Crow

Crow :), 18+, Multifandom blog for all things fluffy and most likely tickly, SFW, minors DNI, brand new blog so we’ll see how this goes lmao

[as-the-crows-feather-falls]

Hey guys!! I’m Crow!!

A blog filled with all things fluffy and tickly and chaotic! I’m just here for a fun time lmao :D

Some fandoms I’m in:

Arcane

Rise of the TMNT

HTTYD

Lego Monkey Kid

Avatar (with the Na’vi)

The Amazing Digital Circus

Project Hail Mary

I won’t post consistently about each of these most likely because silly goofy brain go brrr I cannot control it it depends on the day lmao

This blog will be mainly SFW content, but minors DNI please and thank you

[as-the-crows-feather-falls]

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again I think it’s the best thing ever that a massive chunk of the PHM fandom has taken one look at Ryland Grace and just collectively decided “yeah this guy is the most ticklish man alive and that needs to be abused immediately he needs to smile and laugh and let go and and and”

Like it’s the silliest thing to me!! I’m scrolling through instagram and find a BloodyMary artist and over multiple posts/drawings the slightest touches get him giggling it’s the cutest thing ever!!! And it’s not even that one artist I could name a handful of art pieces that either alludes to or solidifies the headcanon that Grace is ticklish. I’m just in love with the concept. Like what do you mean the number one collective headcanon is that he’s aroace or at least within that spectrum (makes me feel seen as fuck we love some good solid ace rep) and the second most collective headcanon is that he’s deathly ticklish?!?! And likes to be tickled?!?!

Idk man it just makes me very happy scuttles back to my cave

[dippersgotchu]

SUCH a shame I dont have my wings. because I know they are crazy ticklish

[gigglygoob]

I'm just imagining someone stroking their fingers through your wings and being like "relax, I'm just preening you 🙄"

Meanwhile, they're DELIBERATELY scribbling at your wing pits and nuzzling and muttering teases into the feathers.

Maybe they even pick up a stray feather and brush it along your back and against your neck.

[dippersgotchu]

H holy moly m my wings dont even have feathers but this got me BBBAAD YOURE EVIL YOU ARE,,,, HHHHHHHH HH,,,,, ,,,

[as-the-crows-feather-falls]

Wing pits dude. Think about the wing pits. And the extra pectoral muscles you’d have to have to support that downstroke in flight, it would have to run right along your bottom rib. Can you imagine how ticklish that would be? From gentle tracing to digging and relentless scribbling it would be capital b Bad

[thecheesiestler]

An offering for the lee!Grace fanatics (me)

[duketod]

pt 1

[as-the-crows-feather-falls]

What if Grace and Rocky met @squirmyworm’s beloved little squirmles👀

[as-the-crows-feather-falls]

Hi! If you don’t mind, would you have a minute to check out my phm tickle fic?

For some reason my posts aren’t showing up in tags nor anywhere and I’m confused and I don’t know why, because I only wanted to share sth wholesome to the community as well :(

I gotchu bro omw🙂‍↕️

[as-the-crows-feather-falls]

These are the types of comments/tags that make my entire day actually catch me crying in the club I love writing it makes people happy and me happy too

@sunstone-smiles

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Hey yall my asks are open if anyone wants to say hi!! Not taking requests rn but I’m more than happy to chat :DDD

[plumaluneee]

Hehehe.. since requests are uh open.. anything w switch! Grace and switch!Rocky bc I love to see everyone's fav space blond all giggly but there's also so little lee Rocky.. so why not get the best of both if you're willing :3 /nf

If you don't feel like doing that just Lee Grace is fine hehe ^^

YES there is so little lee Rocky he needs to be knocked down a sassy peg or two sometimes please take this platter of zero gravity tickles

I headcanon that Rocky’s laughter just translates to just random chords and his habit of repeating words for emphasizing is just like.. tenfold

Also excuse any typos it is currently 3 am here 

[as-the-crows-feather-falls]

First Contact

Summary: After discussing the problem of Grace’s fine-motor skills once starvation settles deep into his body on the way to Erid, Rocky has an idea to fix it and keep Grace comfortable and safe. Testing this idea leads to hijinks.

Warnings: Spoilers for Project Hail Mary, mentions of starvation and scarring but nothing too major, they’re both a little traumatized it’s alright, this is a tickle fic so if that’s not your thing don’t read🙂‍↕️

Author’s note: guys this fic is like two weeks in the making and I had a frickin blast writing it!!! I love them so much I’m shaking them in my teeth they’re the platonic soulmates ever

If there was one thing about Rocky that Ryland Grace had learned, it was that he was a planner. As in a years ahead type of planner. Maybe it was because it concerned the overall wellbeing of his best friend, or maybe he was always that way. Granted, said best friend probably should have been thinking that far ahead anyway, but he wasn’t.

At first it came from a quiet day of parallel work. Both Grace and Rocky had been in the lab, the former doing calculations on how best to ration his meals for the trip to Erid, and the latter tinkering with some unknown Xenonite contraption. Then Rocky stopped his tinkering altogether. Which was a surprise, considering that even deep in thought he always seemed to be doing something with his claws. With five of them, Eridians were very good at multitasking.

“If Grace experience muscle weakness and fine motor skill failure from malnutrition on way to Erid, Grace no work Hail Mary when reach orbit and space elevator. Confirm, question?” He asked when he finally spoke.

Grace stopped what he was doing and chewed the tip of his pen. It had only been a few months since Grace had rescued Rocky from the Blip-A floating dead in space, they had a long, long time before they had to really start worrying about that, but Rocky had a great point.

“Uhh…shoot, yeah. You’re right.” He leaned back in his chair, stretching his spine with a few satisfying pops and looking up at the stark white ceiling. “I mean, we could probably reprogram the Hail Mary and mess around with her navigation to do it sort of on autopilot, but that might be a bit risky-”

“Rocky do it!”

Grace looked over at his friend. Rocky was on his feet now, tapping away with his two front claws as he always did when he was going through calculations in his head.

“Rocky I appreciate the thought, but you can’t pilot the Hail Mary from a ball. And the controls would fail in your atmosphere.”

“Rocky no need ball, I make suit. Suit from Xenonite mesh like panel on ball! Small small small panels for dexterity and maneuverability to properly work controls. And tend to Grace when Grace get sick. That part very important. Rocky want to help Grace. Rocky fix.”

Grace was following along pretty well until that last bit. Rocky had done his research on human malnutrition as soon as Grace mentioned rationing his food for the trip, and man, he was not at all happy about it. Grace assumed it was because with all the sleeping he’d end up doing once his body started running out of energy, it reminded him of his old crewmates, how he had watched them fall asleep one by one and never wake up again. Poor Rocky, alone in that massive ship with no one to watch him sleep…the thought always made Grace’s eyes well up.

Like they did right now.

“Rocky, you know we’ve got a while until that starts to become a concern, right? You don’t gotta worry about me just yet,” Grace said, blinking away the moisture in his eyes. Frankly he was touched that Rocky was looking out for him this far in advance. Who was he kidding, Rocky was always looking out for him.

“Yes, but if Rocky make suit now and suit have problem and things go bad bad bad during test, Rocky trust Grace to make sure Rocky safe to try again. Best to test while Grace is healthy.”

Well, he couldn’t argue with that logic.

“Alright, deal,” Grace smiled, putting his fist up to the Xenonite in front of Rocky, and Rocky returned the gesture with his claws making a thud on the clear material. “Just be careful, alright?“

“Rocky promise! Start right away!”

—————————————————————————

It had been a few days since that conversation. Rocky slaved away in his workshop every waking hour of the day. He worked on the suit when he watched Grace sleep, he worked on it as soon as he himself woke up, and every moment in between, only pausing to eat. He wouldn’t even take a break to rewatch Star Trek with Grace, which was one of his favorites! You had to hand it to the guy, he was committed.

And then, after a week of hard, tedious, claw-aching work, it was done. Though, Rocky would take a week of this over a week of chain any day.

Grace had taken a quick trip to the dormitory to retrieve his quilt—the lab got a little chilly sometimes and he was feeling snuggly—before he got an announcement from Mary’s intercom.

“Summons from crewmate Rocky.”

“I left for two seconds,” Grace chuckled to himself before folding the quilt under his arms and making his way back up to the lab.

“Summons from crewmate Rocky.”

“I’m coming, buddy, I’m coming!”

He opened the hatch to a series of excited chirps emanating from behind the Xenonite wall, so high pitched Grace wasn’t even sure if Rocky was actually saying words or if he was just squealing with glee.

And now Grace could see what had his friend so excited. On the other side of the barrier, Rocky was stomping happily inside of a near skin-tight Xenonite spacesuit. It was similar in concept to the one he had made Grace so the human could explore the Blip-A’s interior, but much more maneuverable. Heck, at first it took Grace a moment to notice he was wearing it at all!

Grace beamed as he trotted over, squatting down to get a good look. “Hey, you finished it!”

“Yes yes yes! Ran through many designs, none very comfortable, this design good good good. Is comfortable, and can move claws to work Hail Mary interface and controls. Very important.” Rocky demonstrated by raising his claws in a fist, then separating them and pressing his “palm” against the barrier. “Now just need testing in Grace atmosphere.”

“Well, then what are we waiting for?” Grace asked, grinning at Rocky’s excitement as well as his own. “Oh! Actually, me. Wait for me, I’ll be right back!”

“Where Grace going, question?”

“When you come into my space you’ll be too hot for me to touch, so I’m grabbing the EVA gloves.”

“Ohh make sense, hurry hurry!”

Grace shot Rocky a thumbs down in his departure, leaving at a swift trot as he made his way to the airlock where the EVA suit resided. It took a few minutes, Rocky stomping back and forth impatiently all the while, before Grace returned.

“Alright bud, I’m here, let’s do this.”

“Yes yes yes, let’s!”

Rocky squeezed his way into the little airlock box that the two of them used to pass items back and forth, similar to the one in the tunnel connecting their respective ships when they first met. It took a bit of maneuvering, but he eventually got all his legs to fit comfortably inside. The air inside hissed as it cycled from Rocky’s atmosphere to Grace’s. As soon as it stopped it slid over to Grace’s side of the wall, and Rocky cautiously stepped out.

Both human and Eridian stood silent and still, not unlike how they did as soon as they re-entered Adrian’s orbit before everything went sideways and spinning. Only this time, nothing went wrong. Rocky flexed his claws, stretched all of his limbs out and up one by one, testing each joint of his suit for weaknesses or leaks. Nothing.

“All good?” Grace asked, turning his head and looking cautiously at his friend from the side of his eyes.

Rocky did a few more test bounces up and down with his carapace, before he stomped happily back and forth. “All good! All good good good!”

“Haha! Yes!” Grace whooped, pumping his fists in the air and grinning from ear to ear. Rocky chirped in excitement, spinning in a circle and doing jazz hands. Then Rocky stopped to give an exasperated groan, sounding a bit like a squeaky car brake.

“Rocky want to hug Grace but still too hot,” he whined.

Grace threw his head back and laughed. He put on his EVA gloves and walked over to Rocky to rest his protected palms on the top of his body around his vents. To say the Xenonite was scalding hot would be an understatement, and Grace almost had to pull away from the heat that radiated into his forearms, but he got used to it.

“Here, how’s this for starters,” he asked, masking his grimace with a friendly smile.

Rocky chirped in surprise. “Oh! Can feel! Can feel Grace through suit!” he said.

Grace chuckled. “Yeahah?”

“Yes yes yes!” Rocky chittered, shimmying from side to side as if he could barely contain his excitement. “I like!”

Rocky’s reaction was enough to make the near-burning skin worthwhile a hundred times over.

—————————————————————————

Where Grace went, Rocky went, clunking his way through the halls of the Hail Mary on five legs rather than inside of his ball. Grace had to admit, it was pretty nice having his friend like this. He was a little worried at first that Rocky having full access to the ship would cause some personal space problems and get him a little peeved, but honestly all annoyance was gone.

“Is Rocky cool enough for hug now, question?”

Well, there was that. But Grace couldn’t even be mad, the fact that Rocky was so excited for his first real hug but careful to not hurt Grace was beyond heartwarming.

Grace chuckled and hovered his bare hand over the Xenonite, just like he did ten minutes ago. Man, this stuff took ages to cool down.

“Not yet buddy, almost there though.”

They continued their endeavors.

“Is Rocky cool enough for hug now, question?”

“Oh my god…”

It took another forty minutes for the xenonite to cool down to a degree where it wouldn’t be uncomfortable. Sure, Grace could’ve put his EVA suit on, but selfishly he didn’t want to. The suit was bulky and annoying to put on in 1.5g’s, and call him sappy but he wanted to feel Rocky as completely as he could when he held him close after all this time. It was his first hug, after all, it had to be special.

And then, after so much waiting—months of it now, really, ever since Grace hugged Rocky’s ball that first time—it happened. Grace figured it out on accident, simply walking by Rocky in the dormitory and giving his head a gentle pat as he passed, and Rocky leaned into his hand as if they had done it a hundred times.

Then they both paused.

Rocky raised his carapace, practically buzzing with excitement. “Grace?”

Grace looked at his unburned palm, then to Rocky, and smiled. “Rocky cool enough for hug now, statement,” he beamed.

Rocky squealed so high pitched Grace thought it would shatter the computer screens, stomping happily with all his legs and wiggling back and forth. Then, with his legs momentarily scuffing along the ground, he launched himself at Grace, his front two arms outstretched.

Grace didn’t have half a second to prepare, scrambling backwards to try and cushion the blow, before Rocky had collided with him and he was knocked flat on his back.

“Woah! Woahwoahwoah Rocky—ouf!”

The wind was briefly knocked out of him from the impact, but then he laughed. He laughed and laughed as he sat up the best he could and held Rocky close, squeezing the alien against his chest. He didn’t even care that his breath was a little restricted from the pressure of Rocky’s arms around his ribcage. Tears of pure joy began to fall from his eyes, which he squeezed closed to just feel Rocky in his arms.

Rocky was singing, the sound almost like a whimper but more joyful. He was trembling a little. The first time Grace had heard this sound from Rocky it was when the Eridian had stepped foot back on the Hail Mary for the first time after his rescue. Keening, he had called it. He had explained it as a behavior akin to human crying, a release of great emotion. Very common in pebbles, but every Eridian did it from time to time.

In short, in their own respects, Grace and Rocky were both crying from joy at just being able to hug the other.

“Rocky…like hug…” Rocky said through keens, his voice a little warbled from emotion.

“Me too,” Grace replied, pressing his cheek into the hard surface that gave him more comfort than he’d experienced since he first woke up from his coma. Wow, he didn’t realized how starved for affectionate touch he really was.

“Rocky love love love Grace.”

Grace sobbed a wet laugh, squeezing his best friend closer still. “I love love love you too, buddy,” he said through his tears. “God, I love you so much.”

—————————————————————————

If Rocky and Grace were attached at the hip before, they may as well be one organism now.

The fact that they could properly touch had done wonders to the both of them. Both species were incredibly social, and as such physical contact was important for bonding.

And boy, did the two of them utilize it.

Head pats in passing, brushing against legs, resting against shoulders, you name it. Given Rocky’s reaction to that first hug all that time ago, Grace was shocked to find he was actually a super touchy-feely guy. He was constantly near Grace, brushing a claw or leaning his carapace on Grace as he watched him work.

And the sleeping situation had improved exponentially! Rocky, god bless him, was a snuggler. Perfect for Grace because Grace was also a snuggler. That first night when Grace settled down for bed, Rocky leapt right up onto the cot like an overgrown cat and curled up perfectly in the crook of Grace’s side. When Grace huffed a small chuckle and slung his arm over Rocky’s carapace, it was as if he always belonged there.

Oh! And the science part of it! Oughhhhh the science part!! They could now study the body of the other, take notes, see what made them tick, better than ever!

They set it up in the Don’t Go Crazy room, since they didn’t need any lab equipment, just a pen and notepad for Grace. Besides, if they did anything with reflexes and one of them ended up kicking the spectrometer or something, it would be a very expensive whoops.

Even though Rocky was an engineer, being around so many scientists before they…you know…gave him a curiosity around the topic that he didn’t have on Erid. Not only that, but he definitely needed to know how Grace’s body worked if he was going to optimize his survival as he ran out of food. If Armando could keep Grace alive, at least Rocky could help keep him comfortable and not alone.

But enough of the melancholy, they had learning to do!

Grace offered to go first, given Rocky’s concern about his body being the topic that led to the invention of the new Xenonite suit. Rocky wiggled happily from side to side in said suit, evidently enjoying his newfound freedom and the offer of getting to explore the alien anatomy. He scuttled right next to Grace, making sure to be cautious of his claws lest he step on and possibly break Grace’s legs.

The Eridian made a move to reach out, curious as ever, before he hesitated. The claws within the xenonite glove tapped against one another in an anxious fidget. Grace furrowed his brow. Rocky didn’t have eyes to follow to what had made him stop, but the way the concave face of his carapace was angled at the multitude of burn scars on the flesh of his left arm and the neat little claw-print on his right let Grace know that that was what he was worried about.

He gave his friend a small, sad smile, dipping his head a little to look at him square. “Rocky…”

“Rocky not want to hurt Grace again.” Rocky crooned, curling in on himself a little. “Scarring bad bad bad. Know it was to save Grace, save Rocky, but still hurt.”

“It won’t hurt me bud,” Grace insisted. “You know as well as I do how insulated your Xenonite is, it’ll be comfortably warm at most. Besides, we’ve hugged a good couple of times, remember? And it’s all been fine then.”

“Rocky can’t forget, but mesh most fragmented and thin at claws. Best design for dexterity.” He flexed said claws as he spoke, clacking them together in his nervous tic. “What if mesh break, question?”

Grace snorted, rubbing the top of Rocky’s carapace with his knuckles. That was one of his favorite things about Rocky’s new suit, getting to give him an affectionate noogie every once in a while. Well, one of his favorite things besides the hugs. Rocky gave some really great hugs.

“With your engineering? Not likely. You’re overthinking. And if it does, I run to the EVA suit, get you back into your ball, and we figure it out from there. I won’t let anything bad happen, buddy.”

Rocky hesitated for a moment before raising his carapace towards his friend. “Promise, question?”

“Promise, statement.”

With Grace’s assurance, Rocky tentatively reached out a claw once more. Xenonite-covered armor found the skin of Grace’s side, just under where his ribcage ended, and simply rested there for a moment. Rocky was gentle, so much so that Grace almost urged him to use more pressure so he could better hear and feel the human body under his claw. This was a bit of a biology lesson, after all.

Then Rocky’s claws squeezed once, twice, three times in rapid succession as he gave a curious trill, cocking his carapace to the side and clicking to get a better view, and Grace discovered quickly he had something else to add to his “Who Am I?” board.

He, Doctor Captain Ryland Grace, the world’s leading authority in astrophage biology and one of the saviors of Erid and (hopefully) Earth, was ticklish.

Really, really ticklish.

The reaction was immediate. A bark of shocked laughter leapt from his throat without his permission, and he squirmed away with a wobbly smile.

Rocky, on the other hand, found this no laughing matter. He let out a series of sharp alarmed whistles and scrambled back. “Apology! Apology! Apology! Rocky hurt Grace! Suit malfunction! Apology! Bad bad bad!” he rambled in a panic, curling his legs under himself and pressing his two front limbs together, dipping his carapace behind them.

“Woah woah hey, easy there pal, you’re okay!” Grace rushed to assure him, reaching out a hand to usher him back. When Rocky stepped further away, Grace wasted no time in lifting up his shirt so Rocky could see where he had touched him. “Look! It’s not red, the skin isn’t irritated, you didn’t hurt me! You just tickled me, that’s all, no harm no foul. You’re okay. We’re okay.”

After several moments hesitation, Rocky crept closer, his body still low to the ground. The sight made Grace’s heart break a little bit. Man, their adventures in Tau Ceti’s system really messed the two of them up, didn’t they?

When Rocky was close enough, Grace put a hand on top of his carapace. Rocky leaned into it with low chitters. With his other hand he took Rocky’s claw, the one that Rocky believed had burned him. He shook it back and forth in a silly way to show his anxious alien friend how harmless it was.

“See? The suit doesn’t burn, and you were very gentle. You didn’t hurt me, bud,” Grace soothed, curling and relaxing his fingers to gently scratch at Rocky’s vents through his suit. Rocky seemed to like it, taking a step closer still while the tension in his body slowly subsided.

“Rocky not want to hurt Grace.” he finally said, his voice low. “Grace very important to Rocky. Rocky not forgive self if cause Grace pain like that again.”

Gosh darn it, Grace was not going to cry right now. He straight up refused.

“Oh, buddy, come here,” Grace sighed sadly, scooting close to Rocky and pulling him into his arms. Rocky pressed his carapace against the man’s chest and sang low and soft, wrapping two arms around Grace’s middle.

“You’re important to me, too. More than I’ll ever be able to put into words.” He pulled away slightly to look at Rocky square, dipping his head as if forcing the eyeless creature to meet his gaze. “There’s nothing, and I mean nothing, you could do to me that I wouldn’t be able to forgive you for. All these…?” He gestured at his burn scars, “were gotten out of love. You loved me enough to risk your life to drag me to safety,” he pointed to the raised claw-print, “and I loved you enough to risk my life bringing you to your own atmosphere so you could heal,” he ended by rubbing his fingertips up and down the gnarly skin.

“Don’t disservice the both of us by chalking all these up to just pain. We fought hard to keep each other alive, and these are marks of that. Okay?”

Rocky nodded his carapace, a human mannerism he had picked up from his friend. “If Rocky were human, would probably be leaking right now. Very very leaky.”

Grace laughed, giving Rocky one last squeeze for good measure. “Ready to try again?” he asked, tapping Rocky’s carapace twice with the question. An Eridian mannerism he had picked up from his friend.

“Yes yes yes, feel better now.”

“Good!”

Rocky put his claw right back where it was, then paused once more. “Can Grace explain new word before continue, question?”

“New word, new word…” he wracked his brain, but it came up empty.

“What Grace say Rocky do when Grace flinch away from touch. Scare Rocky.”

“Oh! Yes, got it. So that was something called tickling. I’m not sure if you guys have a word for it, but basically it’s my body’s response to unexpected external stimuli.” Grace began. “It’s hypothesized that knismesis, which is a lesser, more itchy sensation, was evolved to detect insects or small parasites on the skin, while gargalesis, which is what I just experienced, is a more extreme reaction that elicites laughter and is linked to the fight or flight response. Though, no one’s really sure why that bit of it evolved. Maybe for social bonding through play, maybe to protect vulnerable parts of the body in combat, there’s a bunch of theories that no one can really prove for sure,” he finished with a shrug.

Did he know all this from doing a deep dive on ticklishness after learning rats could be ticklish in one of his science classes?

Yes. Yes, he did.

“You squeezed my side, which is a common ticklish spot, so my body moved away from the stimuli, being your claw, and made me laugh. Does that make sense?”

Rocky hums in acknowledgment. “Yes, make sense. Eridians have similar response to stimuli. Speculated to detect parasites and social bonding, same as humans. All Eridians ticklish. All humans ticklish, question?”

Grace filed that information away for later before shaking his head. “Not all of us, but most are.”

“Understand. Back to anatomy study now, question?”

“Yeah, we got a little sidetracked,” Grace chuckled.

Grace leaned back on his hands, his legs criss-crossed in front of him as he let Rocky do his thing once more, though this time there was a bit of an anticipatory smile pulling at his lips. Instead of resting his claw on Grace’s side like before, Rocky had opted for the chest approach this time, and Grace could only assume he was hearing past his ribcage and into the organs inside.

“Internal muscle pulsing and two others expanding with Grace breath. Heart and lungs, question?”

Grace gave him a thumbs up. “Ding ding ding, we got a winner!” he grinned. “Our respiratory systems are completely different from each other, but my heart and circulatory system works similarly to yours, except my heart pumps iron-based blood while yours is mercury, and I only have one while you have five. Make sense?”

“Yes yes yes. What bones made of, question?” Rocky asked, his claw trailing down to the human’s ribcage. It was hard to the touch, but Rocky was still incredibly careful.

The anticipation was back again, but Grace couldn’t really pinpoint why. Rocky had barely touched him, he couldn’t be that ticklish, could he? Maybe it was a fluke, a kneejerk reaction to his body not being properly touched in so long—

Squeeze squeeze.

Nope, definitely ticklish.

“CaHAlcium!” Grace yelped, cut off mid-answer by a rather obnoxious cackle. He cleared his throat, giving Rocky’s carapace a reassuring pat with one hand and covering his mouth with the other. “Sorry, calcium.”

Rocky didn’t retract his claw in fear this time (progress!) but he did still all movement and cocked his carapace. “Tickle response, question?”

“Yeah, heh. Yeah.”

“Heart rate elevated,” Rocky stated.

Grace gave a small laugh. “Part of said tickle response,” he said. “Like I said, it’s connected to our fight or flight instinct, which makes our body pump out adrenaline, which then increases our heart rate. It’s really cool actually, sometimes humans can get this crazy rush of adrenaline in life or death situations and get this insane stre-hehaha hehey!”

He was interrupted by his own frantic stammering when Rocky squeezed at his ribs again. Then the little rascal laughed at him, his trilling chirps sneakily squeaking through his vents!

“Hey! Are you doing that on purpose?” Grace asked, knitting his brows together and waggling an accusing finger at his friend.

“Mmmm. No.” Squeeze squeeze squeeze.

“You ahahahare you so are!” Grace couldn’t help but succumb to his giggles, tilting his head back with a wide grin and swatting at the offending claw. At least it was only one, and it was gentle-

Oh fudge there’s another one. There’s another claw.

Rocky had reached across with a second arm and began squeezing at the same spot on his other side. He gave a series of high pitched giggling chirps as he stepped over Grace’s lap, effectively pinning him to his spot on the walkway of the Don’t Go Crazy room. And, given his bulk and Grace’s already suffering abs from laughing, it took very little time for Grace to lie back on the ground as Rocky took him apart.

“W-wahahahahait nohohoho! Rockyhehehehe!” He wriggled and shoved at his friend’s carapace, unable to stop the peals of laughter forced from him at Rocky’s touch.

Rocky ceased his tickle attack and sat back on three of his five legs. “Rocky cause discomfort, question?”

Grace pushed himself back to sitting, leaning back on one hand while rubbing at the ghost tickles on his ribs with the other. He shook his head with a smile. “Noho, bud yohou’re oka-“

“Then Rocky continue tickle Grace!”

“W-wait whahaHAHAHAT?!”

Grace considered himself lucky Rocky was conscious of his weight and balance. If he wasn’t using his other three legs to keep himself steady and his center of balance secure, Grace wasn’t sure if he could handle any more claws sneaking in to tickle him. Rocky was ruthless!

Wriggling claws found their way under his arms, making him clamp his elbows to his sides in a futile attempt to block the attack. One claw relinquished in favor of squeezing at an elbow, which gave Grace a small but appreciated break at least on that side of his body. Rocky must have noticed the lack of reaction and opted to squeeze and pinch at his hips and knees instead. He definitely got his reaction there, Grace shrieked and bucked his hips with such intensity that had Rocky not been so heavy it might’ve thrown him off.

The more logical part of his brain noted the assault focused mainly on his joints, which must be common tickle spots for Eridians. However, the rest of his brain was too focused on being tickled absolutely stupid to care about that little tidbit.

Grace was in absolute hysterics. His brain had all but turned to mush, his eyes squeezed shut and his mouth agape with boisterous laughter. He couldn’t remember the last time he had laughed this hard, if ever.

“Okahahahay okay! Rocky time ohohohout pahahahause plehehehease!” He pleaded, swatting Rocky’s claws in a pitiful attempt to fight the Eridian off. Rocky took mercy on him and complied with his request for a “time out” without hesitation. Grace pushed himself back up with heavy limbs, leaning back on his elbows and getting out the rest of his titters.

“Humans not have tickle spot like Eridian,” Rocky noted, pointing at Grace’s elbow. “Not ticklish, question? Is common Eridian spot.”

Grace looked at Rocky over his glasses with a raised brow, his head slightly bowed as he recovered from the playful attack. “Noho. No, because we have no vital organs there.”

“Then why is leg joint more ticklish than arm joint, question?”

Grace shrugged. “My guess is because humans are built for running, so our legs need more ‘training’ in avoiding injury.” He put the word “training” in air quotes. “That’s just my theory though. Everyone’s got areas that are more ticklish than others, like I said it’s up to a lot of speculation.”

Rocky hummed and wiggled his carapace as he digested the information. “Understand.” Then he went still, clicking and chirping away and tapping a claw against the ground. “So…humans commonly most ticklish where many vital organs are inside.”

“Correct.”

He pointed a claw at his friend’s stomach. “Rocky hear many organs here.”

Immediately Grace felt butterflies go absolutely ballistic in his belly. If that was any indication, he could piece two and two together that he was probably really ticklish there, even if he didn’t remember.

If he could, he would have shoved his foot so far in his big mouth it’d be seen where the sun doesn’t shine.

His body moved before his brain caught up, scooting back on his hands and his mouth forced into a giddy grin. Again, not a good sign. “R-Rockyhehehehe, c’mohon man-“

“Rocky learn human anatomy, must touch to hear beneath skin, Grace be still!” Rocky chirped, and Grace didn’t miss for a second the amused lilt that was ever present in his friend’s voice. The little bugger was having way too much fun at his expense.

Grace did not, in fact, be still. Grace had preferred to scramble to his feet and put said running legs to use. Well, he would have if Rocky hadn’t all but tackled him back to the ground. Grace was on his back again, staring wide eyed at his captor with a goofy smile on his face.

“Nohohoho wahait let’s talk we can talk about this Rocky plehehehease!”

Rocky said nothing. Granted, Grace wasn’t actually sure if he could speak through his squeaky giggles. He raised his claws in the air and scrunched them in and out. Oh god, that made it so much worse! And he had started to lower them to his stomach!

“NONONONO dohohon’t do it! Dohon’t doho ihihihit ROCKYHEHEHE-!”

Increasingly desperate pleas fell on impossibly deaf ears (jerk) as Rocky’s claws finally touched down. Well, crashed down was more accurate, for they had made contact on his stomach with such sudden ferocity that Grace honest to god screamed before trailing off into wheezes. Wheezes then turned into cackling belly laughter once he finally got a breath in.

“ROCKY!!! RohockyheHEHEHE NOHOT THEHEHEHERE!” Grace howled through his laughter, his flailing arms trying and failing to push Rocky off of him and defend his middle all at once.

He was very briefly reminded of the last time he was pinned to the ground in similar fashion, but instead of desperate sobs to spare his life, all that was driven from his mouth was giddy, carefree laughter as Rocky tickled him to pieces. It was honestly a little refreshing from the horrid memory.

Rocky was a little monster. He was trilling and giggling and whistling in a way that was reminiscent of cooing at something cute. Grace thought might actually die. From embarrassment or from being tickled to death, he wasn’t sure. Most likely a mix of the two.

“Grace! Be! Still!” Rocky reiterated, intensifying a squeeze with each whistling word. He was absolutely evil! His technique even more so! He squeezed and pinched and poked and skittered erratically with no rhyme or reason, swapping tactics in a way that drove his cackling victim up a wall.

The final nail in the coffin, though, was when Rocky had discovered the effectiveness of sticking his hands under Grace’s shirt and vibrating his curled claws rapidly back and forth. In all the months they’d known each other, the last and only time he’d heard Grace this loud was their first real meeting when Grace had shrieked with fear, wielding a wrench.

Now, under much sillier circumstances, Rocky was positively enamored with the joyful noise coming from his squishy companion under his claws. He could hear the surface of his smile, his nose wrinkled and scrunched, his brows furrowed and his eyes screwed shut with mirthful tears pricking at the corners, his glasses crooked on his face as he shook his head back and forth. And best of all, his laughter. Bright and happy and contagious even to a complete different species. Second only to his mate’s song, it was definitely Rocky’s favorite sound.

However, to both Rocky’s dismay and understanding, Grace could only take it for so long. In all seriousness, human adrenaline and stamina was something to be admired, but he was definitely reaching his limit.

“OHOHOHOH MY GOD OKAHAHAY!” he yelled, clutching his stomach and kicking his legs in the air as if trying to run from the ticklish touches. “ENOUGHENOUGHENOUGH UHUNCLE! UHUHUHUNCLE HAHAHAHAHA MEHEHERCYHEHEHEHE!!!”

Rocky scuttled off with incredibly fond giggles, perching by Grace’s head to fix his glasses and give him space to breathe. He carded his claws gently through the blond hair as Grace fought to regain his bearings. His chest heaved, his shoulders shaking with leftover breathless giggles.

“Yohohohou,” he huffed, pointing a floppy hand at the Eridian, “ahahare awfuhul!”

“And you are stuck on Hail Mary with Rocky for next four years,” Rocky quipped back through pleased chirrups.

“Bite me.”

“Rocky cannot bite, not have mouth.“

“Ihit’s a joke, bud.”

“Ah, understand.”

Jeez, he felt like he had just run a marathon. His abs hurt, his face was sore, his throat was hoarse. Rocky had really did a number on him. But despite all that, he couldn’t deny the pleasant buzz of dopamine in his brain from the physical exertion and all the laughter.

“God, I’m living with a flipping tickle monster,” he cleared his throat and groaned, rubbing his eyes under his glasses.

“Grace okay, question?”

“Oh yeahaha, pal, I’m all good.” More than all good, actually. Thinking back on the past few days filled with meal prep and rationing math and dread, he needed that. A good tussle was exactly what the doctor ordered. Even if it was pretty one-sided.

Rocky nudged Grace with his carapace once the human finally got his breath back. “Rocky turn next, question?”

Grace sat up and looked at Rocky with a quirked brow and crooked smile. “Yohou want me to tickle you back?” he asked, a chuckle lacing his voice. In all honesty Grace was planning some thorough revenge anyways, but he wasn’t expecting Rocky to ask for it outright!

“Yes yes yes,” Rocky chirped, doing his little jazz hands in place. “Grace want to learn Eridian biology, and tickle is bonding between good good good friends! Play, silly, happy happy happy for Grace and Rocky.”

Grace smiled from ear to ear. Oh, this guy had no idea what he’d just unleashed upon himself.

If Ryland Grace was anything, he was competitive. He wouldn’t let that moron with a doctorate tell him water was always necessary for life to evolve, he wouldn’t back down when Lokkens tried her best to convince him Earth life and astrophage evolved from completely different root species, and now he definitely wasn’t letting Rocky get off the hook for tickling him within an inch of his life.

“Are you sure about this, Rock?” He sing-songed. “Because I’m not going easy on you.”

“Rocky tough, Rocky take it!” the Eridian beside him whistled, sticking out his carapace boldly.

Oohohoh, challenge accepted buddy.

He curled his fingers into wiggly claws and tried his best to make his smile look more predatory, but he knew he just looked like a dork. He could live with that, he was happy to be goofing around with his best friend, dang it. “Your funeral!”

Grace gave Rocky zero buildup. No test squeezes, no pokes or taps, no trying to hide his intentions, just immediately digging aggressively into Rocky’s joints.

The pitch at which Rocky squealed was almost painful to his ears, but Grace was too giddy to care. He grabbed onto one of Rocky’s flailing limbs and pulled himself closer, curling his legs criss-cross-applesauce around his giggling friend.

“So, you wanna tell me where Eridians are most ticklish?” He asked, as casually as if he was having a normal conversation. He had to raise his voice a little bit over Rocky’s laughter. “You already told me about riiiiiight here!” He grabbed two of Rocky’s elbow joints and squeezed rapidly through the Xenonite mesh. Rocky did his best to scuttle away through shrill cackles, but only ended up tipping himself backwards onto his side, his legs flopping and flailing and looking for all the world like a mix between a spider and a turtle stuck on its back.

“Ohoh no you don’t!” Grace growled, getting onto his knees and reaching forward to follow Rocky’s momentum. He stuck his hands flat on Rocky’s sideways carapace, looming over him and grinning. “Spill it! Where else?”

“Grace….find out….for yourself!” Rocky challenged through his squeaky tittering.

Grace’s grin got impossibly wider as he curled his fingers, making Rocky squeal and his legs scrunch in anticipation. “Ohhhhhkay, you’re asking for it now!”

Caution of getting his fingers pinched to the wind, he clawed at the joints where Rocky’s arms met his body, where his “armpit” would be, and Rocky went absolutely berserk. He squirmed and flailed and cackled. It sort of sounded as if someone was shriek-laughing into one of the recorders the Grover-Cleveland music room used to have. Grace used to hate hearing that squeaky sound through the halls when the kids first learned to play the instrument, but now this similar sounding song was music to his ears.

“Soooooo I’m guessing the elbows and leg joints because that’s where parasites can get in, right?” Grace asked as he continued to take his friend apart. Said friend couldn’t speak through his cackling. Or, maybe he could, but it was so intermingled with his laughter that Grace or the translator couldn’t pick it up.

So, he slowed down a bit, letting Rocky get a breather in. His vents were steaming a little bit from the exertion. All that movement and laughter must’ve been a little taxing on his body. Another similarity between humans and Eridians.

Grace huffed an affectionate laugh through his nose, scratching gently at the top of Rocky’s carapace in a soothing way rather than a tickly one. He didn’t want to overwhelm the poor guy. Or worse, send him into an unexpected slumber before he ate.

“Did you hear me, bud?” He asked, tapping twice. It was a normal behavior, but those two taps made Rocky squeak and giggle.

“Yes…Rocky hear…apology…need moment,” Rocky huffed, still tittering a little all the while.

“No worries, pal, take all the time you need,” Grace said, resorting from scratching to just rubbing the flat of his palm and pads of his fingers along the tip of the Xenonite suit. Rocky trilled, leaning as much as he could into it from his lopsided position.

“Alright buddy, on your feet,” Grace chuckled, bracing his feet against the floor and holding Rocky’s claws to pull him right-side up while Rocky pushed with his back legs. Rocky didn’t leave his position in Grace’s lap, though, he just curled his legs underneath him and settled right there.

“Okay, recover now,” Rocky announced. “Answer to Grace question is yes. Eridian joints much much much ticklish because easiest for parasites to enter body. Bad bad bad. But also limbs are place most touched by other Eridians. Sensory input from external stimuli aid in social interaction and bonding between individuals.”

Grace nodded along. “Gotcha. Not so different, are we pal?” He smiled fondly, tapping twice once more with his question on the top of Rocky’s carapace.

Once more came the giggling, making Grace smile in his endearment. “Whahat is going on, you’re never this giggly when I do that,” he asked, unable to help the laughter weaving in between his words.

“Grace tickle Rocky within minutes of deep sleep! Still tickle! Vibrations from question tap tickle!” Rocky said indignantly, poking Grace in the stomach and making him yelp and squirm.

“Okahay! OkAHAhahay I gehet it! My bahahad!” He laughed, holding the offending claw with one hand and clutching at his stomach with the other.

Rocky ceased his attack, giggling and swinging Grace’s hand back and forth like Grace had done with him several minutes before while looking rather pleased with himself.

“One of these days I’ll have to introduce you to the long-standing earth tradition of tickle fights,” Grace said with a smile, tapping Rocky’s carapace a little more to make him squirm. “We’d have to do it in zero G, though, otherwise you’d win by a long shot.”

“Yes yes yes, Rocky win fight. Much stronger than leaky space blob!”

“Yeah? Well I’m faster,” Grace retorted. “I could run you down any day of the week. I gotta teach you about persistence hunting one of these days.” An idea was quickly coming to mind on how that’s go down, a smile already curling his lips at the prospect.

“Faster not help when Rocky have Grace like this!”

Grace shrieked as Rocky’s claws shoved at his shoulders and pinned him down again, descending upon his belly once more shortly after and immediately eliciting cries for surrender. “AAAHAHAHA OKAY OKAY YOU WIN!!! YOU WIHIHIN GET OHOHOFFA MEHEHEHEHEHE!”

Rocky took mercy on him quick, thankfully, backing off with smug giggles and helping Grace back up.

“Nohoho…noho more for today, alright? I’m beat,” Grace giggled, waving his hand back and forth and shaking his head with a smile still plastered on his face.

“Yes yes yes, Grace sleep, Rocky watch!” Rocky chirped happily. They gathered the translator and notebook (the pen had been kicked off of the walkway in the scuffle and was long gone), and made their way to the dormitory.

It was a routine that took very little time to fall into. Grace changed into his pajamas and brushed his teeth with Rocky giving him his privacy as normal, Grace settling into bed and getting cozy under the covers as normal, and then lifting up the quilt so Rocky could hop up and settle down to watch, which was their new normal. Grace even kept the room a little cooler than the rest of the ship, so he wouldn’t overheat with Rocky snuggled up next to him.

Rocky curled three of five limbs comfortably underneath his carapace, the other two left free to wander and keep busy as Grace slept. One drifted up to run through Grace’s hair, while the other splayed across his chest.

“You know,” Grace said after a moment, a yawn following his voice, “I think this is one of your best ideas to date,” he smiled. Sure, the idea to eat the Taumoeba may end up saving his life, hopefully, but he was pretty sure this whole being able to touch thing saved his heart and soul. He couldn’t believe he and Rocky had gone so long without a proper hug.

Rocky chirped in amusement, his frequency rumbling deep into Grace’s chest. “Grace stupid from little sleep and too much tickles,” he said, and Grace could recognize his tone as incredibly fond. It made his chest feel fuzzy with affection. Still can’t take a compliment. One more thing they had in common. “Grace sleep, I watch.”

“Good night, Rocky.”

“Good night, Grace.”

[as-the-crows-feather-falls]

We love deleting half a fucking fic I had qued up

[just-another-t-word-blog]

Eridian Lullaby

A Project Hail Mary fanfic

Summary: Ryland Grace can’t sleep. Rocky is very confused by this and wants to help

⚠️⛔️ WARNING⛔️⚠️ this is a tickle fic! No likey no readie! Thank you 💙

⚠️⛔️SPOILER WARNING⛔️⚠️ takes place about 2/3rd through the book or halfway through the movie!!

You would think that space, being silent, would be a phenomenal place to sleep.

There was no air outside for sound to travel through and the sounds of the Hail Mary were negligible after months of exposure. The only sounds to occasionally catch Grace's attention were that of his roommate, who still insisted on watching him sleep.

"Eridian culture".

The new "because I said so".

Grace huffed, turning to his side and tightly cocooning his blanket around his shoulders.

Despite the seemingly optimal conditions (and going to bed over two hours ago), sleep still hadn't come.

He tried counting sheep, only for his mind to wander as soon as it got bored.

He tried meditating, but the silence was way too loud.

He tried remembering all the elements of the periodic table in numerical order. Then when that was too easy, alphabetical order.

This was silly. He felt silly.

I can identify single-cell star-eating organisms, be kidnapped from my everyday life to help save humanity, get launched into space, survive an induced coma, and only cry a little bit about it, but I can't make myself fall asleep?

After his attempt at deep-pressure soothing via his thin blanket, Grace rolled to his back, flopping his arms to the sides with a dramatic sigh.

Maybe Armando would have warm milk if he asked?

Heavy footfalls and the clinking of a xenonite hamster ball approached.

Great. Grace thought. My nanny is here.

He had kept his eyes closed through all his attempts, but hadn't tried to mask his breathing or sounds of frustration. He knew Rocky would hear him regardless.

"Grace okay, question?" Rocky asked, his musical voice spoken over by the translator.

He opened his eyes, rolling his head to look at him. His carapace was tilted as if looking up at him, the stoney surface showing more emotion than it should.

"Yeah... Yeah, I'm alright." Grace said. He rubbed the bridge of his nose, sitting up and crossing his legs underneath him.

The spin drive was active, a test in the lab needing to be run "overnight". Sleeping in gravity was nicer anyways, more natural feeling.

Grace had half a mind to give up on sleeping and just get back to work. If he couldn't rest, he might as well be productive.

"Why Grace not sleep, question? Rocky too loud, question?" Rocky asked, concern in his voice. Or, at least, what Grace had begun to interpret as concern.

"No, you're not being too loud." Grace said, shaking his head. "It's my brain that's too loud."

Rocky made a curious noise, his front legs tapping excitedly. "Humans can hear brain? Amaze!"

Grace held up a hand, chuckling. "No, I can't really hear my brain. I can think in words and sounds, but I can't hear the tissue."

Rocky tilted again, seeming to understand.

"I mean, my brain is busy. Too many thoughts."

Rocky thought for a moment, rocking his hamster ball back and forth.

They had talked about their biological differences enough that they both somewhat understood what "sleep" meant for one other. For Rocky, it was more of an involuntary hard shut-down than what humans had, Grace having to explain circadian rhythm a few times before it clicked.

Being unable to sleep was something briefly brought up, but Rocky hadn't seen until now.

The Eridian looked around the room, thinking.

"Rocky help, question?" He asked. "Don't know how, but Grace show."

Grace hummed, trying to think if they shared enough biology for sleep tricks to be shareable. It was hard to say, but not necessarily impossible.

"I'm assuming you wont let me go back to work without sleeping first?" Grace said, leaning his head on his hand. Rocky shook his carapace.

"Must sleep. Sleep important, statement. Human stupid without sleep."

Well, he wasn't wrong.

Grace sighed, nodding slowly.

"We can try. Any ideas?"

Rocky paused before shaking again. "No. Human sleep different from Eridian sleep. What help humans sleep, question?"

"Generally," Grace started, fidgeting with his hands. "There's a few known tricks. Counting things in your head, clearing your mind, moving your pillow to the other end of the bed, warm drinks. Some even recommend pretending to be asleep, funny enough."

Rocky nodded, taking it all in.

He raised his hands, looking between them as his fingers twitched like he did when working something out.

He looked up.

"Thirty-four." Rocky said, nodding definitively.

Grace paused.

"Thirty-four what, buddy?"

"Things in your head. Thirty-four. Twenty-eight teeth, one tongue, two eyes, one nose, two ears. Thirty-four things in your head." Rocky said, trailing off in confusion when Grace laughed. The human flopped to his back on his mattress, sighing.

"Grace sleep now, question?" Rocky said, hopeful. He looked up at him eagerly, front legs straightened to peak over the edge of the bed. Grace shook his head.

"I meant counting objects or animals to tire your brain out." He said, grinning.

Rocky let out an embarrassed hum, sitting with a loud thunk. "Strange... Understand."

Grace stared to the ceiling, thinking.

"Music helps sometimes. What does music sound like on Erid?"

Rocky paused, thinking.

"Need new word."

Grace sat up, leaning for the nearby laptop. Even with their growing shared vocabulary, he kept it nearby just in case.

"Music is..."

Huh.

How do you describe music?

"Its like, sounds and words to a rhythm, meant to sound pretty?" He tried, hoping it was enough to get close.

"Sound that tells stories?" Rocky asked. "Makes emotion, question?"

"Exactly!" Grace said, finding a slot to create the new word.

"Eridian word is 🎶." He said, the musical tone resonating.

Grace entered the word, nodding thoughtfully.

"What does Eridian music sound like?" He said, setting the laptop aside and turning to him.

"It sound beautiful! Like Eridian word, but longer..." Rocky said, his tone sounding unsure. "Need more words but don't know what words."

Grace laughed. "It's okay, I think I understand."

He reached to the laptop, pulling up some audio recording software.

"Can you sing something for me? I want to hear it."

Rocky tilted again. "Need new word."

"Its when you make music with your voice."

Rocky started, suddenly nervous. He stood, rolling his ball to move back from Grace.

"Rocky is bad at music. Bad, bad, bad." He said, scuttling back and forth as if anxious.

"It can't be that bad! Just something short, I'm really curious." Grace insisted, offering a sincere smile.

"Grace sing first!" He said, stomping a foot into the xenonite.

Now, it was Grace's turn to be nervous. "Oh, no. I'm very bad at singing. Totally tone deaf, actually!" He said, flushing slightly.

"Don't know those words. Grace sing first or Rocky not sing." Rocky said, grumbling.

Grace raised his hands in surrender, blush deepening at the insistence. "Fine, no one's singing today!"

Grace crossed his arms, tapping his fingers as he leaned back against the wall. Stage fright, he guessed, was also a strange universal phenomenon.

"Maybe I just need some exercise or something. Run my body to exhaustion so I can conk out." Grace said idly.

Rocky perked up. "Idea!"

He rolled closer, tapping his legs. "Rocky and Grace play game, question?"

"Game?" Grace said, quirking an eyebrow. "What kind of game?"

Rocky gestured wildly, his voice excited. "Exercise game! Need new word, Eridian game. Players try to keep each other on floor?"

Grace immediately understood.

"Wrestling?" He typed it into the translator as Rocky gave his version. "Like, two people fighting, but not to hurt each other?"

Rocky nodded. Grace chuckled.

"Rocky, you would win. You're much heavier than me."

"Yes, yes, yes! Rocky heavy, make Grace tired fast!" He backed up, making space between them and waving Grace over, offering to let him have the first move.

He did have a point.

"You're also in a ball. You could just run me over."

Rocky scuttled his legs rapidly, trilling. "Rocky will play fair. Trust! Come fight Rocky, squishy human!"

Grace chuckled at his enthusiasm, shrugging and throwing his legs over the edge of the bed. "Okay, just be careful. I'm pretty sure you could snap my bones if you wanted to."

Rocky made a sound akin to laughter, moving into an overblown fighting stance. He stretched his legs in a slow pattern around himself, steps wide like a five-legged cowboy in a quickdraw match.

"Rocky will be careful."

Rocky suddenly lurched forward, making Grace yelp as he latched onto his ankles through the "mesh" front section of the xenonite ball. With a tug, he dragged Grace off of his bed with surprising ease.

Grace winced as he crashed to the floor before yelping as Rocky tried to clamber on top of him. He kicked, connecting with the ball and rolling it backwards a few feet as the Eridian scrambled within to regain his footing. Grace rolled to his front, crawling on all fours to gain some distance as his friend charged again, knocking him onto his side.

Grace gasped as he fell, feet flailing to gain purchase to escape. On his side, he couldn't get very fair before Rocky rolled into his chest, making him lie flat on the floor as he climbed up to stand on top of him. The human took a moment to regain his breath before struggling again, cringing as Rocky rapidly shot out his arms to adjust the ball with every movement.

With how Rocky looked when he ran and skittered, Grace was very glad he didn't have too bad of arachnophobia. It was a little unsettling.

"Y'know, you're pretty scary when you're running at me like that." Grace said through gritted teeth, trying to catch the Eridian off guard and throw him off. Rocky just balanced his weight, unbothered, much to the humans dismay.

"Scary, question?" Rocky asked, voice incredulous. Grace nodded.

"Yeah, like some kind of big spider monster."

Rocky quirked his carapace. "New word?"

Grace laughed, the sound further pressed out of him under the weight and the rush of endorphins. "Predator animal that's not real, made up as a scary story."

"Oh!" Rocky said, perking up. "Eridian word is 🎶🎵!" He rocked back and forth in his ball, making Grace wheeze. He still tried to squirm, but it was clear he wouldn't be able to get away.

"Eridians have many of those stories!"

Grace looked up with wide eyes, suddenly curious. "Really? You'll have to tell me some sometime." He grinned, excited by the idea of sharing campfire tales with someone brought up in a completely different culture. He'd have to jot some down for the scientists back home.

"Rocky tell Grace one right now!" Rocky said, backing up a little so the ball sat over his stomach. It wasn't the most comfortable, but he could breathe a little better, so Grace took it.

Grace propped himself up on his elbows to look at Rocky, curious. "Right now? I thought we were wrestling."

"Story is relevant, statement." Rocky said, tapping a leg as punctuation. Grace shrugged.

"Long time ago," Rocky started, his voice carrying a dramatic tone over the sound of the translator. "There was 🎶🎵🎶🎶. She was a large 🎶🎵, like Eridian, but big, big, big."

As he spoke, he gestured animatedly, making many different signs and movements with his arms as if acting out the scene. Grace was captivated, imagining a massive Eridian with powerful legs that shook the ground with each step.

"🎶🎵🎶🎶 was a kind being. Big, but gentle and calm. Old Eridian story say she watch over lonely Eridians when they sleep and keep dumb Eridians out of trouble."

In Grace's mind, he pictured the lumbering beast of a creature standing guardian over an Eridian dwelling, a loyal sentinel in the eternal night of Erid's dense skies. Grace smiled as he listened, allowing his overtired imagination to wander.

"She was known for another thing too. A punishment all Eridians fear." Rocky paused dramatically, his hands freezing in the air as if waiting. Grace raised an eyebrow.

"Punishment? I thought you said she was nice."

Rocky nodded, waggling his carapace. "She is."

Grace made a confused face, his nose scrunching up. "Then what..?"

"She was also known as 🎵🎵🎶🎵🎶🎶." Rocky said, looking down in a way that made it seem like that was supposed to strike a chord.

"Uh... I don't know what that meANS-" Grace shouted as Rocky dropped his arms, pressing his hands through the xenonite mesh to skitter briefly over Grace's stomach. He pulled away, watching as realization bled across his human friends features.

In the early biology explainations, there was a shocking number of shared traits between humans and Eridians. Nerve endings were one that had confused Grace, originally thinking that Rocky's sense of touch would be dulled by his carapace. In reality, that was the furthest from the truth. Rocky had reported that Eridians were actually extremely touch sensitive.

Which meant Eridians could be ticklish. A theory that was confirmed as Grace felt a familiar, overwhelming swirl of anxiety in his gut.

Eridian legends had a tickle monster.

And he had just fallen for it. Hook, line, and sinker.

"Oh... Oh god no..."

A nervous smile began to push it's way across his face, sleep deprivation preventing him from suppressing it. Rocky clicked his hands together, chirping in amusement.

"Actually bud, I think I'm tired out. The wrestling and the story did it for me!" Grace said, arms shaking with the instinct to protect himself. Rocky shook his carapace.

"No, Rocky not done helping. Must make sure you sleep."

Grace tried to scoot backwards, unable to slide himself from under Rocky's weight. Rocky chittered.

"Rocky will be careful to not hurt stupid squishy skin." He reassured, adjusting before digging in.

Ryland Grace, humanities last hope, squealed.

Despite the xenonite and the rock hard fingers, Rocky was surprisingly gentle. Grace knew this, logically, after watching him with his xenonite building device, but who'd have known?

Grace threw his head back, his arms shooting to push against the hamster ball as he let out a stream of high pitched giggling. Rocky only had two hands working him over, pinching and scribbling across his belly and lower ribs, but it was so bad. Grace couldn't tell if it was the months without physical contact or if he was just unbearably sensitive.

"Rocky-! Knock it off!" He begged through his laughter, yelping as the tormenting fingers vibrated into his sides. Behind Rocky, he kicked his legs, banging his heels against the floor. Rocky was unfazed.

The Eridian rolled forwards to reach a little higher on Grace's torso, poking at his ribs. With each prod, the human jumped, trying desperately to grab Rocky's hands. This got a laugh out of the alien.

"How human so squishy, but have hard stuff in some places, question? Why not hard on the outside? Human body make no sense." Rocky teased as he poked, making frustrated laughter burst from his friend.

"I've told you about bones before!"

"Yes, but still make no sense." A third arm joined in, all three moving in rapid succession to make Grace collapse into hysterics. "Humans laugh funny."

What the human wanted to say was "Yeah? Well, yours is funnier!".

What actually came out was a garbled, alphabet soup of a sentence, not even registering with the translator. Rocky looked far too amused.

Suddenly, he stopped. Grace wiped tears from his eyes as he looked to his friend quizzically.

"T-that was mean." He said, residual laughter bubbling up.

"Rocky have idea." Rocky said, quickly moving off of his torso. Grace rolled over, planning to stand up, but he felt a weight roll over his lower legs.

Then, the weight started pulling at his shoes.

"Rocky! Rocky, don't you dare!" He turned as much as he could, putting on his angry-teacher voice. Rocky wiggled one shoe off, pushing it to the side.

"Rocky hasn't seen weird human feet. Want to see for science, statement." He pulled at the other shoe, the third arm pulling off the sock of the previous foot. Grace tried to kick out, but he wasn't able to do much more than bend his knees, making his upper body slide back towards Rocky.

"No you don't! You're just messing with me!" He tried to army-crawl away with his arms. They just slid against the floor uselessly.

"No~ sarcasm. Rocky is always genuine, sarcasm."

If he weren't already laughing in anticipation, he probably would have snorted.

"You suck!" Grace said, giving up and bracing himself. He tucked his arms under his chest, pressing his face into his hands.

"Grace suck more."

With that, stoney fingers swiped over his soles.

Grace cackled.

He writhed, struggling renewed as he clawed at the floor, pulling at his legs with all of his strength. Shrill screams laced the mirth, echoing off of the walls and through the ship. He curled in on himself, reaching back and swiping at the xenonite ball. He stretched out, reaching to grab something, anything, to pull himself out of Rocky's grip. The feeling sent electricity up his legs and straight to his spine, making him flop around like a fish.

"Grace is loud! So loud! Hurts Rocky ears!" Grace could make out over his hysteria. He shook his head, gasping as he tried to throw a retort back. He couldn't form the words.

Rocky was agonizingly thorough. He scratched at the soft inside of his sole, dragging the sharper edge of his fingers over the arches, scribbling lightly over the ball, then worming under and between his toes in a repetitive circular pattern. Every touch was exploratory, but precise as if he had some idea of what might work. He made sure no skin was left untouched, only slowing once Grace's laughter began to come in wheezes.

He didn't stop completely, switching to slow dragging up and down each foot. He listened intently as Grace damn near melted under the touch. Gasping breaths made way for breathy giggles, the human relaxing against the floor as his friend watched him, unaware of the attention.

To Rocky's sight, Grace looked more calm than he'd ever been.

Sure, his heart still beat rapidly, but his breathing was leisurely. It didn't carry the same stress it did before. His heartbeat sent soundwaves through his form, revealing unclenched shoulders, heavy limbs, and a dreamy grin. While Eridians didn't laugh the same way humans did, the effect was the same.

Rocky withdrew, backing off of his ankles and rolling to sit beside Grace's head. He watched as the laughter slowed, but the smile remained. The human looked up at him through tousled hair, not moving to stand.

"You're mean." He said, pointing at Rocky with a wavering hand. Rocky hummed.

"But, Grace is tired now, question? Can sleep?"

Grace thought for a moment, feeling the weight in his limbs and eyelids, how his breath was deep and slow. He felt how his mind was a little lighter, buzzing with happy chemicals.

Sighing, he nodded.

Rocky made a victorious sound, throwing his hands in the air.

"Grace go to bed now, get off floor." Rocky said, moving to get out of Grace's way. Grace didn't move, lying still. Rocky could hear his breathing deepen further, his eyes closing.

"No. Grace not sleep here, statement. Go to bed." He rolled closer, nudging the human on his shoulder. Rocky startled as Grace scooted towards him, wrapping around the ball and pressing his forehead into the xenonite mesh.

Rocky stared in confusion as Grace drifted off, spooning around the outside of the hamster ball. He couldn't imagine that was very comfortable for a being without carapace, but there he was. Pressed against the hard floor and the hard shell.

Oh well. At least he would sleep tonight.

Rocky settled in, lowering to lay in his ball next to Grace. He pressed a hand through the mesh to bury in the humans hair, trilling as he sighed in his sleep.

As he watched his friend sleep, feeling Grace deserved a reward after the torment, he began to sing softly.

The notes resonated through the xenonite like crystal bells, ringing in pure tones. It was an old melody from his younger years, something his parents used to sing while he was getting ready to sleep.

He had sung it to Adrian the night before he left, one last song to soothe her before saying goodbye.

He sang it to his crew the day they didn't wake up, a prayer that they knew someone still cared for them. An apology for failing them, it being the only comfort he thought he could give.

He sang it tonight as a promise. To himself, to his human companion, and to Earth and Erid.

They would live. They all would live.

[geethingy]

monster vs alien (who is who?)

fandom: project hail mary

summary: first part of potentially a series 👀 in which rocky and grace argue over which of them is more of an evil deadly monster. they're both space orks.

note: i need all the fics about the differences in their evolution stat. i love the hunting trope (ambush vs persistence) so much, i think it's such a fun idea.

I'm really confused.

The Hail Mary is not a big ship. It took me less than 20 minutes to explore every room after I first woke up - and that's with having forgotten to walk after not moving a muscle in over four years. Just 20 minutes.

I've been looking for Rocky for over two hours now.

"Rocky?" I call out into the dormitory that I've already checked three times.

I frown with my hands on my hips.

We both have our days when we really need our own space. For the most part, we'll usually respect it and leave the other be as well as we can, but in living quarters this small and with a roommate who can hear through walls, me-time is always more of a we-time. Surprisingly, it hasn't been too bad. We both know what the alternative is like, and I think that's given us enough perspective to not just be tolerant of each other's constant presence, but straight up clingy for it. Even this late in the game. So I'm beginning to feel small-to-medium amounts of disturbed. I might not be able to see through walls, but I've never had trouble finding him before-

"What the-!"

I snap my head around, eyes bouncing from spot to spot. I feel the hairs of my neck stand and the flesh of my arm pimple with goosebumps.

There's nothing there. Nobody there. No Rocky there. Rocky is the only person who could be on the ship. Heh.

"Okay, buddy. If you're trying to mess with me because of what I said, I'm sorry! It's not gonna work!" I call out, trying my best to keep my voice from betraying the unease I feel in my gut. I feel like I'm being watched.

Before his sudden disappearance, Rocky and I had a bit of a discussion over who, in our scenario, would be the horrific monster alien that poses an extinction threat to the other's species, and who would be the chum. We've tallied up the points so far and learned the terrifying histories of each other's evolution and special adaptations. It got more and more heated as we tied in counter with each other over and over. I'd win the balancing on one foot contest, he'd win the 'has five legs and has no need for stupid balance' contest. So on and so forth.

After a few hours of this, my blood was up. I (cockily) suggested performing a live demonstration of a perfect monster for him when we touch down on Erid. I may have said something about getting the entire Eridian race under my squishy and opposable thumb. Starting with Rocky's mother.

So now Rocky's missing. For the first hour, I worried I took it a step too far. Maybe your mom jokes are a line you just don't cross in Eridian culture, and I offended him so badly he took his new EVA suit out through the airlock because of how much space he needed from me. But now, I'm pretty sure he's messing with me. Because I've felt him watching me for a while. I just don't know where from.

It's really quiet on the ship. I've never known Rocky to be light-footed, and it's starting to get unbearable not being able to hear him. I'm about to ask Mary to start singing for me when-

All of the lights suddenly turn off, with Mary's voice piercing through the silent darkness. "Automatic lighting disabled."

Mm no. I hate this. "Uh, no no no. Lights back on, please?"

"Automatic lighting disabled. Manual override required." Her voice is so much louder in the dark.

"Manual-" I huff. "How am I supposed to manually override if I can't see anything?"

"The manual override is located in control-"

"Yes, Mary, I know." My voice wobbles in steadily growing terror. I slowly feel my way across the dormitory before I stop suddenly in the doorway - the long, black corridor in front of me.

Rocky is in the control room. That's how he did all this fudgery with the lights. My heart picks up speed, and my nerves assure me that something (Rocky! Rocky is the only other person on this ship!) will attack if I go up there. Gulp.

I back up a bit from the doorway, turning over my options in my head - which is working in significant overtime. I feel sweaty looking down the corridor, but I refuse to take my eyes off it.

Rocky is currently in the control room, but he switched the lights off like this on purpose. He knows how useless I am in the dark. And he can see through walls, so he knows exactly where I am right now and there would be no purpose in hiding. He's probably on his way to me right now, and I'm defenseless. Unless he's already at the end of the corridor just staring at me.

I squint down the corridor. Do I see his figure at the end of it? Well, whatever I'm seeing, it looks nothing like him. Too big, too wrong.

My thoughts are starting to drift into stupid territory and my mind is playing tricks on me. I try to shake it off, wiping my sweaty palms on my pants and taking deep breaths. I know he's trying to scare me, so it's stupid that it's actually working. Rocky is my best friend. He's not a monster. He'd never really hurt me-

I hear the rapid sound of footsteps charging towards me from the end of the corridor. I scream, scrambling backwards as fast as I can. It's not fast enough. A shrieking invisible thing tackles me and I brace for-

A pillow softens the blow to my head from the ground. Once all my scream putters out, I wheeze from where Rocky is squeezing me tightly.

"Wh-whhhyy.." I gasp pathetically.

"Grace get too cocky. Needed to teach a lesson," Rocky's cheery, friendly voice chirps. It does good for soothing the terror bells still ringing through my head and body. So does the squeezing. "You were sooo scared. Did not know heart can get that fast!" he sings in joy.

"Ugh, whatever! I wasn't that scared," I grunt, trying to wriggle my arms free from the death hug. I can't help the small smile that forms in my relief. "I was more afraid that you were actually mad at me."

He titters at me. "You're lying. You're scared even now. Your body-nerve-system still think I will eat you," he shimmies his carapace onto my stomach, and I grunt and tense at the nuzzling. "Maybe will. Show who is the better monster."

"Ew!" I start to laugh stupidly - the energy built up from all the terror needing to be released somehow. "No, please! At least kill me first. Or start your process over there. Away from me."

My body-nerve-system has taken over and is wiggling uncontrollably, trying to avoid his consistent nuzzling. "Pf- stop it!" I snort.

"Why, question? Thought Grace not scared." He wiggles more emphatically.

"Ah- I'm not!" My knees knock against Rocky's back as my body tries and fails to curl in, my stomach feeling more sensitive the more he moves. "I'm worried your biology is going to take over and unload on accident, thinking it's dinner time. Okay- Rhhoc- hehehe- quuuit it!" I whine, embarrassed about not being able to hold back my giggling. He's doing this on purpose.

He trills a noise of offense. "You are disgusting. That could never happen. Eridians too dignified. Ripping apart prey must always come first." He moves my arms away from my body just enough to tickle my sides and, despite expecting it, I explode.

"AGH- No! hAhahaha!!" I can never really talk when he does this. What I'm trying to say is, no! hey! get off! but unfortunately all I can manage to get out is convulsive giggling. My arms snap in over and over to protect my sides, but they're blocked by his rock hands. I only succeed in bruising myself a little.

"Don't laugh," he says while laughing himself. "encourages hungry-feeling!"

Ugh. I never win this challenge. I hold my breath, clench everything, and put every ounce of willpower I have to try and contain my giggles. Surprisingly - still squirming and with my eyes squeezed shut - I almost manage it! Until Rocky moves further up into my ribs. I whimper and fall back into hysterics.

I try to flop around to deter his hands (too many hands!!! too many hands!!) but my torso can't move at all under his FAT body. My legs are free to kick in and out as much as they want at least, but it doesn't do anything to stop him either. I can't stop it.

I continue to strain, but my head falls back in resignation as I laugh. I regret it immediately. The position turns a desperate intake of breath into the loudest snort ever. Rocky stops then, but I hardly feel relief from it - he only stopped because he's laughing at me so hard that now he can barely breathe.

"G-gett offff..." I gasp through giggles. His laughter is making him shake over my stomach again, and I'm so hypersensitive that I can't stand it. I squirm to no avail.

"♫♪what♫noise♪♫♪~~!!" He dissolves back into his amusement without finishing his sentence. I burst out into full belly laughter again despite the heat in my cheeks. His giggles are so contagious. And his vibrations are still tickling me down to the bones. I think I might die. Atleast I'm taking Rocky down with me.

Mercifully, Rocky climbs off me after a minute. His legs are weakening from laughter and he doesn't want to crush me for real. I curl up the second I'm able to in a way-too-late reaction to preserve my vital organs from tickle torture.

"I see now," he giggles. "Sensitivity is good defense. You become so funny, nothing can eat you. Predators too busy laughing."

"Please be quiet," I groan. I take a steadying breath. "Alright, I admit it. You're scarier out of the two of us. You ticked all the boxes that scare humans the most. Silence, darkness, surprise attacks. You'd definitely be able to take over humanity before I can take over Erid. Your mom would destroy me."

"No," he sighs through his vents, and I frown in confusion. Rocky's not one to reject a win. "Grace scary too. Stealth is part of Eridian nature. Know how to stay silent. Not detectable," he shudders. "You detect anyway. Almost catch me many times with crazy light detectors. Scary."

I smile incredulously. Fascinating! "So, all that just for us to tie again?"

"Grace winning for now, actually. We move ticklish from weakness to strength," I gape at him, but he cuts me off. "Serious about good defense. Funny, funny, funny."

"What- that's not- it's.." I stutter helplessly. "You're ticklish too! You know what, I'm hunting you next time."

"Grace not stealthy. Cannot ever surprise Rocky."

"Humans don't hunt our prey like that anyway. We just keep following them until they get too tired to keep running," I lean in as Rocky shies away. "We get them in their sleep, you know. When they're the most vulnerable. You might hear me coming, but you won't be able to stop me."

"♫♪!" he shakes his carapace like he's snapping himself out of it, then rushes me to start poking my sides and stomach.

"He-hey!!!" I giggle and push at him.

"Grace not trick me," he trills, but I swear I detect notes of relief when he hears me laugh again. "Can not scare me. Grace is best friend. You are not monster."

[amazingmsme]

I Suppose You Think This Is Funny?

AN: I’m baaack! Sorry I haven’t been posting as much as I used to, but I’ve still been dealing with a lot personally. But the project hail mary/iron lung hype finally got me back in the game lmao. I couldn’t let y’all have all the fun!

This is the winner from that one poll awhile back, so hope you enjoy! I’m hoping to get back into writing & posting more frequently, but that all depends on how kind life is to me. Kinda not wild about the ending, so be nice

From the moment Simon gained consciousness on the Hail Mary, he was cursing. "Fuck" was practically his favorite word, but only the other human aboard the ship could understand the expletives grumbled under his breath. Not that Simon was aware. That damn rock understood just about everything else; why would swearing be such a foreign concept?

Rocky was deeply familiar with Eridian swears and insults, but Grace hadn't been too keen on adding their translations.

"The last thing I need is for you to cuss me out. You already call me stupid on a daily basis," he teased with a chuckle, but Rocky didn't find it as funny.

"Rocky need space, statement," he said, turning around in his ball and walking away.

"C'mon Rock, don't be like that," Grace called out after him.

Rocky paused, rolling closer to his friend as he answered. "Rocky check on Simon. Will be back later."

"Oh, okay," Grace accepted the answer easily enough. He opened his mouth as if to add something, but stopped himself short. "Ah, nevermind," he waved a hand, as if in dismissal.

The movement caught Rocky's attention. "Nevermind what, question?"

Grace shook his head. "It's stupid."

"Okay!" Rocky chirped in agreement, about to head on his way, when Grace's voice stopped him once more.

"Just- make sure he knows he's allowed to go wherever he wants. He only really hangs out in the green room and observation deck, and I just want him to feel comfortable here."

"Rocky tell him!" he agreed before rolling down the hall.

~~~

Simon could hear Rocky coming a mile away. The loud thunking wasn't exactly stealthy.

"Simon!" he exclaimed, announcing his presence. Said man looked over, arching a brow quizzically.

"Rocky..." he answered, unsure what the alien wanted. They rarely interacted one on one, mostly due to Simon's own hesitance.

"Rocky need favor, statement," he said, cutting to the chase. Simon tried not to appear as tense as he felt.

"... Well, that depends. What's the favor?"

Rocky rolled his ball further into the room, moving closer to Simon, but still keeping a small distance between them.

"Need new words," Rocky admitted, carapace lowered in something akin to disappointment or frustration.

Simon snorted. "Do I look like a fuckin' dictionary? Go ask Grace," he dismissed, but Rocky wasn't having it.

"No!" he stomped to assert his point. "Grace not share human bad words! Those are words Rocky need!"

Simon was hiding a smile behind his hand, holding back amused laughter. "Is that so?"

Rocky went still, his voice monotonous. "Simon laugh at Rocky."

Great, now he felt bad.

"No I'm not!" Simon denied, but Rocky continued to stare. "I was… laughing at Grace," he insisted. Rocky took a few steps closer.

"Why, question?"

"Because he's a such a nerdy goody two shoes," he said, a playful smirk tugging at his lips. "I mean, who gatekeeps curse words from an alien?"

"Hm. Don't understand," Rocky said, hoping for clarification.

"What, gatekeep? It's slang for withholding information," he explained.

Rocky hopped up and down, stomping his feet with excitement. "Yes! Grace gatekeep!"

"Well that's just not fair," Simon agreed, allowing his infectious energy to rub off on him. He walked over to grab the nearby laptop and translator, placing it in his lap as he sat back down. "So, how 'bout we start with the worst ones and work our way down from there."

~~~

"With insults, they're more or less interchangeable, but it depends on the situation."

"Hm. Need example."

Simon shifted, leaning his left side against Rocky's ball for support. "Okay... so say we're both walking down the street and I bump into you without saying excuse me. I'm being an asshole. But if I see you walking and go out of my way to run into you, then I'm being a dick."

"Dick worse than asshole, question?"

The phrasing was so unexpected, Simon couldn't help but burst into laughter, nodding, "Yeah, you got it bud! But really, it's a matter of what feels right in the moment."

"Rocky need more examples." He didn't really, but this was the most he'd heard the new human speak, and as it turns out, he was rather funny.

"Ohokay, okay, here's one. So if you tell me to do something and I refuse for a stupid reason, I'm being a whiny little bitch. Got that?"

"Whiny little bitch," Rocky repeated, beaming with pride at his expanded vocabulary.

"You think you got it, or you want me to keep going?"

"Rocky understands now."

"Glad I could help," Simon said, patting the glass of his ball as Rocky rolled by.

Before he left, Rocky paused in the doorway. "Simon, question?"

"Yeah?" he cocked his head, glancing over at him.

"Why Simon not leave room, question?"

Simon sighed. He figured it wouldn't be long until one of them asked that question. He rarely left the onboard greenhouse ever since he'd first laid eyes on it.

"I just really like this room," he shrugged.

"Bullshit, statement."

Simon's lips quirked into a tight smile. "Already putting those words to good use I see," he said, hoping to deflect. When Rocky didn't respond, he continued, "Where I came from, we only had one tree left. And when it finally died, that was it. So seeing so many plants- alive and in space, thriving... I don't know. It just feels comforting, I guess."

Rocky thought for a moment before speaking. "Is same reason Simon leak when see stars, question?"

Simon's breath hitched in his throat. He wasn't expecting the conversation to take such a turn after their crash course in Swearing 101. He nodded, voice barely above a whisper, "Yeah..."

He flinched when he felt something touch his leg, looking up to see Rocky reaching through the mesh panel to rest a comforting claw on his knee.

"Grace, Rocky save stars! Save plants!" he explained.

"Yeah, you did..." Simon trailed off, a sad smile on his face as he fought back tears.

He stood abruptly, startling Rocky as he stretched and groaned loudly. "Now if you don't mind, I think I'm gonna go look at those stars," he said, walking off towards one of the large windows.

"Okay. Rocky go share new words with Grace!"

"Go easy on him, tiger," Simon teased from over his shoulder, unsure if Rocky even knew what a tiger was.

Rocky gave a small nod and went in the opposite direction, shouting down the hall as he went, "What the fuck Grace doing, question?"

From further down the hall, another, more confused voice, "What?"

~~~

It hadn't even been an hour before Rocky came back, barreling towards Simon with Grace not far behind.

"Bad, bad bad. Rocky piss off Grace," he said, rolling around Simon to hide behind him.

"Well that was fast," Simon mused, almost impressed. He quickly schooled his features when he noticed Grace standing before him, hands on his hips. His jaw was clenched, foot tapping in annoyance as he awaited an explanation.

"Oh, hey Grace. Sooo... to what do I owe the pleas-"

"You taught him how to swear?" It sounded less like a question, and more of an accusation. Simon didn't see any reason in denying it.

"He asked," he said with a shrug, turning to look out the window to hide his growing smirk.

"Of course he did! But that doesn't mean you give him a whole arsenal!"

"He asked nicely?" Simon tried again, turning back around only to be met with an icy glare. Simon stared down at their companion, brows furrowed, "Jesus, what all did you say?"

Grace didn't give Rocky a chance to answer, "Oh he said plenty."

"Oh yeah? Like what?" he asked, biting back a chuckle.

"Like, "what the fuck are you doing Grace!" "No dumbass!" "Stop being such a whiny little bitch!" "Why Grace so fucking stupid!"" he listed them off one by one, growing more exasperated as both of their amusement became apparent. Simon's shoulders shook with suppressed laughter, having to lean against the wall for support as Rocky let out a few giggly trills.

"Oh, I suppose you two think this is funny," he said, cocking his hip as he shifted his weight.

"Yes!" Rocky cheared before Simon shushed him, reigning in his own reactions. He cleared his throat, donning a serious expression.

"No, you're right. It's not funny," he admitted, waiting until Grace's tense posture slackened from the apology. "It's fuckin' hilarious."

He didn't bother holding back anymore, bursting into loud hysterics.

It was the first time he'd heard Simon really laugh, and it was an infectious, carefree sound. He just didn't like the fact that he was the butt of the joke.

Having no other options to turn to in order to make them shut up, Grace resorted to what he knew best.

"Okay, I'm gonna need you to catch a bubble," he said in his stern "teacher voice."

"What?" Simon wheezed, looking between Grace and Rocky, doubling over. "What does that even mean?"

Grace could feel the heat rising to his cheeks as they continued to mock him, but despite his growing embarrassment, he found it increasingly difficult not to smile.

"Means Simon shut the fuck up, statement," Rocky explained.

"Well that's not very nice," Simon mused, a smug grin tugging at his lips.

"That's why I said catch a freaking bubble!" He had to take a deep breath to calm himself back down. He loved Rocky, and Simon was really growing on him, but gosh darn it did they get on his nerves sometimes.

"Careful there, you almost said a bad word," Simon snickered, fist bumping Rocky through the mesh material of his ball.

"Alright, that's it!" Grace clapped loudly to grab their attention. "Apologize. Both of you," he demanded, pointing sternly at the perpetrators.

"Wha- me?" Simon sputtered, caught off guard by the unexpected request.

"Yes you!" Grace insisted, not backing down from his stance. Simon looked him up and down, relaxing with a smirk.

"Why? What're you gonna do about it?" he taunted, relishing in the way his mouth hung open in shock. "Probably nothing."

"Oh I'm gonna do... something," he threatened weakly.

"Yeah, I'm really shaking in my boots," he drawled, sitting back down on the windowsill.

Grace huffed indignantly. "You're a piece of work, you know that?"

"So I've been told."

Grace rubbed his face from under his glasses, knocking them askew. He hated that Simon was right; he probably would do nothing. It's not like there was much he could do in way of punishment- wait.

A sly smile graced his features, standing up straighter with newfound confidence.

Rocky noticed the shift in demeanor, knowing it could only spell trouble.

"Y'know what? Fine, whatever. Water under the bridge," Grace said, slowly walking closer to his target. Simon only gave a noncommittal hum in response. "Mind if I sit here?" he asked, not waiting for an answer before sitting a bit too close to Simon.

"Simon should run now, statement," Rocky tried to warn, only to be brushed off.

"Nah, don't listen to him. We're good!" As if to prove his point, Grace slung an arm around his shoulders, pulling him even closer.

Simon arched a brow quizzically, leaning back to study the other man's face. Grace caught his eye, flashing an innocent smile.

"Run! Simon! Simon, run!" Rocky tapped against his ball, and maybe he should actually listen to him.

"Uh, yeah, I'm just gonna-" Simon made to stand, only for Grace to pull him back down.

"Hey, where're you goin'? Just relaaaax," he reassured, giving his shoulders a friendly shake.

"Um, okay..." Simon trailed off, trying to scoot away to put some distance between them, but Grace's grip was surprisingly strong. "Are you sure you're not still mad? 'Cause-"

"What? Nooo, no no. If I was mad, would I do this?" he asked, squeezing up and down his side.

Simon flinched beneath the touch, barking out a surprised laugh before slapping his hand over his mouth.

"Why so shy all of a sudden? I thought you wanted to laugh! Or did you only want to do it at my expense?" he teased.

"Noho, that's not- shihihit don't do thahahat!" Simon snorted as he pinched down his side, squeezing his hip.

"Do what?" Grace asked innocently, continuing to knead around his hip. "Oh, this? Or do you mean this?" As he spoke, his hand jumped up to scratch in his armpit, careful not to get too close to the remaining stump. It had fully healed over months ago, but Grace still wanted to be careful.

"GAHAHAH!" Simon let out a giggly scream, jerking away from the touch and further into Grace's embrace. "You bahahastard!"

"Well now, that's uncalled for," Grace said, tweaking his ribs in retaliation. Simon sputtered through his laughter, trying to twist and reach with his right hand to fight him off.

"Ihihit's justified!" he argued, legs kicking and scrambling against the floor for leverage. Grace adjusted his grip, trapping him in a hug from behind and pulling him into his lap.

"Agree to disagree," he said, raking over his ribs with clawed hands. Simon snorted again, louder this time, and immediately tugged his shirt up to hide his growing blush.

Unfortunately, this made his shirt hike up to expose his lower stomach. Well, unfortunate for Simon. For Grace, it was just the opportunity he was looking for.

"AUGH! MOHOHOTHERFUHUHUCKER!" he cackled as a hand slipped beneath his shirt, kneading and scratching at bare skin.

"I wouldn't dream of touching your mother like that!" Grace gasped, giggling at his own joke as Simon growled through his laughter. His face turned a shade darker, but Grace couldn't tell if it was out of embarrassment, or frustration.

"Wihihill you just shut uhuhup?"

Or both.

"No, I don't think I will," he taunted, a smile evident in his tone.

"Nohohow I know why you're a teacher," he began, and Grace paused his movements to let him catch his breath and speak, curious where he was going.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, because you're a smart AHAHAHASS!" His words were cut off by deep, frantic laughter as Grace dug into both pits.

Simon leaned on him for support, conflicted between pressing his arm down, and reaching around to protect his left side. Grace smirked, vibrating a clawed hand into his stomach while the other played his ribs like a piano. Specifically, the left side of his ribs.

Simon threw his head back, mouth open wide as the sound of his mirth echoed throughout the small ship. He twisted back and forth in Grace's arms, unable to dislodge the probing hands as they wandered his torso.

"Grace only tickling Simon's left side," Rocky noted, startling them both at the reminder of his presence.

"Yeah, and?" Grace prompted, continuing to knead and pinch around his ribs.

"Simon only have one arm! Cannot properly defend himself, statement."

How was it that the living rock was the only one looking out for him?

"Yeah, and?" Grace repeated, smug sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"Is mean!" Rocky exclaimed, stomping his foot for emphasis.

Grace barked out a laugh of his own, glasses falling askew as he cocked his head towards him.

"Nah, I'm being super nice, right Si?" he asked, rubbing his knuckles up and down his ribcage to prompt an answer. His fingers brushed against the edge of his gills, and Simon snorted loudly, desperately trying to shove him away.

"NOHOHO! Thihis ihihis cruel ahand unusual punishmehehent!" he cried out defiantly.

"I think I prefer the term funishment!" Grace quipped, tracing along the gill slits ever so gently.

"Ohoho brohohother," he groaned, trying his best to sound annoyed, despite the fact that this was the most he's laughed in years, maybe ever. Deep chuckles gave way to pitchy giggles and breathless snorts as Grace continued tracing his gills. Simon abandoned the idea of fighting him off and chose instead to bury his face in his hand, too embarrassed for Grace or Rocky to look at him directly.

C'mohohon, nohohot there!" he all but begged.

"Okay, then where?" Grace asked smugly, catching a glimpse of the blush rapidly spreading across Simon's face from behind his hand.

"Nohohowhere!"

"Sorry, but that answer's invalid."

"YOU'RE invahahalid!" he argued.

Grace can't help but chuckle, rolling his eyes as Rocky chirped in amusement. "Real mature, guys." Still, he supposed that justice had been served by now, finally deciding to grant him mercy...

Right after this.

"So, how do you feel about raspberries?" he asked casually, slowing his hands to a stop, but still trapping him in a hug.

"What, like the fruit?" Simon asked, confused and panting for breath. "Dunno, never had them. Why?"

"Then I'm gonna go out on a limb and say you've never had this kind either." He didn't give him a chance to ask any follow up questions, burying his face in the crook of Simon's neck, blowing a raspberry over the set of gills there.

The scream Simon let out was loud enough it made Rocky jump, backing away a few steps.

"Simon very loud, statement."

Maybe he was delusional from all the tickling, but Simon swore the bastard was teasing him. 

"GRACE, WHAHAT THEHEHE FUCK?"

"Language!" Grace gasped, feigning shock. He pulled Simon's hair off to the side, allowing easy access to the other side of his neck. "Just for that..." he trailed off, letting the audibly large breath he took speak for itself.

"No wait- dohohon't!" anticapatory giggles fall past his lips as he tries one last time to make a break for it.

If Grace didn't know any better, he'd say he wasn't trying very hard to escape. Interesting.

His lips connected with the other side of his neck, blowing against his gills. Another shrill screech fills the air, dissolving into frantic, bubbly giggles as he tries to scrunch his neck.

"Thihihis ihihisn't FAHAHAIR!" Simon whines, finally managing to shove his face away and knocking his glasses off in the process.

Rocky scrambles to catch them, holding them out for Grace to take as his own amused chuckles die off.

"Thanks bud," he reaches for them, only for Rocky to yank them back at the last second. Grace rolls his eyes and tries again, only to fall for the same trick.

"Serves you right," Simon mutters as he catches his breath, a bright smile still lingering.

Grace still had a proud smirk plastered across his face, shrugging sheepishly. "You okay? I didn't go overboard, did I?" he asked, wanting to make sure he didn't push him too far. Simon huffed out a laugh, waving him off.

"Nah, I've dealt with worse. But you are horrible."

Grace snorted out a laugh, "Oh yeah?"

"Yes! I mean, you attacked a poor, defenseless amputee for no reason!" he said, sarcastic amusement evident in his voice. 

"Well if you ask me, the amputee had it coming," he taunted. "Besides, you're hardly what I'd call defenseless." 

"Whatever. That shit was excessive and you know it."

"You could've asked me to stop at any time," he noted smugly.

"I did!" Simon argued. Didn't he? Surely.

"Mmm, Simon say many things. Did not say stop," Rocky spoke up, earning a playful glare.

"Oh yeah? What do you know."

"Rocky know Simon very ticklish!" He was definitely teasing him now.

Simon let out an embarrassed groan, hiding behind his hand. "I'm never gonna live this down."

Rocky reached through the mesh on his ball to pat his leg comfortingly. "Is okay. Grace still most ticklish human."

"Okay, that's it!" Grace growled playfully. Rocky let out a string of giddy, nervous chirps before rolling down the hall.

Grace jumped up to give chase, but paused in the doorway, looking back at Simon. "So uh, we cool?"

He shook his head fondly, a soft smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "Yeah, we're cool."

Grace smiled in relief, turning to chase after Rocky, but Simon's voice calling out stopped him in his tracks. "But that doesn't mean you're off the hook."

Grace gave a dramatic sigh, "Yeah, I figured."

[blitzzeri]

giggly and squeaky grace oughhhhh why so squeaky he’s literally rocky’s squeaky toy

[mellowstardust]

Stop why are they making so many 😭

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