Ask Keith Kogane

Ask my boy Keith

[ask-keith-kogane]

this should post where I want it to (please)

anyways so you can ask Keith pretty much anything but I do have some rules

I love when people send asks so send away!

Dont

Say anything TOO sexual (suggesting is OK ig)

Any hate (he is just a baby 🥺)

You can

Simp for him

Ask questions (duh)

Send art if you want for him to react to

Idk what else lmao

You can throw things at him he deserves it for denying his emo heritage

Emoji anons are welcome! The ones I put up here are already taken: 🎻 💍 🔫 🪄

I'm new to here so I'm learning as I go 👀

[ask-keith-kogane]

Yo what's up I'm still alive

Guys I didn't die i just dissappeared into the void

[ask-keith-kogane]

it only got worse who cursed me

[ask-keith-kogane]

Yo what's up I'm still alive

Guys I didn't die i just dissappeared into the void

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

“I only kidnapped you once. Where are you getting these other times? Hay, come back here!”

Chases after Keith.

He still has to keep him distracted for Lance.

How long is it gonna take for Lance to clean up his mess anyway?

“Hay! Don’t walk away from me. I’m talking to you. Ok fine I’ll drop the whole ass eating thing. You ate cardboard ass and you don’t want to talk about it. You don’t kiss and tell, I get it.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith keeps walking/running away*

Keith: I DID NOT EAT CARDBOARD ASS

Keith: I DONT EAT ANY ASS I SAID IT TASTED LIKE ASS BECAUSE IT TASTED BAD

*Meanwhile Lance has cleaned up the mess a while ago and I totally didn't forget about it*

[the-vampire-lance]

“Ok sure, whaaaaatevvvveeeer you say. Lol” 😏

Lance teleports in front of Keith and grins as Keith runs straight into his arm.

He wraps his arms around Keith and cheekily says.

“Hay there, going my way? 😉

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith was surprised when you teleported in front of him and tried to stop but you still got him*

Keith: LET GOOO

*Keith tried pushing you off*

Keith: go bug your own Keith!

[the-vampire-lance]

“Lol nope! I caught you, now you’re mine!” Lance laughed as he started cuddling Keith.

“One of these days I got to make my special eclair cake for you and lance. And before you say anything, it’s not called special because of being filled with marijuana. It doesn’t have drugs in it! It’s called special cause it’s made specifically for people who can’t have dairy. It’s made with non dairy ingredients like whip cream and milk. It’s my sire’s recipe that she taught me how to make and I tweaked it for people with dairy restrictions.” He says as he nuzzles Keith’s hair.  

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith started screaming when you cuddled him*

Keith: LET GO OF ME IM NOT A TOY

*Keith gave you a side eye*

Keith: I'm still eating dairy no matter what I will pour milk on the cake and put whipped cream on it

[the-vampire-lance]

“Not a toy but you are a cuddly teddy bear…. An aggressive stabby emo teddy bear, but a teddy bear all the same.”

Gives Keith a squishy hug.

“You can’t pour milk on an eclair cake. Dairy or non dairy, That would ruin it. I swear your just as bad as my Keith. He’d literally eat month old salmon right out of a can. But I’m not gonna let you do that cause count raspberry is gonna turn you first muahaha.”

proceeds to blow raspberries into Keith’s neck.

“Ahahaha now you’re my bride.. my raspberry bride muahahaha! XD” blows more raspberries in Keith’s neck.

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith growled*

Keith: I'm not some teddy bear!

Keith: I WILL DO WHATEVER I WANT TO! IF I WANT TO ADD MILK TO IT I WILL

*he wriggles and yelps when you blow raspberries on him*

Keith: YOU KISS YOUR OWN KEITH

*He pulls you off him*

Keith: and stop kissing ME

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

“I only kidnapped you once. Where are you getting these other times? Hay, come back here!”

Chases after Keith.

He still has to keep him distracted for Lance.

How long is it gonna take for Lance to clean up his mess anyway?

“Hay! Don’t walk away from me. I’m talking to you. Ok fine I’ll drop the whole ass eating thing. You ate cardboard ass and you don’t want to talk about it. You don’t kiss and tell, I get it.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith keeps walking/running away*

Keith: I DID NOT EAT CARDBOARD ASS

Keith: I DONT EAT ANY ASS I SAID IT TASTED LIKE ASS BECAUSE IT TASTED BAD

*Meanwhile Lance has cleaned up the mess a while ago and I totally didn't forget about it*

[the-vampire-lance]

“Ok sure, whaaaaatevvvveeeer you say. Lol” 😏

Lance teleports in front of Keith and grins as Keith runs straight into his arm.

He wraps his arms around Keith and cheekily says.

“Hay there, going my way? 😉

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith was surprised when you teleported in front of him and tried to stop but you still got him*

Keith: LET GOOO

*Keith tried pushing you off*

Keith: go bug your own Keith!

[the-vampire-lance]

“Lol nope! I caught you, now you’re mine!” Lance laughed as he started cuddling Keith.

“One of these days I got to make my special eclair cake for you and lance. And before you say anything, it’s not called special because of being filled with marijuana. It doesn’t have drugs in it! It’s called special cause it’s made specifically for people who can’t have dairy. It’s made with non dairy ingredients like whip cream and milk. It’s my sire’s recipe that she taught me how to make and I tweaked it for people with dairy restrictions.” He says as he nuzzles Keith’s hair.  

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith started screaming when you cuddled him*

Keith: LET GO OF ME IM NOT A TOY

*Keith gave you a side eye*

Keith: I'm still eating dairy no matter what I will pour milk on the cake and put whipped cream on it

[the-vampire-lance]

“Not a toy but you are a cuddly teddy bear…. An aggressive stabby emo teddy bear, but a teddy bear all the same.”

Gives Keith a squishy hug.

“You can’t pour milk on an eclair cake. Dairy or non dairy, That would ruin it. I swear your just as bad as my Keith. He’d literally eat month old salmon right out of a can. But I’m not gonna let you do that cause count raspberry is gonna turn you first muahaha.”

proceeds to blow raspberries into Keith’s neck.

“Ahahaha now you’re my bride.. my raspberry bride muahahaha! XD” blows more raspberries in Keith’s neck.

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

“I only kidnapped you once. Where are you getting these other times? Hay, come back here!”

Chases after Keith.

He still has to keep him distracted for Lance.

How long is it gonna take for Lance to clean up his mess anyway?

“Hay! Don’t walk away from me. I’m talking to you. Ok fine I’ll drop the whole ass eating thing. You ate cardboard ass and you don’t want to talk about it. You don’t kiss and tell, I get it.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith keeps walking/running away*

Keith: I DID NOT EAT CARDBOARD ASS

Keith: I DONT EAT ANY ASS I SAID IT TASTED LIKE ASS BECAUSE IT TASTED BAD

*Meanwhile Lance has cleaned up the mess a while ago and I totally didn't forget about it*

[the-vampire-lance]

“Ok sure, whaaaaatevvvveeeer you say. Lol” 😏

Lance teleports in front of Keith and grins as Keith runs straight into his arm.

He wraps his arms around Keith and cheekily says.

“Hay there, going my way? 😉

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith was surprised when you teleported in front of him and tried to stop but you still got him*

Keith: LET GOOO

*Keith tried pushing you off*

Keith: go bug your own Keith!

[the-vampire-lance]

“Lol nope! I caught you, now you’re mine!” Lance laughed as he started cuddling Keith.

“One of these days I got to make my special eclair cake for you and lance. And before you say anything, it’s not called special because of being filled with marijuana. It doesn’t have drugs in it! It’s called special cause it’s made specifically for people who can’t have dairy. It’s made with non dairy ingredients like whip cream and milk. It’s my sire’s recipe that she taught me how to make and I tweaked it for people with dairy restrictions.” He says as he nuzzles Keith’s hair.  

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith started screaming when you cuddled him*

Keith: LET GO OF ME IM NOT A TOY

*Keith gave you a side eye*

Keith: I'm still eating dairy no matter what I will pour milk on the cake and put whipped cream on it

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

“I only kidnapped you once. Where are you getting these other times? Hay, come back here!”

Chases after Keith.

He still has to keep him distracted for Lance.

How long is it gonna take for Lance to clean up his mess anyway?

“Hay! Don’t walk away from me. I’m talking to you. Ok fine I’ll drop the whole ass eating thing. You ate cardboard ass and you don’t want to talk about it. You don’t kiss and tell, I get it.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith keeps walking/running away*

Keith: I DID NOT EAT CARDBOARD ASS

Keith: I DONT EAT ANY ASS I SAID IT TASTED LIKE ASS BECAUSE IT TASTED BAD

*Meanwhile Lance has cleaned up the mess a while ago and I totally didn't forget about it*

[the-vampire-lance]

“Ok sure, whaaaaatevvvveeeer you say. Lol” 😏

Lance teleports in front of Keith and grins as Keith runs straight into his arm.

He wraps his arms around Keith and cheekily says.

“Hay there, going my way? 😉

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith was surprised when you teleported in front of him and tried to stop but you still got him*

Keith: LET GOOO

*Keith tried pushing you off*

Keith: go bug your own Keith!

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

“I only kidnapped you once. Where are you getting these other times? Hay, come back here!”

Chases after Keith.

He still has to keep him distracted for Lance.

How long is it gonna take for Lance to clean up his mess anyway?

“Hay! Don’t walk away from me. I’m talking to you. Ok fine I’ll drop the whole ass eating thing. You ate cardboard ass and you don’t want to talk about it. You don’t kiss and tell, I get it.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith keeps walking/running away*

Keith: I DID NOT EAT CARDBOARD ASS

Keith: I DONT EAT ANY ASS I SAID IT TASTED LIKE ASS BECAUSE IT TASTED BAD

*Meanwhile Lance has cleaned up the mess a while ago and I totally didn't forget about it*

[ask-keith-kogane]

Im gonna kiss you bitch

Keith: no

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance cocked an eyebrow at this.

“Oh you think I won’t do it? And you think I won’t come up with ways to make you take your medicine?”

Lance then held Keith’s chin, looked Keith square in the eyes, began his hypnosis and said “TRY. ME.”

“You want to Take your medicine Keith… you don’t want to make everyone sad do you?… if you die… everyone will be sad…. Especially shiro…. Shiro would be very disappointed in you…. You don’t want him to be disappointed in you do you?…. Take your medicine…. So shiro doesn’t have to be sad… he would miss you terribly if you died.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

(I AM SO SORRY I COMPLETELY FORGOT)

Keith: nope!

*Keith refused to open his eyes and fought against looking at you*

Keith: SHIRO CAN BE SAD, I WONT DIE

Keith: HE WONT BE DISAPPOINTED IN ME, IM A MAN I DONT NEED ANY MEDICINE FOR DUMB THINGS LIKE THIS

Keith: I LIVED WITHOUT IT MOST OF MY LIFE I DONT NEED IT

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance looked at Keith deadpanned. “Ok you want to play it like that. We can do that. Mamma bird time!”

Lance poured the medicine into his mouth then grabbed Keith’s head, pulled Keith against him and smashed his mouth against Keith’s in a deep kiss. Forcing the medicine down his throat.

Though Lance was starting to regret doing it cause after tasting the medicine, he wanted to spit it out.

It was yucky.

Why does altean medicine or any kind of medicine have to taste awful?

He felt a little bad that he was forcing Keith to drink this but it was to keep him from dying.

A little liquid death to keep death away was necessary.

Lance was mentally screaming in his head as he forced the liquid into Keith’s mouth.

‘Ew! Ew! Ew! Drink the disgusting medicine mullet!’

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: NO, GET AWAY FROM ME

*he tried getting out of the bed and away from you*

*Keith was fighting you off*

Keith: EW DONT KISS ME

*He was flailing around and trying to push your lips off his*

*he just spit the medicine right back in your mouth*

[the-vampire-lance]

Lances mind screaming ‘ew ew ew ew ew don’t spit it out! Take the damn medicine!’

At this point, Lance was pretty much in a little pushing war with Keith. Both side were trying to push the medicine into the other’s mouth. Neither side was winning. Lance couldn’t seem to get the medicine to go down Keith’s throat.

then lance got an idea.

Without a second thought, Lance reached down and grabbed Keith’s ass hard.

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith was caught off guard and yelped, not expecting that as you got the medicine down his throat*

Keith: EW IT TASTES LIKE ASS AND IT BURNS

*Keith wanted to gag*

*Keith looked up at Lance with a scowl*

Keith: ...I hate you

[the-vampire-lance]

After pulling away, Lance started gagging. It took every bit of self control not to throw up. He even grabbed a wash cloth and started trying to wipe the medicine off his tongue.

“Yeah that’s fair. I hate myself right now too. My mouth hates me. I hate the altean who came up with this medicine. Seriously coran, do you guys have to make medicine that taste so god awful?! First the paladin lunch, then nunvil and now this?! What the hell kind of taste buds do you alteans have?!”

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: it's your fault your mouth tastes like dirty ass

*Keith ran out to wash his mouth out with water, gagging*

Keith, queasy: I'm gonna hurl...

*it sounds like he is screaming in the bathroom and trying to wash his mouth out*

Keith: now I know what Hunk feels...

[the-vampire-lance]

“It’s not my mouth, it’s the medicine!”

Then lance blinks.

“Wait… how do you even know what dirty ass tastes like?”

Then lance digs around in his bag.

“Anyway let me make it up to you. Here’s a hand full of lollipops and a hand full of mints…. I’m just gonna take a mint.”

Takes a mint for himself and pops it in his mouth. Then holds out the two handfuls to Keith.

[ask-keith-kogane]

*he took the mints and shoved them in his mouth to overpower the gross medicine taste*

Keith, with his mouth full : don't question it

Keith: also thanks

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance smirked. “What you don’t want a lollipop? You can have as many as you want. Usually my Keith would grab both hand fulls and stuff um in his fanny pack. He likes sweets.”

While lance was freaking out over getting Keith sick, he completely forgot about the fact that he was supposed to distract Keith while other Lance was getting rid of the evidence.

Not how I wanted to go about distracting Keith but it works out. I hope I bought Lance enough time to clean up his mess.

“Sooooo ass? Have you eaten ass before dude? “ he’s gonna mess with Keith a little over this.

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: You probably put medicine on those lollipops or something gross... mints are just safer

*he was about to leave when you asked him if he has eaten ass before*

*he turned around, red faced*

Keith: no I have NOT and even if i did it's none of your business

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance burst out laughing and wiped a tear from his eye.

“Omg really? You’d think I’d be smart enough to spike lolly pops with drugs???

I’m gonna be honest with you, I’ve never actually thought of that. But thanks for the idea. I might try to figure out how to do that in the future. My Keith will never see it coming.”

Then after Keith’s response to the ass question, he wore a smug grin.

“Oh yeah? Your response and your red face tell me you have. Whose ass was it? Was it Lance’s? …. Or maybe Gerard Way? 😏”

“I did bring your cardboard cut out of Gerard Way to life…. Did you eat cardboard ass? I bet you did. 😆”

[ask-keith-kogane]

You kidnapped me on multiple occasions, why would I trust you

*he scoffed*

Okay fine, your not smart

You happy now?

*Keith just walked out on you, not answering your questions about eating ass*

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance cocked an eyebrow at this.

“Oh you think I won’t do it? And you think I won’t come up with ways to make you take your medicine?”

Lance then held Keith’s chin, looked Keith square in the eyes, began his hypnosis and said “TRY. ME.”

“You want to Take your medicine Keith… you don’t want to make everyone sad do you?… if you die… everyone will be sad…. Especially shiro…. Shiro would be very disappointed in you…. You don’t want him to be disappointed in you do you?…. Take your medicine…. So shiro doesn’t have to be sad… he would miss you terribly if you died.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

(I AM SO SORRY I COMPLETELY FORGOT)

Keith: nope!

*Keith refused to open his eyes and fought against looking at you*

Keith: SHIRO CAN BE SAD, I WONT DIE

Keith: HE WONT BE DISAPPOINTED IN ME, IM A MAN I DONT NEED ANY MEDICINE FOR DUMB THINGS LIKE THIS

Keith: I LIVED WITHOUT IT MOST OF MY LIFE I DONT NEED IT

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance looked at Keith deadpanned. “Ok you want to play it like that. We can do that. Mamma bird time!”

Lance poured the medicine into his mouth then grabbed Keith’s head, pulled Keith against him and smashed his mouth against Keith’s in a deep kiss. Forcing the medicine down his throat.

Though Lance was starting to regret doing it cause after tasting the medicine, he wanted to spit it out.

It was yucky.

Why does altean medicine or any kind of medicine have to taste awful?

He felt a little bad that he was forcing Keith to drink this but it was to keep him from dying.

A little liquid death to keep death away was necessary.

Lance was mentally screaming in his head as he forced the liquid into Keith’s mouth.

‘Ew! Ew! Ew! Drink the disgusting medicine mullet!’

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: NO, GET AWAY FROM ME

*he tried getting out of the bed and away from you*

*Keith was fighting you off*

Keith: EW DONT KISS ME

*He was flailing around and trying to push your lips off his*

*he just spit the medicine right back in your mouth*

[the-vampire-lance]

Lances mind screaming ‘ew ew ew ew ew don’t spit it out! Take the damn medicine!’

At this point, Lance was pretty much in a little pushing war with Keith. Both side were trying to push the medicine into the other’s mouth. Neither side was winning. Lance couldn’t seem to get the medicine to go down Keith’s throat.

then lance got an idea.

Without a second thought, Lance reached down and grabbed Keith’s ass hard.

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith was caught off guard and yelped, not expecting that as you got the medicine down his throat*

Keith: EW IT TASTES LIKE ASS AND IT BURNS

*Keith wanted to gag*

*Keith looked up at Lance with a scowl*

Keith: ...I hate you

[the-vampire-lance]

After pulling away, Lance started gagging. It took every bit of self control not to throw up. He even grabbed a wash cloth and started trying to wipe the medicine off his tongue.

“Yeah that’s fair. I hate myself right now too. My mouth hates me. I hate the altean who came up with this medicine. Seriously coran, do you guys have to make medicine that taste so god awful?! First the paladin lunch, then nunvil and now this?! What the hell kind of taste buds do you alteans have?!”

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: it's your fault your mouth tastes like dirty ass

*Keith ran out to wash his mouth out with water, gagging*

Keith, queasy: I'm gonna hurl...

*it sounds like he is screaming in the bathroom and trying to wash his mouth out*

Keith: now I know what Hunk feels...

[the-vampire-lance]

“It’s not my mouth, it’s the medicine!”

Then lance blinks.

“Wait… how do you even know what dirty ass tastes like?”

Then lance digs around in his bag.

“Anyway let me make it up to you. Here’s a hand full of lollipops and a hand full of mints…. I’m just gonna take a mint.”

Takes a mint for himself and pops it in his mouth. Then holds out the two handfuls to Keith.

[ask-keith-kogane]

*he took the mints and shoved them in his mouth to overpower the gross medicine taste*

Keith, with his mouth full : don't question it

Keith: also thanks

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance smirked. “What you don’t want a lollipop? You can have as many as you want. Usually my Keith would grab both hand fulls and stuff um in his fanny pack. He likes sweets.”

While lance was freaking out over getting Keith sick, he completely forgot about the fact that he was supposed to distract Keith while other Lance was getting rid of the evidence.

Not how I wanted to go about distracting Keith but it works out. I hope I bought Lance enough time to clean up his mess.

“Sooooo ass? Have you eaten ass before dude? “ he’s gonna mess with Keith a little over this.

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: You probably put medicine on those lollipops or something gross... mints are just safer

*he was about to leave when you asked him if he has eaten ass before*

*he turned around, red faced*

Keith: no I have NOT and even if i did it's none of your business

[ask-keith-kogane]

(IM SO SORRY I MISSED IT)

Keith, in a suit and tie: Great card

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance cocked an eyebrow at this.

“Oh you think I won’t do it? And you think I won’t come up with ways to make you take your medicine?”

Lance then held Keith’s chin, looked Keith square in the eyes, began his hypnosis and said “TRY. ME.”

“You want to Take your medicine Keith… you don’t want to make everyone sad do you?… if you die… everyone will be sad…. Especially shiro…. Shiro would be very disappointed in you…. You don’t want him to be disappointed in you do you?…. Take your medicine…. So shiro doesn’t have to be sad… he would miss you terribly if you died.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

(I AM SO SORRY I COMPLETELY FORGOT)

Keith: nope!

*Keith refused to open his eyes and fought against looking at you*

Keith: SHIRO CAN BE SAD, I WONT DIE

Keith: HE WONT BE DISAPPOINTED IN ME, IM A MAN I DONT NEED ANY MEDICINE FOR DUMB THINGS LIKE THIS

Keith: I LIVED WITHOUT IT MOST OF MY LIFE I DONT NEED IT

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance looked at Keith deadpanned. “Ok you want to play it like that. We can do that. Mamma bird time!”

Lance poured the medicine into his mouth then grabbed Keith’s head, pulled Keith against him and smashed his mouth against Keith’s in a deep kiss. Forcing the medicine down his throat.

Though Lance was starting to regret doing it cause after tasting the medicine, he wanted to spit it out.

It was yucky.

Why does altean medicine or any kind of medicine have to taste awful?

He felt a little bad that he was forcing Keith to drink this but it was to keep him from dying.

A little liquid death to keep death away was necessary.

Lance was mentally screaming in his head as he forced the liquid into Keith’s mouth.

‘Ew! Ew! Ew! Drink the disgusting medicine mullet!’

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: NO, GET AWAY FROM ME

*he tried getting out of the bed and away from you*

*Keith was fighting you off*

Keith: EW DONT KISS ME

*He was flailing around and trying to push your lips off his*

*he just spit the medicine right back in your mouth*

[the-vampire-lance]

Lances mind screaming ‘ew ew ew ew ew don’t spit it out! Take the damn medicine!’

At this point, Lance was pretty much in a little pushing war with Keith. Both side were trying to push the medicine into the other’s mouth. Neither side was winning. Lance couldn’t seem to get the medicine to go down Keith’s throat.

then lance got an idea.

Without a second thought, Lance reached down and grabbed Keith’s ass hard.

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith was caught off guard and yelped, not expecting that as you got the medicine down his throat*

Keith: EW IT TASTES LIKE ASS AND IT BURNS

*Keith wanted to gag*

*Keith looked up at Lance with a scowl*

Keith: ...I hate you

[the-vampire-lance]

After pulling away, Lance started gagging. It took every bit of self control not to throw up. He even grabbed a wash cloth and started trying to wipe the medicine off his tongue.

“Yeah that’s fair. I hate myself right now too. My mouth hates me. I hate the altean who came up with this medicine. Seriously coran, do you guys have to make medicine that taste so god awful?! First the paladin lunch, then nunvil and now this?! What the hell kind of taste buds do you alteans have?!”

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: it's your fault your mouth tastes like dirty ass

*Keith ran out to wash his mouth out with water, gagging*

Keith, queasy: I'm gonna hurl...

*it sounds like he is screaming in the bathroom and trying to wash his mouth out*

Keith: now I know what Hunk feels...

[the-vampire-lance]

“It’s not my mouth, it’s the medicine!”

Then lance blinks.

“Wait… how do you even know what dirty ass tastes like?”

Then lance digs around in his bag.

“Anyway let me make it up to you. Here’s a hand full of lollipops and a hand full of mints…. I’m just gonna take a mint.”

Takes a mint for himself and pops it in his mouth. Then holds out the two handfuls to Keith.

[ask-keith-kogane]

*he took the mints and shoved them in his mouth to overpower the gross medicine taste*

Keith, with his mouth full : don't question it

Keith: also thanks

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance cocked an eyebrow at this.

“Oh you think I won’t do it? And you think I won’t come up with ways to make you take your medicine?”

Lance then held Keith’s chin, looked Keith square in the eyes, began his hypnosis and said “TRY. ME.”

“You want to Take your medicine Keith… you don’t want to make everyone sad do you?… if you die… everyone will be sad…. Especially shiro…. Shiro would be very disappointed in you…. You don’t want him to be disappointed in you do you?…. Take your medicine…. So shiro doesn’t have to be sad… he would miss you terribly if you died.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

(I AM SO SORRY I COMPLETELY FORGOT)

Keith: nope!

*Keith refused to open his eyes and fought against looking at you*

Keith: SHIRO CAN BE SAD, I WONT DIE

Keith: HE WONT BE DISAPPOINTED IN ME, IM A MAN I DONT NEED ANY MEDICINE FOR DUMB THINGS LIKE THIS

Keith: I LIVED WITHOUT IT MOST OF MY LIFE I DONT NEED IT

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance looked at Keith deadpanned. “Ok you want to play it like that. We can do that. Mamma bird time!”

Lance poured the medicine into his mouth then grabbed Keith’s head, pulled Keith against him and smashed his mouth against Keith’s in a deep kiss. Forcing the medicine down his throat.

Though Lance was starting to regret doing it cause after tasting the medicine, he wanted to spit it out.

It was yucky.

Why does altean medicine or any kind of medicine have to taste awful?

He felt a little bad that he was forcing Keith to drink this but it was to keep him from dying.

A little liquid death to keep death away was necessary.

Lance was mentally screaming in his head as he forced the liquid into Keith’s mouth.

‘Ew! Ew! Ew! Drink the disgusting medicine mullet!’

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: NO, GET AWAY FROM ME

*he tried getting out of the bed and away from you*

*Keith was fighting you off*

Keith: EW DONT KISS ME

*He was flailing around and trying to push your lips off his*

*he just spit the medicine right back in your mouth*

[the-vampire-lance]

Lances mind screaming ‘ew ew ew ew ew don’t spit it out! Take the damn medicine!’

At this point, Lance was pretty much in a little pushing war with Keith. Both side were trying to push the medicine into the other’s mouth. Neither side was winning. Lance couldn’t seem to get the medicine to go down Keith’s throat.

then lance got an idea.

Without a second thought, Lance reached down and grabbed Keith’s ass hard.

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith was caught off guard and yelped, not expecting that as you got the medicine down his throat*

Keith: EW IT TASTES LIKE ASS AND IT BURNS

*Keith wanted to gag*

*Keith looked up at Lance with a scowl*

Keith: ...I hate you

[the-vampire-lance]

After pulling away, Lance started gagging. It took every bit of self control not to throw up. He even grabbed a wash cloth and started trying to wipe the medicine off his tongue.

“Yeah that’s fair. I hate myself right now too. My mouth hates me. I hate the altean who came up with this medicine. Seriously coran, do you guys have to make medicine that taste so god awful?! First the paladin lunch, then nunvil and now this?! What the hell kind of taste buds do you alteans have?!”

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: it's your fault your mouth tastes like dirty ass

*Keith ran out to wash his mouth out with water, gagging*

Keith, queasy: I'm gonna hurl...

*it sounds like he is screaming in the bathroom and trying to wash his mouth out*

Keith: now I know what Hunk feels...

[the-vampire-lance]

“It’s not my mouth, it’s the medicine!”

Then lance blinks.

“Wait… how do you even know what dirty ass tastes like?”

Then lance digs around in his bag.

“Anyway let me make it up to you. Here’s a hand full of lollipops and a hand full of mints…. I’m just gonna take a mint.”

Takes a mint for himself and pops it in his mouth. Then holds out the two handfuls to Keith.

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance cocked an eyebrow at this.

“Oh you think I won’t do it? And you think I won’t come up with ways to make you take your medicine?”

Lance then held Keith’s chin, looked Keith square in the eyes, began his hypnosis and said “TRY. ME.”

“You want to Take your medicine Keith… you don’t want to make everyone sad do you?… if you die… everyone will be sad…. Especially shiro…. Shiro would be very disappointed in you…. You don’t want him to be disappointed in you do you?…. Take your medicine…. So shiro doesn’t have to be sad… he would miss you terribly if you died.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

(I AM SO SORRY I COMPLETELY FORGOT)

Keith: nope!

*Keith refused to open his eyes and fought against looking at you*

Keith: SHIRO CAN BE SAD, I WONT DIE

Keith: HE WONT BE DISAPPOINTED IN ME, IM A MAN I DONT NEED ANY MEDICINE FOR DUMB THINGS LIKE THIS

Keith: I LIVED WITHOUT IT MOST OF MY LIFE I DONT NEED IT

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance looked at Keith deadpanned. “Ok you want to play it like that. We can do that. Mamma bird time!”

Lance poured the medicine into his mouth then grabbed Keith’s head, pulled Keith against him and smashed his mouth against Keith’s in a deep kiss. Forcing the medicine down his throat.

Though Lance was starting to regret doing it cause after tasting the medicine, he wanted to spit it out.

It was yucky.

Why does altean medicine or any kind of medicine have to taste awful?

He felt a little bad that he was forcing Keith to drink this but it was to keep him from dying.

A little liquid death to keep death away was necessary.

Lance was mentally screaming in his head as he forced the liquid into Keith’s mouth.

‘Ew! Ew! Ew! Drink the disgusting medicine mullet!’

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: NO, GET AWAY FROM ME

*he tried getting out of the bed and away from you*

*Keith was fighting you off*

Keith: EW DONT KISS ME

*He was flailing around and trying to push your lips off his*

*he just spit the medicine right back in your mouth*

[the-vampire-lance]

Lances mind screaming ‘ew ew ew ew ew don’t spit it out! Take the damn medicine!’

At this point, Lance was pretty much in a little pushing war with Keith. Both side were trying to push the medicine into the other’s mouth. Neither side was winning. Lance couldn’t seem to get the medicine to go down Keith’s throat.

then lance got an idea.

Without a second thought, Lance reached down and grabbed Keith’s ass hard.

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith was caught off guard and yelped, not expecting that as you got the medicine down his throat*

Keith: EW IT TASTES LIKE ASS AND IT BURNS

*Keith wanted to gag*

*Keith looked up at Lance with a scowl*

Keith: ...I hate you

[the-vampire-lance]

After pulling away, Lance started gagging. It took every bit of self control not to throw up. He even grabbed a wash cloth and started trying to wipe the medicine off his tongue.

“Yeah that’s fair. I hate myself right now too. My mouth hates me. I hate the altean who came up with this medicine. Seriously coran, do you guys have to make medicine that taste so god awful?! First the paladin lunch, then nunvil and now this?! What the hell kind of taste buds do you alteans have?!”

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: it's your fault your mouth tastes like dirty ass

*Keith ran out to wash his mouth out with water, gagging*

Keith, queasy: I'm gonna hurl...

*it sounds like he is screaming in the bathroom and trying to wash his mouth out*

Keith: now I know what Hunk feels...

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance cocked an eyebrow at this.

“Oh you think I won’t do it? And you think I won’t come up with ways to make you take your medicine?”

Lance then held Keith’s chin, looked Keith square in the eyes, began his hypnosis and said “TRY. ME.”

“You want to Take your medicine Keith… you don’t want to make everyone sad do you?… if you die… everyone will be sad…. Especially shiro…. Shiro would be very disappointed in you…. You don’t want him to be disappointed in you do you?…. Take your medicine…. So shiro doesn’t have to be sad… he would miss you terribly if you died.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

(I AM SO SORRY I COMPLETELY FORGOT)

Keith: nope!

*Keith refused to open his eyes and fought against looking at you*

Keith: SHIRO CAN BE SAD, I WONT DIE

Keith: HE WONT BE DISAPPOINTED IN ME, IM A MAN I DONT NEED ANY MEDICINE FOR DUMB THINGS LIKE THIS

Keith: I LIVED WITHOUT IT MOST OF MY LIFE I DONT NEED IT

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance looked at Keith deadpanned. “Ok you want to play it like that. We can do that. Mamma bird time!”

Lance poured the medicine into his mouth then grabbed Keith’s head, pulled Keith against him and smashed his mouth against Keith’s in a deep kiss. Forcing the medicine down his throat.

Though Lance was starting to regret doing it cause after tasting the medicine, he wanted to spit it out.

It was yucky.

Why does altean medicine or any kind of medicine have to taste awful?

He felt a little bad that he was forcing Keith to drink this but it was to keep him from dying.

A little liquid death to keep death away was necessary.

Lance was mentally screaming in his head as he forced the liquid into Keith’s mouth.

‘Ew! Ew! Ew! Drink the disgusting medicine mullet!’

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: NO, GET AWAY FROM ME

*he tried getting out of the bed and away from you*

*Keith was fighting you off*

Keith: EW DONT KISS ME

*He was flailing around and trying to push your lips off his*

*he just spit the medicine right back in your mouth*

[the-vampire-lance]

Lances mind screaming ‘ew ew ew ew ew don’t spit it out! Take the damn medicine!’

At this point, Lance was pretty much in a little pushing war with Keith. Both side were trying to push the medicine into the other’s mouth. Neither side was winning. Lance couldn’t seem to get the medicine to go down Keith’s throat.

then lance got an idea.

Without a second thought, Lance reached down and grabbed Keith’s ass hard.

[ask-keith-kogane]

*Keith was caught off guard and yelped, not expecting that as you got the medicine down his throat*

Keith: EW IT TASTES LIKE ASS AND IT BURNS

*Keith wanted to gag*

*Keith looked up at Lance with a scowl*

Keith: ...I hate you

[ask-keith-kogane]

(Hangs upside down above Keith and covers his eyes) GUESS WHO! 😁

Keith: huh- NOT YOU AGAIN

*he backs away and pulls out the knife*

Keith: YOUR NOT WIFEING ME UP

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance cocked an eyebrow at this.

“Oh you think I won’t do it? And you think I won’t come up with ways to make you take your medicine?”

Lance then held Keith’s chin, looked Keith square in the eyes, began his hypnosis and said “TRY. ME.”

“You want to Take your medicine Keith… you don’t want to make everyone sad do you?… if you die… everyone will be sad…. Especially shiro…. Shiro would be very disappointed in you…. You don’t want him to be disappointed in you do you?…. Take your medicine…. So shiro doesn’t have to be sad… he would miss you terribly if you died.”

[ask-keith-kogane]

(I AM SO SORRY I COMPLETELY FORGOT)

Keith: nope!

*Keith refused to open his eyes and fought against looking at you*

Keith: SHIRO CAN BE SAD, I WONT DIE

Keith: HE WONT BE DISAPPOINTED IN ME, IM A MAN I DONT NEED ANY MEDICINE FOR DUMB THINGS LIKE THIS

Keith: I LIVED WITHOUT IT MOST OF MY LIFE I DONT NEED IT

[the-vampire-lance]

Lance looked at Keith deadpanned. “Ok you want to play it like that. We can do that. Mamma bird time!”

Lance poured the medicine into his mouth then grabbed Keith’s head, pulled Keith against him and smashed his mouth against Keith’s in a deep kiss. Forcing the medicine down his throat.

Though Lance was starting to regret doing it cause after tasting the medicine, he wanted to spit it out.

It was yucky.

Why does altean medicine or any kind of medicine have to taste awful?

He felt a little bad that he was forcing Keith to drink this but it was to keep him from dying.

A little liquid death to keep death away was necessary.

Lance was mentally screaming in his head as he forced the liquid into Keith’s mouth.

‘Ew! Ew! Ew! Drink the disgusting medicine mullet!’

[ask-keith-kogane]

Keith: NO, GET AWAY FROM ME

*he tried getting out of the bed and away from you*

*Keith was fighting you off*

Keith: EW DONT KISS ME

*He was flailing around and trying to push your lips off his*

*he just spit the medicine right back in your mouth*