I've received so many messages of kindness, love and concern over my absence and I'd like to give you an update.
I haven't been feeling drawn to this space or writing lately.
At first I thought I needed some space and change post-degree but I've recently returned from vacation feeling refreshed, happy and energised and realised this will be more than a little break. I'm being drawn to different joys in my life right now; I don't know when/if I will be "back" in the capacity I was before.
I'm not deleting my account or vanishing for good. I'm keeping up with the occasional fic and will be popping in every so often. You'll just — as you have been for months — be seeing a lot less of me. I won't be answering all the messages in my ask box, but I've read and appreciate them 💜
Every single one of you is so amazing! Keep shining and spreading sprinkles in my absence ✨ Love you!
“Just saying, Evans,” he then said, lowering his voice slightly, “if you ever want to truly have a good time…”
She snorted now, hoping that this would compensate for the heat that rushed to her cheeks. “Oh, please,” she replied, “I’m not yet that desperate.”
(Oh, God, she was.)
A Jily Neighbours with Benefits AU
Read the first two chapters of I Wake With Your Memory Over Me (That's A Real Fuckin' Legacy) HERE!
Since I'm not going to manage to finish the chapter before I go on vacation, rather than gif hints, I've decided to post the opening scene of the chapter beneath the cut. Surprise?
Private WhatsApp Chat
Resumed: Monday 28th March, 2022, 00:00
Members: Lily Evans, James Potter
================================
Lily Evans: You're still out, right? For the rest of the day?
James Potter: yeah
we got out of the first room early, so
i say we, sirius did most of the heavy lifting because i've been completely out of it
just waiting for the next one to be ready
they said it would take about 25 minutes
Lily Evans: So I suppose I don't have much time to talk to you?
James Potter: that seems to be today's recurring theme
Lily Evans: I KNOW
And I'd wanted SO much to have a properly long conversation with you earlier.
James Potter: so did i, but it's alright
hey, lily?
Lily Evans: Yeah?
James Potter: are we okay?
Lily Evans: What?
James Potter: it's just that i feel like we might not be, so i wanted to check
Lily Evans: Wait, what?
Why wouldn't we be okay?
James Potter: because of what happened earlier
Lily Evans: You're upset about that?
James Potter: no, but
i mean, sort of
not because it wasn't the best thing that's ever happened to me, because it was
but we had an agreement, you made it really clear that you had this boundary in place and that we shouldn't move too fast, except then we did, and i'm worried that i've made you do something that you weren't ready for
which i'm so sorry about, if i have
Lily Evans: Have you been worrying about this since we hung up?
James Potter: yeah
well
not initially because i was still, y'know
heaven
Lily Evans: Right
James Potter: but then i started to really think about what it meant and i feel like i got carried away and cocked up, and i owe you an apology
Lily Evans: No you don't!
James Potter: but i do though, we said we weren't going to do this and now we have because i brought up your friend's brother and asked you to tell me you wanted me when i could have not done those things
so i don't want you to feel like this is something you have to keep up just for my sake
if you need to take a few steps back now, please tell me and we can do that
Lily Evans: JAMES
James Potter: i just don't want to lose you, i don't want to fuck this up
Lily Evans: You're NOT going to lose me, okay??
And I really need you to know that I don't want to lose you, either.
Yes, I freaked out earlier when you brought up Aaron because I'd been so sure that you KNEW there wasn't a chance I'd be interested in somebody else and then suddenly it dawned on me that things from your end must have seemed more one-sided than they were, so I told you all of that stuff in a rush, but if the trains hadn't been cancelled and I hadn't gotten home so late I would have said it all anyway, James. I would have said it earlier.
Only I'd have said it in the way I'd planned to last night, and it would have made me sound a lot less like a maniac.
So PLEASE, don't worry about me and my boundaries right now, because I feel really good about what happened.
James Potter: you'd planned to say that stuff today?
Lily Evans: Yes.
James Potter: because of my birthday??
Lily Evans: Not because it was your birthday, obviously it BEING your birthday made it more of an ideal time, but no.
I wanted to say it to you because honestly, James, I think we should just go for it.
James Potter: what do you mean?
Lily Evans: I mean IT
As in you and me.
As in us.
I think we should actually BE an us.
James Potter: you mean
be a couple?
Lily Evans: Yes, a couple. Let's be a couple. That's what I want.
Is that what you want?
James Potter: lily
are you sure?
are you REALLY sure?
Lily Evans: Yes, I'm sure.
James Potter: because i don't want you to rush into anything you're not ready for
i meant it when i said i was happy to wait
Lily Evans: I know, and I appreciate you so much for that but I promise you, I'm ready. I'm there. I am.
I am mad about you, I want us to be together, and I'm SO sick of only being able to half-acknowledge it when all I want to do every minute of every day is let you know it.
I said I was frightened and I wasn't lying, but I'm also sick of letting my life be dictated by a bunch of fears and insecurities that aren't going to go away if I wait patiently for them to leave. I have to actually DO something to confront them.
So I want us to go for it. I can't be just friends anymore.
James Potter: right
Lily Evans: Unless this isn't sounding good to you and I've completely misread the situation?
James Potter: GOD NO
LILY
you haven't misread AT ALL
i'm just
stunned
Lily Evans: Oh. Okay.
James Potter: because i wasn't expecting this
i was expecting the opposite after this morning, honestly
i thought i'd fucked up somehow
i'd thought you were going to want to take a step back
Lily Evans: No, I don't, I really don't, I'm so tired of taking steps back, James. I want to move forward.
I want to move forward with you, because I trust you and I know how much you care about me, and I care SO much about you, and I think we could be really great together, you know?
I think we could make each other really happy.
James Potter: lily we ARE great together
Lily Evans: WE ARE
James Potter: I KNOW
Lily Evans: WE ALWAYS HAVE BEEN
James Potter: from day one
i've always said it
i mean, not to you, i was terrified to say it to you
but remus and sirius have heard a LOT about it
Lily Evans: Well, I want you to say it to me now, please.
Because, you know, if there's a full James Potter experience that I've been missing out on while we've been just friends for the past year and a bit, I want in as soon as possible.
James Potter: oh, there's an experience
Lily Evans: I thought so.
James Potter: very exclusive though
Lily Evans: I should bloody well hope it is, I'm not sharing you with anyone else.
James Potter: there's a single entrant limit, what do you take me for?
Lily Evans: There's not a dress code, is there?
James Potter: dress code is wear whatever you want or wear nothing
Lily Evans: And I can alternate between both?
James Potter: don't let my personal preferences dissuade you from putting on clothes
Lily Evans: I kind of have to if I want to keep my job, right?
James Potter: right
so
we're together then?
properly together?
you and me?
Lily Evans: That's what I want, more than anything.
I mean that.
So if that's what you want too, then yes. Please.
James Potter: OF COURSE THAT'S WHAT I WANT
Lily Evans: Unless you'd rather not share our anniversary with your birthday?? I don't know how you feel about that.
Although it is after midnight HERE.
James Potter: you're talking about anniversaries
you're talking about OUR anniversary
lily
LILY
Lily Evans: I mean, yeah?
I just assumed.
Are you okay with that?
James Potter: AM I OKAY WITH IT
LILY
LILY EVANS
Lily Evans: ????
James Potter: i'm sitting here in a waiting room trying to look like i'm not having a heart attack while you tell me that all my dreams are coming true and you're wondering if i'm OKAY with it?
Lily Evans: You have dreams that are unrelated to me!
James Potter: ALL MY DREAMS, LILY
i can't believe this is happening
this isn't real
i'm going to wake up any second, aren't i? i passed out on my bed or something. this can't be real
it can't be
you're SURE?
Lily Evans: YES I'M SURE
James Potter: you're not worried about rushing into anything??
Lily Evans: No, honestly, I've been thinking about that, and would it even BE rushing into anything when you're still travelling until July and we'll have already been together for a solid three months, long distance, by the time you get back?
James Potter: right
yeah
so you're cool with that? with the distance?
Lily Evans: Yes, of course, we've been apart this whole time and it hasn't done a thing to get in the way of us becoming as close as we have.
And I trust you. I trust you SO much.
I just don't want to keep holding things back.
James Potter: you mean everything to me, lil
everything
in the world
you're it for me, you always have been
if i tell you that i would do anything for you, i'm not exaggerating, because i really really would
i'm sorry if that's too much, it's true though, that's how i feel
Lily Evans: It's not. It's not too much at all, I feel the exact same way.
You're it for me too. You really are.
James Potter: and i'm going to do everything in my power to make you happy, alright?
i promise
i promise that i'm never going to take you for granted
for fuck's SAKE they want us in the room now
i literally just went and hid in the toilet twenty seconds ago but now sirius is banging on the door
one sec, i'm going to tell them that something's come up and i can't do it
Lily Evans: No, it's okay!
Do it, it's fine!
Sirius has a bunch of genuinely cool plans for your birthday that you deserve to enjoy and I really need to go to bed anyway, hell week starts in the morning and I'm going to need SOME sleep to get through it.
James Potter: lily i will tell everyone in this building to fuck off right now if you want me to, it's fine
Lily Evans: No really, don't!
Last night I was convinced that I wanted to have this perfect, planned, lengthy conversation about us, but honestly it really doesn't matter how it happened, I'm just so happy that it did.
James Potter: i'm crazy about you, do you know that?
Lily Evans: I'm crazy about you!
You're all I bloody think about!
James Potter: YOU'RE ALL I THINK ABOUT TOO
HENCE THE CAPS
FOR EMPHASIS
Lily Evans: Okay so GO HAVE FUN and I'm going to go to bed and try to sleep and I'll text you in the morning and we'll sort out a time to talk PROPERLY and figure all this out, okay?
James Potter: okay
okay
okay
jesus, my heart's beating so fast i might collapse
Lily Evans: Lol mine too, I'm going to need the blue Nytol to sleep tonight.
James Potter: i'm going to need a mallet to the head
Lily Evans: Tire yourself out having THE BEST time tonight and you'll be alright.
Now get out of the loo and escape the room, I adore you.
James Potter: i adore you too, you goddess of a woman
Lily Evans: Okay I'm GOING TO BED or else you're never going to leave that bathroom and I'm going to be a zombie with eye bags at work tomorrow.
James Potter: you could not sleep for a week and still be beautiful
Lily Evans: STOP
James Potter: NO I WILL NOT STOP, IT'S LITERALLY MY JOB TO TELL YOU THAT NOW
Lily Evans: OKAY DON'T STOP BUT LEAVE THE LOO, OKAY?
24. Which scene/theme was the inspiration for Call it what you want? As I am always a sucker for rivals-to-lovers, secret mutual pining trope so this fic so far is one of my favorite Jily fic of all time.
Thank you so much! 😍
Actually, it was @athenasparrow who made this fic possible because of her smut fairy sprinkling. It was also the fic that cemented our friendship, which makes this one of my favourites!
Athena asked for smut, and because we both love Taylor, “Call It What You Want” became the title of the fic and the prologue wrote itself. I just reread the opening scene and I cannot believe I wrote them like this:
Ten minutes later, her heels clicked against the floor as they made their way over to the elevators, side by side – he on his phone, scrolling mindlessly, she pretending not to feel the cum slowly dripping out of her, soak her panties.
“Any plans for the weekend?” she asked him, flipping her hair over her shoulder as she pushed the elevator button. An attempt at cordiality, at normalcy perhaps after just fucking each other’s brains out.
He snorted, not even bothering to look up from his phone. “I’m going to spend all of it plotting your downfall, Evans. That promotion is mine.”
Her nostrils flared, her lips pursed. Dick, she thought.
Jily: the heating charms have gone haywire...Lily is very cold and James runs hot 🔥
#sharethatbed
Heads up. For plot purposes, this is going to be an AU where they don't get together seventh year.
Lily was drying the clothes on their bodies as James tried to get a fire going in the fireplace. Dumbledore's safe houses were very secure, just not so warm sometimes. They'd just diverted Death Eaters who were trying to burn down a Muggle town, and were now hiding until it was safe to go home. Which wouldn't likely be until morning. Damn this damp wood.
"D-did you get it g-going?" Lily asked through chattering teeth.
"Not yet," James muttered. Light, he thought. Come on.
"Damn it," she breathed. "I'm shaking too much to do a warming charm."
James nodded toward the bed, the only one in this one room shack. "Go cover up. I'll get this started."
And finally the fire lit up. Thank fuck.
Lily was already sitting cross legged on the bed with the covers pulled up to her chin. There wasn't even a couch for him to kip on. Damn Dumbledore. James rocked one of the bedside tables out. It'd no doubt make a lumpy couch, but it'd do for tonight.
"What are you doing?" Lily asked.
"I'm going to transfigure this into a couch," James said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
"Don't be ridiculous," she snapped. "We're both adults. We can share the bed. Besides, it'll be warmer that way."
James was not going to get any sleep tonight because someone up above hated him so much that they were going to make him share a bed with the girl who he'd had a crush on since he was fifteen-years-old. Lily's green eyes were shining through the firelight, and he swore she'd never looked prettier. Though he'd probably find another moment tomorrow that would outshine this one.
"You don't have to-"
Lily scoffed. "James, don't be silly."
Judging from her determined expression, she was not going to let this go. One night. All he had do was survive one night. As he sat on the edge of the bed, he untied the laces of his boots and toed them off. Lily had already scooted over to make room for him, was laying facing him, her hair haloed around her like a damn angel. This was going to be burned into his mind forever.
"Do you think they'll find us?" she whispered, a shiver running up her spine.
"In this old thing?" he said as he scrambled under the covers to face her. "Doubtful." He dropped his glasses onto the nightstand behind him as the fire crackled loudly.
Lily shivered. "Why are you so warm?"
James shrugged. "I don't know. Remus says I run hot." In fact, he'd shoved James off him multiple times when all four of them had fallen asleep in the same bed at the Potter home. His exact words were 'a fucking furnace,' if James remembered correctly.
Lily muttered something under her breath that James couldn't hear, then she rolled over and slid back towards him. Eyes wide, James dropped his hand to her hip, trying to keep several inches of space between the two of them.
"What are you doing, Evans?" he hissed into the dark.
"I'm freezing," she whined. Then she pressed her ice cold feet into his calves.
"Holy fuck," he muttered, but he let her slide back into him. He had to. He wasn't about to let her freeze. With her back pressed against his chest and her hair right under his nose, the smell of strawberries drifted up to him. Desperately, he shifted his hips away from her, praying that she wouldn't notice anything.
Only she kept moving. Wiggling this way and that to get comfortable, rotating her feet to get them warmed up, shivers racking her whole spine causing her to shift against him. James felt like he was burning from the inside out. Finally, he pressed his hand hard into her hip to still her.
"Evans, what-"
"Are you poking me?" she demanded.
James snapped his hips away from her, his cheeks on fire. He had one job when he climbed in this bed, and he'd failed miserably at it.
"It's a natural reaction," he muttered through clinched teeth.
"A natural reaction?"
"Yes. Because you keep squirming around."
Lily snorted, and James knew she didn't believe him. "So, if I was Sirius, you'd be having the same natural reaction?" She didn't give him time to answer as she rolled onto her back and propped herself up on her elbows. James could see that her green eyes had gotten darker and her mouth was dropped open in disbelief. Why was she always so fucking beautiful? "Well?"
"No," James breathed against her lips, then her fingers were in his hair and his hands were clutching her waist like she was a buoy in a gale. Rolling on top of her, he slid his hand under her sweatshirt, humming at the warmth he found there. Her name was symphony on his lips as he kissed the column of her throat.
Her hands made quick work of his belt, and were sliding inside his pants.
"Holy fuck," he swore.
"Quick to shoot off, are we?" she breathed as her finger swept over his head.
"If you keep doing that, yeah," he muttered swatting her hands away.
She pouted for a moment before shrieking as he pushed her shirt up.
"Don't do that," she said, pushing it back down. "It's fucking cold." James grinned against her neck. "If you say something stupid, like 'I'll keep you warm,' I'll smack you."
Instead, he unfastened her jeans and slid them down her legs along with her knickers. His hand found her center and he swore under his breathe.
"How long have you-"
"Since you got in bed."
Shit.
James hadn't dared to dream that she'd want him back, hadn't wanted to give himself false hope. Remus always shook his head at the pining looks he sent Lily when her back was turned, and Sirius told to grow some balls and talk to her like an adult. But he was barely capable of forming words around her most of the time, let alone talking about how he felt about her.
"Lily," he muttered against her neck.
The redhead simply grabbed his cock and circled it around her entrance.
"Are you sure?" he whispered.
"Yes," she breathed against his neck like she'd always been certain, like this was always meant to happen.
James slid inside her with a hiss, muffling his gasps against her neck.
"James," she whined, and James swore he was going to loose it. She was different than anyone he'd been with. He'd never cared this much, never wanted something so much that he felt like his heart was going to burst from his chest and take flight. As she gasped under him, James thought Lily might feel the same way. His slid over her right breast, and he swore he could feel her heart beating through her chest, matching rhythm with his own.
They unraveled together, like stars dying at the same time. Lily's nails dug into his back where she'd slipped her hand under his shirt, and his teeth sunk into her neck. As they both came down, her fingers stroked through his hair, and James shuddered unable to hide his grin any longer.
"Oh, get off," she said shoving at his chest.
James simply rolled onto his side and tugged her close. "Since I got in bed, eh?"
"Oh, shut up," she muttered, tugging her underwear back up her legs. "I should never have told you that. "
"I'm never going to let you forget it," James said as he nuzzled her neck.
Transfiguration class outside was the stupidest idea that James had ever heard of, especially in the dead of winter. McGonagall had finally gone mad, it seemed. Even if they were transfiguring live plants. Lily was next to him rubbing her hands together like mad to keep warm.
"How much longer do you think we'll be out here?" she said through chattering teeth.
He and Lily had both taken their turns, but they still had at least a dozen students to go through, and not all of them were geniuses at Transfiguration like he was, so they had to get feedback and corrections. James guessed they'd be out here until the end of class time.
"Fuck I know," James muttered darkly.
Even the heating charms were no use in this blinding wind. If he were playing Quidditch. it would have been different, but he was just standing here waiting for everyone else to hurry the fuck up.
"I'm freezing," Lily said, her breath turning into fog in front of her face. The bottoms of his glasses were starting to become blurry with the condensation from his own breath.
"Here," James said, pulling the side of his jacket open so she could be a little warmer. Lily took the opportunity to slide her arms around him, her mitten-covered fingers clutching at the sweater he was wearing. Pressing her face into his chest, she shuddered against the cold, and James tried to keep his breathing relatively normal.
Friends could huddle together against the cold. There was no reason for him to make this out to be more than it was. He could be normal about this.
"Are you two cuddling?" Sirius called as he and Remus finished up their turn.
But his friends could not.
Lily spun around and shoved Sirius into the snow as soon as he got close enough. Severed him right. Then she was right back against his chest, and James couldn't breath.
"I'm cold," she said as if that were explanation enough.
James hoped his eyes conveyed enough; shut up, shut up, shut up. Remus, bless him, didn't comment, just raised his eyebrows in that smug way of his, while Sirius brushed snow off his coat.
I'm just very selfish 😈 And also feeling rebellious in the face of people attacking AO3 because they think NSFW is bad 🙄
Jily: somebody catches somebody (pick your poison: changing, wanking, looking at something sexual....muggle au where Lily is reading erotica)😉
😘😘😘
'. . . moving his hand down to her-'
Lily slammed her book shut and James and Sirius came up laughing to her table. She was sure she was red in the face, and it was obvious what she'd been reading. Only both boys continued to chat about their Transfiguration project.
"What's wrong with you, Evans?" Sirius asked, and Lily realized she'd been staring.
"Nothing," Lily snapped as she flipped open her Potions book. She didn't want to talk to them, didn't want to explain that she hadn't been studying for her exams at all. If it were anyone other than these two, she might have have been able to pretend she wasn't reading filth just for the sake of reading it.
The boys shared a look, but didn't comment further.
"Where's Remus?" she asked for lack of better conversation. She couldn't focus right now anyway.
James slid his robe off and started to roll up his sleeves revealing dark skin and muscles honed from years of Quidditch. "He and Pete are grabbing food. Don't tell Madam Pince. Figured if we were back in the library far enough-"
"Will you stop that?" she snapped.
"What?" he asked, his brows furrowing in confusion. It really wasn't James' fault that she was being unreasonable. Her stupid, stupid hormones had decided that James was attractive for some reason or another. Meanwhile, her brain took pleasure in reminding her that they were never going to happen. Why was being sixteen so difficult?
"Nevermind," she muttered, realizing how stupid she was being.
He and Sirius shared another look.
Quietly, the boys continued their conversation, and Lily pretended she was memorizing whatever potion was on the page she'd flipped to, but she couldn't concentrate on anything other than the dip in James' voice when he was being sarcastic or the way he threw his head back when he laughed. Vaguely, she was aware of James asking to borrow her Charms book, but she was too focused on the messiness of his hair, wondering what it would look like in the morning.
"What are you doing?!" Lily shrieked as James tried to pick up her novel sat under her Potions book.
"I was just-"
"Don't touch my stuff, James Potter," she hissed as she dumped her books into bag and stormed out of the library.
@wearingaberetinparis it's keeping me up at night. Please hurry 😂
***
“Where have you been?” James thunders.
“Getting ingredients,” Lily responds as casually as her breathless lungs allowed. She heaves a gulp of air as she sets the herbs on the old wooden benchtop of the abandoned cottage, her eyes sliding to the bandage adorning Sirius’ shoulder.
James’ hazel eyes blaze so furiously that Lily wonders if his magic might pour out of him until her hard-won herbs are no more than smoking ash. “Where did you get these?” The knot in his jaw works overtime, his body strung so tight he’s almost unrecognizable from the lanky teenager who sauntered the Halls of Hogwarts a decade earlier.
Lily busies herself, aimlessly opening the dusty timber drawers in the guise of looking for a knife she she knows damn well is tucked away at the end of the counter.
“Tell me you didn’t.” His voice is barely the hiss of a killing curse, but its potency is equally deadly. “Not alone.”
Lily bends her knees to open a lower cupboard so her eye roll is hidden from James’ fury. “Of course not!” Lily says brightly — unable to stop her tongue from provoking his outrage further — “Hermes came with me.” Her owl is (wisely) nowhere in sight.
Lily rises in time to catch Remus’ furrowed brow as he winces into his hand before her attention is pulled to the apoplectic hazel-eyed wizard across from her. His hands press so firmly into the counter, it is a wonder it doesn’t crumble under the frenzy of his ferocity. The veins of his forearms bulge as his magic escapes his pores to cling to his body in a pulsing rage. The thump thump of his carotid beats wildly at his neck.
“Why didn’t you take one of us with you?” Sirius asks with far less bite than his brother.
“You were busy,” Lily nods at his shoulder, “and he would have…” Lily trails off as she imagines the lengths James may have gone to if he’d known she was sneaking in to the Death Eater encampment they’d been tailing. Would he have dulled her? Stunned her? Physically pinned her to the ground? Her eyes finish their trail up his tense arms to the solidness of his chest and her body flushes burning hot as images of him pressed over her infiltrates her mind. “...he would’ve said no,” she offers half-heartedly, distracted as she is by the thought of him.
“Damn right I would have said no!” The wood of the counter stands no chance against the might of James’ magic as it surges with his anger: large caverns run in a spiderweb from his clenched fist.
Lily inhales sharply, stumbling back in surprise; James never loses control of his magic. He’s been upset plenty of times; she’s been on the end of his sharp tongue and overprotective passion more than once. But this? His eyes hold no sparkle; the desolate torment of them strikes her still as stone. When he clocks her stumble, he crumbles in agony, twitching in a full-body flinch as the fight abruptly leaves him.
“I’m sorry.” It was whispers, shoulders slumped and head low. Before Lily has a chance to open her mouth, he’s out the door, the cool breeze from his exit does nothing to awaken her from where she frozen.
“I’ll go,” Sirius murmurs after a moment of silence.
“No. Me.” Blood rushes back into her limbs as they move under her. “Dice these, will you Remus?” She’s gone before either can protest, her eyes finding him hunched under the large tree they’d strung their wards from. With each step, the rough pain of his ragged breathing pierces deeper in her chest until Lily can sink onto her knees in front of him.
“You didn’t frighten me, I was just surprised,” Lily gently pulls his hands from his face, wiping the wetness on his cheeks.
“I promise,” she reiterates when his look remains painfully dubious. “We’ve been through ten years of fighting James Potter and if there’s one thing I would stake my life on, it’s that you’d never hurt me.” The loosening of his shoulders tells her that he believes her, but his gaze remained on the ground.
Lily reaches for his hand, running her fingertips over the callouses born from combat. She squeezes once and waits.
“I can’t lose you, I —” his voice breaks.
“You would have done it,” Lily reminds him gently. “Your life isn’t less important than mine.” The thought of losing him is unbearable.
James shakes head in what Lily knows to be vehement disagreement, but his indignance overcomes his pain and his eyes shoot to hers. They both freeze. Moments of the last decade bleed together in a fragile could he? As the emotion flowed from his eyes to hers, his magic runs wild – less violent than minutes earlier, but no less passionate — dancing over her skin until her own escapes to meet him. His fingers tighten on her while his magic leaves her breathless as it transforms from pain to hope as he stares back at what she thinks might be a mirror of his emotions. No mask. No pretend. It’s all there now.
“Lily?” he whispers. Suddenly, she just knows.
She moves first, letting her lips melt into the warmth of his. There’s a moment of stillness before a mad laugh escapes James’ lips, his breath dancing on her skin before firm hands hook behind her knees, yanking her to press fully against him. As far as first kisses go, she’s never had one that feels so much like home. The taste of him is relief; his body her solace; and Lily sinks willingly into both.
Bahahahah LOLLL omg guys you can tell I wrote that tired. I see no less than 15 typos, writing in multiple tenses, missing pronouns etc 😆 And forgot to tag you @jilymicrofics ooooopsieeee! All around unhinged 😂
Everyone please go read Spark of The Everflame and the rest of the series right now! It's SO GOOD 😍
@wearingaberetinparis it's keeping me up at night. Please hurry 😂
***
“Where have you been?” James thunders.
“Getting ingredients,” Lily responds as casually as her breathless lungs allowed. She heaves a gulp of air as she sets the herbs on the old wooden benchtop of the abandoned cottage, her eyes sliding to the bandage adorning Sirius’ shoulder.
James’ hazel eyes blaze so furiously that Lily wonders if his magic might pour out of him until her hard-won herbs are no more than smoking ash. “Where did you get these?” The knot in his jaw works overtime, his body strung so tight he’s almost unrecognizable from the lanky teenager who sauntered the Halls of Hogwarts a decade earlier.
Lily busies herself, aimlessly opening the dusty timber drawers in the guise of looking for a knife she she knows damn well is tucked away at the end of the counter.
“Tell me you didn’t.” His voice is barely the hiss of a killing curse, but its potency is equally deadly. “Not alone.”
Lily bends her knees to open a lower cupboard so her eye roll is hidden from James’ fury. “Of course not!” Lily says brightly — unable to stop her tongue from provoking his outrage further — “Hermes came with me.” Her owl is (wisely) nowhere in sight.
Lily rises in time to catch Remus’ furrowed brow as he winces into his hand before her attention is pulled to the apoplectic hazel-eyed wizard across from her. His hands press so firmly into the counter, it is a wonder it doesn’t crumble under the frenzy of his ferocity. The veins of his forearms bulge as his magic escapes his pores to cling to his body in a pulsing rage. The thump thump of his carotid beats wildly at his neck.
“Why didn’t you take one of us with you?” Sirius asks with far less bite than his brother.
“You were busy,” Lily nods at his shoulder, “and he would have…” Lily trails off as she imagines the lengths James may have gone to if he’d known she was sneaking in to the Death Eater encampment they’d been tailing. Would he have dulled her? Stunned her? Physically pinned her to the ground? Her eyes finish their trail up his tense arms to the solidness of his chest and her body flushes burning hot as images of him pressed over her infiltrates her mind. “...he would’ve said no,” she offers half-heartedly, distracted as she is by the thought of him.
“Damn right I would have said no!” The wood of the counter stands no chance against the might of James’ magic as it surges with his anger: large caverns run in a spiderweb from his clenched fist.
Lily inhales sharply, stumbling back in surprise; James never loses control of his magic. He’s been upset plenty of times; she’s been on the end of his sharp tongue and overprotective passion more than once. But this? His eyes hold no sparkle; the desolate torment of them strikes her still as stone. When he clocks her stumble, he crumbles in agony, twitching in a full-body flinch as the fight abruptly leaves him.
“I’m sorry.” It was whispers, shoulders slumped and head low. Before Lily has a chance to open her mouth, he’s out the door, the cool breeze from his exit does nothing to awaken her from where she frozen.
“I’ll go,” Sirius murmurs after a moment of silence.
“No. Me.” Blood rushes back into her limbs as they move under her. “Dice these, will you Remus?” She’s gone before either can protest, her eyes finding him hunched under the large tree they’d strung their wards from. With each step, the rough pain of his ragged breathing pierces deeper in her chest until Lily can sink onto her knees in front of him.
“You didn’t frighten me, I was just surprised,” Lily gently pulls his hands from his face, wiping the wetness on his cheeks.
“I promise,” she reiterates when his look remains painfully dubious. “We’ve been through ten years of fighting James Potter and if there’s one thing I would stake my life on, it’s that you’d never hurt me.” The loosening of his shoulders tells her that he believes her, but his gaze remained on the ground.
Lily reaches for his hand, running her fingertips over the callouses born from combat. She squeezes once and waits.
“I can’t lose you, I —” his voice breaks.
“You would have done it,” Lily reminds him gently. “Your life isn’t less important than mine.” The thought of losing him is unbearable.
James shakes head in what Lily knows to be vehement disagreement, but his indignance overcomes his pain and his eyes shoot to hers. They both freeze. Moments of the last decade bleed together in a fragile could he? As the emotion flowed from his eyes to hers, his magic runs wild – less violent than minutes earlier, but no less passionate — dancing over her skin until her own escapes to meet him. His fingers tighten on her while his magic leaves her breathless as it transforms from pain to hope as he stares back at what she thinks might be a mirror of his emotions. No mask. No pretend. It’s all there now.
“Lily?” he whispers. Suddenly, she just knows.
She moves first, letting her lips melt into the warmth of his. There’s a moment of stillness before a mad laugh escapes James’ lips, his breath dancing on her skin before firm hands hook behind her knees, yanking her to press fully against him. As far as first kisses go, she’s never had one that feels so much like home. The taste of him is relief; his body her solace; and Lily sinks willingly into both.
A House Is Not A Home (But He Can Build Her One) - Chapter 2 / 13
“Oh, well,” she sighed, “I’m not embarrassed –” (she was) “– so you might as well know. There’s not much of a philosophical reason I chose to build myself a house there. Sure, I adore the ocean and I love the beach,” she noticed that she was fidgeting with the hem of her skirt, her palms slightly sweaty now, “but in all honesty, I am asking you to build me a revenge house.”
James Potter blinked at her from behind his glasses, then he let out a surprised chuckle, shaking his head as if trying to process her words. “A revenge house?” he repeated. “Excuse me, I’ve never quite heard of the term before –”
A Jily Modern AU in which James builds Lily a home.
It is very nearly Monday where I am and it's definitely Monday where @athenasparrow is. Read Chapter Two HERE!
I Spy, I Spy With My Little Eye - A Jily as MI6 Spies AU
Surprise! Here's my new oneshot named I Spy, I Spy With My Little Eye. I hope you will enjoy it. Sorry if the editing is sloppy, I just wanted to hit post.
Potter. James Potter. It sounds like a joke. It most certainly isn’t.
A Jily MI6 Spies AU in which James Potter and Lily Evans attempt to take down Tom Riddle.
I hope you will enjoy the presence of Benjy, the cat. Final scene was inspired by @athenasparrow's cats.
James Potter always knew he wanted to build a family, he just hadn’t found the right person to build it with - yet. Freezing his sperm at Gringotts Sperm Bank was a no-brainer really. He’d have children when he found the right person, and now he had an insurance policy. Then Lily Evans walked into his place of work with her son - the spitting image of him.
magic in the tides || Read on ao3 || 3.5K words
A restless waves rise and fall oneshot
Roughly a month after evading the Royal Navy, James and Lily steal away from the rest of the crew one night to experience the sea's majesty up close. Away from the others and under the comfort of night, Lily struggles with a confession that's equal parts terrifying and thrilling.
Wordlessly, she sidles up beside him against the railing, looking out into the black waters of the bay where they’ve docked for the night.
Only—the waters aren’t black.
Instead, they’re dappled with the occasional shimmer of something bright and blue in the surf that glows and then fades back into darkness. Lily stands there for a moment, watching as the phenomenon happens again and again, never in the exact same location and with no discernible timing.
“Is it…the waves?”
“I haven’t been able to figure it out,” James admits from her side, arm coming around her waist to pull her closer to him. “But it’s beautiful. Have you ever seen something like this before?”
Happy two years to my first-born multichap! This is a scene I wanted to include in the original fic, but wasn't able to, and I'm so happy to finally get to share it with you!
Chapter 20 - Pinkest Bluestocking of the Ton - A Jily Bridgerton AU
Another chapter added for PBOTT! I hope you will enjoy it and would like to stress that we are close to the end now.
Read Chapter 20 HERE!
Dearest Reader, the ton are abuzz with the latest gossip, and so it is my honour to impart to you the news that the Duke of Peverell has returned to London at last! A year after setting off on his tour of Europe, Lady Peverell's son has returned and rumour has it that his mother is preparing for the most joyous of occasions: a late summer wedding that sees her son wed the next Duchess of Peverell. It is my sincere hope that you have stored a bottle of wine for this most delightful of upcoming events for if ever there were a more determined mama, this writer is Icarus and this society paper has been scorched for flying too close to the sun.
A Jily Regency Romance inspired by Shondaland's Bridgerton.
For PBOTT: Talk about the characters’ struggles & how you decided on those
PS: I snorted when I read #21. You would have the same answer regardless of what fic I chose 😆
Let's get to #21 first then, because the answer is always: longer! So much longer! Brevity is not something I can do, it seems!
Pinkest Bridgerton of The Ton
For James, I very much wanted his story to centre around how grief had changed him. I wanted to create a James that ran away from his problems and didn't want to face them head-on. I suppose I was hoping to challenge myself in that sense, because James - in my opinion - does not beat around the bush, but this James was rejected by the young woman he - in childhood - had decided was going to be his wife and then lost his father, meaning that he had to live up to his father's title. It was something he very much did not want to do - as this meant accepting that his father had passed and that he was most certainly not willing to do - and it also meant that his life as he knew it was over. So, I suppose, in short you could say that James struggles with a fear of loss and that was something I really am quite interested in myself, because I also have trouble letting go.
For Lily, I decided that she was going to have financial issues and that Snape was going to be in on it. I also really wanted to give Lily - despite the loss of her parents - a steady parental figure still as I do tend to make my Lily suffer. I'm very happy I gave her that person in the form and shape of the Dowager Duchess Lady McGonagall. As always, though, Lily also suffers from insecurities and a mild inferiority complex which she tries to mask by burying her nose in books. Gaining knowledge on the natural world is a means of escapism for her. She would much rather pretend not to care about a husband than admit to the fact that she might have rejected the one gentleman she has ever loved. So, I would say that Lily has a tendency to live in denial.
