{ 𝑨𝒓𝒅𝒆𝒏 . }

ARDEN SONG. TRAINEE DOCTOR. 28 YEARS OLD.

[cherysh]

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When the more you love, the more you lose The more I'm there for you

[insporp]

[x]

[hyungsikgifs]

i’ve forgot how to breathe.

[abbey-forbes-blog]

“You aren’t looking so hot,” Abbey looked over at them, taking a bite of her salad. “You sure you don’t want to just go back to your place and rest?”

[ardensong]

A smile lingered, but it was a touch feeble. “Thank you for that confidence boost. Just what I needed.” Arden poured lukewarm coffee into a mug, and turned to press his aching back against the cabinet. “Doesn’t mean that I’m not tempted to crawl in a supply closet and sleep the rest of my break away, though.”

[ardensong]

scarxbrooks‌:

Scarlett took a look at the other guy’s retreating form, letting out a little huff of annoyance, before her eyes returned to Arden as he spoke. “Oh, he was just inviting any girl he could find up to a bed that probably wasn’t his and not acceptin’ that everythin’ about him is repulsive. So basically bein’ a typical frat boy.” She gave him an even brighter smile than before, as if to reassure him that she was okay, even though she was a little shook up. “I’m alright.–Sorry that I just kind of did that.” Scarlett referred to the fact that she called him her boyfriend. “I just went with the first thought that came in my head. I’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable.” She had always been a naturally impulsive person and while circumstances like these wasn’t common, it was typical for her to get her friends into some sticky situations. 

Honestly, her desire to stay at the party had all but faded and while she did want to show him a great night out, she was sure that Arden would understand. “You know what I think would be better than this party that has way too many sweaty people.” Her nose crinkled up at the thought. “I think we should just pick up some drinks for ourselves and go back to my place. Next time, we’ll just go out to a normal dance club.”

His anger began to fade as the intruder blended into the crowds. Arden was never one for confrontation, preferring to mediate, but the ordeal had him second guessing his moral inclinations. Arden felt a touch guilty that it had happened because he wasn’t there--he had left an opening, one in which the boy took no qualms in filling. What would have happened if he had been longer? He didn’t wish to think about it. And now, his change in temperament had ruined the evening, and he came to this conclusion when Scarlett suggested a change of scenery.

Arden attempted a smile, but it was STRAINED. He couldn’t imagine that she would want to remain after that, but he uttered his apologies regardless of this. “I’m sorry, this was meant to be fun.” Arden had actually been looking forward to the escapade, despite not knowing where they were going. “I feel like I’ve ruined it. But we can go somewhere else,” The night was meant to be as much as a reprieve for Scarlett as it was to Arden. “Did you want to pick up something greasy to eat on the way? Because in all honesty, that may have been what I was excited for the most.”

[ardensong]

saysaeran·:

Saeran could hardly keep their tired eyes from fluttering closed as the man’s fingers brushed his hair away, the exhaustion that always gripped his small body was always so hard for him to fight. “Don’t have to leave, though.” Saeran mumbled, their lower lip jutting out for only a moment before they forced their eyes open once again. Arden still didn’t seem real, both in that moment and in general. It seemed the man who was always coming to Saeran’s aid was too good to be true. How could someone be so kind and gentle to someone like Saeran? Someone who had never given them a reason to stay around?

His tin fingers gripped lightly at the man’s jeans. “We’re friends. Friends don’t let friends hurt alone.” He said simply.

Saeran didn’t want Arden to leave. It seemed that in their time together the smaller of the two had grown attached. They had grown protective. And even more than that, they had allowed Arden to see parts of himself that he reserved for the hard nights that he spent alone. The tears that came with being invalidated. The rage that came with being beaten. Arden had seen too much, and Saeran didn’t want them to leave because of it.

The birds that sang outside told Arden that he should leave, or rather, that he had to. Arden hadn’t meant to sleep as long as he had, but evidently, he needed it. He usually had trouble sleeping in new, unfamiliar places, but drowsiness still weighed down his eyelids. He couldn’t pinpoint what sort of exhaustion it was, perhaps a mixture of all three—physical, mental and emotional. And so, Arden’s eyes were lazy as they focused on Saeran, their gases clashing as Saeran’s lips formed a small pout. He had been ready to leave (half buttoned shirt aside), and hadn’t expected such a statement. “I’ve slept through the night, Saeran...” Arden thought that they may be as embarrassed as he was about the whole ordeal, but this doesn’t seem to be the case.

Arden’s eyes dropped to where Saeran held onto his jeans, as if attempting to anchor him to the bed. Arden may have thought this to be inappropriate if it were not for the words that followed. They made Arden’s chest ache—Saeran considered him a friend. For a while, Arden felt as if he was being a hindrance, imposing himself onto Saeran in a way that might be deemed overpowering. But he just always WORRIED. Arden swallowed, a little thickly, as his fingers come to Saeran’s wrist. It wasn’t a gesture that would dismiss the other, but rather one that may provide comfort. Arden could feel Saeran’s pulse thumping against the delicate skin, and his grip flexed for a moment before he let go. Saeran wasn’t a fan of being touched, so he didn’t linger.

Arden wasn’t sure who needed who at this point, but the words were firm—Saeran didn’t want him to leave. Arden shifted, moving so that his back was to the headboard and his feet on the bed. He supposed he could wait a while and fulfil the request. Arden breathed in deeply, before exhaling a wearied sigh. “I could stay a little while longer,” Arden glanced down towards his companion. “So go back to sleep. I won’t leave before you wake up, I promise.”

A part of Arden would dread to sit in the darkness whilst his friend slept soundly, recounting the events of the day prior. Another part wished to talk about it, but... it would be hard.

[firefightermaverick-deactivated]

“I-” Maverick cut off as his back straightened and head lifted, more alert. He gave a few distinct sniffs, before his eyes met the other’s. “Do you smell smoke?”

[ardensong]

Arden’s mouth had been open, ready to respond, before falling shut. Concern lined his features, and as if he were a mirror image, Arden too paused to sniff at the air. “Uh,” His brows furrowed as he concentrated. “I don’t, at least, I don’t think I do. But I suppose you’re more attuned to it than I.” Arden’s hand rested on the arm of the chair, as if he were about to get to his feet. “Should we go see where it’s coming from?”

[ardensong]

what's one thing you would tell 15 year old you?

“That things can, and will, get better.”

[ardensong]

[ardensong]

ardensong‌:

REUBEN & KIHYUN.

[ardensong]

saysaeran·:

A scowl jerked over made up features as the man laughed in front of him. Had he not been feeling so worn out, maybe he would have punched him. Maybe.

“Did you expect me to go out and buy something? That’s really problematic of you, you know. Assuming that I have any sort of extra funding to afford a Halloween costume is just your doctor privilege showing, Arden. You and I are in entirely different tax brackets and you should be ashamed of yourself—what if I was a child and this was the best I could do? Would you withhold candy from me then?” Saeran spoke with a sort of drawl that was saved for only the times when he was being particularly playful, like when Salem wanted to jump across the furniture, or when he teased people who were just terrible at games on the internet. A smile pulled at his lips.

The smaller of the two took a couple of steps forward, letting one hand rest on the man’s shoulder as he stood on the tips of his toes. A gloved hand reached for the bowl of candy, small fingers scraping just at the bottom. “God damn you—give me the candy you overgrown monster.” He whined. Saeran was far too distracted to note just how close the two of their bodies were, how their chests touched and Saeran was all but clinging to the other for balance in his pursuit of candy.

Arden rolled his eyes at the dramatics. Months earlier, he would not have dared to do such a thing—he would tread on eggshells around the other, being careful and thinking precisely about what he was going to say. This however, was not a primary concern anymore. “You have an answer for everything, you know that, right?” He’d grown to become desensitised to the quips, recognising the particular tones in which they spoke, and gathered that Saeran was teasing him in their own quirky way. It was hidden behind a serious expression, a scowl, but Arden knew that it was there. It served to do nothing but further his amusement—Saeran was scrappy, and it was times like this when Arden was exposed to it. Another laugh escaped as Saeran stepped forward, movements set with the intention of taking the bowl from his hands.

Arden remained where he stood, watching Saeran with an eyebrow raised as their fingertips ghosted along the bowl. He could have prolonged it, teased them by lifting it higher, but the sound of what was most likely a neighbours’ footsteps sounding from down the hall caused Arden to halt. Their current position may have looked suspicious to an onlooker, as Saeran was pressed rather close against him. He’d noticed that Saeran didn’t have much trouble touching others, and it was something that made him curious. Arden often refrained from touching Saeran, which was often a difficult feat. He was the type to bat a hand against someone if they said something funny, ·or to pat a shoulder when sympathy called for it. Arden eventually let the bowl descend, letting Saeran have what they wanted. “I’m not overgrown, you’re just small.” Arden’s smile widened, and he took a step back into his apartment.

"Come inside for a little bit. You must be cold.” Arden wasn’t going to take no for an answer. His apartment was homely, the electronic fire was lit and Mallory’s recent bakes sat above their kitchen diner. Most importantly, it was warm.

[ardensong]

ARDEN SONG.

SOCIAL MEDIA | [1/?]

[ardensong]

scarxbrooks‌:

As she sat there with her nose crinkled up and annoyance written on every feature of her face, she honestly regretted this decision. On a different night, while she probably still wouldn’t have enjoyed his advances, Scarlett might have been flattered by the attention, but with her thoughts solely on showing Arden a good time, the last thing she wanted was this. Scarlett looked around, searching for some kind of escape. It wasn’t as if she was stuck in her spot, but she felt as though simply moving away wouldn’t fix her issue and besides she might get lost in the crowd. “–So what do you say? Wanna go upstairs and have a little fun?” Her attention was brought back to the guy, who moved even closer by now, his breath hitting her skin. She fixed her eyes in a glare at him, deciding that it would be best to move. “I have a boyfriend.” Scarlett blurted out, thinking that would be the best excuse to use since it worked plenty of times before, but as she got up from her spot, the man’s hand grabbed her wrist and held her in her place. “He doesn’t have to know.” As he continued to speak, Scarlett felt anger more than fear at the moment, but she tried her best to stay calm and just as she prepared herself to say something, a hand was placed on her shoulder. 

As she looked up, a feeling of relief washed over her as she saw Arden and without thinking, she instantly smiled. “Yeah, babe. Everythin’ is okay.” She let the affectionate name slip from her lips, hoping that he would just play along and ask questions later. The grip of the other man’s hand loosened on her wrist and she took the opportunity to stand up. “I was just talkin’ about you.” Scarlett leaned up and gave Arden a kiss on his cheek. “I guess he does have to know, huh.” She directed towards the drunk college student, who scoffed under his breath and said a ‘whatever’ before he got up and staggered away. “Sorry. I had to do that. He wasn’t takin’ any kind of hints.”

Arden grew agitated quickly, the situation not sitting right with him at all. How long had he even been gone for such a thing to happen? He was not one for confrontation, nor was he a fan of straying outside of his familiar role of playing mediator. But Arden felt the stirrings of anger at the pit of his gut, his brows furrowing with irritation. It was the way the man had all but cornered Scarlett that annoyed him the most, his demeanour and the slope of his body blatantly obvious in his intentions. Arden did not like it in the slightest.

He had been eyeing the slackening grip on her wrist as Scarlett spoke, showering him with smiles that were confusing. Was she not aware of the situation at hand? His gaze flickered between Scarlett and the student, that dawning of realisation not quite sinking in amidst the rising of his temper. “What about?” He enquired just before her lips pressed against his cheek.

Only THEN did he understand what she was doing. Still, the sheer surprise of it made him flush, and for a moment that seemed to last a lifetime, Arden was floundering. “That’s okay, I understand.” He noticed that the other had since slipped away. “What did he say to you? Are you alright?”

[kangseuqi]

♡

[littleladymarisol]

Marisol was having a hard time. She had been spending a lot of her time running from class to volunteering and back to class. Maybe she was just exhausted, but for some reason her emotions had been triggered when she saw a set of girls walking around the grocery store together. One holding a small pumpkin but keeping their hands linked. For some reason the image had done her in. She managed to find a less crowded isle near the dish soaps. She tried to remain composed but small sobs slipped past her. 

She looked beside her at the person who was witnessing her meltdown. “S-sorry, I-I-I’m s-so sorry,” she said embarrassingly brushing away her tears. She wished she could run away or at the very least hide her face, but too many people were around. She felt so embarrassed. 

[ardensong]

Arden’s hand hung suspended in the air as he reached towards the shelf. The stifled sobs that sounded were the reason behind him freezing, and wide eyes turned to be met with a girl shielding her face as she cried. Arden’s mouth hung open, blatantly SURPRISED at the sight, what had devastated her so much to warrant such a public display of sadness?

His fingers grasped the sponges that he reached for, doing this blindly as his eyes didn’t leave the girl. “That’s okay,” He responded, his tone quiet but laced with confusion. Arden took a tentative step towards her, his head tilted to the side. He patted at his pockets. “I don’t have anything...” He eyed a box of Kleenex on the shelf opposite, wasting no time in opening the box and offering it to her. Arden could just pay for it after she had calmed down somewhat. 

[ardensong]

saysaeran·:

Saeran didn’t dream— they tended to be far too light of a sleeper to actually fully slip away from the world around them. They slept often as it was a nice escape, but it was never enough to completely let their mind rest. Nothing ever put their head at ease. They weren’t certain when they’d stopped dreaming, there was always the vague memory of waking up from particularly gruesome nightmares or losing themselves in desperately wanting another second with the likes of Jay Park and some other idol they had spent their teen years obsessing over. At this point in their lives, though, they tended to jerk awake at even the smallest of noises, small eyes fluttering opened and lips pursing in annoyance. Tonight, however, Saeran woke to the feeling of Salem moving to rest in the crook of their neck and shoulder as the blanket was rested over their small frame. Their lids felt far too heavy to look for the source of the disturbance, lips only parting just slightly to allow a small sigh to escape. Their concept of time didn’t exist yet, all that they had processed was that they had been cold and now they were very warm. Thin fingers reached to ruffle the cats dark fur as they turned their face into the animals warm coat.

How much time had passed since they felt the body next to theirs move? Their eyes finally opened, just barely as the little bit of light that trickled into the room through the curtains was too much for the reclusive twenty-year-old. Eyes finally rested on the man changing in their room, scanning slowly up their back as the shirts were switched. Had Saeran been more awake they would have found themselves more than a little flustered and quickly turning to cover their face and pretend to still be fast asleep, but the exhaustion that riddled their petite body hadn’t picked up on the idea that maybe they shouldn’t be watching Arden change. “Are you leaving?” Saeran asked, their voice soft. It was a different tone than what they generally used. This one held a note of innocence that was generally locked tightly behind the fortress they’d built up so high up around themselves. A small hand moved up to rub at the bleary eyes, attempting to wake up just enough to verbalize that they wanted the man to stay.

They looked small— hair curling at the ends from heat damage, eyes softer than they usually allowed themselves to be, features only a bit swollen from sleep, mouth set in something very close to a pout though it was unintentional— and they wanted nothing more than to pull the other back into bed so that they wouldn’t ever have to think about the other crying alone in a hallway ever again.

Arden was their friend.

Had it been Hoseok, or Jay, or anyone else that they allowed into the small world that they lived in, they would have done the same. Their hands moved across the sheets, fingers outstretched towards the other. “You shouldn’t be alone.”

Teeth toyed with chapped lips as fingers moved deftly to button up the shirt. Arden’s mind was elsewhere, to the extent that his movements were almost robotic. He continued to blink into the empty space until the rustling of sheets sounded, the sound of a body shifting. Waking. Arden had hoped that he had been quiet enough as to not rouse his sleeping friend, but alas, he was unsuccessful. For reasons that were entirely SELFISH, Arden hoped to be out of Saeran’s hair as soon as possible. It embarrassed him that he had subjected them to witnessing his little breakdown, as it was so out of character for him. With the benefit of hindsight (and sleep), Arden knew that his reaction was warranted given the situation, but old habits died hard. His hair was a mess from where he had sat on the lid of Saeran’s toilet, as his fingers had been dragged through the strands roughly. Coupled with the sleep lines that marked the sides of his face from where he had slept, Arden didn’t feel his best at that moment in time. His eyes were still rimmed with red and his lids were heavy with the aftermath of what he had endured. Arden wished that he had slept longer, but he was scared of falling victim to the dream again. His throat bobbed as he swallowed, jaw turning to press against his shoulder as he glanced at Saeran. Arden’s stomach jolted to find that Saerans’ eyes were already on him, and his fingers immediately halted. He felt a little ashamed that he had been caught in the act. It was as if he were escaping after a one night stand, but this was somehow much worse.“I, um…” Sleep was still prominent in Saeran’s features, and he hated that they had awoken. Not because it meant that Arden’s attempt to leave had been foiled, but because it meant that the peace had been disturbed. Arden had never seen Saeran like that, the twist to their mouth smooth and slack, apples of their cheeks glowing with the faint blush generated by the cold that swept through the apartment. But their face didn’t change too much from what they looked like when they slept—Saeran’s features still looked lazy, heavy with the residue of slumber. Arden supposed that counted for something. “I was going to, yes. I didn’t want to wake you.” Arden stood, eyes falling to where the hand lay outstretched before him. The quiet padding of bare feet sounded across the floor as he approached, lowering to perch on the side of the bed. The side where he had slept, the pillows skewed from where he had shifted fitfully. Arden blinked at Saeran, the tenderness in their voice such a contrast to the sharp, cutting tones to which he was subjected to when they first met. Perhaps Arden had judged Saeran too soon, as he had no idea that this… lay beneath all of that. “I won’t be alone,” Arden reached to brush back the stray strands that hung over Saeran’s eyes, the movement so fleeting it was as if it didn’t happen. “You’ve made that very clear.” In the quiet of the room, the silence broken only by the birds that sung from outside, Arden cleared his throat. “I just had a nightmare, that’s all. I figured I’d call you when you woke up, to say thank you. But I guess I don’t have to do that now, so… thank you, Saeran. I mean it.”

[ardensong]

celine-szalai·:

Looking over at him, she took a deep breath. “Szalai. It’s Polish. And then my first name is Celine, but people like to say Celina instead of just plain Celine.”

“It’s very pretty,” He responded, as if it were any consolation for his ignorance. “I bet I sound like one of your students, right? I’m sorry about that.”

[ardensong]

saysaeran·:

As eyes had fluttered open that morning, Saeran knew that Halloween was going to be far more taxing this year than the years passed. The small mint haired person felt that heavy weight that sat on their chest that told them that things would just be much better if they never left their bed at all. If they just stayed quiet. For a while it had worked, that was until Salem began to whine loudly at her owner for her breakfast. The was the first thing to pull the artist from the thick blankets—they couldn’t let their pet suffer just because they couldn’t seem to pull themselves together. There had been days where they absolutely had just shut his cat out, allowing her to run amuck in their home while they lie in bed, feeling less and less like a person by the moment. The next thing that drew them out of bed was that they had promised to take Hoseok candy. Yes, it’d initially been a joke and their friend would never blatantly ask for anything but… Saeran did love him. What was a Halloween without the free candy?

So, with all of that in mind, the petite twenty-year-old dressed themselves. Tight black jeans. A sweater. Gloves with thick black and purple stripes across them to cover the worst of the burns that had begun to litter their hands as their seasonal depression began to wear them down. Another change in the seasons and though things were good Saeran still couldn’t seem to find the happiness they knew that they were supposed to be feeling. A white sheet was pulled over their head when they came to the last reasons front door, the only thing lending to their identity was the heavily made-up eyes that peered through the holes in the thin material. The day had gone by smoothly; so far there were no catastrophes in sight that might have been a good enough reason to stay in bed and ignore the holiday altogether (no matter how much Saeran did genuinely enjoy it). A small hand pushed from beneath the oh, so fitting costume to knock on the door.

 They didn’t know Arden well enough to know if their friend actually enjoyed the Holidays or if they, much like Saeran, spent them inside. 

What if he wasn’t even home? 

It made sense. Arden was attractive. He was a doctor. He was smart. Of course, he would be out at a party. It was also getting to be a bit late in the afternoon for visitors if Arden had opted to stay home and what if— The door pulled open before them and suddenly Saeran was very glad that they were wearing a sheet over their face because they knew for certain that the anxiety and stress that built within them was painted across the surface.

 “No,” Saeran replied, the anxiety suddenly flipping to another emotion that was growing to be more and more frequent when they were around Arden—one that made their face run hot and their hands cold. 

“Trick or treat.” They said in their most innocent tone, though the way the other was gazing at them made them falter. A sigh.

They flipped the sheet back to rest along their slender shoulders, one hand quickly reaching up to tame the green flyaways that the younger of the two felt shifting atop their head. Saeran had put a lot of effort into the way their face looked, despite the unassuming nature of the rest of them. No matter how pretty their makeup may have been-how the dark eyeshadow mixed near expertly with the red made their eyes seem all that more intense- Saeran didn’t feel good. That’s why they were wrapped up in a sheet, after all. “Give me candy, I wore a costume. That’s like, sort of the deal, isn’t it? You’re a doctor, you’re all about rules and shit.”

Arden wasn’t sure what he found funnier—the fact that the person beneath the sheet was indeed Saeran, or that their tone had done a complete one-eighty upon being discovered. In fact, he had found it so amusing that the hand free of candy came to rest on his stomach as he laughed. “’And shit’?” The laughter slowed, morphing into quiet chuckles. “Is this really the best you could do? You’re meant to SCARE me.” Arden’s index finger lifted to wipe at the stray tear that threatened to cascade along his cheek. The doctor could only wonder how many other homes they had hit whilst wearing this ridiculous costume. He let out yet another laugh, envisioning Saeran trundling along down the busy New York city streets. They were certainly one of a kind. “I am in no way giving you candy after you swore at me.” To drive the point home, the bowl was lifted out of their reach. “Plus, it’s for the CHILDREN...and those with good costumes.” Arden was teasing, this obvious in the way he spoke and how the corners of his eyes crinkled. He knew that he’d end up giving the other what they wanted in the end, as the night was already drawing to a close. Trick or treaters (those that were of the right age, at least) were fast approaching their bedtimes, and so he would be left with sweets that would lay uneaten and stale in his cupboards until the next Halloween rolled around.In all honesty, Arden was just relieved that Saeran had shown up. He was incredibly bored, to the point that he had reread the page he was on several times as it just simply wasn’t registering. His mind was wandering, worrying, and so it was taking everything he had not to start pacing his living room. But alas, came a distraction. The frequent visitations had continued since the night that Arden had broken down on the stairwell, resulting in the night spent in Saeran’s bed. For a while, Arden almost wanted to avoid walking up those steps again, to face Saeran on the other end. But he feared that if he were to actively avoid them, it would make him a COWARD.                “So,” He grinned, arm still well above his head. “What’s the magic word?”