character inquiry station

Have you ever wanted to ask one of your favorite characters a question? Has there ever been something bothering you about one of your favorite books? That curiosity will soon come to an end. For a full list of characters that you can ask, go here.

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Any Adipose: What was your first thought?

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LEO DID U CATCH MAH COW

Just in case I didn't make that clear the first time, I can't catch a cow.

If you're strong and insane enough to throw cows, that's a dangerous combination already. Go uproot palm trees on a deserted island and I'll see you in a few decades.

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Lestrade do you like Molly? As in: are you going to ask her out? ^◡^

Molly Hooper. She's a sight in a little black dress...

I don't think she's ever given me a second thought or I'd have taken her out to dinner and a film.

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Hey Guinevere, what's it like being Queen, especially after Arthur's death?

Being queen—even saying the word sounds strange now—is awfully busy, and not at all how I thought it would be. I don’t think anyone could rule as well as they needed to—I’m not saying that Arthur wasn’t a good king. 

He was a wonderful king, and I can’t really do anything without thinking about what he had done for Camelot.

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Dear fred, did it hurt to die?

Two things wrong with that. Number one. I’m not dead—talking, breathing, digesting. Number two. I plan on dying in an exceptionally spectacular fashion that will be ludicrously painless.

Ladies and gents, that is all.

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Rose how is life with TenToo going?

It’s like a dream, almost. I look at him, and he’s the Doctor and he’s human. I wake up, sometimes, afraid—so afraid—that he isn’t real, that he’s gone off in his blue box to save worlds on the other side of the universe.

But he’s always there, and Mickey and Martha make such a lovely couple to have around, and everything’s so that sometimes I find myself crying.

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LEO WILL YOU MARRY ME

Hey, now. Don’t you think that’s a bit forward? I don’t know your name, I don’t know your favorite color or rose, I don’t know which side of the earth you came from. It’s probably a beautiful side.

I’m supposed to accidentally bump into you, take you out for a coffee every now and again, and after a few years, I might pop the question. But now, you’re just scary.

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To the Weasley twins, How are you guys such good prankers? Love, anonymous :)

It comes naturally; it’s all in the head, you know. Combine a disregard for authority with a good bit of ingenuity and someone who looks exactly like you, and you’ve got a perfect recipe for pranking.

But watch out for the parents. They’re a lot less tolerant of pranks than the average headmaster and bartender combined.

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Merlin have you met the Doctor?

If this doctor is famous, then I wouldn’t have met him—the Doctor, you said? Without a surname?

If he’s got a blue box and a strange article of clothing fastened around his neck, then I have met him and respect him greatly.

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ARTHUR WHY DID U WRECK MY OTP OMG -collapses into pile of sobs-

What are you talking about? I have never seen you before, and even if I did, I was certainly unaware of any “oh-tee-pee” that might have been in your possession.

Besides, the only things I have destroyed in the past week were several pairs of riding boots in a ill-favoured incident with a gigantic hound.

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To: Alex Kralie - Involving the events of Entry #80... How could you?! Jay used to be your friend, didn't he? How could you do that?!

I did what had to be done. Jay and the others should never have gotten involved. They don’t understand, and will never understand.

It can only be me.

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Voldemort can I has a hug? I shall pay you with my nose ;u;

Avada Kedavra.

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To either of the twins: did either of you ever have a 'thing' for Hermione? *wink wink*

You know, what they say—great minds think alike, eh? Only clots wouldn’t notice that the high-and-mighty boffin suddenly grew soft bits in all the right places, if you get my meaning.

Hermione’s quite fine, but I don’t think either of us really considered her with Ron’s endless prattling.

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DONNA WHY ARE YOU SOSOSOSOSO AMAZING

Oi! Don’t think even for one second that I’m one of them—the people who would bend over backwards if someone so much as gave them a smile out of place.

But in answer to your question—I do pride myself on a certain amount of common sense, and a good eye for furniture. That’s quite enough. Off with you!

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fitz how do u think about everyone talking to u and simmons as if u were the same person?

For starters, I think the same way as everyone else—with the organ in my head known as a brain.

It’s always “Fitzsimmons this” and “Fitzsimmons that” and “Where’s Fitz-bloody-Simmons? I need them to do something that I will neither understand nor appreciate.” Hooray.

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How was Tahiti, Coulson?

Tahiti was pleasant, thank you.

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Skulduggery, are you in love with that darling assistant of yours?

I don’t know if you noticed, but I’m a skeleton. If I had a heart, which I don’t, I’m still over four hundred years old. Which is, if you’re capable of doing math, over four hundred years older than my darling assistant.

But, if I were four hundred and thirty-three years younger, completely and impossibly normal, lived near her, and didn’t nurture a misplaced affection for the history teacher, then it might be a possibility.