O M E N

She drifted towards the bedroom on her way to have a bath, or take a n a p or start a w a r. Astoria Persephone Greengrass, a story worth telling.

[potterjr]

“It’s been two weeks. I think that’s enough time for everyone–” He paused to turn to the whispering pack of his ‘classmates’. “to figure out that I’m Harry Potter and not be shocked by it, right? I hear they’ve written an auto biography in this..time period, if you’re that interested in me then perhaps it might make more interesting to look at other than me – or my…family.”

[astcry-blog]

“Poor little famous boy.” Astoria didn’t mock him for cruelty— she mocked him because it was absolutely typical of Harry to sound narcissistic, even when he didn’t mean to. “What’s the matter, honey? The mean people just can’t get enough of their chosen one? Get over yourself, Potter.”

[narutoroleplayingmasterlist]

Send me a symbol to recieve one of the following from my muse

[hogwartsexpress]

Send ✆ for a morning text

Send ♔ for an angry voice mail

Send  ♠ for a prank call

Send ☎ for an emotional voice mail

Send ☏ for a vague voice mail Send ❖ for a confession(voicemail of text, specify.)

Send ⁇ for a worried text

Send ♣ for a text not meant for you

Send ✘ for a text that should have been sent

Send ✺for a saucy text

Send √ for an early morning text

Send ☠ for misguided advice

Send ☢ for a desperate text

Send ☼ for a promise

[wordsnquotes]

Fire in her eyes, ice in her voice.

Agatha Christie, The Mysterious Affair at Styles (via musingisms)

[astcry-blog]

[text] You should have told me you wanted me out of your life. (Theodore)

[text] i don’t[text] stop being such a drama queen theodore[text] im the queen around here

[astcry-blog]

[text] You’re so selfish.

[text] Selfish people live longer.

[giddyprew-blog]

[text]: they are also more likely to get murdered.

[astcry-blog]

[text]: darling im a killer, not a killée.

[astcry-blog]

[text] You want nothing to do with me, I get it.

[text] don’t take it personally[text] i don’t want anything to do with anyone

[astcry-blog]

pint of beer ( draco lmao )

The sound of her black heels were the only thing that could be heard from miles and miles as she paced viciously on the marble floor  — it echoed through the halls, just the way Astoria knew irritated Draco profoundly. It served him well, she thought, but it served her well too, because she wanted him to come to her almost as much as she wanted to piss him off. She had anger, alright. Mad anger.

A baby wasn’t part of her plans for the next decade, let alone the next year. I got a lot of work to do, honey. Draco would get a piece of her mind, because he sure as hell didn’t mind getting a piece of him inside her. Yet again, she never minded either, he was a superb fu—Her thoughts were interrupted when the menace himself entered the parlor. Although she had tried to antagonize him, the annoyed expression he sported aggravated her to no end: she was the one responsible for developing an entire human being inside of her. Astoria walked until she was face to face with him, even though he was probably a head taller than her. “What now?”

“Draco Lucius Malfoy, you bitch.” Astoria never had a problem with being taken seriously: she was feral enough to make up for her lack of height and probably give her a few more inches than necessary. “You impregnated me.” Draco probably didn’t know how terrified he should be when Astoria felt something kicking in. It wasn’t the baby, of course, but she did have some killer instincts to go with her perfect timing.

[astcry-blog]

[drunk text] AND I UNFOLLOWED YOU ON INSTAGRAM TOO, BITCH // [drunk text] You are my queen and my savior and I love you forever // [drunk text] You are the most beautiful girl I have ever known ( Pansy )

[drunk text] AND I UNFOLLOWED YOU ON INSTAGRAM TOO, BITCH

[text] you didn’t[text] you did[text] we’re done[text] and im gonna bitch about this to blaise

[drunk text] You are my queen and my savior and I love you forever

[text] im everyone’s queen[text] but can i get that on camera though?[text] our grandchildren will never believe me

[drunk text] You are the most beautiful girl I have ever known

[text] i know, pans[text] everyone knows

[astcry-blog]

[text] You’re so selfish.

[text] Selfish people live longer.

more texts for you bitches

ANGSTY TEXTS, BITCH

[text] You should have told me you wanted me out of your life. [text] I should have never let you back into my life. [text] Okay [muse’s name] what’s the deal, pretty sure this is you…listen if you want me to leave you alone, please just tell that. [text] Please don’t walk away. [text] Please don’t do this. [text] When are you going to realize I want nothing to do with you? [text] You want nothing to do with me, I get it. [text] I’m an idiot. You fooled me again. [text] When I think things are about to change … I’m always proven wrong. [text] I just want you to be happy. And you’ll be happier without me. [text] I just hate that someone could make me trust [him/her/them] the way that I did [text] The truth is I’m not over you. [text] The truth is I never really wanted to be with you. [text] I’m seeing someone else. [text] How the hell did you get my number, stalker? [text] You’re so selfish. [text] I just saw you leave with [her/him/them]. [text] FUCK YOU AND YOUR DUMB CUTE FACE

LOVING TEXTS, BITCH

[text] Did I tell you today that you’re the most adorable? Cause, yeah. [text] Be careful. [text] I’m only saying it because I love you. [text] I’m only saying it because I care about you. [text] Okay, I’m bringing coffee. [text] I’m thinking dinner and a movie later this week? [text] Let me take you out, please? [text] Let me make you dinner tonight. [text] I want you to be happy. [text] You’re always safe with me. [text] I can’t stop thinking about you. [text] I seriously don’t know what I’d do without you. [text] I know you may not feel like you are, but you are loved. And important. Please don’t forget that. [text] It was so good seeing you. [text] You don’t need this shit. [text] I’ll be there in five minutes. [text] Let me help, please? [text] You’re important to me. [text] Stop falling asleep in the bathtub. You’re going to drown and die and leave me and I’m not having that. [text] I would gladly watch Netflix and eat Thai with you any day. [text] I’d give up my phone charger AND the last piece of gum for you. That’s love. [text] Hey beautiful no judgment but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??

ANGRY TEXTS, BITCH

[text] If you don’t want me to bust your window, I suggest you answer the phone. Now. [text] To quote Mean Girls, you’re a fugly slut. [text] Are you SERIOUSLY bringing that up right now!? [text] Lose my number, asshole. [text] You’re so predictable and obnoxious. And it’s not only me who thinks so. [text] …The least you could do is answer, wtf. [text] You’re a piece of shit human being and an even worse friend. [text] This is YOUR FAULT. And you can’t even pretend like it isn’t, because you know it is. [text] Why couldn’t you just stay out of it? [text] Holy fucking shit, take a hint, asshole. [text] Go fuck yourself. [text] What the fucking hell is wrong with you? [text] You can take your stuff back as long as I don’t light it on fire first. [text] I have cramps and a migraine so you do NOT want to mess with me right now [text] Bye and have a very fuck you day

SEXY TEXTS, BITCH

[text] Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this. [text] Why are you so hot…like honestly, it’s not fair. [text] Yeah, you looked good in your [dress/shirt/pants] last night but really, they looked way better on my floor. [text] Come over. With condoms. [text] You should come over, clothing optional. [text] I feel like a nasty slut and I LOVE IT [text] Sorry I got drunk and texted you about my sex life [text] Sex on a rooftop - trashy or adventurous? [text] If you’re not at my apartment, shirtless, in five minutes, I will be personally offended. [text] I don’t think he likes that I’m always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together [text] It’ll be like The Notebook, except with way more of my penis. [text] I didn’t know that all of his brothers would be hot and musically inclined, too. That’s a dick move on behalf of biology. [text] I DON’T WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH. [text] So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking? [text] I just need some of your time and all of your body. [text] I am available for nakedness [text] I think about [him/her/them] when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love

DRUNK TEXTS, BITCH

[drunk text] So wat are you really over me no w [drunk text] AND I UNFOLLOWED YOU ON INSTAGRAM TOO, BITCH [drunk text] You are my queen and my savior and I love you forever [drunk text] You are the most beautiful girl I have ever known [drunk text] I’m eating macaroni and cheese on a slice of pizza and autocorrect just wrote that text for me pretty much, what’s your night like [drunk text] Listen up slut, you’re one hot piece of ass and if [he/she/they] doesn’t realize it, it’s their loss [drunk text] but what’s the point of a Disney sing off party if you’re not here. You have to be be the Pumbaa to my Timon [drunk text] Can you pls remind me tomorrow of how much of a fool I made myself tonight [drunk text] FUCK YOU YOU’RE GORGEOUS [drunk text] I think maybe you and me should like go out and eat pizza or something check yes or no [drunk text] Please don’t hate me I’m too tired and too dizzy to be hated [drunk text] I hate (him/her) but less when I’m drinking. Thanks, alcohol. [drunk text] Omf g you need to get over here now I think I’m dyin [drunk text] SWEEEEEEEET CAROLINE

[astcry-blog]

astocry | ratedroxy

[astcry-blog]

Drunk RP prompts

Red wine: Send a glass of red wine for a drunken kiss.

Rosé wine: Send a glass of rosé wine for a drunken confession.

White wine: Send a glass of white wine for a drunken story.

Shot of Whiskey: Send a shot of whiskey for my muse to mistake yours for someone they hate.

Shot of Vodka: Send a shot of vodka for my muse to mistake yours for someone they're friends with.

Shot of Tequila: Send a shot of tequila for my muse to mistake yours for someone they're in love with.

Pint of Beer: Send a pint of beer for my muse to get pregnant to yours after a night of blackout drinking-- or vice versa. Feel free to specify.

[bellahadiid]

[bel-hadid]

[bxywholived-blog]

@astcry  ❝Tell me you don’t love me.❞

[astcry-blog]

“I beg your pardon, is that supposed to be a difficult thing?”

[discntranced-blog]

“Stop being so petty, Astoria. I merely asked for you to leave me alone. Shouldn’t be that difficult.”

[astcry-blog]

“I’m petty? I fail to see the reason for that, especially since you are the one moping around more often than not. Grow a backbone and stop taking your frustrations out on others. I certainly won’t stand for that.”

[astcry-blog]

❝Oh, so aggressive! It’s turning me on.❞ @warxchild

[princeofvipers-blog]

His reputation often preceded him — to be recognized without knowing the speaker in return was hardly an anomaly, it was a simple consequence of Malfoy divinity — though, Mr. Malfoy was often a formality reserved for his father. To be mistaken for someone else, though, a man he had yet to even hear of, was an insult he had never been forced to weather. “Draco?” he echoed, his surprise accompanied by a haughty scoff. “Can’t say I’ve had the pleasure — if I have, he must not’ve made an impression.. then again, clearly neither did you. It’s clear you know who I am — now who, exactly, are you?”

[astcry-blog]

“You’re just being a gentleman. I haven’t grown so much since last summer.” Interesting. Astoria could guarantee Lucius Malfoy was still a looker, even in his forties, but this was just ridiculous. Is Lucius playing with Aunt Cissa’s glamours again? She resisted the urge to touch his face and see.   — The witch did have to admit the object of her fascination was father, not son. At that moment, however, he appeared to be truly confused. “What are you talking about, Mr. Malfoy? Did anyone hex you? Is Aunt Cissa here?” Astoria asked. The castle was so messy it was possible for him to get accidentally confunded.