There were few people that Helena could truly trust anymore, but Rabastan was at the top of her list. He’d been there for her through the election process and afterwards as well. Helena was able to find a moment of calm in these moments, and she appreciated that while he was able to make her look regal that she could take a moment to just breathe. Knowing that she wasn’t alone in this was comforting, and he was the only person she’d been able to be open with thus far. How far their friendship had grown in the last few months was astounding to some degree. Giving a small laugh she grinned, “I hope she can as well, though depending on who it is she might just be content to let you do it” she grinned.
“I don’t know what I’d do without you, Bas,” she hummed. If she wasn’t currently working against his brother’s policies they could be more public with friendship, which his involvement in her decisions. However, it wasn’t safe for either of them, so their friendship stayed minimal in the public eye. It was depressing to some degree. Helena had a big heart, she always had, but it beat harder for certain people. Her brother, Bas, Cissa, Reg - they were the people that she’d do anything to protect. She smiled as he finished her makeup and she looked forward to seeing the finished product. “I hope so. I really do. We deserve better than this” Helena murmured. There was a darkness to it, and she knew that there were some that wouldn’t end up with such a lovely fate, but she hoped beyond hope that Bas, and to some degree herself, did.
For a moment, she allowed his touch to comfort her. It wasn’t often anymore that physical affection brought her peace, but from the right people it was soothing. Nodding she answered softly, “It does; I don’t feel so much like a monster if you’d have made the same choice.” At least she wasn’t alone in her decision. Loosing her grip she started to pull out of the hug some, “You’re not a monster, Bas. I’ve met monsters, and you certain aren’t one,” Helena answered honestly. “Do you want some tea? I think we still have a bit of time to kill before we’re expected,” Helena offered.
What she said to him left him a little stunned but perhaps it shouldn’t. Deep down he knew he was a good person, one who had done bad things, one who felt lost. But he was good and he wanted to be better, to be his best. If only his circumstances were different, if only he were brave enough to lose his family in the process of finding himself. Rabastan had to remind himself that he and Helena were not simply coworkers, they were friends now and ones who understood and respected one another. He had not expected this to become what it was but he was glad it had. Helena was smart, she was strong and she was compassionate without being too sympathetic. Their friendship was one that only came along every so often and not for the first time he lamented missing so many years of his own life. “Yeah, you’ve become pretty important to me too Helena and not just because you’re undersecretary now.”
Bas looked over his work, satisfied she was ready to get dressed. “Hope, I think as long as we still have that we know---it’ll be okay, someday.” If he ever lost hope he’d try to tell her, maybe that would be the day he’d run. There had been dozens of times he considered it, running away, ever since he was fifteen. But the last four years hadn’t been so imprisoned, though freedom was still something he stole in small doses.
He felt her pulling away and immediately let her go, Rabastan hated being touched and yet, when it came from the right people, he craved it. “I’m glad to help.” He let himself chuckle and wondered how long it had been since he’d heard his own laughter, real laughter. He wanted to be reassured by that but she didn’t know and to some degree neither did he, just what kind of monster he was. “I wish I could explain it to you but now is not the time for such a thing. And tea would be great.”
