đá â. ă*  âŰŞÂ ââĄă this is the 'you are amazing' award! send it to 10 other bloggers you think are wonderful or just take a moment to bask in your own awesomeness !! â¸( Ë âż Ë )â¸
love you always, angel! <333
doll u always know how to make me blushđĽšđĽš thank u cutie
đá â. ă*  âŰŞÂ ââĄă this is the 'you are amazing' award! send it to 10 other bloggers you think are wonderful or just take a moment to bask in your own awesomeness !! â¸( Ë âż Ë )â¸
WAIITT I NEED TO ASK have you ever read the premium content series before becaus its like one of my first fics on the platform and it was so goodđťđťđđđ
hi my goat i saw that u liked 2 of my posts and i lowkey started screaming bc ur one of the first blogs i followed when i made this account and i eat up all of your worksđšđšâď¸âď¸ lowkey honouredđđđ
Omg yes that smau was so good yo it had me drooling ngl.. wait i wanna become moots bc you are too cute đ im abt to eat up whatever u drop now btw
I read that jakehoon "sharing is caring" fanfic over 10 times and I even sent it to my friend omg pls pls pls I NEEDDDDD more I need something similarđđđ
Im so glad you loved omggg hehe, I need to write something similar (two members x reader) soon bc im craving it. Any ideas?
what does making progress heeseung think of toy story 5 coming out!!
He literally won't stop talking about it. In fact, he watched the trailer at least 10+ times just to analyze every detail about it, then took his thoughts about what was going to happen to twitter and got into multiple arguments with people who think its overrated. He's very passionate about it and even bought a toy story themed calendar and is counting down the days until it's released in theaters.
i have the blurriest eyes known to man which is unfortunate because i love reading long fics, the only reason why i still uses my phone and have tumblr installed is your writing. otherwise my dry eyes stay reading ao3 on my kindle. inshallah someday tumblr will be available on ereaders and we can highlight the smuts. thank you so much for giving us these LONG beautiful pieces for free ma i wish we could at least pay for your coffee. if you wanna visit thailand id have an entire resort reserved just for you. id bring you to my place in chiang mai where i goon to your writings on a daily basis
you're so funny omg this made me laugh đ I am very flattered and thankful right now, I might have to take you up on that and we can get coffee together maybe hehe
im so done i have this one exam tomorrow ive js given up like im done goodbye im here to say my goodbyes ill miss you and your jake fics theyre so yummy ok actually byeđđđđ
Hi cutie! You better come back here rn, and i hope your exam went well! seriously come back here. no like seriously or else I wont write this jake fic I have planned in my head.
hi baby𼚠im doing well! trying to come on here more often even though lifeâs been busy recently, i missed u too and im gonna try and be more active (aka slide into ur inbox bc ur adorbs)
You pride yourself upon being perfect, whether its your grades, your hair, your outfit, but most of allâyour reputation. so what happens when a single bad grade tilts you off that perfect axis? or rather, the boy introduced into your life because of it..
é 寚 ŕż . . lee heeseung đ đť!reader
â content warnings: college au , smut , slight angst , nerd! heeseung , he is into gaming-hes also working on his own game , hes obsessed with toy story (as we know) , hes absolutely pathetic , awkward moments , overthinking , reader is prideful and a little manipulative , corruption kink (ish??) , mentions of drinking (smoking in like one scene), jealousy issues , reader can be mean sometimes , heeseung is a sweetheart but a little gullible â§ inexperienced hee , hand jobs , big dick hee (nerds are packing) , kinda sub hee , lowkey bulge kink , unprotected sex, pussy eating , face sitting (weâre bringing the freak out) , fingering , overstimulation , heeseung can stay hard after cumming multiple times , featuring: hyung line, sunoo, yunjin , let me know if i missed anything !
â word count: 28.7k (yeahâŚ)
Lee Heeseung was a nerd.
He wasn't unattractive by any means, justâŚoverlooked. Didn't even fully grow into his features until his Senior year of high school. But before that, he was a full on loser, still is honestly.
He was the type of guy who stayed up until 3am coding just because he felt like it. Who had a specific shelf just for Marvel comics, and a separate one for DC, along with an area specifically for his character figure collection. All lined up in his room of the apartment he shared with his bestfriend, Jakeâwho also shared similar interests, except he tends to be more..normal about it.Â
You on the other hand were the complete opposite. Gorgeous, like actually striking. You were popular, at least according to Heeseung you had a âshit ton of friendsâ he doesn't even know how you remember the names of that many people. Â
But the first time Heeseung met you was the first day of classes in fall semester, Econ to be exact. Your low rise jeans paired with a fitted long sleeve. Hair styled perfectly, yet you made it seem effortless. You tend to do that actually, act completely normal without knowing how much of an effect you have on the people around you.Â
He had both of his earbuds in, like alwaysâscrolling mindlessly through a twitter thread that was debating on whether League of Legends was a good game or not, spoiler alert it is. Anyone else who differs can argue with the wall.Â
âIs anyone sitting here?â You had asked, when he didn't answer the first time you tapped his shoulder once. He remembers the moment his eyes landed on your face vividly, because fuckâyou were pretty.Â
âIs anyone sitting here?â You repeat, already half annoyed with the fact that this was one of the three seats left in the lecture hall, and you weren't sitting in the front. He looks down at the seat next to him, âOh noâ I mean yes, well not anymoreâ so no, You can sit, not like I'm forcing you or anything. But uh, it's not taken.â
You nod slowly âUm, Okay..â Before sitting down, your light pink bag hanging from your chair. He now has both of his earbuds out, phone clutched in his handâ because no way was he letting you see that he scrolls through twitter threads for fun.
You look over at him, the way he's sitting up perfectly in his chair, fingers twisting the wire of his earbuds. âDo you always do that?â You ask, eyes trailing along the side of his face. Observing the slope of his nose. âDo..what?â He asks, thankful his voice didn't crack.Â
âTalk like your brain is still loading.â He lets out a laugh, âPretty much everyday.â He says, watching your face for a reaction. You smile, it's smallâbut he notices it.
He lets out a breath when the professor enters, half relieved, but also half annoyed that he canât delve deeper into conversation with a pretty girl like you. Even if it is only by convenience.Â
You don't miss the looks, you never do. His gaze shifting from the professor discussing things from the syllabus, to youâa literal goddess sitting next to him, as he would say.Â
You caught him once, but he thought he was smooth with the quick way he averted his eyes. After that first class he cursed himself for being so damn obviousâ God, you probably think he's some perverted freak. Yet you still sat beside him the next day, and the day after thatâ actually for the rest of the semester.
You didn't talk to him unless it was necessary, like asking him if he wrote down a slide of notes you missed, or that one time you dropped your pen on the ground just under his chair.Â
He remembers having to bend down slightly, face nearly in your lap just to pick it up. Forcing himself not to look at your bare legs before handing it back to you.
Your casual smile and âThanksâ before acting completely normal again, like you didn't just make his insides to a full 360 from just a smileâ no teeth either!Â
When that class ended just before winter break, he couldn't help how disappointed he was. What do you mean he wouldn't be able to see your face anymore?âor smell your vanilla perfume every time you shifted in your seat!
He remembers Jakes roll of his eyes having to hear him talk about what a tragedy it was. âDudeâ it's not like you wonât see her again, remember you still go to the same university?â Yeah you attend the same school, but the closest he ever got to you was sitting next to you in that class. Other than thatâyou wouldn't even look his way.Â
â...earth to Heeseung?â Jake's voice cuts through his train of thought, and his line of sight as his eyes stray away from you, laughing and talking with your friends at a table outside. Jake looks back, spotting you through the window of the campus dining haul. âSeriously dude?â Jake sighs, running a hand through his hair.Â
âWhat were you saying?â Heeseung asks, taking another bite of his food. âI was saying that I finished episode six of that anime you put me onâ man that fight scene was actually crazy, I literallyââ He watches Heeseung's eyes stray away from him, landing on you again for like the 10th time in the last 20 minutes.
âAlright there's something seriously wrong with youâ Jake saysâor more like interrupts. âWhat? I'm fine.â Heeseung claims defensively, âNoâ you've been staring in the same direction for the past 20 minutes like a creep. I'm honestly surprised she hasn't felt you looking at her this whole time.â Jake states, âI was not staring at her like a creepââ
âNo you definitely were.âÂ
âWhatever dude, it's not like sheâd notice anyway.â Heeseung pokes at his food with the plastic fork. âYeah, she's too busy being Miss. Perfect..â Jake exaggerates. âShe really is perfect, isn't she..â Heeseung says, glancing over at you once again.
Little did they know that was far from the truth, yeah you made sure you at least looked good, but your grades were faltering. Specifically in Physicsâ and especially with your annoying ass professor.Â
âShe literally called on me in the middle of class today, I couldnât even think of an answer which made me look even more stupid than guessing.â You groan, careful not to wipe at the mascara on your eyes. âThat's Professor Kim for you.â Yunjin says, taking one of your fruits from your tray. âIt was pretty embarrassing.. But the âIt's so obviousâ comment from her wasnât necessary.â Sunoo adds with a face.Â
âOh and it gets worse.â You say, looking at the both of them. âYou know how she made me stay after class right?â You look at Sunoo who nods, âYeah, well she full on printed a paper for me to turn into the tutoring center, stating everything I'm struggling with and told me that I was going to need to find help as soon as possible or I was going to fail her class.â You finish in one breath,Â
âSo, youâre going to have to get a tutor then..â Yunjin clarifies warily, looking down at the paper you place on the table.
âYeah because apparently my performance in her class is "Concerning" and she even said I was lucky to have this opportunity! You knowâ I would never hit someone but God her face was really slappable in that momentââÂ
Sunoo interrupts before you can go any further, reading off the list of things âDifficulty with free body diagrams, inconsistent use of formulas, lack of problem-solving structure..Damn, she really has it out for you.â He says, putting the paper down.
âI mean half the time she rambles on like she knows something, and her equations all blend together anyway!â You groan in frustration, both Sunoo and Yunjin looking at each other. âI mean.. Maybe tutoring wouldn't be so bad..â Yunjin suggests, sipping her water. âJust give it a chance, it really canât hurt y/n.â Sunoo adds, âIt hurts my ego, my prideâ hell, even my reputation.â You snatch the paper back, shoving it in your bag.
âNot everyone is perfect, including you babe.â Yunjin says, trying to be reassuring. âNo, but I need to be.â You frown, standing up. âWhere are you goingââ Sunoo starts
âTurning in this damn tutoring paper to the library. I need to get this over with, like nowâbefore I change my mind.âÂ
And that's exactly what you did, handing the paper to the woman at the front desk, âYouâll get a message sent when weâve found your tutor, along with a time and date.â She says, typing on her comically large computer. âWait, I don't get to choose the day?â You ask, twisting the ring on your finger.Â
She looks up at that âNo, since it's the tutors time you're using.â She says, looking back downâ you almost open your mouth to say something like âMy time is just as valuable.â But ultimately decide not to, before smiling and walking away.Â
â
âHeâs on meâFuck!â Heeseung yells into his headset, watching as his video game character dies yet again.
âJake, dude im literally going to lose my rankâwhat the fuck man.â He says, ripping off his headset, not wanting to hear the excuses his best friend has to give for playing like shit, even if he is right down the hall.Â
Heeseung nearly presses the power off button on his monitor before a notification pops up, the loud sound overpowering the faint background music of the video game lobby.Â
Gmail: Tutoring Lab Information
Fuckâ he had forgotten all about that, signing up to tutor for some extra credits. There goes at least a few hours of trying to level up his rank on League.
He runs a hand through his already messy hair before clicking the notification to expand it. Reading through it quicklyâ âWe are aware youâve gotten a 90 or higher in this classâblah blah blahâ good choice okay whatever..â Heeseung stills as his eyes land on the next few words.
Selected Student: Y/n L/n
âNo fucking way.â He rubs his eyes onceâtwice, just to make sure he's not seeing things. Then he laughs, disbelieving, because this has to be a typo, there's no actual way you need tutoring.
He scrolls back up in the emailâ ah, Professor Kim, Physics. Now that makes sense. He scrolls down again, just to re-read your name plastered in bold on his screen. And better yet, your phone number, right underneath it.
He could fall to his knees right now, seriouslyâThanking the universe for this spectacular moment. Almost immediately he picks up his phone, fumbling over the disorganized appsâmostly just games, before finding messages. Typing your number in the add on box, he pausesâ how the hell does he even go about this.Â
âHey, I know I stared at you all of econ last semester and it was probably totally obvious, oh and also, I still do because it's kind of hard to look away. So now I'm tutoring youâoh and I have a massive crush on you too that makes me feel like a pathetic middle schooler.âÂ
Yeah absolutely not.
You pick up your phone, drying your wet hair with your towel but pause when the notification slides down at the top.Â
Maybe: Lee Heeseung: Hey, I saw that you needed a tutor for Physics. The tutoring lab assigned me to you, does Thursday at 4:00 work for you?
Great, they weren't kidding about how it's on their schedule. But that nameâLee Heeseung. Where do you know it from.. You open the message, typing out a bland reply.
You: Yeah that's fine.
Lee Heeseung: Great, ill see you there
Heeseung re-reads over the message he sent multiple times, maybe he's over thinking it but you sound upset. Itâs just words on a screen and he's no empath, so maybe he's just overthinking right? Haha, right?
âBroâobviously sheâs going to be fucking pissed, she literally prides herself upon being perfect. But honestly if it's Professor Kim and her Physics lessons on top of that, I understand why she needs it.â Jake says, handing Heeseung's phone back to him. âI honestly don't even know how you got a 96 in that class either.â He adds.Â
âBut still, isnât the universe kind of on my side with this? I mean out of all peopleâ she gets assigned to me.â Heeseung says, looking at the messages one more time. âI dunnoâ man, all I have to say is donât do that weird staring thing.â Jake says, standing up.
âWhat weird staring thing?â He asks, genuinely confused. âThe one where you try to undress someone mentally and physically with your eyes.â Jake states like it's obvious
âI donât even do thatâ?â Heeseung says defensively, leaning against his gaming chair. âYeah alright, just whatever youâre planning, donât be weird about it.â Jake mutters before walking out of his room, shutting the door behind him.
âI wasn't even going to do anything weird..â Heeseung mumbles under his breath.Â
-
âWaitâyou said Lee Heeseung?â Sunoo asks, leaning over your phone to get a closer look. âUhâ yeah?â you eye him, turning to Yunjin who looks just as confused.
âHeâs literally in my Computer science class, and donât you remember he was in your econ one last semester?â He adds, raising a brow.
âWaitâ the guy who stared at her all the time right?â Yunjin sits up straight, âYeah, the guy with the nice nose.â Sunoo clarifies, watching the realization dawn.
âNoâwait no, this isn't goodâno, no, no. Because in that class I acted like some know it all, which I mean it was easy but now I'm going to him for tutoring.â You snatch your phone from Sunoo
âHe probably thinks im some likeâposer!â Sunoo and Yunjin watch you, âWho cares what he thinksâwhat are you doing?â Yunjin looks down at your phone âI'm cancelling."Â
âNo the fuck youâre not.â Sunoo says, taking your phone back. âYou know what will happen to your perfect grades if you fail?â He asks, already knowing the answer. âExactly, plus this guy is smart as hell, trust me.â He sets your phone back down on the table. âJust go y/n, what's the worst that could happen?â Yunjin adds.
Oh, I donât know, maybe heâll mansplain everything to me just like every other guy at this university tries toâor worse, make me feel like a complete and utter idiot.
But yet here you are anyway, denim shorts with a fitted top in all your glory since of course, today decided to be the day the cold weather breaks.
You really could be tanning right now, the smell of sunscreen filling your senses, but instead youâre hit with the scent of dry erase markers and stress.
The library door shuts behind you, a few students scattered around, you make your way up to the second floor where the study sessions are held, so it's not as quiet.Â
âOhâheyâ he says, looking up at youâmaybe trying to stop himself from staring too hard. You shouldn't even be surprised heâs already here, considering he was somehow always earlier than you for Econ last semester.Â
You look down at the table he's seated at, notebook already open, pencil spinning between his fingers like he can't keep his hands still for more than five seconds. You hesitate for a second before walking over, âYouâre early.â You say, looking at him.
âYouâre late.â He says, you check the time on your phone. âItâs 3:58..?â You look down at his outfit, some random graphic tee, with jeans.
âAnd you were always five minutes early for Econ last semester, so itâs late for you.â He states like it's a fact. âDo you just want me to leave?â You cross your arms, annoyed already. âWhatâno, sorry. I justâhi.â His Adam's apple visibly bobs up and down as the words spill out. â..Hi.âÂ
You set your bag on the table, taking the seat next to himâcompletely normal for a tutoring session. Obviously you pull out your notebook with your failed attempts in copying down Professor Kim's problems from the board.
He doesn't miss the way you act like youâve done this before, knowing very well you haven't. Mainly because youâre always too stubborn to ask for help.
He tries to ignore the vanilla smell radiating from you. âSo, what are we struggling with then?â You exhale, already done with this. âPretty much everything according to my professor.â He chuckles and you shoot him a glare.
âSorryâI'm not laughing at you, itâs justâ I know how professor Kim gets so I understand.â He clarifies quickly. âBut let's try narrowing it down?â He suggests, âFine.âÂ
âOkay, show me what you were doing on the last assignment.â You flip your light pink notebook open to the most recent page of what looks like scribbles before facing it towards him. He leans in, shoulder nearly touching yours.Â
His hair looks softâŚ..Why are you thinking about his hair.
He scans the page from top to bottom, really lookingâ not trying to judge, but trying to understand, his eyebrows furrowing slightly. âHm, Alright.â He says, looking at you. âI see what the problem is.âÂ
You sit up straighter, âIs it that bad?â You ask warily, âNoââ He says quickly, reassuringly âItâs not, itâs just the set up.â
You cross your arms over your chest, âThe whole page is the set up.â You state defensively.
âNot really,â He runs a hand through his hair, âYouâre just starting the wrong way.â He reaches for your pencilâ
âMay I?â You nod, handing it to him. His fingers brushing yours in the process. He tries to ignore how that made him feel. That small singular touch of your fingerâ God, maybe he is a loser.
âOkay, let's start simple.â He says, drawing a wonky looking box. You tilt your head, âA box?â you ask curiously. âIn physics, everything is a box.â He says casually, you let out a huff of a laugh despite the situation.Â
He glances up, eyes falling to your mouth briefly before turning back to the page. He swallows once again. âNow the way Professor Kim does it, she assumes everyone just gets itâ but I would say to not start with an equation.â
He goes on, looking at you once to make sure youâre paying attention. And you are, because you really do need this.
âThese arrowsââ he says, attempting to draw some âAre the forces acting on it.â You nod, âSo.. I would draw this every time instead.â You ask, trying to understand. He nods, âYup. It pretty much tells you what's happening before you try to solve it.âÂ
âNo oneâs ever really explained it that way..â you mutter under your breath, âLike I said, she thinks everyone just automatically understands the bsâ she writes on the board.â He shrugs
âYeah well, some of us don't." He leans back, watching you look over the page. âHey, thatâs why weâre here y/n.â You turn to look at him, eyes roaming over his face in the way a pretty girl like you can, no questions asked.Â
âOkay then,â You lean closer, âDo another one.â His eyebrows lift slightly at that âBossy.â He notes outloud, âGet used to it,â You say with a smile, he huffs out a breath of amusement before flipping onto the next page, setting up another problemâleaning over a bit closer than necessary, but you donât pull back.
-
âOkay soâŚwhatâ you were flirting with him?â Sunoo asks, laying against the headboard of your bed.
âI mean, not like âI want you so badâ flirting but kind of..?â You bite your lip in thought, holding another outfit up to your body, earning two head shakes from both Sunoo and Yunjin.Â
âHe gets nervous so quickly, it's kind of cute.â You say, roaming through your closet. âI said he was a good teacher and his ears got all redâ You try not to laugh at the memory.Â
âSo, do you like him or something..?â Yunjin asks, scrolling on her phone. âWhatâ no. I mean heâs like fun to tease and stuff.â You chuckle awkwardly, toying with the hem of a black halter top.
Sunoo raises a brow at that, âIs this one of your superior complex things, except this time it's the loser-nerd who's never felt the touch of a woman?âÂ
You throw the top in his direction âSunoo!â Yunjin laughs, sitting up. âItâs justânone of the guys here actually like show it. You know what I mean? They try to be all nonchalant and stuff, but Heeseungâ I donât know, he's different.â You say, sitting on the bed beside Sunoo.Â
âSo like heâs an ego booster then?â you shoot Yunjin a glare âWell noâI just like how different his attention feels.â You murmur, picking up the halter top beside Sunoo and holding it up to you. The nod from both of them brings a smile to your face.
âJust be careful y/n.â Sunoo looks at you, âWhat? Is he one of those undercover playboys or somethingââ You say through a laugh
âNoâGod, definitely not. Itâs just.. you donât always realize the effect you have on people, and I donât think heâd take it lightly..â You let out a quiet laugh, âCome on, he doesn't like me that much.â You say before standing up to find a skirt that would work perfectly with your top. You ignore the âRight..â that leaves his lips.
You were far from wrong thoughâbecause no, he likes you even more. Probably too much for yesterday evening being the first time heâs actually had a full conversation with you, even if it was for school.
âI mean that has to be flirting right?â Heeseung asks, completely distracted from the code he's almost done completing for this class. âIsnât flirting like her second language though?â Jake questions, cursing under his breath when his code doesn't run smoothly.Â
âWhatâno, right? She doesn't flirt with everyone.â Heeseung says, trying to convince Jake, or maybe even himself. âI dunnoâ dude she has one of those personalities.âÂ
âAre you saying I'm reading into it too much?â Heeseung asks, fingers fidgeting with the string of his hoodie. âI just never see girls like that actually going for wellâ you know..â Jake starts âWhat? Guys like me?â Heeseung finishes, running a hand through his already messy hair. Jake opens his mouth to speak again but closes itââHey, Heeseung?â The feminine voice cutting through there conversation, drawing both of their attention.
âOh hey, what's up Clair?â He says casually, âAre you guys doing anything tonight?â She asks, biting her lip nervously, âShitâ we have that league ranked thingââ Jake kicks his foot under the desk,
âNo! Weâre not!â Jake says cheerfully, practically beaming, earning a side eye from Heeseung.Â
âOhâ Okay, cool.. Well there's this party, apparently everyone's going. Are you guys gonna be there?â she asks, specifically looking at Heeseung âI don't really do partiesââÂ
âOw!â Heeseung seethes when Jake kicks his leg again. âYeah, we'll be there!â Jake says through a smile
âOkay, I can text you guys the details!â She gives a small wave before walking back to her seat on the far end of the class. âWhat the fuck dude?â Heeseung whisper-yells.Â
âSee now that was flirting, and do you even remember the last time you went to a partyâ let alone got invited to one by a girl.â Jake says through a hushed whisper âYeah and there's a reason I haven't been to one since.â Heeseung replies through the same tone.Â
Jake tries not to laugh at the memory, âYeah well, plus Clair is totally hot, and she was definitely making âfuck meâ eyes at you.â Jake shrugs, leaning back in the uncomfortably hard computer lab chair.Â
âThose definitely werent âfuck meâ eyes, and I only have eyes for one girl anyway.â Heeseung says proudly. âWhatever, we're still going.â Jake says, focusing back on his code.
Heeseung chuckles before doing the same, knowing damn well he's going to end up playing League in his room for hours on endâjust like every other night where he doesn't have a shit ton of work to do.
âIm still not goingââ Heeseung says, rolling his eyes as Jake walks into his room and flops on the edge of his bed.
âDudeâ come on. Youâve quite literally been in your room every free chance you get.â He sits up, âI mean, how can you expect a girl like y/n to actually like you when all you do is rot in that fucking gaming chair?â
Heeseung side eyes him before continuing to scroll on his phoneâ âI really donât care, frankly those frat parties aren't even enjoyable unless youâre drunkânevermind weâre going.âÂ
Jake opens his mouth to make a point but closes it when he realizes what words just came out. âWait, what?âÂ
âI said weâre going.â Heeseung says, looking down at your instagram story where youâre very much going to said party.
He turns the phone to Jake with a smirk on his face. âI mean you said it yourself, she wonât want someone who rots in a gaming chair right?âÂ
âOkay but what the hell are you even going to say to her? Oh hey itâs me your tutor, yeah just came here to stare at you the whole time with club soda in my solo cup.â Jake mocks, standing up.
âNo, I'm actually going to talk to her. I did kind of fine when we were at the library, what could even go wrong?â Heeseung shrugs, slipping on his converse.Â
âWell first of all, youâre not wearing a fucking toy story 2 shirt.â Jake says, looking down at his outfit.
âWhat's wrong with Toy story 2?â Heeseung mumbles, âI know for a fact that itâs not getting you any pussy.â Jake says, standing up and tossing him some jeans and a red band shirt instead.
âWhat would you know about getting pussy?â Heeseung says through a laugh. âDefinently more than you.â
Heeseung raises a brow at that âAre you saying youâve been getting some?â Jake holds back a laugh, âJust put the damn clothes on.â He chuckles before walking out.Â
-
The second he walks in the smell of alcohol, sweat mixed with sweet perfume and probably smoke hits his senses.
The speakers blaring some overrated rap song too loud. It's not surprising that the place is packed either. He already regrets coming. âNopeâthis was definitely a mistake.â Jake laughs âDude you literally insisted on us going.â
Heeseung runs a hand through his hair, which was sort of styled a few minutes prior. âI changed my mind, it's not worth it.â Jake smirks, âYou weren't saying that when you saw her post.âÂ
He doesn't respond, instead letting his eyes scan the roomâ until they land on you. Black halter top, probably too short jean skirt, laughing, talkingâ smiling at the people around you like they're actually worth your time.
You look like you belong here, âYeah.. youâre definitely not talking to her.â Jake says, pulling him from his thoughts, âI am.â He raises a brow, âYouâre going to overthink it and want to leave.â Jake says, eyeing him.
Heeseung lets out a breath, scanning the surfaces around him before picking up a drink. âLiquid courage, right?â He smiles weakly before downing the contents inside of it, immediately regretting it with the burn that travels down his throat, he grimaces before drinking the rest, letting it settle.Â
âWell damn.â Jake says, grabbing a drink for himself. âIt's fine, everything is fineâ I can talk to her, I mean look how sheâs talking to everyone elseââ before he can continue over thinking, he starts walking towards the end of the house youâre at, he's barely across whenâÂ
âHeeseung, You came!â He stops, Clair, standing right in front of him, smiling like sheâs actually happy to see him. âYeahââ He says, âI honestly didn't think you were going to, you seemed like you were gonna say no.â she laughs.Â
âI was justâ considering it.â Heeseung says quickly, âMmm, well I'm glad you came.â She smiles, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. Stepping closer into his personal bubble, like this is normal. âAre you having fun?â He looks around, eyes landing on you for a split second, mid laugh. Godâ youâre so pretty when you laugh.
âYeah, it's uhâgreat.â Jake chokes out a laugh behind him, a smile spreads across Clairâs face âYou donât have to lieâ He sighs âIm tryingâÂ
âYou donât have to, you can just hang out with me. Iâll make it better.â She says easily, Heeseung glances at you one more time before looking down at Clair, âYeahâthat would help.â He admits, rubbing the back of his neck.
And that's when you spot him, freezing mid conversation with a few guys, leaning into Sunoo. âIs that who I fucking think it is?â His eyes follow yours to exactly who youâre looking at.Â
Lee Heeseung, at a party. âHow much did I drinkââ Sunoo says, looking at the cup in his hand. âI thought he was one of those losers who never even left the house?â You whisper to Sunoo, âYeah I thought so tooââ Your eyes trail down the girl talking to him, her body language clearly indicating she has some sort of attraction to him.Â
âDo you even know that girl?â You ask Sunoo who shakes his head. You down the rest of your drink before setting it down on some random side table. âUmâwhat do you think youâre doing?â He asks, looking you up and down. âImâŚsaying hi.â You smile sweetly. Bullshit.
He sighs, âI canât stop you.â You fix your hair in the mirror behind him quickly before confidently making your way over.
âWow.â You say, the girl's eyes land on you, Heeseung turns to look at you. First thing his eyes land on is your face, lips, and just for a split second, your chestâwhich you donât miss. Your expression isn't easy to decipher, âWho knew Lee Heeseung was a party person.âÂ
âI'm notââ He replies quickly, âOh, really?â You look behind him at the girl. âCouldâve fooled me.â She smiles politely âHi, Im ClairââÂ
âYeah, hi.â You say, already focused back on him. âI didn't know you came to things like this.â You look him up and down, he swallows underneath your stare
âI meanâI don't usually.â Jake tries to hold a laugh at the interaction he's watching from a few feet away. âMade an exception though, right?âÂ
Yeah it was actually, you.
But the way you say itâ there's something underneath your tone. Maybe he's reading into it too much like he does with everything else. âYeah,â He says slowly, your eyes fall on this Clair girl again, then back to himâ making it known you were looking just to see the nervous look on his face.
He has no clue why he's even nervous. Actually that's a lie, itâs completely your fault he's like this. âAre you having fun then?â You step closer, friendlyâbut there's something else in your eyes.
Maybe it's the alcohol, whatever he drank out of that cup is probably making him see things..right? âI just got here.â You hum in response, unconvinced.Â
The girl beside him decides to open her mouth, voice annoyingly high. âWe were justââ You cut her off âOh, I'm sure you were.â You donât bother looking at her, eyes trained on the boy before you instead. Would it be wrong to say youâre enjoying this?
He swallows, Adams' apple visibly bobbing, â..am I doing something wrong?â He asks, genuinely. You laugh, almost surprised at the question âNo, why do you think that?â You tilt your head, doing that thing that usually makes guys swoon. âBecause youâreââ He stops himself, looking back at Clair âNever mind.âÂ
You watch him for a second longer, the way he shifts on his feet like your stare affects him too much. You smileâ that sweet, almost performative one. âHave fun,â You say before turning and walking away, leaving him confused, and definitely even more curious.Â
Jake comes up beside him, clapping him on the shoulder âOkay, so that was actually fucking insane.â He says through a chuckle â..shut up.â Heeseung mutters. âShe was so jealous.â Jake smirks, âShe was notââ Heeseung starts.
âShe definitely was, and youâre blind if you donât see itâwhich you should considering your obsession with her.â Heeseung looks past his shoulder in the direction you walked in.
âIâll be right backâ Jake grabs his arm âUh noâ youâre not about to leave the girl who very clearly likes you.â He says, nodding towards Clair who's now talking to one of her friends. Heeseung pulls his arm away âI'm not leaving anyone.â Jake sighs âYou kinda are.âÂ
âI justâ I need to talk to her.â Heeseung bites his lip in thought, Jake pauses before a small grin spreads on his face
âYeah, that's what I thought.â Before he can say anything else, Heeseung is already moving after you. Not even sure whatâs going to come outâ but he needs to know what the actual fuck just happened.
âY/nââ You turn, trying to hide your knowing smile as Heeseung approaches you, just like you anticipated. âOh? What happened to your friend?â You ask, looking behind him briefly. âI meanâyou kind of scared her off..â He swallows when you tilt your head âNot that you meant to or anything, I'm not saying that was your intention..âÂ
It definitely was, but okay.
â..or anything, itâs justâwhat was that?â He asks, your eyes scan over his face before falling to his mouth for a split secondâ almost unnoticeable. âWhat was what?â You ask cluelessly.
âI donât know y/n, that whole..,thingââ You tilt your head âI was just saying hi? Should I have not?â You ask, he swallows at the way you bat your eyelashes at him.
âNoâ of course not, I mean I'm glad you did.â You step closer, he doesn't step back. âReally?â
He nods too quickly.
âHm, cute.â You mumble almost to yourself, watching his face. âYou should probably go back to your little friend though, Chloe was it?â You look back, where that girl from earlier keeps glancing at him every few seconds by the makeshift bar. âClair.â He clears his throat.Â
Oh? Name correction, interesting.Â
âYeah, Clair.â You resist the urge to roll your eyes.
âIâll see you next Thursday, Heeseung, you knowâ for tutoring.â You smile one more time before turning and walking back to your friends, Heeseung just stands there for a moment, trying to processâprobably too hard.Â
But the way you said it, actually the way you said everything.. He watches you for a split second longer, his eyes canât help but fall to the sway of your hips especially in that skirt. He turns, walking back to Chloeâ or Clair, whateverâhe canât even think straight anymore.Â
âSo what the fuck was that?â Yunjin asks, âI donât know what youâre talking aboutâ You shrug, taking the cup she offers from her hand and sipping whatever is in it, Sunoo chuckles beside herâ unconvinced. She gives you a look, "I'm just having funâ You say through a laugh, they both roll their eyes, even more unconvinced than before.Â
-
Youâre late, for real this time. Seven minutes to be exact, not that heâs counting or anything. Heâs just been reviewing the material from the practice test you sent him via messages, with the words âIm so failing this class :(â written underneath.
He remembers letting a laugh slip before replying with a âYouâll understand it after Thursday, donât worry.âÂ
And now heâs watching as you approach the same table from last week, sunglasses perched on top of your head, Jeans low on your hips, tank top tight on your figureâyou would say itâs necessary for the warm weather, but also whatâs wrong with provoking a reaction from your totally cute tutor?
âY/nââ You settle for the seat across from him with a smile on your face. âHeeseung,â You say, pulling out your notebook from your bag. His eyes drop to your lips, the pinkish gloss coating them.Â
He clears his throat before looking back down at his own notebook, âRightâ so I actually looked over the problems you sent meââ He starts, you tilt your head. âWait, you actually went over those.â He pauses, looking at you againÂ
âWell, yeah..â He chuckles like it was supposed to be obvious â..It's kind of my jobâ I mean, as your tutor. I'm here to help you pass.â His lip quirks up, a ghost of a smile coating his face. Job, huh? âHm, I see.â
He continues âSo I re-did the equations but in a way I think youâd understand better.â He flips the notebook towards you, trying to ignore the way you lean forward, giving him a very clear view of what color your bra is.
Your eyebrow lifts, âIs this just dumbed down?â His eyes widen for a split second âWhatâNo, of course not. This just helps people understand betterâTrust me I know youâre not dumb, actually youâre really smart.âÂ
You canât help the smile that slips at his urgency to clear those thoughts from your head, âActually smart?â You look down at the paper again
âWere you not expecting me to be smart or something?â Something close to panic flashes across his features, pride across yours.
Maybe you are enjoying this too much.
âOf course not..â He swallows, slightly avoiding your lingering gaze, his ears turning a shade of pink. â..Well, actually I wasnâtâ itâs just, youâre really popular and social and stuffâlike parties every weekend. And youâre really pretty.â You bite the inside of your cheek to avoid smiling.Â
âNot that pretty people canât be smart of course, because you definitely areâ like really pretty.â His face is a shade of red now, hand rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.
âSorry, I know I talk too much, Iâm not trying to be rude, or creepy or anything like that.â He shifts in his seat, your silence making his heart race even faster. âI donât think it's creepy.â You shrug casually. âItâs actually kind of cute.â Your eyes drop to his nose, then to his lipsâ
âUmâthanks..?â You hum in response, looking back down at his notebook, his eyes follow yours âRight, umâ we should definitely get started.â
âOkay, see, 87% is not bad at all, youâre doing good,â His eyes locked on your computer screen, scrolling through the results of your 2nd attempt at the practice test for your exam. You roll your eyes,
âI seriously donât know how many more of these stupid tests I can do, and I don't need an 87, I need a 100.â He bites his lip in thought âNo, you need to stop being hard on yourself.â You look up at him, slightly surprised with his determined tone.
âYou're smart, itâs normal to not understand the material the second you see it. It takes practiceâI understand you want it to be perfect, trust me, I'm the same way.âÂ
âOkay then, I want to do it again.â He nods, restarting it and turning the computer towards you. âIm patient.â He says, watching the concern glint over your face. You no longer struggle to ask him a question when you need help on a problem like you did the first time you took the practice test, he smiles and nods every time you ask too.Â
â92.â You say, looking down at the score on your computer. âNot bad at all, your brain is starting to recognize the material.â He states, âUgh, Why canât you just be there beside me when I take the exam..â You frown.Â
âTrust me, if I could, I would.â He says through a chuckle. When your frown remains on your face, he speaks up again âLook, If you need me tooâ Iâd be more than happy to look over the notes she gave you, I can try and summarize it and send a video explaining it.âÂ
âYouâd really do that for me?â You ask, sitting up straighter. âItâs my goal to help you pass y/n, and of course Iâd do it for youâ how could I not..â He goes on âYou're pretty irresistible honestly, itâs kind of hard to say no to someone like you. But Iâd do it willingly of course.â
He swallows at the way your leg grazes his under the table, the touch burning even through his jeans. âThatâs really sweet Heeseung..â
âYeahâ of course, anything for you,â Your mouth twitches, shy of a smirk.Â
âAnything for me?â You ask, your foot tracing his calf over his jeans. He nods, trying soâ so hard to ignore the heat that courses through him at your touch, fuckâ why did he have to wear these jeans today.Â
Please go down, please, please..
âAre you okay Heeseung?â you tilt your head, almost genuine concern in your eyes. âYeah um, I justââ He checks the time on his phone, âI kind of have to get going, it's aâ coding thing.â He picks up his notebook, shoving it inside of his bag, standing up abruptly. Praying that you donât look down. âIâll send you that video, bye!âÂ
You try not to laugh at the way he canât even make direct eye contact with you, because the second he stands up your eyes fall to the bulge in his jeans. This time you swallow because either youâre really tired or Lee Heeseung might be... Big?Â
âHeeseung,â You call out before he can go around the corner, he turns, âThanks for your help.â You smile innocently, like youâre not the very reason he has to leave so abruptly to get rid of his raging hard on.
He nods before turning the corner. You take your time packing up your stuff, not even aware of the small smile that coats your face, which hasnât disappeared.Â
-
He has to be reading into it too much, because that's something he's good at; overanalyzing, coming to insane conclusionsâŚThereâs no way you might actually like him back? Right? No he has to be going crazy.
He looks down at the messages on his phone one more time.
Heeseung: [video attachment]Â
Heeseung: i went over the notes and tried to explain them better for you in this, let me know if it helps
You: oh my gosh?
You: Thank you so much Heeseung this is insane
Heeseung: of course, im just happy I can help you
You: I feel kind of bad though.. :(Â
Heeseung: why would you feel bad?
You: youâre doing all this for me and I haven't really done much in return.. with the tutoring lessons being free and all
Heeseung: please donât worry about it y/n
Heeseung: If anything youâre helping meÂ
You: ughh
You: I still feel bad..
You: how about this, if I pass my exam on Thursday, instead of tutoring me you can come to my place so we can celebrate! :)
He's been staring at the message for the past five minutes, part of him debating going to Jake and asking for advice, but something about this feels different? Like a shared secret between the two of you.
Heeseung: Iâd love to
Heeseung: do you want me to bring some food over then?
You: No silly, im going to cook
Heeseung: wait you can cook?
You: a pretty girl whos smart and can cook, are you shocked? :0
Heeseung: thats not what I meant
Heeseung: SorryÂ
Heeseung: I'm sure you can cook
Heeseung: whatever you make is probably amazing
You: Im just teasing you Hee
You: ill see you around mk?
Oh my God, youâre going to kill him, like actually kill him. Sure it's just messages but something about you giving him a nickname like thatâ yeah his heart definitely just stopped for a second. Fuckâ Jake's right, he is pathetic.Â
Heeseung: yeah sorry again
Heeseung: I'll see you
He cringes looking down at the part where he actually stumbled over his words on fucking i-messages, turning off his phone before he can do anything else stupid.Â
â..and why are you smiling at your phone like that?â Yunjin asks, raising her brow while painting her nails. âWhat? I'm not smiling.â You say, putting your phone face down on her bed.
âNope, you definitely wereâ like cheesing ear to ear.â She adds, blowing on her nails to dry them.Â
âLet me guess, Heeseung?â She says, teasing glint in her eyes. âUhâno, what? Why would you think it's him? Heâs like just my tutor, and plus he's a total nerd, and a loser.â She blinks once, then she laughs. âW-why are you laughing?â You ask, sitting up in her bed.
âYou like him donât you? Like actuallyââ She starts, âNo! I donâtâ why would I like him? Noââ You stammer over your words.
âCalm down, I'm not hating on you for it or anything, I honestly just thought you were giving him the time of day because of how down bad he is for you, you know?â She watches you closely
âI'm serious, I thought you just liked teasing him at first, but noâ you genuinely like Lee HeeseungââÂ
You stand up to put your hand over her mouth, âMy nails!ââ She says through a laugh, âDo not finish that sentenceââ You say, trying to cover your own smiling face with a serious one, failing miserably. âFine, fine.â She says, hands raised innocently, checking to make sure her nails are still good. You roll your eyes, sitting on the edge of her bed.
âJust be careful y/n, okay?â you pick up your phone, nodding âYeah, yeah whatever.â You say through a small laugh.
-
Your fingers are literally crossed under the table as Professor Kim hands out the graded exam papers. You bite your lip as she comes closer to you, she looks down at the paper than at you before smiling.
âGood job Y/n, I'm glad to see the tutoring is helping.â She says before placing the paper on the table.Â
96%.
Youâre seeing things right, because Professor Kim doesn't just hand out A+ grades like that.
The first thing that comes to your mind; Heeseung. Youâre thankful when she ends her lecture early.Â
You remember going to the computer science building a few times when you and Sunoo met up after his class, and obviously now you know that Heeseung happens to have the same class, why not surprise him, heâs obviously going to be proud!
âY/n?â Sunoo questions, walking out of the computer lab, mint green bag hung on his shoulder.
âWhat are you doing here?â He asks through a chuckle. âIs uh.. Heeseung in there?â He raises a brow âYeah.. pretty sure heâs staying for some club meetingâ Gaming development or something.â
You nearly laugh, because of course someone like him would be in a fucking Gaming Developemnt club. You peek behind him to get a look inside the lab, âIâll see you later Sunoo,â he shakes his head before disappearing down the hall
You open the door to the lab and spot the back of his head immediately, even if it is covered in a grey beanie.
Your eyes drift to the left side of him. Fucking hell. Can this girl not catch a hint? You donât even care about the heads turning as you make your way further into the room. Surprised that a girl like you is walking into the middle of a club like this.Â
âYou definitely know a lot about this stuff, Heeseung, itâs really impressiveââ Clair starts, but stops when Heeseung's eyes drift to you, a slightly shocked expression on his face âY/nâ what are you doing here?â You roll your eyes.Â
âEveryone keeps asking me that.â You cross your arms over your chest, ignoring the way his friends' eyes switch to you and Heeseung like he canât believe what heâs seeing.Â
âI have something to show you.â You say, not even caring how it sounds. âWe were busy working on something and this is a private club meeting actually, so im not sure how you evenââ Clair starts, tone clearly bitter.Â
âOkay well good thing itâs only for him to see, and not you.â You interrupt, finally look at her.
âYouâre not even supposed to be in here thoughââ Her hand leaves the back of Heeseung's chair as he stands up. âItâs fine, I can talk to her outside if I have to,â he says, moving past Clair, you tilt your head sweetly at her before walking with Heeseung out into the hallway.Â
âOkay Y/n, whatââ You pull out the folded paper from your bag, biting your lip eagerly.
âGo on, open it.â You say, he looks at you, eyes falling to your lips before opening the paper. âHoly shitâ96?â He exclaims, a smile coming to his face almost immediately. You nod, humming in response
âI knew you could do it, and I mean⌠this is a lot, even for Professor Kim, godâyouâre amazing.â He says looking down at the paper. âItâs because of your help yâknowâ You say, stepping closer.
His eyes flick up to yours, âI meanâit was really all you, truly. I just helped a littleââ He says, chuckling. âWeâre still on for tonight though, right? I still have to repay you for helping meâ You smile sweetly. âRepay me?â He asks, eyes falling to your low cut top for a split secondâalmost unnoticeable.
âYeah, I'm cooking too, remember?â You bring your hand up, picking at an invisible piece of lint from the collar of his shirt. Thank God he wore a beanie today, or else you would have seen the embarrassing shade of pink his ears just turned.
âYou really donât have to do that for me y/nâ seeing your score was honestly rewarding enough, trulyâI donât want to make you feel like you have to do something for me..â he says, hand coming up to the back of his neck. âI know, but I want to. So let me,â
âOkayâ but seriously if you change your mindââÂ
âI wonât, Hee,â You say through a laugh, the nickname shoots heat straight through him âIâll see you later mâkay?â You smile, feigning innocence.Â
You stand up on your tip toes to press a small kiss to his cheek before giving him one last wave âBye Hee,â
He presses his hand to his cheek, why is he burning up right now? No way that actually just happenedâ
He makes his way back into the computer lab, mind still replaying the interaction over and over again, the softness of your lipsâ hell, even the way you were looking at him. Jake shoots him a side eyeÂ
âDude, are you good?â He asks, trying to hold in a laugh. âWhatâhuh?â Heeseung questions, fixing his beanie. âYou look a little.. Flushed.â He says through a smirk, eyeing the light pink gloss mark on the side of his face.
âIm not flushedââ Jake points to the mark on his face, making Heeseung touch his own.
He turns an even more embarrassing shade at the light pink glossy residue coating his finger tips, earning a laugh from his best friend,
-
So what if you made sure to clean up extra good before he came over, and itâs not like he's going to even know you looked up a recipe online for how to make pasta. At least it tastes decent.
You bite your lip anxiously, fixing your hair in the reflection of your microwave before moving to open the door for Heeseung.Â
âI know what youâre going to sayâ but I figured we could fit some studying in..â He says, watching as you chuckle before inviting him in and closing the door behind him.
âI shouldnât even be surprisedâ You say through a laugh. He takes off his shoes, something he's always done growing up. He looks around your apartment, the light pink walls that you managed to convince your landlord to let you paint, everything is very you.
A faint sweet smell lingering in the air, slightly clashing with the rich scent of the pasta you made. His eyes fall to the pan, âWowâ it looks..â âEdible?â You finish, eyebrow raised.
He laughs, âI was going to say amazingâ He gives you a look as if to ask if he can put his bag down, âMake yourself comfortable Hee, I donât biteâ You smile as he places his bag down on your couch.
He walks back over to the kitchen, watching as you grab two plates from the upper cabinet. âLet me help you,â He says, taking the plate from you. âHeeseung, I'm the one who invited youââ You say, rolling your eyes. âFine, fineâ
You place the plates on the center table in the small living room. He tries so, so hard to not let his eyes wander but you make it hard for them not too.Â
â..want a drink?â
âHuh?â He asks, running a hand through his hair. âI was asking if you wanted a drinkâ You say through a laugh, placing two glasses on the counter. âOhâ yeah, thanksâ He says, sipping the dark red wine yunjin got you for your birthday last year.
âGood right?â You ask, tilting your head. âI donât really drink much but anything youâd give me is good,â He pauses âLike any foodâ or drinkâ You chuckle
âI know, just try the food,â You say, sitting down on the couch beside him. He takes the first bite, slight surprise washing over his features before he looks at you.
Your eyes are curious watching for his reaction. âThat'sâ that's really good y/nâ He says, taking another bite. You smile proudly before doing the same.Â
You two have been there for a while, glasses empty. Too lazy to get up for a refillââWhat are you doing?â You ask, watching him stand up.
âI meant what I said about extra practiceââ He grabs his bag âYou cannot be serious right now Hee.âÂ
That nickname again, the one that makes him feel things he probably shouldn't from just words. But he needs to do something, anything to take his mind off the fact that he's here alone, with a pretty girl like you..studying is obviously the only ethical option.Â
He grabs the notebook from his bag, along with his laptop. âIm very serious, isnât your next exam coming up soon?â He asks, opening his laptop and sitting on the couch.
âIn like a month..â You say, rolling your eyes and settling next to him. He swallows at how close the proximity is, youâre just so warm next to him.Â
âAll you do is help me study.. I still feel bad about it, and now we're about to do it again.â You frown, and he finally turns to look at you.
Regrets it immediately, because his eyes drop to the way you push your breasts together almost unnoticeably before flicking back up to yours. âI already said, it's my job andââ You shut the laptop.Â
âA job you donât even get anything for.â You say, sliding the laptop off his lap and onto the coffee table. âIts really the creditsâ I also like helping you, even though youâre already pretty smart, I really donât mindââ He continues on.
âFineââ You say, leaning back against the couch. âOkayâyeah, perfect, it makes me feel better if weâre ahead anyway.â He says with a smile.Â
For the past 30 minutes, everything has been going in one ear and out the other, because hearing about physics sure as hell wasn't how you were planning to thank him tonight.
â..and that's how you get from point A to point B in this equationââÂ
âHeeseung.â You interrupt, he stops explaining, pencil hovering over the notebook, turning to look at you. âI can start from the beginning, I donât mindââÂ
âNo, Godâ no, Iâm just..â You look down at the paper, âI donât wanna study anymore.â He puts the pencil down, âBut the extra practice is goodââ You lean in closer, probably too close,Â
âStudying is all we do, I invited you here so we could take a break from that, you know? Celebrate where that studying got us, and properly thank you.â He looks at you with wide eyes when you face him on the couch, legs curled beneath you.Â
âI though the uh, I thought the food was the thank you..â you spot the small bead of sweat near his eyebrow and nearly laugh. âDo I make you nervous or something?â You ask, his ears turn that pathetic shade of pink.
He nods, âY-yeah.â Unable to even form a proper lie or excuse for the way his skin is probably burning with anticipation. âWhy?â You ask, tilting your head curiously.
âWell I meanâ how could I not, youâre really pretty, and really intimidating..â He pauses
â..I didnât even think it was possible for a girl like you to be into someone like meâ not saying that youâre into me or anything, I wouldn't object to you being into me obviously, I mean I'm clearly in youâ I mean, into you. Itâs hard not to be honestlyââ You watch the way his mouth moves before his brain processes what he's saying.
ââI was hoping it wasnât obvious, is it obvious? Okay now im just rambling im sorry, I canât help itâ you just make me really nervousâ He's breathing hard now, sitting up completely straight.
âCute.â You smile, watching the confusion on his face. âIf I wasnât mistaken, Iâd think you have a crush on me.â You scoot closer, probably invading his personal space.
As if heâd complain.
âDo you have a crush on me, Lee Heeseung?â Your eyes fall to his lips âIâ well.. No?âŚâ He shuts his eyes for a moment, trying to calm the rapid beating of his heart
ââŚsorry, that's a lie. I mean, How could I not.. I likeâ I like you, which is probably not professional for a tutor and student relationship but Iââ You shut him up immediately when your lips press against his.
Your lips are soft, when you pull back a few seconds later his tongue darts out to lick his own lips, the faint strawberry taste of your lipgloss remaining, his expression is almost comedic.
He doesn't think twice before closing the distance again, needing to feel your lips on his, you let out a sound into his mouth, your hand trailing up to rest on his shoulder, he grips your waist, tugging you closer.Â
You swing your leg over his, allowing you to straddle his lap, deepening the kiss further, you wrap your hands around his neck, tangling your hands in his hair, a light tug making him groan into your mouth pathetically.
His hands are unsure at your hips, still in shock that heâs actually here right now, in your home, touching youâ kissing you. When you slip your tongue in his mouth, his fingers dig into the flesh of your hips, you roll them softly and his breath hitches.Â
âP-please do that again..â he breathes out, looking down when you roll your hips again, you feel him growing hard, demanding beneath youâand undoubtedly big. âTouch me Heeââ You whisper, nipping at his bottom lip.
One hand slips under your shirt, feeling the softness of your back, the other trailing down to rest on your ass gently, offering a squeeze.Â
âLike this?â He asks, voice roughâneedy. âMhmâ You nod, rolling your hips forward against his, he thrusts up once from the friction,
âS-shitâ sorry, I'm sorryââ You lower your lips, kissing just below his jaw, "Donât apologize" This time when you grind against him, he reciprocates it, the hard line of his cock grinding perfectly between your legs.
âYouâre so prettyâ He mumbles, both hands cupping your ass through your pants, you smile against his neck before pressing one more delicate kiss to his jaw.
When your lips leave his skin a sound breaks from him. âWhatââ He watches as you slide off his lap.
âI wanna suck you off.â You say bluntly, his heart beat picks up even faster than before.Â
His hands sit awkwardly at his sides like he doesnât know what to doâ which quite frankly, he doesn't. You lick your lips before reaching for his jeans. Heeseung stops your hand, gripping onto your wrist.
âWaitâ You pause, looking up at him. âI just want to make it clear that uhâ this..â he looks down at the very visible bulge in his jeans. â..this isnât why I came hereâ you donât have to..â You rest your hand on his thigh.Â
âI know I donât have to. But I want to.â You clarify. He bites down on his lip, his cock aching to be set free from its confinement. âI wanna repay you, like I said.â You smile as his grip on your wrist loosens.
Unbuttoning his pants, fingers hooking around the waistband, he lifts his hips allowing you to pull down his jeans and boxers in one go.
âHoly shitââ You say, gaping at the sheer size of him. Flushed pink at the mushroom tip, and so fucking wet.
Your eyes trail along the prominent vein on the underside before looking up at him. He looks nervous as hell right now, âIs itâ is there something wrong with it?â he asks, gulping.Â
You shake your head immediately, now youâre the one swallowing with the sudden dryness in your throat. âNoâ definitely not. It's just.. likeâ You lick your lips âReally big.â
âDo you normally get this..wet?â You ask, wrapping your handâ or attempting to wrap it around the base.Â
He winces at the feeling of your soft palm before nodding. âIs that aâfuck.. Is that a bad thing?â He asks, tone utterly pathetic.
You answer with a long lick from the base to the tip, gathering what you can of his leaking pre cum, the saltiness coating your tastebuds in the best way possible.
He lets out a wrecked sound, the feeling of a tongue on him so newâ
âNot at all.â You mumble, running your tongue along the underside of his tip. His hips buck at the sensation, mouth hanging open, watching you.
This time he doesn't say sorry. You smile against him before wrapping your mouth around him, trying to take as much as you can, you brace one of your hands on his thigh, the other one wrapping around the base of his cock.
It's so worth it once the most pathetic moan escapes past his lips and he makes no move to hide it.Â
âI-its so warmââ He groans, hand coming up to tangle in your hair purely on instinct. You hum and the vibration makes his hips jerk instantly, forcing more of himself in the warm column of your throat. âY/nâ I canât..â He says, biting his lipâtrying to watch you but it's so hard to with the way his eyes flutter shut.
His sounds give you even more motivation as you bob your head faster, squeezing the base of his cock. âW-wait, slow downââ He tries to pull your head back, but you stay put as his warm cum spills down your throat, his grip on your hair falters as you milk him dry.
You pull off of him, cum coating your lips, looking up at his face, the sweat beside his eyebrow, to his glazed eyes, then back down to his still hard dick.
âYouâre..â You breathe out, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand and blinking once âYouâre still hardââ You say, watching as a small bead of cum dribbles down his cock along the thick vein. âI should have said somethingâ Once it gets like this..â He looks down at his dick, standing proud â..it takes um, a few tries to get it down.â He swallows.
He moves to pull his boxers back up to tuck it back but you stop him. âHave you ever had a handjob?â You ask, standing up and sitting next to him. He shakes his head shyly. âIve never really had anyoneâ you know.â You smile at that,
âGood, I wanna make you cum again.â His cheeks flush at that, but he nods because who is he to say no to such an offer? Â
-
It doesnât stop there. What used to be a dreamâ a fantasy in Heeseung's mind is actually actively coming true.
Who would have thought innocent tutoring lessons would turn into something like this? A shared secret between the two of you that your friends are definitely picking up on.Â
Based on the way you walk around even more confidently than before, and the way you actually look for Heeseung in a roomâonly to find him already staring at you.
To be completely honest, you donât know what it is you have going on, but the attention feels so fucking goodâespecially after what happened just a few days ago,
âSo what did you need help with?â You had asked, following him into the computer lab, which was empty due to it being after hours. âNothing,â He said, Your brow lifting immediately, âYou literally asked me to come here,â
âI just need to check something.â He mumbles, you cross your arms over your chest, âThat sounds suspicious.â
He looks up at you, loading in his work in progress of a game, âItâs not.â You roll your eyes, âYeah will it sound like it.â
He exhales, trying to sound as least suspicious as possible, âCan you justâstand there for a second.â You blink once, âWhat?âÂ
âJust a second,â You tap your finger against your crossed arm, âWhy?â He continues clicking stuff on his computer, âBecause I asked,â He says simply, âThatâs not a reason.â
He looks up at you again, almost pleading look in his eyes. âFine, even though this is weird.â You say, giving in.
He turns his monitor away from you, and you shift slightly. His eyes flick between his screen and youânot awkwardly, just with extreme focus, like heâs studying you. â..what are you doing?â you finally ask, âNothing.â He mutters, âyouâre staring.â
âNo, im observing,â He says confidently, the sound of his mouse clicking and keyboard typing filling the space between the two of you. âThat's worse.â,
âCan you just turn a little to the left..â He asks with a vague gesture. âWhy?âÂ
âI just need to see something,â You huff, âWhy are we doing this Heeseung?â he hesitates for a split second, âItâs for my game.â he admits.
âThe one youâve been working on?â He nods, looking up at you again, then back to the screen.
âSo what does that have to do with me?â You narrow your eyes slightly, âI needed a reference,â He says, biting his lip nervously, waiting for you to call him a creepâ a weirdo, obsessive freak maybe?
But when you smile, he canât help but mirror the action, quickly going back to focusing when you do eventually turn for him.
Heeseung's cute, attractive in a way the guys you've been with before weren't.
The first time you walked into his room a little bit over a week ago for tutoringâwhich ultimately led to a very heated makeout session, and you learning that he really likes kissing.
His room didn't even surprise you, hellâ he even had a whole section dedicated to Toy Story figures.
You also learned that heâs a pretty big gamer, and takes it very seriouslyâ probably why heâs in that Gaming development club or whatever the fuck.
Your favorite part is how shy he gets, especially when you say the most out of pocket things.
âSo youâve never eaten a girl out before?â You ask, sitting up straight on his bed.
His face turns an embarrassing shade of red. âIâNo..â he says, shifting in his gaming chair, thankful the notebook in his lap covers the way his cock is already half hard from the words alone.Â
You tilt your head, smiling. âDo you even know where the clit is?â You ask through a chuckle.
âWhatâ Why are you..â He looks down at his notebook, then at the physics papers scattered across his bed where you sit.
ââŚWe should be focusing on studying right now y/nââ You roll your eyes, gathering the papers together in one stack. âJust answer the question Hee.â That nickname again. The one that really gets him, and you know it.
âI did a human anatomy study for one of my classes last semesterâvery detailed, so, kind of? I think.â Your brow raises at that. âYeah? So you think youâre some expert now?â You ask, leaning back on your palms.
He finally removes the notebook from his lap, setting it on the cluttered table behind him. Your eyes immediately fall to the very clear bulge in his sweatpants that he makes no move to hide anymore.Â
âIs this you trying to distract me from studying again?â He asks, standing up. âIs it working?â You question, biting your lip.
âI had to lie to the tutoring lab administrators the other day, about the tutoring hours yâknow. I couldnât just tell them the pretty girl I got assigned to, spent half the time sucking me off instead of actually doing her workâ He says, not exactly sure where this newfound confidence of his is coming fromâbut from the way your cheeks flush that perfect shade of pink, he must be doing something right.Â
âCouldnât tell them she wears these little tops that seem to get smaller every session, these shorts that get tighterâ absolutely kills me,â he admits, looking down at your bare legs.
âI did tell them that youâre a great student, good at comprehending the material, always focused on the task at hand.â He climbs on the bed with you until you're laying flat on your back.
âKind of lied about the focus part though, youâre more of a distractionâ a really good one at that.â He clarifies, dipping his head to kiss the sensitive spot below your ear he just discovered the other day.  Â
âHeeââ You breathe out, running a hand through his hair, he pulls back looking down at you. Humming in response, already lost in you.
âAre you going to eat me out or not?â You ask bluntly, you don't miss the pink shade that covers his ears. âYou should know by now that I'll do anything you ask me too,â He says, licking his lips.Â
He pulls back, looking down at you. âIve been thinking about this you know, can I admit that?â he asks, smoothing both of his hands down your bare thighsâtesting.
You nod, hooking your fingers around the waistband of your jeans shorts, but he stops your hand. âI want to look at you like this for a littleââ
âI think about you a lot actually, probably more than I should.â He adds, lowering himself to the soft carpet of his bedroom floor.
âEver since that first day of Econ too, remember when you tapped my shoulder?â He smiles, you nod. âI swear I couldn't get you out of my headâ not in a creepy way, but you justââ He presses a gentle kiss to your calfâ not quite sure if this is what he's supposed to be doing, but it feels right.Â
âYou have an effect on people y/n, I donât even think you realize it.â He whispers, looking up at you.
âHeeseung..â
âI know, it's a lotâ there's so much more I have to say too.â He chuckles, still unbelieving that youâre right here in front of him.
âBut I reallyâreally want to do this right now.â He admits, fingers finally hooking around the waistband of your shorts.
He pulls them down slowly, the movement intimate, like he's treasuring each reactionâ studying it harder than he does his schoolwork, or whatever video game he plays.Â
You sit up on your elbows to get a better view, and it's so worth it.
He looks up once, and when you nod his fingers move to pull your underwear down as well, and he moansâactually moans at the sight of you.
âEven your pussy is perfectââ He says, licking his lips. The words cause even more arousal to drip out of you. He swipes his finger through your folds once, gathering someâ the touch makes your hips jolt.
âAfter, we can finish Toy Story 2 right?â He asks, looking up at youâeyes practically sparkling. You nod immediately âYesâ fuck, Heeseung..â You breathe out, watching him lick the juices from his fingers.
âJust need your mouth on meâ now.â You demand, he smiles âStill bossy as ever.â Before mirroring the same action of his finger, licking a stripe up your pussy, because this is what heâs supposed to do right?
He tries making out with your pussy, and from the moans that leave your lips he must be doing something right. There's something messy about the way he does it,
âJust like thatâ are you..fuckâ You moan when his nose bumps your clit, â..are you sure youâve never done this?â You ask, breaths coming in heavy pants as he hums against you, your hips bucking against his face.Â
He discovers a rhythm, alternating between teasing your aching hole with the tip of his tongue, and flicking it over your throbbing clitâ the sensitive bud craving the touch.
He pulls back for a moment, admiring the mess he's made before gathering some spit in his mouth and letting it drop right onto your pussy.Â
Where the fuck did he learn that from.Â
He looks up at you, the way your mouth hangs open before latching his lips onto your clit, taking it into his mouth and swirling his tongue around it.
âOh my Godâ Hee, I canât..â You give up on holding yourself up with your arms as your fingers tangle through his soft locks, pulling him even closer to you. He groans into the heat of you, the sounds of him eating you out filthyâÂ
âI needââ You say, trying to get your words out, he parts from your clit, looking up at you, the bottom half of his face completely covered in your slick, but he could care less about that right nowâif anything it's rewarding.
âI need your fingers, Heeseung..â You whimper, he brings his middle finger to your entrance, teasing it subtly,
âLike this?â he asks, watching your face for approval. You nod, he pushes the tip of his finger in, your hole welcoming him in with ease
âItâs so wetâso warmâ he observes, pushing it in deeper, you hold onto his wrist. âMmmâ Hee..â You cry out as his finger curls experimentally.Â
He watches your reaction before doing it once more, noting how you tighten around him at the movement.
âYouâre so prettyâseriously, I canât get enough of you..â He whispers, the words easily falling out, your eyes flutter shut.
He moves your hand from his wrist, setting it on top of his head.
âPull itâI donât care, it feels goodâ He admits, curling his finger deeper, using his other hand to prevent your legs from closing around his head.Â
And youâre thankful he did because the second his tongue is back on you, youâre tugging at the strands, his finger curling and uncurling inside of you, mixed with the way he slurps at your clit
This has to be the best head youâve ever gottenâhands down. Inexperienced guys really do eat pussy the best.Â
âF-fuck Hee, Iâ Im close..â You warn, but it only makes him more determinedâthe thought of you actually cumming, and even better, him being the one to give you that pleasure fuels him even more.
His finger repeatedly brushing a spot inside of you that you canât reach and his tongue flicking your clit through his pursed lips has you completely undoneâreaching your high with his name on your tongue, pulling at his hairâ not sure if you want him off or even closerâdefinitely closer.
He moans against your pussy like he's the one getting pleasure, in all fairnessâhe probably is.Â
Your back arches off the bed as your juices coat his face, he doesn't even care if it drips down his chin, wetting the sheets below you, he still tries to greedily lap up what he can, finger never leaving inside of you until the rise and fall of your chest slows.
Only then does he lift his head from between your legs, looking up at you for approval. âT-theres no way that was youâre first timeâ You say, watching as he stands up, licking his lips.
âSo you would let me do it again?â He asks, picking up your underwear from the floor, âIs that a serious question Heeseung?â He chuckles,
âGood, because I think I maybeâ kind of got the hang of it.â He says, moving to put on your underwear for you. And you let him, âI might need to do it a few more times to make sureâ for research purposes.. And stuff.â
He clears his throat, you canât help but laugh, wincing at the way the cloth of your underwear feels on your sensitive pussy. He presses a kiss just above your waistband. You swallow at the actionâ how genuine it felt, how genuine the boy before you is.
You watch as he lays against the headboard of the bed, cock clearly hard in his pants before raising your brow. âWhat?â he says through a chuckle, flipping through the apps on his TV looking for the Toy Story 2 movie.
âYouâre just going to sit here, with that?â You ask, still laid down on his bed. âYou said we could watch Toy Story 2â I thought..â He shifts when you sit up, crawling to lay next to him.Â
âGodâ you really are a nerd.â You say through a laugh, âHeyâ the plot is a lot deeper than they make it out to be, I think youâre really underestimating the whole thingââ He starts,
âHeeseung, just put the movie on.â You shake your head, he presses a sloppy kiss to your forehead before doing just that.
But its safe to say you didnât let him deal with his little (big) problem for much longer after that.
-
âWhy are you doing that?â Jake asks, side eyeing Heeseung as he works on the code before himâ while also smiling.
âHuh? Doing what?â He questions, looking at his friend for a split second.
âThat smiling thing.â
Heeseung scoffs, âIâm not doing any type of smiling thing.â Jake's eyes fully leave his monitor to really look at him.
âYâknow, youâre absolutely shit at lying.â Jake says, âIâm not evenâ what,â
âItâs y/n huh?â Jake says for him. âShut upââ Heeseung mutters, tone a hushed whisper.
âHoly shitâ no fucking way she actually..â Heeseung's ears go that pathetic shade of pink, âDonât be so loud okay? Iâ she doesnât want anyone knowing anythingâ Heeseung says, seriously.
Jake raises a brow at that âWhat is she embarrassed or something?â
âNoâ itâs just, Iâ It doesnât matter, okay?â Heeseung says, voice low. âI dunno man, you really like her, right?âare you sure..âÂ
âHeeseung?â That familiar voice cuts through, Clair.
Part of him thankful for taking him away from this conversation with his best friend. âHey, what's up?â He immediately says, ignoring Jake's annoyed huff.
âWeâre going to the dining hall to get somethingâ the others are really hungry, especially with the deadline coming up.â She says, biting her lip anxiously.
âDo you wanna come withâ you too, Jake.â She adds, looking behind him for a split second.Â
He looks back down at his computer, the half finished code nowhere near ready, âI canât. I have to finish this.â Heeseung says, cursing himself for being so distracted.
âOh, umâokay, want us to bring something backââ
Jake interrupts immediately. âYeah, pretty sure they're doing that good ramen today, thanks Clair.â She shoots him a look before glancing back at Heeseung, who is in fact back to working on the code.
âYeah, sure.â She replies, both of the boys missing the tone of her voice.Â
âI seriously donât understand his obsession with her.â Clair says, making her way to the dining haul. âI mean she's like really pretty.â Her friend says quietly.
âNot that prettyâI donât get why someone like her would even go for someone like Heeseung, I mean they are like the complete opposite!â She says through a whine.Â
âNot to mention she's a total bitch.â Her friend side eyes her âI donât get why you even like Heeseung in the first place, yeah he's cute and all but if youâre actually in competition with Y/n I fearââÂ
âShut upâ She's probably just using him anyway.â Clair mumbles, stepping into the line,
âUsing Heeseung?â Her friend questions through a laugh âYeah, I mean, she's known for being a slut. Wouldnât doubt if none of those frat guys wanted her anymore so she had to move for him out of all people.â Her friend shakes her head âlm gonna get the fruits, try not to explode while im gone.â Clair rolls her eyes at the comment.
âI really canât.. I promised him.â You say, looking down at your phone. âAre you serious Y/n? Last month you were like begging to go to party after party and now you donât want to? Is the dick that good?â Sunoo asks, earning a laugh from Yunjin beside him.
âThey canât reschedule for next Saturday instead?â You ask, biting your lip while looking past the line of people waiting for foodâ guess this is what you get for coming when everyone was on a break.Â
âI mean, I wouldn't doubt if one of those frat guys would cancel it if you asked,â Yunjin says with a smirk. âIâm not going, end of storyâ I promised Heeseung and I canât break it.â You say proudly,
âOkay, fine, why donât you just bring him then?â Sunoo suggests, You look at him like he's crazy. âAre you kidding?â You ask, looking at the both of them. âUhâ no babe, dead serious. I mean he's clearly down bad for you, and by the looks of it youâre pretty damn close.â Yunjin states.
âHesââ You chuckle, âhes not even the party type. like seriously, he hates them.â
They look at each other, âYou sure itâs not something else.. Like maybe the concept of hard launching with someone like him?â Sunoo asks, tilting his head. âWhatâ you guys are ridiculous.â You mutter.Â
âPlus, the only reason why he was at that one party was because he saw that story I postedâ You smile at the memory,
âTold me himself the otherday.â You say proudly. You miss the way the girl in front of you stills.
âSo he literally admitted to stalking you.â Sunoo says, brow raised. âHe so was, and you love it too.â Yunjin adds through a laugh
âSo what if it feels good? Am I not allowed to have fun?â You ask, rolling your eyes. âI think youâre having a little more than fun..â Sunoo mumbles.
You tighten your lips to hide your smile before looking past the line of people, âThis is exactly why we donât come here during peak hours.âÂ
âHeeseungââ Clair says first thing as she walks back into the computer lab, He lifts his head, acknowledging.
âIââ She pauses, Jake raises a brow beside him. âThere's something you should knowâ She says quickly.
âIs it about the development? If you need help on something I can..â He starts âIt's not about anything with the clubâ it's about that girl.â She says, shifting on her feet.Â
Heeseung looks behind him at his best friend before turning back to Clair,
âY/n?â He questions, because who else could she be talking about..
âYes.â
âLook, if it's about how she can sometimes be a little.. intimidating..â he pauses, trying to think of the right word, "That's just how she is, donât take it personalââÂ
"It's not about that!â She says louder than intended, causing a few eyes to look her way and Jake to make a noise beside him.
âLookâ can we talk outside?â She asks with an almost nervous tone. âOh, um..â He looks down at his monitor before looking back up
â..yeahâ um, yeah sure.â He mumbles before standing up and following her out into the empty hallway.
âSo what's upââ
âSheâs using you.â Clair says flatly. He pausesâwhat?Â
âShesâ who?â He swallows, eyebrows furrowing in confusion at the girl in front of him. âY/n, sheâs using you,â He looks down at his feet,
âWhy would she use me?â He questions almost to himself, a dry chuckle leaving his throat.Â
Clair looks at him, trying to bite back another emotion from rising.
âI overheard her talking with her friends in the dining hall.â Clair starts, his eyes are back on her, âThey were pretty much talking about how you were just an ego booster for herâbecause she was bored.â She says, not even caring if she's twisting the conversation into something that will hopefully benefit her.Â
âW-whatââ Heeseung searches her eyes for somethingâanything, amusement maybe? To say this is just some fucked up joke?
âNoâ that doesnât make any sense, she wouldn't do something like that..âÂ
He bites his lip and thought, trying to replay your moments togetherâ those moments in private.
The ones no one knows about except the two of youâ your shared secret.
âItâs true Heeseung, I heard themâÂ
He shakes his head, unbelievingâ because you wouldn't do that, no you wouldn't. You said you cared about him,
Clair is lying, she has to be.Â
âAre you lying to me?â Heeseung asks, looking her dead in the eye.
She swallows, âNoâ Heeseung, why would I lie about this? I'm telling you what I heard, sheâs using you for her own benefit, that's how girls like her are..â
He scoffs âGirls like her? What does that mean?â she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, âYou know what I'm talking about.. Those attention whoresââÂ
âDonât.â He interrupts, "Don't speak about her like thatâ sheâs not,â
He sighs "That's not what she is, okay?â He breathes out
âBut im trying to tell youââ She starts
âWhy? Why would you be telling me this? What's the point of it?â He asks, trying to contain the fear in his chest right now. The doubt starting to cloud his judgement.
âBecause you deserve someone better, Heeseungâsomeone who actually appreciates you, not someone who's trying to use you!â She says, reaching out for his arm.
He steps back, out of her grasp. âIâ I donât believe you.â He whispers, lips in a tight line.
âBut I heard herââ She says, voice stern, forcing him to believe it, or even herself.
âNo, youâ you donât know her like I do, you donât.â He states, hand already on the door knob of the computer lab.Â
âSo stay out of it.â He says, tone completely different to how he normally is, that defensive wall coming up, shielding him from thisâ this accusation.
She opens her mouth to speak but closes it when he opens the door to the lab, moving past her.Â
âYoâare you good?â Jake asks, watching as Heeseung powers off the computer, tossing his stuff in his bag.
âIm fine. Something came up.â he says, not bothering to look up.
âHeeseungââ Jake starts, confused as his friend walks out without saying another word.
-
There's no way any of it is true, I meanâ you out of all people, using him, Heeseung, the guy who is described as some loser-nerd who plays video games all day and apparently âcanât get any pussyâ according to Jake. At least that's who he's known as to everyone else, but with you it felt different.Â
So It canât be true. Why would you even use someone like him! It makes no sense, you wouldnât do thatâ not for your own benefit, not to make yourself feel better, not because you were bored or needed an ego boost from a guy who would clearly do anything for you. Including spending extra hours way past the limit making sure you passed one of the most challenging classes.Â
You were the first girl to give him a blowjob for fucks sake!
First girl who even let him get close enough to actually eat your pussyâ which he still canât believe happened and replays constantly in his mind.
You care about him, you do!â or is he imaging it all?Â
Is this really just some sick mind gameâ are you playing him? Is what Clair said really true?
Noâ he canât let these thoughts cloud his mind, because he likes you, probably more than like honestly, but you like him too right?
I mean, how could you let someone get so close to you without actually liking them, right?Â
He's spiraling, like actually going insane. Now that these thoughts are in his head he cant get them outâ
Is this the reason why everything between you two is in private?
No, donât connect the dots, donât assume. Godâ why is he here right now, and why is he so damn nervous.Â
No, right tutoringâthat's his purpose right now, being your tutor.
His hand hovers over your door before knocking.
âHeyâcome in, I just got back from Yunjinâs, and I picked up a little something on my way back,â You say, opening the door and walking back to your kitchen.
He nods before removing his shoes and following you, setting his bag on the island stool.
âIt smells really good, are you cooking?â He asks, watching as you squat down to look inside of your oven, trying hard not to watch the way your shorts easily ride up, your ass slightly peaking out from the movement.
He swallows before looking away, eyes landing on the bag on the counter.Â
âMhm, I've been trying new stuff ever since I made that pasta for you, I made something for Sunoo the other day and he actually said it was good, like no bullshit.â You say, still looking at what's in the oven.
âThis time, I tried making these like red velvet cheesecake cookies,âÂ
He nods, but speaks up âWell uh, it smells goodâ
You turn around to look at him, tilting your head âYeah, you said thatâ he swallows sudden dryness in his throat.
âRight..â You shake your head before turning off the timer and taking the cookies out of the oven,
âOkay, they have to cool down and stuff for like..â You check your phone, scrolling, â..only ten minutes,â You look up at him, smiling.Â
His eyes fall to the bag on the counter, and yours follow his.
âRight! Okay, so I know you really like Toy Story and all that but also Ramenâ like I saw your ramen cabinet at your place and was honestly shocked, but..â
He tilts his head curiously watching as you pull the packets out of the bag,
âApparently it's some seasonal thing, but I just thought you would like it because buzz lightyears face is literally on itââ You say through a laugh, showing him the Ramen pack.Â
He smilesâgenuinely, something close to guilt pinging in his chest as he takes it from you.
âT-this, this is really nice of youâ He mutters, looking at you. âIt's nothing, reallyâ You say, knowing damn well you nearly chased a worker down at the store in order to get the last pack of them from the back.Â
âThank you,â He whispers, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you close.
You pause for a moment, before wrapping your own arms around him, one of your hands running through his hair.
âOkay, okayâ weren't you the one who insisted that we actually study this time.â You say, peeling back.
He chuckles, hand rubbing the back of his neck, âRightâ um, sorry.âÂ
âItâs okay Hee, I'm just glad you like it..â You say, hand pulling him closer by his waistband, his breath catches in his throat.
âWant a cookie?â you ask, tilting your head, batting your eyelashes innocently at him, in that way you were just looking at him the last time you got on your knees for him.
âCookie?â He questions, voice shakyâ âYes, the cookies I just madeâ You add, as if youâre not the very reason his brain is short circuiting.Â
He makes a noise when your hand trails lower, lightly cupping the half hard length of him inside of his sweatpants.
He nods and you offer a squeeze before peeling your hand back.
He whimpers at the loss, hand reaching out to steady himself on the counter.Â
âOkay,â You say sweetly, moving back towards the oven. He shakes his head, trying to get rid of any irrational thoughts right nowâ
he's here to study, and study only.
And he's not going to let those feelings of doubt cloud his mind either, because it's not true, nothing Clair said is true
âŚright?
â..and they just kept on asking, but I told them I couldnâtâ and that you literally hate parties.â You continue, not paying attention to the work in front of you at all.
He just nods, sort of regretting agreeing to your 10 minute âbrain breakâ idea.
Heâs tried to avoid looking at you this whole timeâ because fuckâyou look good.Â
âI mean, I donât hate them..â He mumbles, picking at the eraser of his pencil.
âOkay, but you donât want to go to one, right?â You ask, legs swung over his lap.
âI wouldnât mind if it was with you thoughâ I like spending time with you..â He clears his throat â..so Iâd be willing to go through that if it means I can be with youâ He says, looking at you.Â
âThats cute,â You note, watching the way his ears flushâ still the same as when he first met you.
âI like spending time with you too, Heeâ You smile, sitting up.
âBut I really donât feel like studying right now..â You whisper, leaning in close, lips ghosting just over his.
âMaybe..â He visibly swallows, âMaybe we can..extend the break then?âÂ
You hum in response, swinging one of your legs over his to straddle his thigh, his hands settle on your hips, grabbing onto the soft flesh.
âY/nââ You silence his words in a kiss, hands resting on his chest, pulling the fabric of his shirt closer.
He moans into your mouth, you take the opportunity to slip your tongue in, him mirroring the action the same way he tried to do last time, but betterâyou pull back to catch your breath but he doesn't let that last for long, his hand coming up to cup the back of your neck, pulling you back onto his lips, earning a surprised gasp from you.Â
You experimentally roll your hips against his thigh, the friction of his sweatpants against your shorts making you even wetter.
His hands roam up and down your back, wanting to feel all at once. You take the opportunity to slip your hand from his chest, palming him over his sweatpantsâ his cock already hard, desperate, and craving your touch.Â
âY/n..â He breathes against your lips, you move your hand to slip it into his waistbandâ
âWaitâ y/n.. Hold onââ He whispers, even as his body leans into the touch.
You respond by kissing just below his jaw, he tilts his head giving you more access,
âHmm?â you hum in response, âI needââ He lets out a low sound when you suck on the most sensitive part of his neckâhis adams apple.Â
âI need to ask you something..â He breathes out â...firstââ You bring your hand lower, just under the elastic of his briefs before his hand leaves your hip and stops it.
âItâ itâs important, I just need to say itââ your lips ghost over his neck, âItâs something Clair told me Iââ You pause over his neck, pulling back to look down at him,Â
âClair?â You question, retracting your hand from his waistband to rest back on his chest.
He nods, âYeahâ you met her at that party, sheâs one of myâŚfriendsâ
You roll your eyes, âWhat did she say?â You question, licking your lips.Â
âI just need to know that itâs not trueâI told her it was ridiculous and that she was lying, but I need you to tell meââ he blinks once, trying to gather the words.
âOkay..â You say, an anxious feeling bubbling in your chest.Â
He breathes out once, âSheâshe told me you were um.. Using me? Which I donât know what you would use me for I meanâ look at you, what could you possibly use me for you know?..â
He continues, not quite looking at you, âShe uh said.. That she overheard you talking with your friendsâ that it was some ego boosting game?â He questions, âI donât knowâ I just, it canât be true right? You wouldnât use the way I feel to feed into thatââ You swallow, your breath catching in your throat
âY-you wouldn't do that, you wouldn't play meâwe have something, right? Y/nââ His chest rises and falls, waiting for you to respondâ waiting for you to deny it, fuck just say something, anything.Â
But that's not trueâ is it? Is that what you were doing the whole time and you were completely unaware, or maybe a part of you was aware of itâ liked it even.
But Heeseung cares about you, he likes you, not just the front you put up, but he likes you.
This Clair girlâ she completely is twisting your words, putting these thoughts in Heeseungs mindâ you knew she liked him, but doing this, fuck you canât even think straight because a part of it almost does feel real
âY/n?â He questions, voice shaky. âT-thats not what this is right?â He asks, searching your face for something to tell him that Clair was lying.
You open your mouth to speakâ but close it when nothing comes out.
âPlease tell me itâs not true..â He breathes out, throat dry.
âHeeââ You start but his hands fall from your hips, he shifts to stand up, leaving you sitting on the couch, legs draped in an awkward position, shorts ridden upâ Â
âI canât believe I let myself actually thinkââ He runs a hand through his hair â..that a girl like you could like meâ fuck, im pathetic.â he whispers to himself, he canât even bring himself to look at you.
âY-youâre not pathetic Heeseungââ Your voice cracks
âNo, I amâim an idiot for actuallyâ I should have known.â He reaches down, grabbing his notebook and pencils from the coffee table.
âLet me explain Hee.. s-sheâs not telling the..â He shoves his stuff in his bag, ears ringingâ he needs to get out of here right now.
He's already humiliated, crying in front of you would just make it worse.
âNo. because you couldnât even deny it when I asked y/nâ you couldnât even make up a lie or anything.â He says, now fully looking at you.Â
âI..I canât do this. I canât be here right nowâ He says, voice breaking. You stand up, reaching out for him but he steps back.
because if you touch him right now, he'll completely break, right here on your living room floor.
âDonât go Heeâ donât.. let me explain,â You donât even care for the way your eyes blur from the tears threatening to fall
He looks away, he canât see you like this.
âYou donât have to worry about your reputation or what people think anymoreâŚIâdonât make me feel any more stupid then I already do..please.â He whispers, lips trembling, you lower your hand to your side, watching him as he walks out, not even slamming the door behind himâinstead, shutting it gently, and somehow it feels even worse.
-
He's avoiding you.
He's been avoiding you for the past few daysâlike actually, no staring at you when you two happen to be in the same room, no random pictures from him showing you the newest addition to his figure collection, nothing.
Just radio silence.Â
Sunoo and Yunjin both give each other a look as you pick at your food with your fork,
âBabes..you havenât actually eaten your food this whole time.â Yunjin says, drawing your eyes up to her.
You blink once, pushing your designer sunglasses up your noseâ a weak attempt in masking how puffy your eyes are.Â
âNot hungryâ You mumble, continuing to poke at your food. âYou just said you were craving itââ Sunoo says, watching you with an almost unbelieving look.
âGuess I was wrongâ You sigh, picking up the tray. âWhere are you going?â Yunjin asks, brow raised. âIâm just going to find something at home. Iâll see you guys laterâ You say, attempting to offer that smile of yours before leaving.
You open your small pantry, looking for something, when your eyes land on it, the ramenâ the specifically designed buzz light year ones that you got for him. Sitting on the shelf, unopened.
Oh he's pathetic huh? You reach in, grabbing it to make something youâll actually eat.Â
Donât do it.
Donât open the messages app. Donât click on his contact, and definitely do not type a message to send.
You: Hey, are we still on for tutoring tomorrow?
This is probably why you should have stayed with Yunjin and Sunoo. You swipe out of the messages, pretending to scroll through social media as you wait for a reply, taking another bite of the surprisingly good ramen. Fuckâhe really does know his stuff.
You swipe back into the messages, watching as the bubbles show up, just to disappear, then show up again.
Hee: I canât, but Iâll set you up with someone else instead
Someone else? Is he serious right now?
You: Is this a joke?
Hee: Im sorry
Hee: I have things to work on myself
There he goes, still apologizing.
You: you canât even face me? Heeseung seriously?
You: can we meet up?
You: let me explain
Hee: Im sorry y/n, im busy
Hee: Youâll get an email of who you will be assigned to
You: I donât want to be assigned to anyone else
You: Iâm not going I donât care
Hee: How will you keep your grade up then?
You: maybe with you tutoring me?
Hee: Y/n, I canât.Â
Hee: Iâm sorry but I just canât be around you right now
You: Im not going unless its you
Hee: I have to go
Hee: I'm sorry, good luck
âFucking hellââ You whisper to yourself, setting your phone face down on the counter. Why does it feel like someone is squeezing your heart right nowâ A dry laugh leaves your throat, void of any amusement.
You swore to yourself, you swore you wouldn't let a boy out of all things make you feel this way.
But low and behold, Lee fucking Heeseung is the one to have you feeling like this on a Wednesday afternoon.
Or maybe it's yourself, maybe it really is your fault, maybe you even deserve this.Â
-
âUhâ what are you doing here?â Jake asks, walking into his and Heeseung's shared apartment.
âWorking on the code for my game,â Heeseung answers, not bothering to look up.
âOh so youâre not watching porn?â Jake asks sarcastically, grabbing water from the fridge.Â
Heeseung looks up, âDudeâ what?â
Jake rolls his eyes, âIm fucking with you, but seriously youâve been acting weird for the past week. Itâs starting to freak me out.â He says, coming around the kitchen counter to look at Heeseung's computer.Â
âAnd for the first time in likeâforever, youâre here on a Thursday, arenât you supposed to be tutoring tooââ Jake starts,
"I'm not doing it anymore.â This time Jake actually pauses, âLike, not tutoring y/nâ The y/n, like the sane girl youâre obsessed with?â He questions, unbelieving.
âEveryone was right about her. A girl like her wouldn't actually be interested in me. I should have listened but I was stupid, and.. And greedy.â
He squeezes his eyes shut. âAnd I treated Clair like shit over itâ I called her a liar, Im an asshole.â Heeseung swears, shutting his computer and rubbing his hand over his face.Â
âClair huh?â Jake says, sitting down. âYâknow, she actually asked me if you were going to that party tomorrow.â
Heeseung looks up, âWhatâd you say?âÂ
âI said you hated parties, but Iâd still mention it because I know damn well being in here, sulking isnât going to help at all.â Jake admits, standing up.
âAnd you kind of look like shit right nowâ how many hours of sleep did you get last night anywayââ he starts, observing his face.
Heeseung looks away, âFine, ill go. But the second I hate it I'm leaving and coming back here to play league.â He says, crossing his arms.
âYeah, yeahâ I'll just make sure you donât hate it.â He says, a too proud smirk on his face.
-Â
Jake claps him on the shoulder too hard, âLoosen up man, itâs fridayââ Heeseung runs a hand through his hair, looking around at the sea of bodies all together in some frat house.
âYeah, a friday I could be spending getting my rank in league higher. yâknow people actually get paid sometimes for itââ Jake gapes at him,
âSee, this is why we needed to get you out. LookâI love that game and all, but you need to live a little, especially after the shit that went down with you know who.â He makes a face at the last words.Â
Heeseung pauses, âWaitâ you donât think she's gonna be here tonight.. Right?â He swallows, looking aroundâscanning the crowd.
âDonât worry about her, just get a drinkâ plus, im pretty sure Clair was looking for you..â
Panic bubbles in his chest, âI feel like I shouldnât talk to herâ I mean she probably doesn't even want to talk to me.â Heeseung says, rambling on as Jake guides him to the makeshift bar in the kitchen.
Jake just nods along, pouring himself and Heeseung a drink and handing it to him.
âWhats this?â Heesueng asks, smelling the contents in the cup. âSomething that will make you a whole lot less anxious,â Jake says through a laugh.Â
Heeseung swallows, throat dryâ maybe this is what he needs, a break. Something to help him disassociate from his brain for a little bit, get away from the overthinking.
He takes the cup without another word, downing whatever his friend put together. âAlrightâ that works too.â Jake says, sipping his own drink. Â
And that's how Heeseung got here now, oversized hoodie discarded somewhere in the house, laughing with Jake and some guys he introduced him to.
Actually sort of fitting in, and this time he doesnât feel like some outsider. What would you think though? Seeing him like thisâ in a world you're so familiar with.Â
Even though the music is loud, the room a bit crowded, the crisp night air from outside lingering in, doing little to mask the smell of alcohol and sweat, they looked..relaxed.
âYou ever smoked before?â Sunghoon, the tall guy who he can now put a name to says, taking the joint from Jakes fingers.Â
He hesitates for a second, Jake glancing at him giving him that questioning look, âNot really.â Heeseung admits, Sunghoon nods,
âYou donât have to if you donât want to.â He says casually, âThis shits pretty strongâmy boy Jay got it for us,â Sunghoon says, nudging his friend's shoulder.Â
Heeseung exhales, looking around the room once again, this is his choiceâ âNah, its fineâ Heeseung says, reaching out for it âIâll try it.â
Jake's eyebrows raise at that âHell yeah, this is what I meant by loosening up man,âÂ
âJust donâtââ Jake says too late, the first inhale is a mistake, his throat burns, he turns away immediately as his friends start laughing â-rush.â
âIm fineââ Heeseung manages to say in between coughs âIm goodâ itâs good.âÂ
âYou sure? You look like youâre dyingââ Jay says with a grin on his face. âIâm not dyingâ itâs just, strong.â Heeseung says, âThat's how yâknow it's good.â Jay adds, He hands it back to Sunghoon, shaking his head to reset himself.Â
He takes another sip of his drink, the alcohol already helping with making things feel lighter, â..I donât really feel anything.â He says, leaning over to Jake. âGive it a second,â His friend says with a smirk.Â
And then he feels the shift, not all at onceâ but just enough to know that they weren't lying when they said it was strong.
The loud rap song on the speaker fades, like it's further away now. His shoulders relax as he exhales slowly, â..damn.â Heeseung mutters, âWhat?â Jake whispers.
Heeseung cracks a smile, subtle. âNothing. I justâ itââ He blinks once, he canât put it into words, but somehow everything does feel lighter. Like the tension that's been in his body for the past week is just..gone.
âYou good?â Sunghoon asks, an amused grin on his face. âYeah,â Heeseung nods, leaning back against the wall. âIâm good.âÂ
âHeeseung?â His eyes follow the voice, Clair.
âOh, heyââ He says, turning his attention towards her rather than the group, earning a side eye from Jake before he goes back to talking.
âYou made it..â She says, almost sounding relieved. âYeah, I uhâ look,â He breathes, âI wanted to apologize for how I acted the other day, because youââ He looks down at his feet, âI think you were right, and I shouldn't haveââ
She interrupts him âIts fine Heeseung, I forgive you.â Something flashes in her eyes, âIâm just glad we donât have to worry about her anymore,â She says, smiling up at him.
Worry about her? He questions to himself, but shakes his headâmind already fuzzy.
âBabe, you donât have to worry. Use tonight to finally relax, you love parties remember?â Yunjin says, smile bright on her face. Sunoo checks his reflection in his phone camera as you three approach said party.
âI donât knowâ I really feel like I need to think about the stuff with Heeseung, he's probably sitting at home alone, I just feel bad and I never got the chance to tell himââ You continue on as you enter the house.Â
Sunoo cuts you off, âI donât think you have much to worry about.â Your eyes follow his, landing on Heeseung.
Laughing with a group, drink in hand, and none other than that fucking girl who canât keep your name out of her mouthâpractially glued to his side. You feel the heat rush to your face, âShitââ Yunjin says, giving Sunoo a look, he shrugs.Â
âY/n, we can leave now if you wantââ She starts, giving you a worried look,
âNo,â You say bluntly, grabbing yourself a drink. âIâd seriously rather not,â You watch as he runs a hand through his hair, laughing at something Sunghoon said.Â
âWe should say Hi,â You look at Sunoo and Yunjin, smiling. Except it doesn't quite meet your eyes. âAre you sure that's a good ideaââ Sunoo says through a laugh, âOkay, nevermind she's going.â
âLook who finally decided to show her pretty face,â One of the guys says, you donât even know who it is, because all youâre focused on is Heeseungâs face when he sees you.
Yunjin and Sunoo come behind you, greeting everyone else. You haven't even looked at Clair once, no point in wasting time on a liar like her.
Your eyes land on the joint in between his fingers that Sunghoon just passed him, âYou smoke now?â You ask, tilting your head. His eyes travel back up to your face immediately, not even aware of how obvious he was with it.
âIâ Noââ You look down at his hand, he swallows, âI justââ You hum in response, lifting his hand on your own, bringing it to your mouth.
His lips fall open slightly as you inhale, slow, practiced, even though you haven't smoked in forever.Â
âDamn,â One of the guysâpresumebly Jay says, watching the scene. Sunoo chuckles, shaking his head knowingly.
âSo you like parties now?â You ask, he looks down at your lips, watching as they moveâ fuck heâs not even listenting right now.Â
âHuh?â He asks, blinking once. âI asked if you like parties now,â You repeat, ignoring the glare the girl beside him is giving you.
âI mean, I donâtâ Jake dragged me here.â He says, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. You watch as Clair tugs on the short sleeve of his plain white shirt, you mask the surprise at thatânormally it would be some band or animated character on it.
He looks at her for a split second and she leans up to whisper something in his ear.
âWhat was that?â You ask, âY/nââ Heeseung starts but Clair interrupts him. âI was saying, you need to leave him alone.â She says, and you scoffâ looking at her, Jake's eyes look between the three of you like he canât believe what's going on. You donât even care who's looking at this point either.
âHeâs a big boy, he can speak for himself.â You say, not sparing her a glance.
âCan you not be such a bitch for like five secondsââ This time he looks at her, already taking a step back,
âOh, Iâm the bitch? Iâm not the one who twisted my words into something just so you could be on his good side.â You say, the accusation makes her freeze.
âYou donât deserve himââ She starts,
âPlease, stop.â Heeseung says, you look at himâthe anxiousness in his slightly red eyes. She still continues, âStop!â He nearly yells, way louder than intended, his ears going red at the heads that turn.Â
âY/nâ can we please just..talk outside, maybe?â He asks, you shake your head, a dry chuckle leaving your throat. âYou seem pretty occupied Heeseung.â He opens his mouth to speak but closes it when you walk away, disappearing down the same hall your friends wandered off to a little bit before that.Â
âFuck..â He whispers to himself, regretting whatever amount he drank, and most of all whatever the fuck he smoked. âI need toââ He pauses, closing his eyes for a second, â-I need to go talk to her, I cantââ He looks down at the girl beside him,
âIs it true?â He asks, genuine hurt in his expression, âIs what true?â She swallows, âYou, twisting her wordsâ did you lie to me?â He asks, searching her face for something honest. âIââ
The hesitation is enough.Â
The next words that leave her mouth are muffled by the sound of the insufferable music playing on the speakers, and overlapping voices of people talking and shouting. He doesnât even know where he's going, he doesnât know what he's doingâwhat he's going to say to you when he sees you, âY/n?â He shouts, knocking on a closed door, when no one replies he moves on,Â
He's said the words âExcuse meâ and âSorryâ over ten times in the last five minutes, pulling his phone out of his pocket, texting you would make total sense rightâdead. Of course his phone is dead right now, out of any time.
This is what he gets for playing geometry dash for the first 30 minutes here.Â
Who the hell can even afford a house this big anyway while also being a college student. He doesnât even bother knocking anymore, immediately regretting it when he walks in on a guy who, if he's not mistaken, had two girls in the bed with him, his face going red immediately before yelling a âShit I-imâ Sorry!â and slamming the door shut.
You check yourself in the mirror one more time before opening the door, only to see none other than Lee Heeseung already standing there. Hand reached out to open the door, he brings it back to his side awkwardly, âHiââ You raise a brow, âHi.âÂ
Why didnât he fucking rehearse this? âDid you umâ How was the tutoring?â He asks, shifting on his feet.
You chuckle dryly, âI didnât go.â You say plainly, his face changes to concern. âYou need the tutoring thoughâ your grade..âÂ
âAnd youâre seriously talking to me about tutoring right now?â He shakes his head âSorryâ Iâm just..â He sighs, "I'm really nervous right now, I canâtââ He breathes out, âI donât like how we left thingsâ how I left things.âÂ
âYouâve been avoiding me for days.â You state, trying to keep your voice that steady tone. âI know, I knowâ it was stupid of me, I shouldn't haveâwhere are you going?â You move past him, âIâm not talking about this in the middle of a house party.âÂ
âPlease Y/nââ
âSo are you coming or not?â He doesn't hesitate before following after you, looking down at your phone as you send your friends a text he doesnât have enough time to read. You ignore the looks as you and Heeseung make your way to the front door,Â
âI shouldnât have avoided you like that.â He says, falling into step beside you. Cursing himself for forgetting his hoodie, but no way was he going back in there when he had you right here.Â
When you donât say anything he continues, âI justâ I was confused when you hesitated, when I asked you about the whole thing..â He says quieter, looking at your side profile under the streetlights.
âAbout me using you?â His steps falter for a moment, âYeah, that.â
âI honestly think I was an idiotâI mean, expecting you out of all people to actually like a guy like me.â He chuckles at the thought, âHeeââ You pause on the sidewalk, âIââ You look up at him, âI should have been honest with youâ I shouldn't have hesitated when I knew it wasnât trueâ but I did say some things..â
You watch his face for a reaction âIt's just, your attention felt different to me, like you actually liked me, not just the surface level either and I justâ I guess I thrived off of it in a way?â You cringe at the idea,
âAnd I regret it.. I regret it so much Heeseung.â You donât even register the first tear that slips out until his hand comes up to your face immediately to wipe it away, âShhh, donât cryâdonât,â He breaths, retracting his handâ because he doesnât deserve to touch you.
âI donât regret anything we did though,â You clarify, looking up at him, he turns away, continuing to walk beside you, âIâm sorry,â He whispers, you look at him confused, "I'm sorry for being a coward, f-for walking out on you.âÂ
âIm sorry for not being honest with you Heeseungâ because I like you, a lot. Probably way more than I should, and definitely more than I thought.â You say, a dry chuckle leaving your throat.
âI like your stupidly perfect hair even after you run your hands through it every secondâ I like how youâre so open about your interests even if some people think itâs weird, I think your toy story fascination is really funny and cute actually, and I like that I can actually be myself around you..âÂ
âI hate that I made you doubt any of that.â
He pauses in front of you, looking past your shoulder at your apartment complex. âY/nââ He starts, but you shake your head, âYou donât have to reply to me nowâ â He takes a step forward
âLook y/nâ I really, really want you in my lifeâ I know it might be selfish but I just.. I canât let you go.â He takes a surprising step closer, âAnd I understand if you donât want toâbut, can we at least be friends?âÂ
What the fuck?Â
Friends? Seriously? You just practically poured your heart out, and heâs talking about friends! Did you mis-read the situation?
âFriends?â You ask, searching his face, He nods, waiting for an answer. You close your eyes for a moment before looking at him again, âOkay, friends.â
He lets out a relieved sound before pulling you into an embrace, youâre caught off guard, hands awkwardly at your sides before you lift them slowly to wrap around his body.Â
âWe can put the..stuff that happened in the past tooââ
No! A part of you wants to scream, push him back, tell him that's not what you wantâthat you donât get jealous over something as stupid as a guy, and yet here you are.Â
âI.. Okayâ You nod against his chest, he pulls back, hands braced on your shoulders, and heâs smilingâactually fucking smiling. âI can walk you up to your apartmentââ he starts,
âNo,â You quickly say, and yesâ because you need a moment to think about what the fuck youâre doing, and because you donât know what youâll do if youâre in his presence for another five minutes.Â
You chuckle awkwardly, âNoâLike, Iâm fineâreally, I can do it myself,â His hands come to his sides, âOkay! um, greatâ He nods, âText me when youâre up there thenâshit nevermind, my phone kind of died at the party, I was playing geometry dash for like the first thirtyââ
He watches your expression â-Sorry, im rambling againâ I should probably go.â He rubs the back of his neck, âHeeseung.â You say, bringing his attention back to you, âYouâre not going back to the party right?â
He shakes his head immediately, âI was just going to go back to my place anywaysâ I think I've had enough of the âparty lifeâ for one night,â He says through a laugh. you nod, slightly relieved before offering a tight smile, âGood,â he lifts his hand to waveâ that awkward one that used to make you cringe, but now, you canât help but find it adorable. He doesnât leave until youâre inside of the building.
-
â..No fucking wayââ Jake says mid laugh, right in Heeseungs face. âI justâ I didnât know what to do, or say, so that's why I did it.â Heeseung murmurs, running through the code for his game once again.Â
âYeah, well it was a stupid moveâI mean, you, out of all people, being friends with Y/n.â He laughs again, âSeriously its fucking comedicâ Heeseung finally looks up, âWhats that supposed to mean?âÂ
âDude, im just sayingâ sheâs not the kind of girl you can just be friends with, especially you.â His eyes fall to Heeseung's monitor, âHoly shitâ itâs turning out good, you think itâll be ready by Saturday?â He says, changing the topic.Â
Heeseung shakes his head, âYeah I just have to run through it a few more times, Itâs still a bit choppy.â Jake chuckles, âAlright, let me know if you need any helpâ I know im not participating in it professionally and all but I still do this for fun yâknow.â Heeseung nods, mind still replaying his other words.Â
He can totally be friends with you! Who cares if he has had a crush on you for months, who cares if he almost actually had youâ like really had you. Friends make sense, obviously. No complicated feelings justânormal, like nothing happened..right?
âWait,â Jake says, leaning in closerâwatching as a new screen pops up, a character model loading in. A little rough around the edges, but itâs the most detailed one he's shown so far.
Heeseung pauses, finger hovering over his mouse, âWhatââ , âWhy does she look familiar?â Jake asks, brow raised.
Heeseung stills for a moment before shrugging, âNah, she doesnâtâ He resorts casuallyâat least attempting to. âShe does.â Jake counters back,
âSheâs quite literally just a character,â Heeseung says through a chuckle. âYeah, with a specific attitude, faceâbody.â Heeseung rolls his eyes, âYouâre reaching right now.â
Jake laughs, standing up, âThe hair, really? Pink?â Heeseung looks at his screen again, âItâs just a design choice.â He simply says. âYou sure itâs not just a distraction, so people donât recognize who it actually looks like?â
Heeseung scoffs, âItâs not even based on anyone.â Jake nods, unconvinced, âRight..totally random.â Heeseung squeezes his eyes shut for a moment, â..Itâs just a lot easier to design a character when you have a reference,â he mutters quietly.
Jake smirks, âYeah, and you picked her.â He doesnât answer that.Â
âDoes she know?â Jake asks skeptically. âOf course she knows!â Heeseung says defensively,
âIt was just before the whole..thing happened.â He says, fidgeting with the scroll wheel on his mouse. âWell shit, you canât change it nowââ
Heeseung groans, âYeah, I gathered that.â He waits for Jake to leave his room before picking up his phone immediately.
Heeseung: hey, sorry if this is random
You: Itâs notÂ
Hee: Oh, okay
Hee: Well it's about my game
You: ???
Heeseung: I understand if you donât feel comfortable with me using you as a model for one of the characters
You: What?
You: Heeseung, I donât mind
Hee: Are you sure? I donât want it to be weird or anything
You: Why would it be weird?
You: didnât we agree on being friends
You: Friends help each other out, yk
Hee: Sorry
Hee: I'm just really tired
Hee: I've been working on this for hours already today
You: :(
You: Can I help in any way
Hee: you still want to help me?
You: Yes lol
Hee: Actually, if youâre not busy right now could you send me a picture of yourself
Hee: Sorry that sounds creepy
Hee: Its for the game, I want to get your features right
God he's patheticâ he has plenty of pictures of you on his phone already. He bites his lip, watching as the bubbles show up, then disappear.Â
âFuckââ He whispers, opening the image you sent him. Itâs nothing explicit or revealing, its just youâ a real time selfie, lying in bed, the warm lighting in your room casting subtle shadows on your face.
You: Is that okay?
Heeseung: Its perfect
Heeseung: the picture isÂ
Heeseung: I mean you are too sorry
Heeseung: but it works
You canât help the laugh that escapes your throat, imagining his face right now. Godâimagine how heâd react to nudes.
You: haha thanks
Hee: would u be okay stopping by the computer lab tmrw? Not for long or anything I don't want to bore you, just because I want to get the finishing touches
You: yeah sure i donât mind :)
Hee: Thanks y/n, i really appreciate it
You like the message before you say anything stupidâresisting the urge turning the conversation into something youâd probably regret in the morning. Friends, rightâ that's it. Youâre totally fine with that, this is what friends do!
-
This is seriously the one place where you canât seem to fit in. And of course, it's exactly where Heeseung thrives. You walk down the narrow aisle, once again trying to ignore the looks you get. Heeseung knows you finally came from the way Jake stops speaking and looks behind him slightly shocked.Â
âHey,â You smileâor at least attempt to. âHi,â He says, looking up at you. Band t-shirt, and jeans baggy on his frame in an intentional way.
You stare at each other for a moment, he blinksâ âRightâ um, you can sit here,â He says, pulling out the empty seat next to him. You nod, setting your bag on the ground.
Jake shakes his head, a smug smile on his face as he continues working. âI didnât interrupt anything rightââ
âNo!â Heeseung says a little too loud. âI meanâ no, you came perfectlyâ here, like you came on time.â Jake attempts to stifle a laugh beside him.
He clears his throat, âSorry, I'm just..stressed, Iâve been preparing this for months and I really donât want to mess it up.â You nod, âItâs okay Hee, you're like really good at this stuff so im sure its amazing already.â He smiles, genuinely, âItsâ I..thanks,âÂ
âI can show you what it looks like so far?â He clicks some buttons youâre not quite sure what they doâ âHoly shit,â You watch his screen,
âHeeseung, you made this?â He nods, rubbing the back of his neck, âYeah, like I said it still needs some more work but I have a few more days.âÂ
âThis is like one of those professional gamesâ I honestly donât really know much about this stuff but this isâlegit.â He bites his lip, smile peaking through. âYou mean it?â He asks, watching youâre face as you look at his monitor, âYeahâyeah, I really do,â
âCan I see the character inspired by me?â You ask, nudging his leg with your foot, an action he still canât find himself getting used to. His finger hovers over the mouse, âNot yet..â You tilt your head,
âI was actually hoping you wouldâmaybe want to come to the event on Saturday?â He visibly swallows, âI justâ you donât have to or anything, I understand if youâre busy but I do really want you there and um, your support means a lot to me,â He says, the last words fading into something only you can hear.
âIâll be there,â You say, hand coming down to rest on his knee- casually, like itâs normal, which it should be since your uh..friends?
He looks down at your hand, before making eye contact again, âAre you sureâ like positive? I donât want you to feel forced, and you can bring your friends if you want toâ actually I donât know, I donât want to make a fool of myself..â He rambles on, doing that thing where his words come out faster than his brain can process it.
You laugh, a small soundâhe pauses, looking at you again, âIâll ask them if they can, okay?â He nods, âDonât stress so much, those gaming CEO guys would be stupid not to invest in something like this,â You say, gesturing to his screen, your hand absent mindedly rubbing small circles on his leg.
His hand comes down to rest on yours, squeezing gently. And in that moment where his skin meets yoursâ you swear the whole room disappears.
The looks you can sense youâre getting from Clair, the sounds of the other students talking about whatever codeâthingy theyâre working on. âThank you, itâ it really means a lot to me.âÂ
Your phone buzzes in your pocket, onceâtwice. âI should probably go, my uh class itâs, yeah.â He retracts his hand quickly, nodding three times,
âRightâ yeah, sorry.. I donât want you to be late or anything.â He chuckles, almost nervously. âYeah that would be bad huh?â You say, quirking a smile.
âIâll um, Iâll text you more details about it,â Heeseung mutters, watching you pick up your bag.
âIâll answer,â You say pushing in the chair, âY-yeah, see you later y/nââ You smile one more time before leaving, heart racing at a concerning speed- not only because of the interaction but because it was with Heeseung, the guy you told yourself was your friendâ the one you were trying so hard to convince over.
âOkay what the hell was thatââ Jake says, eyeing his friend, âWhat was what?â Heeseung questions, chuckling,
âThat whole..pathetic act thing.â He says, gesturing to Heeseung. âI donât know what youâre talking about.â
Jake laughs, âManâitâs just both of you huh?â Heeseung shakes his head before turning back to his monitor.
Yeah, whatever that means, anyways what he really needs to focus on is finishing this upâ after all this is probably a once in a lifetime opportunity.Â
-
Heeseungs been busy all week, specifically with finishing up the programming dynamicsâ or whatever it was he said.
Yet he still offered to make you a video explaining what was happening in your physics class, mostly because you refused to be tutored by anyone else besides him. A part of him felt prideful when you admitted that actually.
The event was being held in the nicer part of the University, a sort of auditorium type of building.
And yet here he is, in the dimly lit computer lab, trying to make sure everything runs perfectly once again. He canât afford a fuck up, not when hes been waiting for this for so long.Â
Jake: dude where are u
Jake: profs looking for u
Jake: u better not be second guessing this
Heeseung: i just wanted to make sure it ran smoothly
Heeseung: im coming back
Jake: hurry up
Jake: y/ns here
Jake: shes asking where you are
Jake: shes walking towards me
Jake: oh shit
âWhere's Heeseung?â you ask the boy who you know as Jake, Heeseung's best friend. âHes uhââ You raise a brow,
âHe's in the computer lab, heâs nervous as shit right now and he thinks going through it again is going to help.â You nod, of course he would be.Â
Jake looks back down at his phone before typing a quick message
Jake: Good luck
You open the door to the computer lab quietly, the only screen on being towards the front of the room, bright in the dim lighting.
Hes standing up, leaning against the desk, wearing a..suit jacket? âHee?â You question, walking down the row, he turns to you, surprise etched across his features.Â
âY/nâ you came..â He says, looking down at your outfit for a split second, a short summer dress that compliments you a bit too well, he swallows, hand hovering over the mouse.
âOf course I did,â You reply, now standing in front of him. âYouâre..pretty dressed up,â You note with a smile. He looks down at his outfit, âIs it too much? I wanted to wear something that would make them take me seriouslyâ yâknow what I mean?â He says, smoothing down the black blazer. âHeeseung.âÂ
His eyes fall on you again, âYes?â he says quietly. âYou look good, okay?â He nods, âMaybe just lose the blazer..â He stifles a laugh âSee, I knew it was too much,â
He shakes his head, smile on his face as he unbuttons it, leaving him with a white button up instead. âBetter?â He asks, looking for your approval, âMuch better.â
His eyes search yours for a moment, âI'm really glad you showed up,â He says, biting his lip out of pure nervous habit, yet you canât help the way your eyes fall to the action.
You clear your throat, âI brought something for youâ I was going to wait till after but maybe it would help cool your nerves.â You say, pulling something out of your bag.
âOkay before you say anythingâ Sunoo is like really good at finding all this underground stuff and this guy was selling these and I know you were talking about it a few weeks ago..â He tilts his head, amusement spread across his features,
âWho's rambling now?â You roll your eyes, âShut up and close your eyes or I'm not giving it to you.â He raises his hands instantly, âAlrightâ alright, sorry,â You grab his hand, placing the box in it.Â
He chuckles âWhat is thisââ , âOpen,â You watch his face, the surprise spreading, âHolyââ He smiles, âY/n, how did youââ You attempt to hide your own smile, biting your lip.
He looks at the limited addition Toy Story figurine closer, âDo youâ do you know how rare this is? Only 500 were made in 1999ââ
Right.. Because of course he would know that. He laughs, disbelieving âYouâre incredible, seriouslyây/n I..â He doesnât think twice before wrapping his arms around you, youâre caught off guard at first, one of your hands trailing up to run through the back of his hair, his face buried in the crook of your neck.
You donât know if youâre just feeling things but you swear he planted a small kiss just between your shoulder blade and neck, He pulls back, "I'm really happy youâre here,â He says, turning off the monitor and falling into step beside you.
You watch Heeseung from the crowd, hand clutched tight around the strap of your bag as he talks off to the sideâwith Clair. Why the hell is she touching his armâ He looks past her shoulder, spotting you in the crowd, a small smile quirking on his lips before he waves. Your face softens before waving back,Â
âI was talking to the developers and they were describing the concepts they were looking forâHeeseung, your game fits right into it.â Jake says, Clair opens her mouth to say something but Heeseung doesnât even realize he's blocking it out. âOkayâ I can do this.â He nods, smoothing down the front of his button up.
He looks around the room at the people sitting down, a mix of students, professors, people from the Gaming development club. Jake watches the worried expression on his face as his eyes land on the front row, the developersâ big time CEOâs with their notebooks out, laptops open. âHeyâyouâre good..just donât pass out,â Jake says with a laugh
âThatâs helpful.â Heeseungs mutters, wiping his sweat clad hands on his jeans before stepping onto the wide stage, standing behind the podium.
He takes a deep breath, signaling Jake to put the game on the large screen behind him. âHi everyoneâ my name is Heeseung, so..this is my game I developed.âÂ
He tries not to cringe at his own voice, âSo, itâs actually more narrative driven rather than pre set choices,â He pauses for a moment, âWhatever decisions the player makesâ that's what would affect the character in real time,â He says, his voice carrying a tad bit more enthusiasm.
This is what he knows, this is what he's good at, he picks up the remote on the podium moving onto the next slide, showing the actual game play, the code, what he created on his laptop now being shared in front of a room full of people. âI programmed the system to keep track of the patterns and players choices,âÂ
He's using his hands to exaggerate nowâa thing he does when he's truly passionate about something. You canât help the smile that plays on your face.
He continues, talking about how the games programming, the code, and a few of the developers lean forward, he swallows, trying not to think too deeply.
His character designs come on the screen next, hushed whispers around you, âHow does someone even design thatââ A guy next to you says, âLook how detailed the one on the left isââ A girl whispers.Â
He looks at the screen before searching the crowd for you, clearing his throat, âThe character designs are actually still in progress but I wanted to focus on them feeling realâ throughout the gameplay especially, whether it's a fight scene, a task, you name it.âÂ
Your eyes fall to the developers at the front of the room, nodding, taking notes. Itâs silent for a moment until a voice cuts through, one of the developers speaks up, âWalk us through the character tracking system again,â He saysâ Heeseung nods, this means they're interested,Â
âYeahâokay,â You watch Heeseung get into his element, itâs like the room loosens up as he continues, some people from the crowd raising their hands to ask questions, even compliments directly from the developers. But there's still a tightening feeling in your chest, in the way youâre here supporting himâbut as nothing more than a friend.
Itâs places like these that youâre not really sure what to do, you watch as Heeseung talks to a few other students, low and beholdâwith Clair by his side. He searches the room for a moment, but is interrupted when a man in a very nice suit comes up to him,Â
âLee Heeseung?â He questions, Heeseung nods, âYes sir, that would be me,â He says with an almost nervous smile on his face, âI wanted to give you my card, your game has potentialâ I mean that truly, and I think you could go places with creativity like that,â The man says, Heeseung reaches out for the card, looking down at it for a moment, âWaitâ EN Capital? Thisâ youâre one of the biggest developers in the countryââ Heesueng states, eyes wide,
The man nods, âItâs not everyday we scout someone like this Heeseung, so please, take into consideration giving us a call,â
Heeseung nods, âSirâ yes, Iâll definitely be callingââ He says through a disbelieving chuckle. The man nods with a smile on his face before reaching out to shake Heeseung's hand, âIâm excited to see how you progress.â
Heeseung looks around the large room again, â..fucking genius dude, I swear.â Jake says, the words completely blanking in Heeseung's mind,
âWhere's y/n?â He says outloud, Jake raises a brow, âOne of the most prestigious gaming developers in the country just told you to quote âgive him a callâ and youâre wondering where the girl who pretty much broke your heart is?â Jake questions,Â
Heeseung opens his mouth to speak, but shakes his head, âI need to find herâ I invited her,â Heeseung mutters, âShe went outsideâ Jake says, nodding towards the door. Heeseung's eyes follow the motion. âIâll um.. Iâll be right backâ Heeseung mumbles, moving past Jake, âDude what aboutââÂ
Heeseung makes his way out the room, looking around for youâY/nââ He calls out, you let go of the door you were just about to walk out of, turning towards him,
âHey,â You say with a smile, âWhere are you going?â He asks, walking up to you. âI was going to head back, I didnât want to like interrupt or anything,â
âYou could never,â He says, watching your face, âYou seemed pretty occupied though, not just with the developers..â He tilts his head, âOccupied with who?â He tests, searching your eyes,
âI dunnoâ.. Clairâ He smiles, âWhat?â You say defensively, âNoâ nothing, nothing,â He says, a laugh escaping his lips.
âItâs justâare you jealous?â He asks, âI..what?â He nods, humming in response. âIâm notâstop laughing!â You say, slapping his arm lightly.Â
âHeeseungââ You nearly roll your eyes, actually no, you do roll your eyes as Clair approaches him. You watch as people begin to file out of the auditorium. Her eyes land on you for a split second, âWe were all gonna go hang out at my place to celebrate and everything, do you wannaââÂ
âNoââ He says too quickly, âI meanâ I just, Iâm really tired and uh..â He looks at you for a moment, âIm busyâ you watch the disappointment across her face.
âHeeseung, if you want to you can..â You say, low enough for him to hear. âNo, I want to be with you tonightâ I mean right now, like I want to spend time with youâ He runs a hand through his hair,
âLook, maybe some other time,â He says to Clair, she scoffs before walking past the both of you. Jake comes up a few moments later, âWeâre doing something after if you wanna join, ill text the address,â He says, giving Heeseung his bag, âIâll let yâknow,â Jake shrugs before walking out.Â
Heeseung turns his full focus back to you âI can walk you back to your place if you would like?â He says, clearing his throat. You nod, âI would like that,â
He smiles before falling into step beside you. âYâknow, Iâm really happy you came tonightâ I know I said it already but you probably donât go to things like that for fun,â He says through a chuckle
You nod, "I've seen how hard youâve worked on it Hee, plus its the least I can do for you tutoring me and all,â He glances down at you,
âI think you repaid me enough for the lessonsâ He pauses, âLike- with your kindness not theââ He closes his eyes for a moment, âNot the other thingâ even though yes it was definitely good, I mean I still think about..â He stops, âSorryâfuck, Y/n please just tell me to shut up.â He cringes at his words,
You canât help the smile that plays on your face, âWhy? Itâs kind of cuteâÂ
Thank god you donât look up to notice the embarrassing shade of red his ears are right now. He pauses once he gets in front of your building, hands awkwardly in the pockets of his jeans. âSoâŚ.â
âDo you want to come in?â You ask abruptly, catching him off guard. âL-like inside your apartment?â He asks, unsure.
You nod once, âJust likeâI have that ramen, the one with buzz lightyear on it.âÂ
Your hand tightens around the strap of your bag. â..I honestly thought you would have gotten rid of thatâ He says, searching your face. You shake your head, âI couldn't," You say quietly, and a little bit more shy than intended. âOkayâ um, yeah I would love to come in then,â He nods, following you.Â
And he means it when he says heâll never get over the way it smells exactly like you in here. He takes off his dress shoes, placing them neatly against your wall by the front door, next to your platformed sandals that you kicked off casually.Â
He leans against your counter as you reach up into your cabinet, his eyes trying to avoid the way your already short dress rides up even higher on your exposed legs. Your hand pauses mid air before you bring it back down to your side, âDo you need helpââ
âHeeseung.â You turn to fully face him, he pauses mid sentence, âYeaâYeah?â He questions, clearing his throat. âAre we seriously about to make ramen right now?â He rubs the back of his neck âI mean-I thought that's what we were doing..â His words catch in his throat when you close the distance.
His eyes fall to your lips and you smirk, âWhat are you thinking about right now then?â He visibly swallows, licking his own lips instinctively
âJust how good they would tasteââ He blinks once, â..The ramenâhow good the ramen would taste.â He says, clearing his throat. You hum in response, eyes dropping just below his waistband, he catches that easily. âYeah? Just the ramen huh?â You say, that familiar teasing tone in your voice that he hasnât heard for far too long.
âIâ What are you doing..â He breathes out, trying to calm the rapid pace of his heartbeat even as you step closer, âYou havenât thought about thisâ about us recently?â You tilt your head, watching his face for a reaction.
âOf course I have!â He says quickly, âIâ y/n itâs all I could fucking think about, just you, touching me, talking to meâlike actually telling me about things..â He lets out a chuckle, almost disbelieving, like he wasnât planning on admitting this, which to be fair he wasn't.Â
âDo you know how long I've wanted you?â He asks, you nod âSince the tutoringââ He shakes his head, a small smile on his lips,
âNo, econ, 4th row. You were wearing that long sleeve and jeans that fit you perfectly, and I remember you had asked me if I always talk like my brain moved too fast,â He laughs at the memory, â...and you had said almost every day,â you finish for him.
âI know you try to be perfect y/nâ I know the expectations you have for yourself, and I know that it leaves no room to actually breathe,â He doesnât know where this is coming fromâ but then again, he always talks before his brain processes what he's saying,
âbecause I have those same expectations for myselfâ I mean, I'm not as good at it as you but I do.â He sighs, âBut when I'm with youâ it's different and I guess I was hoping it was the same for youââ
His words are immediately cut off when your lips press against his, your right hand pulling at the collar of his shirt. His eyes flutter shut, melting into you completely, his hands are hesitantâunsure as they come to rest on your waist. You don't pull back far, just enough to whisper âit is the same for me Heeâ I always felt it I just.. I guess I didnât think I deserved it.â
He presses a small kiss to the corner of your lips, âWell if it means somethingâ I think you do..â you laugh softly, raking your other hand through his soft hair.Â
âYou still want that ramen?â You ask teasingly, he shakes his head quickly âNoâno definitely not I want this, here,â He says confidently, you tilt your head, your hand that was on his collar moving lower skimming over his toned chest, cupping the firm bulge of him through his jeans. His eyebrows furrow together at the contact, âHee, donât tell me youâre hard just from a little kiss?â You say with a smirk,
He shakes his head, eyes shutting for a moment, âI canât help itââ He whispers pathetically. You squeeze the bulge and his mouth falls open,
âGosh.. I seriously donât understand how you just walk around with a dick this big everyday like itâs nothing,â his face reddens at how filthy your words are.
âFeel how bad I want you right now,â You say, grabbing his hand from your waist, he complies, letting you guide his hand between your legs, he lets out a broken sound when his palm fully cups you.Â
You grind down on his palm once, his dick throbs at the contactâthe way he can feel you soaking through the thin fabric of your underwear. You hike your dress up so you can move your underwear to the side, exposing yourself to him completely, âFuckââ He curses, his finger tips brushing through your folds experimentally. You moan at the contactâ uncontrolled and all for him,
âJust like thatâ Hee..â You brace your hands on his shoulders when his fingertip grazes your clit, âRight there?â He asks curiously, a part of him needing to get this right because he needs to make you feel good.
You nod, biting your lip when he experimentally squeezes your clit between his index and middle finger, making you even more wet,
He chuckles, âIt'sâ itâs kind of hard because it's so wetâ He notes, the pad of his finger tips teasing your hole unknowingly.
Your cheeks heat in embarrassment, he notices âI like itâ He says, watching your face morph into pleasure, âWhyâwhy are you so good at this?â You breathe out,
âI use my fingers a lotâfor like typing and stuff, coding yâknow?â You moan when the tip of his middle finger enters your hole cautiously, his eyebrows raise. âY-yeah rightâÂ
He repeats the motion, this time using the opportunity to push deeper, you clench around his fingers and he feels his cock throb inside of his jeans, âits soâŚwarmâ He notes, âTry curling your fingerââ Your words fade into a whimper when he does exactly that,
âHee..Heeseungâwait,â He repeats the motion again, brushing inside of you with each curl of his slender finger.Â
âNot hereââ You breathe out, your grip tightening on his shoulder. âYour room?â He questions, inching his finger out, you nod,
ââŚyouâre so prettyâ He says sitting on the edge of your bed, âYeah?â You ask, watching him move back until he's against your pillows. âWhat do you want, Heeseung?â He swallows, "Whatever you give me honestlyââÂ
âEver had a girl ride you?â You ask, climbing on the bed with him, legs tucked under you as you settle between his legs. He shakes his head a bead of sweat forming just above his eyebrow.
âI kind of like that I'm the only one who's seen you like this,â You say, finger tracing innocent circles on his thigh. âI like it that wayâ He admits, avoiding looking down at the embarrassing way his dick twitches at the featherlight touches his thigh.
âCute,â You say with a sweet smile, opposite of the way your fingers make contact with the buttons on his shirt. You remove it with ease, the slightly sharp tip of your nail sending heat straight to his dick as you trace his abdomen.
You lean down, pressing a kiss to the center of his chest, his hands grip into the sheets of his bed when your tongue ghosts over his nipple, âFuckâ y/n..I canâtââ His hips buck forward, searching for any form of friction
âIve been wanting you inside me for so long Hee,â His eyes roll when your hand comes in contact with his cock, even through the jeans you can feel the heat of him. âWanna feel you so badâ I need it..I canâtââ He whines, you sit up, watching as he frantically works to take off his jeans.Â
You move from between his legs, pulling the straps of your dress down, letting it fall limply to the floor. His own hand palms his cock through his boxers when he sees youâre not even wearing a fucking bra.
âPleaseâcan I?â He asks, watching as you climb back on top of him. You chuckle âActing like youâve never seen my tits before Heeseung,âÂ
âBeen too longââ He says desperately, his hand hesitating, looking at you for approval before he touches you. You nod and both of his hands immediately cup your breasts. Heâs almost massaging them in his hands, âI- I canât believe youâre letting me do this..â He whispers, thumb swiping over your nipples, you grind down once against him and his movements falterâ
âIâll cum if you keep doing t-thatâ He regrets admitting that when you do it again, drawing a wrecked sound from him. His ears heat up in embarrassment at how loud he is, Your hand comes up to his cheek, âDonât be embarrassed Heeâ I love when youâre vocal for me,â He leans into the way you touch his face, the action making you feel even more warm inside.
His eyes donât leave yours as he presses a kiss directly to your nipple, his thumb working the other one. Heâs not quite sure what he's doingâ this just feels right. His tongue darts out, slightly unsure, licking just around the sensitive bud. âH-Hee..â Your hand moves to his hair, raking through the soft strands, pulling him closer.Â
âI want this so bad..â He whispers, eyes fluttering shut when he sucks on your nipple. You hiss when his teeth graze it, tugging his hair, he groans at the pull. He alternates to the other side, not wanting to leave a single part of your body untouched. âI could do this foreverâ I swear I could,â You grind your hips down harder against him, âD-donâtââ He whimpers, looking up at you.Â
Instead, you lean down to kiss him, moving your hips in a back and forward motion, the tip of his dick hitting you perfectly through the thin fabric of your underwear. âGonna cum?â You ask between kisses, he nods frantically, tongue darting out, begging for entry back into your mouth.Â
You pull away and he whines, hand glued to your chest. You shake your head with a smile before reaching for the waistband of his boxers, you peel them off, revealing his flushed cock, now resting heavy on his pelvis, precum already drooling down. You lick your lips, already moving to slide off your own underwear.Â
He's watching in aweâ because you are actually in front of him right nowâ naked, practically fucking glowing. When you wrap your hand around the base, he automatically thrusts up, easy to do with how wet it is. âNeedy much?â You tease, moving your hand up slowly, thumb swiping over the tip, causing another drop of precum to leak, making a further mess on your hand.Â
âI c-canât help it..â He mutters out, cheeks flushed, hair sticking to his forehead, chest glistening with a thin layer of sweat already. You hover over him, angling the tip of his cock, you swipe it through your folds onceâtwice, mixing both of your arousal together, the warmth already draws a moan from him. âW-wait..â He says, hand reaching for your wrist.
You pause, looking at him, âDonât we need aâ um.. Condom?â You tilt your head, amusement on your face, âIâm on the pill Hee, plus I want you to cum inside of me.â Youâre going to kill him, like heâs actually going to pass out right now.Â
You position his tip just before your entrance, before sinking down. The stretch is almost immediate, your pussy greedily sucking him in. âOh my Godââ His eyes flutter shut, hands reaching out to hold onto your hips. âY-youâre so big Heeseungââ Youâre already clenching around him, his hips involuntarily thrust up and you whimper,
âShitâsorry, y/n..ohââ You sink down further, completely enveloping his thick cock inside of you. Your hands are braced against his chest now, âA-are you okay?â He asks, voice rough. You laugh lightly causing you to clench tightly around him. You experimentally grind your hips forward, both of your moans mixing together.Â
His hands wander, squeezing the soft flesh of your ass as you grind against him. He nearly chokes on air when you lift yourself up halfway just to slam back down against him, his finger digging deeper into your hipsâ âY/nâ wait!â You repeat the movement and thats when you feel itâ warmth inside of you.Â
His eyes are wide in worryâ âI-Im sorry.. Im sorryâpleaseâ a whimper leaving his lips as cum leaks from his still hard dick. âShhh.. itâs okay Hee,â He shakes his head, âI promise I can go longerâ I just need to practice moreâ He tries to convince you, but youâre already set on making him cum again.
You lean back, spreading your legs wider, hands splayed behind you on his thighs to support yourself. You lift your hips, causing his cum to leak out of you and trickle down his length, making an even bigger mess. Itâs so messy but he could care less,
His cum acts as lube, allowing you to move even more smoothly, the sounds coming from the both of you are borderline pornographic, the wet skin on skin every time you slam your hips back down against his.Â
Your mouth hangs open, desperate moans escaping as you bounce on his dick, âHeeseungââ You cry out, grinding against him, the tip of his cock hitting just right inside of you, âYou look so pretty right nowââ He says through a needy whine, his eyes donât know what to focus onâ the way your tits move each time you grind forward, your face, or where you two connect right now.
He tries somethingâ moving his finger from your hip, applying pressure to your puffy clit instead, your hips jerk forward, pussy clamping tight around him. The rhythm you had moments ago falters, replaced by desperate grinds against him as you chase your orgasm, his thumb rubs small circles on your sensitive bud, âIâm gonna cum Heeâ I canâtâ You cry out, leaning forward again, bracing your hands on his chest âYesâ fuck, please use meââ His thumb still works, his own hips attempting to thrust up, your nails scratch at his chest as a new wave of pleasure crashes over you.
He pulls you closer, pressing a kiss to your jaw, his dick throbbing inside of your warmth, your juices leaking down, covering his balls and making a mess on your sheets. His hands travel from your hair, smoothing it down to your back, âIâm gonnaâ cum againâplease?â He says, looking up at you. His dick twitches inside of you when you nod, his hands cup your ass in his hands, lifting you slightlyâ again, heâs trying to find his rhythm here too, contemplating if this is right, but it feels amazing.
He thrusts up once, earning a surprised gasp from you, he could fucking explode with the way your tits bounce in his face, the wet sounds filling your room contrast with both of your moans, his fading into whimpers as his hips move faster, almost using your hole as his own fuck toy. He captures one of your nipples in his mouth, his sounds muffled around the sensitive bud, the vibration sending shockwaves straight to your core.
âS-slow downâHee.. Shit!â He's practically drilling into you, completely lost in the feeling of you, the sounds you're makingâyour face driving him even more. He pulls you down against him each time his hips lift forward, his tongue licking at your chest desperately. His grip on you is bruising as he delivers one final thrustâdeep, the feeling of his cum spilling inside of you, driving your second orgasm, your pussy milking him dry as your own juices mix with his.Â
His hands move from your ass to your waist, resting gently, soothing your sides as you both catch your breath. âThatâthat was..â Heeseung says, âYeah,â You breathe, fingers running lazily through his soft hair.Â
Eventually you two muster the strength to get up, your sensitive bodies still tingling with the nerves of pretty much the best sex youâve ever had.Â
You watch him closely as he reaches for a soft tissue from the pink box on your nightstand, he may be inexperienced in this field but he's not an idiot. âIs this okay?â He asks, cleaning you upâ you nod,
âAre you okay?â He looks up at you for a second, âIââ he takes a deep breath before continuing âI donât want this to be casual,â He says, eyes focused on gently swiping the tissue. Your face softens, âI donât want it to be like before with the whole âfavor for tutoringâ thingâ I like you, really like youâ if you couldnât tell..â He bites his lip nervously,
âIs this your way of asking to be my boyfriend Lee Heeseung?â This time he looks up, âYou would let me?â he asks, a sparkle of hope in his eyes, âIâ this isnât how I wanted to ask you, I need to get you flowers andâand a date,â He runs his hand through his slightly damp hair, you let out a small laugh,
âCalm down Hee, I really like you too,â You say through a smile. â..and yeah, I would let you..â He mirrors your smile, relief on his face as you pull him downâbecause being here, tangled with you, is exactly where he wants to be
-
Bonus
Heeseung would normally be spending his Friday night in his room, probably waiting for league to load in while he scrolls through the most random twitter threads. But being with you allows him to.. Step out of his shell more, even if it is involuntarily.
What was supposed to be a small hangout that consisted of a few of your friends and probably Jake to celebrate finals week ending, had turned into a big gathering at your local Korean BBQ place. Jake being Jake decided to invite nearly everyone from class after raving about how they âchanged the menuâ.  Â
His eyes stray to you, laughing at something that Sunoo said, Yunjin on the other side of him playfully shoving him. â..Hey, iâm headed outâ Clair says, walking over to where Heeseung stands. You watch as sheâŚhugs him. His hand awkwardly pats her back and you swear you could throw the chopsticks in your hand at her stupid face. âBye everyone!â She says with a bright smile, you roll your eyes, watching as she leaves.Â
Yunjin and Sunoo exchange a look, âDonât kill her,â Sunoo says, laughing nervously. âNever said I would.â You mutter glancing at Heeseung, he offers a small wave, smile on his face. You scrunch your nose in a mocking way before turning back to your friends.Â
Fuck.
ââŚyeah, well your face says it all,â Yunjin adds, amusement in her tone. âI donât even care,â Sunoo laughs, earning a glare from you. âYeahâright, are you gonna eat that?â He asks pointing to the three bites of food on your plate, you scoot it away from him, âNow I am,â You say with a smug smirk, earning a laugh from Yunjin.
You tryâ you really do, you know jealousy is something you need to work on, but no youâre not jealous right now, totally not at all!
Heeseung looks at you every few minutesâ maybe seconds, there's no way youâre upset over a..farewell goodbye..right?
The walk back to his place is quiet. Not the comfortable silence you enjoy yourself in, but the kind where you can feel the tension. Specifically he can feel itâpractically radiating off of you. âIs everything good?â He asks, watching you. When your eyes don't even find his, he swallows, lump in his throat. âItâs fine.â
Well shit, âfineâ isnât exactly what a guy wants to hear, why not âgreatâ, or âfantasticâ something so his brain can stop spiraling. You nearly scoff when he pulls out his phone.Â
Heâs patheticâseriously, he winces before clicking the search bar on twitter: How to get your girlfriend to not be pissed at you
He doesnât even say anything as you both enter his apartment, you roll your eyes as he walks to his bedroom, sitting at the edge of his bed. âSeriously Heeseung?â You ask, crossing your arms over your chest. He scrolls one more time before looking up at you with wide eyes, âBabyâ hold on a secondââ He mutters,Â
âWhat are you even looking at?â You ask, attitude leaking through your tone. He shuts his eyes for a moment, âYouâre mad at me,â he claims, avoiding eye contact. âAnd Iâ I was trying to figure out how to not make you mad at meâ itâs stupid and I know it was because of..â , âClair.â You finish his sentence for him.Â
He nods, âI donât even like herâ seriously, like the only reason I have to be around her is because of the club and sheâs in me and Jungwon's classââ You roll your eyes, âSheâs literally obsessed with youâ like itâs so fucking annoying everytime and she knows me and you are together.â His eyebrows furrow together, âI know, trust me I knowââ He says, pulling you close, arms wrapping around the back of your thighs.Â
âWell I'm not mad directly at you Hee..â You mumble quietly, he looks up at you, âBut youâre still upsetâ He says, hands unintentionally gripping the back of your thighs. âAnd how exactly was the internet going to help fix that?â You ask lightly, hand running through his disheveled hair.
âI dunnoâ it was stupid..â he mutters, reaching for his phone. He scrolls through the threads, angling it to show you. âGet on your knees and beg?â You chuckle, âIâd do it if you asked,â He says casually, âFlowers?â , âIn a heartbeat,â His fingers freeze at the next words, Let her sit on your face. You know he's read it when he looks up at you. Your eyes fall to his lips, then to his noseâ that perfect slope. He swallows, Adams apple bobbing. âWe havenât really tried it likeâŚthatââ He says, wetting his lips.Â
âNo, we haven't." He nods, slowly. âYou said my nose was one of your favorite features about me, remember?â You chuckle lightly, âOf course I remember that.â His hands travel up slowly, casually in a way heâs gotten more comfortable doing ever since you two made it official, his hands ultimately resting on your ass.Â
â..so, shouldnât we put it to good use?â He questions, looking up at you expectantly. A smile spreads across your face, âSince when did Lee Heeseung become such a smooth talker?â He bites his lip through a smile, âitâs only for you pretty,â
He's watching you now, eyes zeroed in on your hands as they lift your shirt over your head. Your shorts are next, but he makes a sound when your underwear also comes off with them. Bare. Youâre bare in front of him, your face flushing that adorable shade of pink he canât get enough of.Â
âCâmere,â You climb onto the bed with him until you're hovering just over his chest. âHeeseungâ I donât want to like⌠hurt youâ His hands are already on your waist, attempting to tug you upwards. âYouâre notâ I want thisâÂ
The look in his eyes is hungry, you hesitate for a moment before moving forward, until your knees are bracketed beside his head, your pussy right above his face. âBabyââ He breathes out, pulling you flush against his face.Â
You gasp at the feeling, sure Heeseung's eaten you out beforeâplenty of times, but thisâ this is different. âOh..fuckâHeeseung!â Your hands are in his hair, pulling the soft strands, he groans into your pussy, pure pleasure.Â
His hands are gripping onto your ass, pulling you against him, He pulls off with a wet pop, âRide my noseâ come on, you know you want to,â He urges, giving a teasing lick to your clit. You hum out a response, eyes rolling when he nuzzles into your pussy, the bridge of his sharp nose hitting just right on your sensitive clit each time you move your hips forward slightly. His eyes are shut, completely lost in the feelâ the smell of you so close to him.Â
He pulls you back down, tongue prodding at your entrance, your hole desperately clenchingâsearching for fulfillment, and he gives it, he thrusts his tongue in and out of you the best he can, hands massaging your ass, nose applying pressure exactly where you need it.Â
âI canââ He slurps once, the noise filthy in your bedroom, âI can never get enough of thisââ His tongue flicks over your clit, alternating between sucking, teasing you through pursed lips. âHee.. Iâim gonna cum..â your plea encourages him more. He looks up at your face, your head thrown back, tits bouncing in that light pink bra, mouth hung open, face in pure pleasure.
There's no rhythm, just hunger as he devours you, your grip tightens in his hair as you reach your orgasm, your legs going weak, grinding on his mouth, he holds you there, not letting you up until every last drop of cum is drained out of you, his tongue moving in slow licks over your overstimulated clit, the feeling making your hips jerk. He kisses your pussy once, twice, gentleâcompletely different from the way he was just tongue deep inside of you. Â
You settle on his stomach, still dripping, some getting onto his shirt but he could care less. âThat wasââÂ
âAmazing.â He finishes for you, licking his lips.Â
âYouâre crazy.â You mumble, a shy smile already on your face.
âOnly for you,â he whispers, hands traveling up your waist, your back, urging you to be even closer to him.