AroAce Coyote

my brand of different

[mangodebango]

Ace Cards, Jeu S.L.C. Atlanta Salut les Copains Playing Cards by Stemm, France, 1960′s.

[valiantsilver]

when you’re asexual but don’t realise you’re also aromantic

[image description: the ‘wait, it’s all Ohio’ meme. The planet is labelled as “My ‘crushes’ on friends that are actually cries for intimacy and platonic affection”. The first astronaut is labelled “Me” and is saying “Wait, it’s all platonic?”. The other astronaut, holding a gun, is labelled “My aromanticism” and is saying “Always has been.” End description.]

[acespec-ed]

You might be sexually attracted to that person if…

- You think sexual thoughts about the person out of nowhere

- You feel aroused upon seeing the person outside of a sexual setting

- You find yourself wondering what the person is like in bed and what their genitals look like 

- You want to have sex with that person because your body is screaming for sex with that one person in particular.

- Seriously though if you’re already horny and that person is there you will feel all hot and sexually aroused and might drool a bit and fantasies of doing X-rated things to that person will fly through your mind and your body will literally be screaming for that person to take you or for you to take that person. Even just thinking about that person while horny can do this to you.

- TMI but if you get off while fantasizing about you having sex with that person, the orgasms can be absolutely mind-blowing and may even give you leg cramps.

- You really do “just know.”

You might not be sexually attracted to that person if…

- You make a conscious effort to fantasize about sex with that person, mainly to see if you actually want to

- You feel aroused during a sexual situation, but that arousal has more to do with the activities instead of the specific person. Alternatively, you just don’t feel aroused at all.

- You feel aroused at random, but it’s directed towards no one

- You want to have sex with that person because you want to make them happy or are just horny and want to get off with a partner or want babies or want money or literally any other reason aside from your body screaming for sex with that one person in particular.

- TMI but if you try to get off while fantasizing about you having sex with that person, you may get bored and start thinking of other things. Or, you may start fantasizing about that person doing sexual things that don’t involve you in which case aegosexual might be worth looking into.

- You just don’t know.

If the “you might be sexually attracted” list boggles your mind, you are possibly asexual.

If the “you might not be sexually attracted” list boggles your mind, you are possibly not asexual.

If you can relate to the “might not be sexually attracted” list, but also feel like you’ve experienced some of the things on the “might be sexually attracted” list, it may be worth checking out some acespec identities.

(Disclaimer: This is strictly based off of my own experiences as acespec and is meant to be a guide for people questioning sexual attraction. Overall, you know yourself best and I’m not gonna tell you what you’re feeling or how to identify.)

[aegosexual-moments]

These types of lists are always so helpful!

A big one too, I think is, you may fantasize, but the people in your fantasies are never YOU. They’re fictional characters or your OCs but they’re never you specifically. And if they are it’s an idealized version of you.

That top list makes me realize I’ve never experienced any of that, it’s kinda like when I stumbled into an ask Reddit about what sexual attraction felt like and I went “yeah, I have never felt THAT way and whatever I feel isn’t sexual attraction”

[zymomonasmobilis]

here it is, the info I’ve always wanted to see, breaking down attraction vs not-attraction in intense, analytical detail

[thoughtlessthinkythoughts]

Here’s a few more for aces who do experience aesthetic attraction and who aren’t repulsed, because goodness knows these are the ones that confused me when I was figuring things out. If you have sexual fantasies that involve things being in a certain situation or having things done to you, but you aren’t visualizing anything or imagining specific people, you might not experience sexual attraction

If you’ve ever had the thought “masturbation is better than sex because it is more efficient and skips the boring bits,” you might not experience sexual attraction.

If you find someone attractive, but the thought of seeing them with their clothes off isn’t more attractive, it probably isn’t sexual attraction. (A naked body is just a naked body. But people are so lovely when in a look they’ve picked out to express themselves.)

If you occasionally notice body parts considered sexual and think they look nice, but do not want to do anything sexual related to those parts, it might not be sexual attraction. (I will occasionally think someone has nice boobs or a nice butt, and I assumed that was sexual attraction for a long time. But I’ve learned that for allo people, thinking those things leads to them having a response of “therefore I want to tap that” which is absolutely baffling to me. Also, again, those thoughts don’t lead to “and therefore I want to see them without clothing.”

If your response to something that seems to be making others horny is very similar to your response to those videos of “oddly satisfying” things, it might not be sexual attraction.

[hopefully-inspiring-persona]

Holy shit. That’s what sexual attraction is???? Was that so hard to lay out like that??? I’ve never felt any of those things and thinking about doing any of that is just so bizarre lol

[katbelleinthedark]

From my personal ace experience I’ll also add: “you might not have ever had any sexual fantasies” - that can also tip you off that you’re on the spectrum.

For me it was the no attraction + no fantasies combo.

[aro-culture-is]

Aro culture is confusing a squish with a crush. I thought I had a crush on my best friend for 6 years but it was a squish (and I still have the squish)

.

[edgebug]

“how can you be intimate with someone if you’re aromantic??”

sharing secrets, trusting them with your life, telling them about that stupid thing you did when you were 14 and haven’t told anyone else since, being there for them any time day or night, talking til three in the morning, letting yourself cry around them, sharing grief, sharing joy, getting excited about the things they’re excited about just because you love to see them so happy about something

[hyenafu]

Here’s a comic I made about identifying as asexual and aromantic! I made it for an anthology which ended up falling through, so I thought it would be a good idea to post it on Valentine’s Day.

Take care of yourselves out there! http://raizap.com/

[clovencraft]

brewing up some respect aces juice for #AceWeek 🖤🤍💜

[timid-tracks]

Maybe tattoo design?

It’s an ace of spades arrow.

Cause I’m ace/aro

this has probably been done a million times already sorry

Using the green, light green, white, grey, black colors for aromantic cause I like those best.

[a-spec-tacular]

[Image: a vector arrow with the aromantic flag colors as the feathers and the ace of spades as the arrow point, colored as the asexual flag colors]

[raavenb2619]

[ID: The corporate needs you meme. At the top, a woman holds up two images labelled “my squishes” and “my friends’ crushes” and says “Corporate needs you to find the differences between this picture and this picture.” In the second panel, she’s labelled “young, clueless me”, and she says “They’re the same picture.” End ID]

[ace-irl]

ace_irl

[mx-t4t0]

still astonished at the fact that ace week is on halloween week we just keep winning

[ace-thinks]

Do you actually want a partner or are you just afraid that your friendships will likely weaken over time as your friends start to prioritize their spouses/families over you, and even if they continue to value you as a friend, eventually you will end up largely alone and unable to relate to the life experiences of the people you once cherished?

[tevallen]

added the tails I forgot last year  shoutout to asexuals, you’re cool!!

[h2-no]

“We all know how hard it can be to repress sexual urges” can’t relate never had any lol

[floq]

pride sheet ghosts!!!!

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

Not everyone has always known their orientation. Not everyone has moments growing up where it should have been obvious. Everyone figures things out at their own pace in their own way.

[raavenb2619]

[ID: The exit 12 left meme. A car, labelled “society” takes a highway exit ramp labelled “brainwashing me into thinking my squishes were crushes” instead of continuing straight, labelled “leaving me alone”. End ID]