hey guys~ i’ve been inactive for quite a while i believe... i’ve never found the time to write or fulfill the promises i gave you. i guess i’ve just been too caught up with life. i think i’ve become disinterested in tumblr in general as well - toxic communities, validation through likes and reblogs, responsibilities to keep my followers entertained? i guess i didn’t want to do that anymore, but i miss you guys a lot :( i’ve become so distant with this blog, which i’ve worked so hard on and i’ve come so far. honestly, i think this blog is just making me a bit nostalgic as well... reminds me of the days i was still so obsessed with these boys. maybe that’s also why i’ve been inactive? welp. but i will still try to find time. i know that i haven’t done a lot of your requests. out of all the times i could’ve stopped writing, i just had to do it when everyone was sending requests my way. i’m sorry. anyway, i wrote this in my language arts class and being the emo person i am, i based it off of the butterfly preview. hopefully you guys are lenient with me... please enjoy the poem i’ve written, let it be a gift from me to you. i might not always update, but i will always keep you guys close to my heart~ <3
The sun was setting already, the ocean waves calmed my nerves.
As the sky was painted orange, the gentle breeze sang with the birds.
The cheers from below kept me going, even though sand filled my shoes.
For them, I kept on climbing—
For them, I kept on climbing, intoxicated by the booze.
My muscles were starting to cramp, my limbs about to give way.
Even so, I endured the pain, longing for a grand end to the day.
Clambering up the tower, merely built by pipes of lead,
I finally reached the top,
I balanced myself and stepped forward, the vertigo filling me with dread.
The space around me grew tight and the air in my lungs sluiced out.
My vision suddenly blurred as my heart began to doubt.
It would roughly be about a hundred meters before I’d hit the water.
Could I bring myself to do it?
Could I muster the courage to do it?
My body completely froze regardless of it getting hotter.
Yet, my friends’ screams broke the silence even from a distance so far.
I reluctantly looked down once more. The sight was the most bizarre.
Nothing was out of place except for their off-putting size.
They were simply miniscule dots,
The greatest insignificant dots,
They were the utmost trifling dots, gloriously roaring to the skies.
A smile spread across my face, warming my body throughout.
I focused on the horizon before me and gave a hearty shout.
My tensed fingers relaxed as I took a few steps behind me.
Taking the deepest of breaths,
Holding the longest of breaths,
I ran to the edge and leapt, shutting my eyes tightly.
Despite the fact I was falling, my heartbeat was all I could hear.
The rushing wind consoled me amidst the panic of contact growing near.
I landed in the sea feet first. The cold sent chills down my bones.
I tried to find the surface, swimming—
I eventually broke the surface, swimming, only to find that I was alone.
