three words, eight letters
summary: the fear of losing her leads mac and riley to have a rare argument. and the fear of unspoken words leads both to confess how they truly feel
side note: inspired by the macriley kiss teaser article that came out a few days ago
âThen I have to leaveâ.
Mac whipped his head so fast towards Riley he swore he heard a faint crack. Her face remained firm, eyes glaring at Russ indicating she was serious. Neither showing any signs of backing down.
And waited, for Matty to answer his silent prays and step in. To refute Rileyâs decision and tell Russ he was being ridiculous. But nothing came. Not from Matty at least.
âIf thatâs what you feel you must do, then I wonât stop youâ.
Riley nodded towards Russ, giving a glance to Matty, who despite the scene in front remained suspiciously calm.
Those two words battled all reasonable logic in every part of Macâs mind. She was leaving; the Phoenix, him. And Mac barely had enough energy to move his pinky, let alone, attempt to stop Riley as she walked out the war room.
Once Mac regained conscious feeling in his body, he strutted with sheer determination into the labs. Bozer had let slip Riley was doing some last-minute packing, getting everything in order.
âThe Phoenix means the world to you and your leaving, just like that?â. He blurted, having no time for pleasantries. Or to dance around the elephant in the room. Mac needed answers.
âItâs a lot more complicated than you think, Macâ.
âReally?. Then please explain it to me, Riles. Because Iâd like to understand why youâre doing this?â.
âDoing what?. Doing what needs to be done?. Doing what I feel is right?â.
âLeaving meâ. Mac shouted, the after echo bouncing off the tables, walls, any shinny metal surface and drowning itself in Rileyâs mind.
âI meant what I promised. Iâd never leave you, Macâ.
He scoffed, knocking the pain deeper into Rileyâs heart. Yet, she remained unmoved. He couldnât know. It was safer to hurt Mac on her terms, where she could somewhat control the pain. Then to witness Mac on the verge of deathâs door again. An image that regularly haunted her dreams.
âLook around, Riles. Youâre breaking that promise right nowâ.
She sighed, flickering the tips of her nails to subdue the frustrations looming.
âI told you, itâs complicatedâ.
âAnd I asked you to explain it to me. But you havenât attempted to explain a damn thingâ.
âWhat do you want me to say?â. She called out, not realizing just how loud until the two passing lab technicians turned their heads, continuing to walk down the hallway knowing a private conversation when they heard one.
âThe truth. Or are we no longer being honest with each other?â.
She swallowed, remembering Mattyâs stern orders; âNobody can know, not even Mac. If this undercover mission is to work, we need everyone to believe youâve quit Phoenixâ.
She grabbed her bag, one filled with spare laptops and surveillance gear thanks to Matty secretly loaning her the equipment needed. And as Mac firmly caught her wrist, Riley squeezed the bag, readjusting her grip.
âWhatever youâre not telling me. Whatever youâre not allowed to share with me. Just know youâre not alone, because I-â.
He stared into her eyes, ones that seemed to be holding the weight of a heavy responsibility.
â-Because I love you, Riles. And this door between us, I wanna open it. Iâm done waiting for the right timeâ.
Rileyâs mind shut down, struggling to keep up with the overload of emotions. Every part of her body only felt Mac. From his touch. To the way, his cologne infused her senses. To the way she could only stare blankly at him, watching in excruciatingly slow motion his face change from hopeful to confused.
âI know, I heard. IâŚI just need a minuteâ.
âA minute?. To what, decide if you love me back?â.
Mac ruffled his hair, accidentally pulling a few strands out.
âI guess, good luck at your new job thenâ.
âMac, waitâ. Riley called out, receiving nothing back but the whisper-quiet echo of the hallway.
She threw the duffel bag near the door, not bothering to empty the contents as they served as unwanted reminders of the price she paid in accepting the undercover op. And she restlessly debated on the drive home in calling Matty and negotiating so Mac could get involved. But she already knew those phone call minutes would be wasted, as Matty made it crystal clear this was her mission to bear. Nonetheless, that didnât stop Riley from wanting to scream into a pillow. Not just because of the lies and secrets which were already piling up considerably fast. More so, because of the overshadowing presences of Macâs three words, eight letter confession.
Heavily sinking onto the couch, she pulled out her phone, finger hovering over Macâs contact.
He carelessly threw his jacket over the wooden bench, beyond tired and quite frankly, in no mood to concern himself over neatly displaying a piece of clothing. Grabbing a beer, Mac inhaled the liquid until he needed air more than alcohol. Next his keys slid across the counter hitting the utensil tin, which Mac simply ignored. At this moment he only had one focus - replaying the conversation. None of it made any sense. Even less so when Rileyâs reaction to his confession flickered at the forefront of his mind. He knew her feelings for him were just as strong as his were for her. And yet, as Mac sunk onto the edge of the couch, fingers grazing the blanket they had both wrapped themselves in while watching Die Hard a few nights earlier. It prompted him to wonder had he misread all the signs?.
Reaching for his phone, he hesitated. Finally, with a little sip of courage, Mac scrolled down, lingering over Rileyâs name.
And unbeknown to both, they glanced towards the door, then back to their phones. Each perfectly timed as if they were sitting right beside each other. And as the clock grew past midnight, so did the anxious anticipation. With it, Riley knew she wasnât going to be able to sleep without seeing him, so she grabbed her keys. Simultaneously, Mac couldnât take not knowing why she hadnât said it back, and marched with the same determination - perhaps even a little more than what he possessed that morning - towards the door.
He came to an abrupt halt seeing Riley standing on his porch, milliseconds away from ringing the doorbell. Each displaying shock in the precise timing of a shared thought. And as the atmosphere shifted from shock to slowly drinking each other in, Mac noticed the gloss of rain shining across her bottom lip under his porch light. He was thankful Riley couldnât see how white his knuckles had gotten gripping the handle when she pressed her lips together soaking up the droplet. Behind her, the drizzle of rain had begun to fall a little more heavily. Although, not overly loud that it pounded against the roof, but just enough to add more tension to the growing heat - feeding off their unspoken words - between two friends.
The tips of Rileyâs boots aligned perfectly with the threshold of the door. Mac blinked. Wondering if the possibility of it being a sign held any weight. For, she was here, almost completely through his door. However, the more Mac started to allow logic into the mix of his wondrous, hopeful imagination, it sounded exceedingly ridiculous. Yet, there was something in her eyes that caused Macâs inner voice to whisper - kiss her.
Kicking the door shut, Mac pressed her against the wooden surface, skillfully avoiding the handle. Both placing every ounce of greedy desire into their first kiss, making quick work in finding the perfect rhythm, melting into each other. By the time they both parted, chests were visibly rising. Rileyâs cheeks flushed, and Macâs hair dishevelled like heâd just awoken. Cupping his cheek, her hands felt smooth and warm despite the bitter weather outside.
âI love you, of course, I do. But-â.
âNo, donât say anything else, okay. Letâs just leave it at I love youâ. He whispered, shaking his head, not wanting the bubble of bliss to evaporate before he could fully immerse himself in how right it felt to hear and say those words.
âI need to clear the air, Mac. Itâs not that I donât want to tell you, I canât-â. Her lips trembled, thinking back to their argument. â-If I could, you know youâd be the first person Iâd come toâ.
âItâs okay, I understand your hands are tied. But promise me one thing. Whatever youâre getting involved in, be carefulâ.
âI mean it, Riles. When this is all over, I need you to come back home to meâ.
The shakiness swallowed the stability Mac was trying to uphold. Riley wrapped her arms around his neck, holding tightly and pulling him closer as humanly possible.
âThereâs no one Iâd rather come home to more than you, Macâ.
He softly smiled, passionately capturing her lips once more. Their pulsing hearts matching each otherâs beats.
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