Ariana Tippet. Nineteen. She was supposed to get out first, and it ended up being me. She was supposed to have the life, and it ended up being me. She's gone, and I'm still here. Everything was going right until it all went wrong. Everything was fine until it all fell apart. (disclaimer; not ashley benson. just a roleplayer.)
Hey, we had good reason to be a bunch of saps, you brat. It wasn’t stupid.. well, it was stupid.. but, don’t dwell on it.. There’s nothing you can do now. But, yeah, I guess you had your opportunity, huh? Might as well use it while you can.. I promise.. You know me.. I’m not the type to quit.. I’m doing it what I can for everyone.. I promise, you don’t have to worry. You must see all the stupid shit Lexie does to drive me up the wall, then, huh? I know.. they’re so big now.. I can’t.. even remember when they were small. They’ll always be my babies.. but.. jeez. Sadly true with Brooke though. Don’t freak her out too much.. she seems to have more good days than bad now..
I know, but still; you're a bunch of saps. It was stupid. Part of being dead...you dwell on things. A lot of things....or maybe that's me. I took every opportunity I got, and it was awesome. I know, but still, you're going to hit a point where you'll want to give up. I'm going to worry anyway. That's all I can do now. Yeah I do, some stuff I encourage her on, other times I sit there and just kind of laugh because she's so your kid. I do...hell I remember when you were pregnant. She doesn't seem to get freaked out now...I've never really...made myself visible, like now or like when I enjoy freaking the hell out of Justin. I just kind of sit out of the way and watch her...at first she freaked, but now she's...I don't know I think she's used to it.
I actually get that question less often than you'd imagine... It's...not all that different, from being alive...hell of a lot less pain if I play my cards right. have the ability to keep track on everyone I need to...it's kind of nice, actually.
Yeah, it was pretty pitiful, huh? I just.. really love you, kiddo. We all did.. It was.. just a big shock, you know? I figured.. you were. That’s so very like you. Yeah.. soon enough, but I gotta do this stupid chemo stuff first, huh? It’s not.. as fun as it sounds. What do I gotta promise? Brooke.. why doesn’t that not surprise me.. But, you, I’m glad.. You deserved to be happy.. you always did. Yeah.. I did. They had a ball, they loved the mini road trip.. And, I had some time off, so it was worth. Said hi to your Mom, too. You really are, though..
Yeah...you bunch of saps. I know...I was stupid...I made a stupid mistake. It's ironic, really. Well of course...any opportunity I can take to mutter something smart-ass and sarcastic with no chance of you or Jordan smacking me? You bet I'm taking it. Yeah you do. Doesn't sound fun at all....kind of sounds like hell actually. You gotta promise you're going to fight until you can't fight anymore, and you can't give up. Don't do it for me, do it for the girls, and I'll be watching, usually always am...but more so watching the little munchkins than you and Adam...god they grew up. Because it's my pain in the ass little sister. Nothing she does is surprising. Good...I'm glad. Ah yeah...I have to go see her one of these days. It's what I'm good at.
Well.. we miss you.. I didn’t want to believe you were dead.. I wanted you to just.. pop up in my office and give me some smart ass response.. like usual. I guess.. It’s coming soon enough, huh? We’ll all get to be up there together… soon enough. How’s Brooke? Is she happy? Are you happy? Are you okay? The girls, they made you Christmas presents.. I left them at your grave.. We never forgot you.
I know that too. I sat there for a while, watching you, and Jordan, and Adam..., watched my mom for a while too. If it helps I muttered some smart ass responses, you just couldn't hear them. Soon enough, but not yet. So...until soon enough gets here, you gotta promise me something. Brooke is Brooke, not much has changed. I'd say she is... Me? Yeah...yeah I'm happy. That explains those boxes....you went all the way to Connecticut just to leave presents? I kind of am unforgettable...oh god Alyssa had a point, I do sound like a shit when I say that.
Ariana.. I have cancer.. They found it over Christmas break.. They don’t.. know how long.. I thought you were coming to take me.. because I.. died or something. How’s things up there?
I know. I mean...yeah, I can't deny it....I kind of poke in unseen on you and the kids, and Liv, and Justin sometimes. It's a habit. You'll know when you're dead, Jamie...you're not stupid like I was. I literally saw Brooke and had to ask her if I was dead. Actually...not that different than before. Brooke's a little pain in my ass, Alyssa's a little pain in my ass....it's kind of like down here only...we're dead.
Time? What time? For what? I'm just here making sure Alyssa stays out of total trouble....and she wanted privacy with Bradley...so I'm now roaming the halls...yeah.
Okay you little shit, go get your closure...earn your wings...whatever it was that you came back and I subsequently follow...I'm going to go roam. If you need me, for the love of god, do not come through a wall and smack me on the back of the head like Brooke likes to do.
Yeah, I do. Okay, fine, whatever.. but please, once I see Bradley, do not follow me.. that’s literally the only time I want at least a little bit of space, you know I hate you seeing me cry.. Oh come on man, Justin’s feeling guilty that he’s had that closure and Liv’s still sitting there, waiting… and what about her kid? That thing you told me to do? Why didn’t you do that?
Hey this is the point I cut the leash and go deal with my own shit. I know I've got a habit of peeping in on the private time of others, but I'd at least give you that much decency not to. Hah, jokes on you kid, I've seen you cry more than you think. Dude, no. Not going to New York. Not happening. I see her, I'm going to have a breakdown....if dead people can have breakdowns. Because that's different...you...it's just different okay?
No, no you really don't. Because I could? You're not the only one who has a loose end or two to tie up here. Besides...no New York. Not yet. I took care of Justin. I can't see Liv yet.
An explanation statement will follow immediately after this, so stay tuned to the main for it. But yes...there's this. While this hurt like hell, I still have to thank Andrea and Sha for their help in this idea. Okay...one last thing; trigger warning for death. And here we go;
“I’ve got it. I’m going to leave now, I’ll call you when I get into New York, I promise. I’ll be fine, okay? Okay, I love you too.”
Hanging up her phone, Ariana slipped her phone into her pocket before she hefted her bag over her shoulder. Grabbing her keys and the day pass she’d gotten off of her dresser, her eyes scanned over the room one last time before she exited the room and pulled the door closed behind her.
Seeing Justin at school had been something she’d promised him, and herself, that she would do ever since he left. She’d forgotten about it until the idea came back to her in the middle of the night one night, and then it’d wouldn’t leave her mind. So she’d gotten the day pass, packed a bag, and talked her friend from home into driving up with her car when he came that week to check out a couple last minute colleges.
Fighting back a small yawn, Ariana slipped the day pass into her pocket before exiting out the front doors of the asylum. Giving her eyes a minute to adjust to the dark of the night compared to the lighting of the building, her eyes scanned the parking lot before coming to a stop on her car. She quickly found the right key, crossing the lot and swiftly sticking the key in the lock of her car, pulling the door open.
A yawn slipped out of her mouth as she gently tossed her bag into the backseat, and again as she stuck the key into the ignition, turning the car on. Very briefly the thought crossed her mind that she should probably wait until the morning to go, but as soon as she had the car in gear and was exiting the parking lot towards the road, the thought was gone. The only thought in her mind after that was the problem of getting to Justin with not a lot of money in her pocket. After giving it little thought, the only solution she found was to drive straight through from the asylum to there, no stops, and at night.
It probably wasn’t a good idea for her to think she could make the drive straight through to New York on only a few hours of sleep, especially without stopping. It was actually probably one of the worst idea she ever could’ve had. But she didn’t think about the fact it could’ve been the worst idea she’d ever had. All she was concerned with, was the quickest way that would get her to New York by spending the least about of money possible.
She hadn’t been on the road long, when the exhaustion began to slowly set in, but she ignored it. Sitting up a little straighter, she continued on.
The view in front of her was clear, in that moment it was just her and the open road. She still had a long way to go, but the exhaustion was taking over, faster than it began to set in. She knew she should pull over and find somewhere to stop for the night, using as little money as possible be damned, but she didn’t. She kept going. Her eyes had slipped closed for only a second before the sound of a blaring horn jolted them open again. By some stroke of luck she had enough time to notice the car heading straight towards her and jerk her steering wheel to get herself back in her own lane. The adrenaline still coursing through her veins, she sat up a little straighter. Getting herself through the intersection she slowed down a bit, making sure it was only her and the open road again before she allowed herself to relax.
This time her eyes had managed to slip closed for a few seconds, this time the sound of a blaring horn accompanied by screeching tires jolted her awake. But when she jerked the steering wheel to get the car into the other way, she couldn’t regain control. She gets the car into the other lane but the car keeps going, not stopping until it was stopped by a tree on the side of the road.
The first thing she’s aware of in the split second before the car hits the tree is there’s nothing she can do to stop the car from hitting the tree, and it’s then the sudden sound of crunching metal is heard, to her seeming deafening. The next thing she’s aware of is she doesn’t hear the soft click that let her know her seatbelt’s locked all the way. As her head and upper body slam into the steering wheel, the first thing to go through her mind the realization was her airbags didn’t deploy. Her head makes contact with steering wheel first, and the first thought that comes to mind is her mother. Her chest makes contact with the steering wheel next, and the next thought that enters her mind before the darkness engulfs her, is her sister.
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"Ya know..death isn't as cool as in the movies, for one part..there's no ’Forever 21’."
Hearing a voice, her eyes blink open. The first thing she notices is Brooke’s standing in front of her, and it renders her speechless.
"Oh and another thing, sex is not better when you're dead, all the guys have a hard time getting up. And I don't mean that in a sexual way."
Ariana stares at her for a minute before she glances around. She notes the sight of her car smashed against the tree a few feet away, cop cars and an ambulance blocking the road in either direction. Ariana glances at Brooke, letting out a sigh. “I’m dead, aren’t I?”
Brooke smirks that famous smirk Ariana hadn’t realized she missed so much. "Look who's catching on."
Ariana’s quiet, watching the scene in front of them before she hears Brooke speak again.
"How do you think Liv's handling it? Greyson? Lucy? Hell, how do you think Jamie and Ethan are handling it?"
"Depends, first question would be how long have I been dead for?"
Brooke shrugs. "I haven't really been watching, I was a little preoccupied, Princess Diana and I were having lunch."
"You're still a big help, even in the afterlife, and given it’s sometime at night” Ariana sighs. “Let's see...everyone back at the asylum's probably just finding out, depending. Meaning that takes care of Liv, maybe Greyson if she wakes him up to tell him. Jamie and Ethan...I don't want to think about Jamie and Ethan. Or Lucy. Not yet. I don’t want to think about anyone or anything right now.”
“The overwhelming feeling goes away. Give it time.”
“Can I ask you a serious question?”
“I have a feeling you’re going to ask the question no matter what I tell you. So go on.”
“Was all that hard work I put in for nothing? I mean I’m leaving the asylum in a body bag anyway.”
Brooke’s quiet for a moment, before she puts her hand against Ariana’s shoulder.
“There isn't one thing in the world that's..for nothing, Ariana. They wouldn't be calling it life if that's how it was. You've made your mistakes. So have I. You cant stand here and tell me that you haven't gained anything..utterly amazing since you went to that asylum, because even I'd know you were lying to yourself. Think about it, think about all the wonderful things you got out of it. Thn tell me if your hard work was for 'nothing'."
This time, Ariana’s quiet. “They’re going to be fine. You’re going to be fine. You can’t change anything now. You made your mistakes, this one cost you your life. Unfortunately that’s the price you pay sometimes.”
Maybe I meant it more than the people here did.. You never know. How can you not think of me as a stupid bitch? That’s all I am. I just gave you up like it was nothing.. Then you went and tried to kill yourself.. so.. I don’t know. If you ask me, I think I’m a stupid bitch.
Sure, sure, I believe that. Maybe you are a stupid bitch. A stupid, selfish, bitch, but if you want the honest-to-God truth, Ashley, I only think you're a stupid,selfish bitch when I'm having a bad day. That's the beauty of it though; I'm over it. I'm over you just giving me up like it was nothing, like I was nothing. I'm over wanting to kill myself, I'm over all of it. I might not be totally happy now, but I will be.
let's waste time chasing cars @arianatippet - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
