Ashley Graves

superiority complex? i find it quite simple TME ꑭ ✡ 4t0 https://rentry.co/transsexual

[ashley-is-missing]

to everyone here for the discourse: im ashley graves, a ukrainian gay male, transmed, exclus, pro psych and recovery, liberal centrist(slight left or right lean sometimes), zionist jew, anti ukrainian separatism(я з донбасу). i have diagnosed transsexuality. also a couple of PDs(ASNPDemon), point is i have pretty much zero empathy. oh and also im fatphobic and an anti islamist. as everyone should be.

im highly educated and i read about subjects i talk about, so if you arent of similar intelligence to me, i probably wont engage. im tired of just repeating the same common sense stuff, so unless you have something new to contribute, dont bother

blog rentry

to my darling: if you do somehow find this account, dont read it. i dont mean what i say here, i say it during tilting, crashes and splits, but i wont clean it up on purpose so stuff like this, my feelings, are archived. what i write here is worst of the worst feelings and i DO NOT mean it in the end. please block this account and do not engage.

when i say he in bolded text its referring to a person that groomed me

[ashley-is-missing]

when you grow up you will be less radical trust me

[ashley-is-missing]

am i TMA if i get mistaken for a hon

[proship-shuujuu]

using "tme/tma" is transphobia.

calling people "theyfab" is transphobia.

calling people "transtrenders" is transphobia.

calling people "transandrobros/transandrocunts" is transphobia.

transmedicalism is transphobia.

transandrophobia is transphobia.

transmisogyny is transphobia.

exorsexism is transphobia.

radical feminism is transphobia.

invalidating xenogenders is transphobia.

invalidating neopronouns is transphobia.

[ashley-is-missing]

tme and tma isnt really transphobic. its more so, well, retarded. especially how misused it is

stupid females -> stupid AFABs -> stupid TMEs

the rest of the points is, well v

[ashley-is-missing]

i need to swallow him whole i need to bend him over i need to grab his hair i need to shake him like a maracas deally feally hars until his braincels make a noise around like rkrkrkktkkrkrk

[kingsillysmilez]

Happy Pride Month !!

[neurologicallyfaultytransmedtry2]

How do I @ the entire transmedicalist community

[ashley-is-missing]

image id: a drawing of two bisexual furry women. end id

[ashley-is-missing]

people act like im so privileged for transitioning, no, my family is rather poor(entire life and careers of my parents uprooted twice due to war, troubles with hiring because we are eastern ukrainian), its just that im in a country where transsexuality is still medicalized, and so treatment for my condition is free. you see the difference? when transsexuality isnt medicalized and transitioning is expensive, people assume im rich. im not, its just that medicalization of a condition helps people with those conditions. if i was rich id skip the waiting lists and be post-op already, alas, i have to wait. once there is more awareness for transsexuality more surgeries will be covered, but sadly, some are considered purely cosmetic, for now

[ashley-is-missing]

є виправдання для ненависті, це називається контекст

[neurologicallyfaultytransmedtry2]

how i be lookin at every Ukrainian post trying my best to read it knowing full well I'm gonna put it thru translate to make sure I understood correctly(all the words are literally the same with slightly different pronunciation)

[ashley-is-missing]

eyebrow raise at the last part

[ashley-is-missing]

ur account is a joke right

get off anon pussy

[ashley-is-missing]

є виправдання для ненависті, це називається контекст

[sodomit]

A rework of a graph I came up with a long time ago that describes my idea of gendered privilege vs oppression.

The idea I am trying to express here is that trans people typically start transition in the "bad [assigned label]" category and then drop down to the gender failure zone. Those few who are very lucky can eventually come out on the other side in the "bad [other label]" category. But nobody makes it to the top, and most still stay in the gender failure zone.

I think it explains some phenomena rather well, like all trans people regardless of identity being affected by all types of transphobia, or conditional male privilege that a certain narrow sector of western trans men is talking about. It also differentiates between the concepts of the bottom of the hierarchy and an underclass of womanhood.

I still feel like the graph is lacking in certain aspects, because I like the terminology "good man" vs "bad man", but I need to make it more clear somehow that it refers to social roles rather than gender identities.

Has anyone ever coined a term that refers to being judged by norms of a certain gender, rather than identifying as that gender?

Side note, I am aware of the work by Nora Hikari, but I don't consider mine to be a branch off of hers. We make some different conclusions (e.g. 5 categories vs 3, or her directly calling hers "genders", while I'm trying to avoid it) and plus, I started working on mine around 2020-2021.

[ashley-is-missing]

they actually just dont even consider being stealth a possibility. wow. de-medicalization have gone so far people dont even consider successful transition.

[sodomit]

Being stealth does not give you position comparable to cis people, cos you're still dealing with unique health issues, have trauma from many years of exposure to transphobia, and are still at risk of being outed.

Privilege isn't just "people see you as cis and are nice to you". It's the hardships you might face all alone and the way that affects your other life choices. Like you can't travel abroad with your friends if you're on DIY HRT. Or you have to avoid unverified doctors because they might out you and your physical health suffers more than an average cis person's. Or the way everything costs money, so if you don't start out very rich, you probably spend on transition the money a cis person would use for better housing or more high quality medical services. And all that stuff adds up to why you might fail performing some necessary social protocols. And it's gonna affect your life even if people have no idea you're trans.

And you also gotta acknowledge how being stealth to begin with requires more resources than the overwhelming majority of trans people has. Legislation that allows you to change gender marker, for example.

[ashley-is-missing]

i dont know what its like in the west, thank god. i dont have any "trauma" from transphobia, because its not something that you get, trauma is a more serious thing than that. you must confuse being stealth with passing. being stealth means NOBODY knows. not close ones, not friends. you are functionally cissexual by this point. there is no risk of being outed because, ideally, those medical records are sealed and done with. most doctors dont even know you are transsexual, because it is not relevant, and very rarely is. being on DYI is a whole other can of worms, i have very mixed feelings about it as a whole. being transsexual is just a medical condition that you have to live with and treat. some cissexuals have other conditions that eat up a lot of the money(of course, in normal countries the treatment for those is free for those with the diagnosis)

[sodomit]

I don't live in the west.

I also have no idea why you don't think being on the receiving end of transphobia for years isn't traumatizing. If it wasn't for you, cool, but other people aren't you.

Being outed is something that could happen regardless of whether someone knows by your choice. Transition leaves specific traces that someone who's performing various medical procedures on you may notice. Scars, or absence of scars where they should be, atypically positioned organs, and other stuff.

Also, what do you realistically expect trans people to do? Cut off ties with everyone they knew as a kid/teen/young adult, move cities, get an entirely different education from scratch? You do realize how hard it is to just avoid everyone who may have known you pre transition?

[ashley-is-missing]

people being mean to you isnt going to give you trauma. you dont get trauma from "being on the receiving end of transphobia". being upset isnt trauma.

there is no ultimate "trans mark" and everything can always be explained. there is not a single medical procedure that only transsexuals get, not a single one. some people are visibly trans, and thats just failed transition.

and yes, actually, i do expect people who want to be completely stealth to get a completely new life, and dont see it as anything out of the ordinary. why are you saying it like its something outrageous? its not.

[sodomit]

I don't think you understand how trauma works. Or what transphobia looks like in daily life.

It's not about whether you can explain something, it's about whether someone who has an ability to fuck up your life will suspect it.

You sound very detached from how poor people live.

[ashley-is-missing]

i was raised in poverty and war. i know full well what trauma is and how poor people live. you just never really had trauma, and it shows. as ive said, transsexuality is but a condition that we have to treat ourselves.

although i do have a sneaking suspicion about you, and that makes me not care about any struggles you might have went through. but im not sure about that yet, maybe you are just retarded

[sodomit]

"You never had trauma, but if you did, you deserve it" just say you ran out of arguments next time.

[ashley-is-missing]

who ran out of arguments? i was actually answering the points, unlike someone. and yeah, if my suspicions are true, you did deserve everything bad that happened to you, ever

[transandrogyny--turtlebug]

The transmedicalism that percolates in the wider trans community makes me feel like i'm losing it, hearing a sound nobody else can.

Like, claiming trans folks who don't medically transition have a privledge over those who do? Huh????? The fuck?????? Does transition ≠ doesn't desire transition; how many people would kill to get hormones and surgeries but can't? How many trans people who don't even desire hormones and surgeries are murdered for being noticable deviations to the strict binary- how many of us (binary and not) have died because we were honest about ourselves and decided not to hide it? How many trans people did hide their identities and killed themsleves because they couldn't live that lie any longer?

Why does it feel like I'm the only one who sees this? Why does everybody and their mother insist that "closet privledge" is basically real and never hurts the people who stay in the closet? Why is the assumption that a visibly trans non-medical transitioned person gets more respect than someone who has medically transitioned and generally passes???

It feels like I'm in a room with a bunch of people doing adderall and telling me its sleep pills; theyre just downright wrong. Sorry on the rant but I needed to get it out somewhere and you seem likeminded enough to understand

It really is something, fr. I'm with you on this, And there's nothing I can do about it other than be correct and complain on my tumblr- because those people have louder voices who are taken more seriously within the community

[justscorn]

this is actually retarded. how do we have louder voices?? transmeds are extremely rare in “trans” spaces, all of them are flooded with tucutes constantly talking over us. your OWN post is an obvious example of this. you got more engagement using the transmedicalist tag and spouting tucute bullshit than any actual transmedicalist has correctly using that tag.

[ashley-is-missing]

you dont get it transmeds are literally MURDERING them

[sodomit]

A rework of a graph I came up with a long time ago that describes my idea of gendered privilege vs oppression.

The idea I am trying to express here is that trans people typically start transition in the "bad [assigned label]" category and then drop down to the gender failure zone. Those few who are very lucky can eventually come out on the other side in the "bad [other label]" category. But nobody makes it to the top, and most still stay in the gender failure zone.

I think it explains some phenomena rather well, like all trans people regardless of identity being affected by all types of transphobia, or conditional male privilege that a certain narrow sector of western trans men is talking about. It also differentiates between the concepts of the bottom of the hierarchy and an underclass of womanhood.

I still feel like the graph is lacking in certain aspects, because I like the terminology "good man" vs "bad man", but I need to make it more clear somehow that it refers to social roles rather than gender identities.

Has anyone ever coined a term that refers to being judged by norms of a certain gender, rather than identifying as that gender?

Side note, I am aware of the work by Nora Hikari, but I don't consider mine to be a branch off of hers. We make some different conclusions (e.g. 5 categories vs 3, or her directly calling hers "genders", while I'm trying to avoid it) and plus, I started working on mine around 2020-2021.

[ashley-is-missing]

they actually just dont even consider being stealth a possibility. wow. de-medicalization have gone so far people dont even consider successful transition.

[sodomit]

Being stealth does not give you position comparable to cis people, cos you're still dealing with unique health issues, have trauma from many years of exposure to transphobia, and are still at risk of being outed.

Privilege isn't just "people see you as cis and are nice to you". It's the hardships you might face all alone and the way that affects your other life choices. Like you can't travel abroad with your friends if you're on DIY HRT. Or you have to avoid unverified doctors because they might out you and your physical health suffers more than an average cis person's. Or the way everything costs money, so if you don't start out very rich, you probably spend on transition the money a cis person would use for better housing or more high quality medical services. And all that stuff adds up to why you might fail performing some necessary social protocols. And it's gonna affect your life even if people have no idea you're trans.

And you also gotta acknowledge how being stealth to begin with requires more resources than the overwhelming majority of trans people has. Legislation that allows you to change gender marker, for example.

[ashley-is-missing]

i dont know what its like in the west, thank god. i dont have any "trauma" from transphobia, because its not something that you get, trauma is a more serious thing than that. you must confuse being stealth with passing. being stealth means NOBODY knows. not close ones, not friends. you are functionally cissexual by this point. there is no risk of being outed because, ideally, those medical records are sealed and done with. most doctors dont even know you are transsexual, because it is not relevant, and very rarely is. being on DYI is a whole other can of worms, i have very mixed feelings about it as a whole. being transsexual is just a medical condition that you have to live with and treat. some cissexuals have other conditions that eat up a lot of the money(of course, in normal countries the treatment for those is free for those with the diagnosis)

[sodomit]

I don't live in the west.

I also have no idea why you don't think being on the receiving end of transphobia for years isn't traumatizing. If it wasn't for you, cool, but other people aren't you.

Being outed is something that could happen regardless of whether someone knows by your choice. Transition leaves specific traces that someone who's performing various medical procedures on you may notice. Scars, or absence of scars where they should be, atypically positioned organs, and other stuff.

Also, what do you realistically expect trans people to do? Cut off ties with everyone they knew as a kid/teen/young adult, move cities, get an entirely different education from scratch? You do realize how hard it is to just avoid everyone who may have known you pre transition?

[ashley-is-missing]

people being mean to you isnt going to give you trauma. you dont get trauma from "being on the receiving end of transphobia". being upset isnt trauma.

there is no ultimate "trans mark" and everything can always be explained. there is not a single medical procedure that only transsexuals get, not a single one. some people are visibly trans, and thats just failed transition.

and yes, actually, i do expect people who want to be completely stealth to get a completely new life, and dont see it as anything out of the ordinary. why are you saying it like its something outrageous? its not.

[sodomit]

I don't think you understand how trauma works. Or what transphobia looks like in daily life.

It's not about whether you can explain something, it's about whether someone who has an ability to fuck up your life will suspect it.

You sound very detached from how poor people live.

[ashley-is-missing]

i was raised in poverty and war. i know full well what trauma is and how poor people live. you just never really had trauma, and it shows. as ive said, transsexuality is but a condition that we have to treat ourselves.

although i do have a sneaking suspicion about you, and that makes me not care about any struggles you might have went through. but im not sure about that yet, maybe you are just retarded

[noblackwomannocry]

I'm not someone that thinks fiction = reality I'm just also not stupid enough to think that it's entirely separate from it. my example is always thinking about the people on Twitter that are really into Blacked (ohhh this non-black girl is being Sexually Dominated by a Black Man, she'll be addicted to black men exclusively now) and BNWO (Black New World Order "black men rule the world and get to rape and exploit 'lesser' races"), along with Bleached (ohhh this non-white girl is being Sexually Dominated by a White Man, she'll be addicted to white men exclusively now).

if I come across a white person with a "black man rape the world" fetish I am going to assume that they are racist. would you? if I come across a non-white person with a "white man dominates Me/My Women" fetish or a non-black person with a "black man dominates Me/My Women" fetish (because many of the fetish's adherents are men with simultaneous cuckolding/humiliation fetishes and also men who think that all women of their race Belong to them, many such cases), I am also going to assume that they are racist. and in the case of the non-white person I am going to assume they hate themselves too. would you think they are racist? why or why not? do you apply that logic that applies to these race-based fetishes also apply to other fetishes that are rooted in, say, misogyny or homophobia (e.g. dykebreaking)? because I do. why or why not?

[ashley-is-missing]

if thats a huge public account about other fetishes, then yes, this person has a problem. but if someone does raceplay/misogyny/orientation play/sadomaso in private between themselves, i dont think they are racist or misogynistic or homophobic or abusive. if its a private thing then i really dont care about this stuff.

well, im white(depending on who you ask) and not a woman, so i cant speak on two of those, anyway

all those fetishes based on degradation of inherent traits are somewhat weird to me, but i dont really care.

plus, i have a great affinity for pain myself. i dont think its the healthiest thing in the world, but i also dont think that me getting hit in this context makes the person hitting me abusive

[noblackwomannocry]

why?

if someone tells you they call women subhuman whores in their own personal time away from you, does it make the action not misogynistic? is it less misogynistic if they get sexual pleasure from it? or because It's away from you?

if someone says they enjoy slave play and call black women niggers who need to know their place, but they do it away from you, does it make the action not racist? is it not racist if they get sexual pleasure from it? or because it's away from you?

what is it about deriving sexual pleasure from something that makes these things 100% cool and not indicative of anything about these people?

[ashley-is-missing]

if it wasnt about sexual pleasure and was still between two people in their private space, i still dont care about it. this is literally an outlet that doesnt harm anyone. i believe in ultimate freedom of choice, and that, however unfortunate or not, includes people doing morally dubious things to other people who want that

[noblackwomannocry]

this isn't about freedom of choice. I never said people can't choose to do whatever they'd like. this is about what those actions say about the people who do them.

freedom of choice does not mean one's choices exist in a vacuum. the choices we make indicate things about ourselves. people like you can be convinced to agree with anything because you think the meaning of people's actions is solely whatever they say those things mean and that the actions themselves mean nothing on their own. if you truly believe in freedom of choice you should also be capable of believing that those choices are informed by one's views and not just arbitrarily made, but that would require actually considering why someone would make those choices in the first place.

when you're so rotted that "would that be misogynistic or racist? well I simply wouldn't care because it does not affect me so I don't have to think about it" is your response to this I don't think you have anything of any actual value to contribute. startlingly boomer of you.

[ashley-is-missing]

i dont feel like playing out a power trip fantasy is misogynistic or racist. someone calling their girlfriend a worthless whore in the bedroom doesnt scream "misogyny" to me, because thats just one small action and isnt indicative of anything. you dont think i have anything of value to contribute simply because i disagree, and so you write off anything i may say from the start :)

[sodomit]

A rework of a graph I came up with a long time ago that describes my idea of gendered privilege vs oppression.

The idea I am trying to express here is that trans people typically start transition in the "bad [assigned label]" category and then drop down to the gender failure zone. Those few who are very lucky can eventually come out on the other side in the "bad [other label]" category. But nobody makes it to the top, and most still stay in the gender failure zone.

I think it explains some phenomena rather well, like all trans people regardless of identity being affected by all types of transphobia, or conditional male privilege that a certain narrow sector of western trans men is talking about. It also differentiates between the concepts of the bottom of the hierarchy and an underclass of womanhood.

I still feel like the graph is lacking in certain aspects, because I like the terminology "good man" vs "bad man", but I need to make it more clear somehow that it refers to social roles rather than gender identities.

Has anyone ever coined a term that refers to being judged by norms of a certain gender, rather than identifying as that gender?

Side note, I am aware of the work by Nora Hikari, but I don't consider mine to be a branch off of hers. We make some different conclusions (e.g. 5 categories vs 3, or her directly calling hers "genders", while I'm trying to avoid it) and plus, I started working on mine around 2020-2021.

[ashley-is-missing]

they actually just dont even consider being stealth a possibility. wow. de-medicalization have gone so far people dont even consider successful transition.

[sodomit]

Being stealth does not give you position comparable to cis people, cos you're still dealing with unique health issues, have trauma from many years of exposure to transphobia, and are still at risk of being outed.

Privilege isn't just "people see you as cis and are nice to you". It's the hardships you might face all alone and the way that affects your other life choices. Like you can't travel abroad with your friends if you're on DIY HRT. Or you have to avoid unverified doctors because they might out you and your physical health suffers more than an average cis person's. Or the way everything costs money, so if you don't start out very rich, you probably spend on transition the money a cis person would use for better housing or more high quality medical services. And all that stuff adds up to why you might fail performing some necessary social protocols. And it's gonna affect your life even if people have no idea you're trans.

And you also gotta acknowledge how being stealth to begin with requires more resources than the overwhelming majority of trans people has. Legislation that allows you to change gender marker, for example.

[ashley-is-missing]

i dont know what its like in the west, thank god. i dont have any "trauma" from transphobia, because its not something that you get, trauma is a more serious thing than that. you must confuse being stealth with passing. being stealth means NOBODY knows. not close ones, not friends. you are functionally cissexual by this point. there is no risk of being outed because, ideally, those medical records are sealed and done with. most doctors dont even know you are transsexual, because it is not relevant, and very rarely is. being on DYI is a whole other can of worms, i have very mixed feelings about it as a whole. being transsexual is just a medical condition that you have to live with and treat. some cissexuals have other conditions that eat up a lot of the money(of course, in normal countries the treatment for those is free for those with the diagnosis)

[sodomit]

I don't live in the west.

I also have no idea why you don't think being on the receiving end of transphobia for years isn't traumatizing. If it wasn't for you, cool, but other people aren't you.

Being outed is something that could happen regardless of whether someone knows by your choice. Transition leaves specific traces that someone who's performing various medical procedures on you may notice. Scars, or absence of scars where they should be, atypically positioned organs, and other stuff.

Also, what do you realistically expect trans people to do? Cut off ties with everyone they knew as a kid/teen/young adult, move cities, get an entirely different education from scratch? You do realize how hard it is to just avoid everyone who may have known you pre transition?

[ashley-is-missing]

people being mean to you isnt going to give you trauma. you dont get trauma from "being on the receiving end of transphobia". being upset isnt trauma.

there is no ultimate "trans mark" and everything can always be explained. there is not a single medical procedure that only transsexuals get, not a single one. some people are visibly trans, and thats just failed transition.

and yes, actually, i do expect people who want to be completely stealth to get a completely new life, and dont see it as anything out of the ordinary. why are you saying it like its something outrageous? its not.

[noblackwomannocry]

I'm not someone that thinks fiction = reality I'm just also not stupid enough to think that it's entirely separate from it. my example is always thinking about the people on Twitter that are really into Blacked (ohhh this non-black girl is being Sexually Dominated by a Black Man, she'll be addicted to black men exclusively now) and BNWO (Black New World Order "black men rule the world and get to rape and exploit 'lesser' races"), along with Bleached (ohhh this non-white girl is being Sexually Dominated by a White Man, she'll be addicted to white men exclusively now).

if I come across a white person with a "black man rape the world" fetish I am going to assume that they are racist. would you? if I come across a non-white person with a "white man dominates Me/My Women" fetish or a non-black person with a "black man dominates Me/My Women" fetish (because many of the fetish's adherents are men with simultaneous cuckolding/humiliation fetishes and also men who think that all women of their race Belong to them, many such cases), I am also going to assume that they are racist. and in the case of the non-white person I am going to assume they hate themselves too. would you think they are racist? why or why not? do you apply that logic that applies to these race-based fetishes also apply to other fetishes that are rooted in, say, misogyny or homophobia (e.g. dykebreaking)? because I do. why or why not?

[ashley-is-missing]

if thats a huge public account about other fetishes, then yes, this person has a problem. but if someone does raceplay/misogyny/orientation play/sadomaso in private between themselves, i dont think they are racist or misogynistic or homophobic or abusive. if its a private thing then i really dont care about this stuff.

well, im white(depending on who you ask) and not a woman, so i cant speak on two of those, anyway

all those fetishes based on degradation of inherent traits are somewhat weird to me, but i dont really care.

plus, i have a great affinity for pain myself. i dont think its the healthiest thing in the world, but i also dont think that me getting hit in this context makes the person hitting me abusive

[noblackwomannocry]

why?

if someone tells you they call women subhuman whores in their own personal time away from you, does it make the action not misogynistic? is it less misogynistic if they get sexual pleasure from it? or because It's away from you?

if someone says they enjoy slave play and call black women niggers who need to know their place, but they do it away from you, does it make the action not racist? is it not racist if they get sexual pleasure from it? or because it's away from you?

what is it about deriving sexual pleasure from something that makes these things 100% cool and not indicative of anything about these people?

[ashley-is-missing]

if it wasnt about sexual pleasure and was still between two people in their private space, i still dont care about it. this is literally an outlet that doesnt harm anyone. i believe in ultimate freedom of choice, and that, however unfortunate or not, includes people doing morally dubious things to other people who want that

[sodomit]

A rework of a graph I came up with a long time ago that describes my idea of gendered privilege vs oppression.

The idea I am trying to express here is that trans people typically start transition in the "bad [assigned label]" category and then drop down to the gender failure zone. Those few who are very lucky can eventually come out on the other side in the "bad [other label]" category. But nobody makes it to the top, and most still stay in the gender failure zone.

I think it explains some phenomena rather well, like all trans people regardless of identity being affected by all types of transphobia, or conditional male privilege that a certain narrow sector of western trans men is talking about. It also differentiates between the concepts of the bottom of the hierarchy and an underclass of womanhood.

I still feel like the graph is lacking in certain aspects, because I like the terminology "good man" vs "bad man", but I need to make it more clear somehow that it refers to social roles rather than gender identities.

Has anyone ever coined a term that refers to being judged by norms of a certain gender, rather than identifying as that gender?

Side note, I am aware of the work by Nora Hikari, but I don't consider mine to be a branch off of hers. We make some different conclusions (e.g. 5 categories vs 3, or her directly calling hers "genders", while I'm trying to avoid it) and plus, I started working on mine around 2020-2021.

[ashley-is-missing]

they actually just dont even consider being stealth a possibility. wow. de-medicalization have gone so far people dont even consider successful transition.

[sodomit]

Being stealth does not give you position comparable to cis people, cos you're still dealing with unique health issues, have trauma from many years of exposure to transphobia, and are still at risk of being outed.

Privilege isn't just "people see you as cis and are nice to you". It's the hardships you might face all alone and the way that affects your other life choices. Like you can't travel abroad with your friends if you're on DIY HRT. Or you have to avoid unverified doctors because they might out you and your physical health suffers more than an average cis person's. Or the way everything costs money, so if you don't start out very rich, you probably spend on transition the money a cis person would use for better housing or more high quality medical services. And all that stuff adds up to why you might fail performing some necessary social protocols. And it's gonna affect your life even if people have no idea you're trans.

And you also gotta acknowledge how being stealth to begin with requires more resources than the overwhelming majority of trans people has. Legislation that allows you to change gender marker, for example.

[ashley-is-missing]

i dont know what its like in the west, thank god. i dont have any "trauma" from transphobia, because its not something that you get, trauma is a more serious thing than that. you must confuse being stealth with passing. being stealth means NOBODY knows. not close ones, not friends. you are functionally cissexual by this point. there is no risk of being outed because, ideally, those medical records are sealed and done with. most doctors dont even know you are transsexual, because it is not relevant, and very rarely is. being on DYI is a whole other can of worms, i have very mixed feelings about it as a whole. being transsexual is just a medical condition that you have to live with and treat. some cissexuals have other conditions that eat up a lot of the money(of course, in normal countries the treatment for those is free for those with the diagnosis)