nora ends up not coming out to her friends even in that kind of situation where they ran with the idea she's dating somebody without hearing her out lol.
idk. i dont think i delved too deep into the comic and the issues it explores, but that's okay. i don't think i need to. i'm content with naming them and getting some thoughts outta my system. Ever since reading it, I've felt more secure in my identity. It felt like home reading about two aroace characters' problems with being understood. Who would've thought that representation actually matters, LMAO? 😭
erm long post! it should be very obvious how important this stupid fucking comic (/affectionate) means to me to even bother making a post. let alone a long one! 😭
im gonna go drink tea and eat food and like. shit or something. thanks for coming to my ted talk! infodump?! yeah!!!!! byeeeeeeeeeee 🙏🙏😫😫😫😫😫🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 im so tired dawg