Justice

[avengingsoranus]

@thegodhorus location: Lupercal Fairgrounds notes: for the lovers

Fortunately for Soranus, he was never alone, but at present Justice was sleeping trying to rally his strength for the upcoming fights. He knew how the other felt about Horus, jilted on behalf of Soranus in the way that the dawn elve just wouldn't allow himself to acknowledge. When he saw the God saw alone though, he moved to join him as he offered him a glass of the warm beer that was being passed around. "I think it's safe to drink, but I wouldn't want to make any promises." Soranus moved to take a seat next to the other as he looked out at the festival grounds, lycans scrapping together, people dancing, bands performing. The air was so alive, it was strange to feel so alien around happiness, but here he was, Soranus thought he should be used to it by now. "Did you sign up for any of the events?" Soranus did not want to come across as too eager, but he would like to see Horus in action again. It had been a long time and he thought that if there was nothing else that would make Horus feel like himself again, then it was seeing what it was that this realm had to offer.

[avengingsoranus]

"If you don't pick, I'll have to pick...sushi." Justice thought he was hilarious. Though the sense of the humor he was trying to get was slowly, slowly, getting better, the revenant still thought he was doing just great. "What else is there? You know I don't know anything about their...choices of food." Food, something so weird to him, but Soranus enjoyed it. And he felt the other's emotions all the time, so the joy was worth it, he supposed. "Your friend is back." Justice felt...anger, but it was twisted. Somehow different, but he didn't know the word for it. Emotions were confusing at best, and Horus' presence just made it worse.

[avengingsoranus]

"We were a great deal more than friends," Soranus corrected, though the bitterness in Justice's voice was easy to note, the old sword wished to see him protected at every turn, that anyone had swooped in must have irked the revenant the wrong way. "we had a family together; he loved me and I loved him." Loved being the operative tense, because as things stood between them now Soranus wasn't even sure if he could call the God a friend. Horus had gone his way after Eden's fall, Soranus his own, and as the God slept Soranus had grown into a quiet bitterness as he lost one home after another. "I don't think any of that matters now though, it was all very long ago. Please don't hold a grudge, we've all suffered, Justice."

[avengingsoranus]

"Lupercalia." Soranus stated simply, "Chancellor Zahrya has a fondness for the wolves of Lupercal, and I'm inclined to join him and his manifest; I'm sure Justice will have some with the games as well." Soranus, too, would manage to distill some fleeting joys from the gathering of supernatural species. It reminded him of ages that he'd long given up on, though there was a disquiet that lingered in the very base of his gut, he was resolved to see this age through to whatever would come next. The thought remained that this was not his home and that he missed the things that had been taken from him, but missing things did not bring them back; it just hurt. "Hopefully, we can meet then; welcome back, Horus. You have been missed." Soranus tipped his head lightly towards the other before moving to put the God behind him again. It was bittersweet in every sense of the word, unbearable to look upon someone who once thought you hung the sun in the sky but see their pain instead. If Soranus could take it for himself, he would if only Horus could walk this world as he should, with bright eyes and an open heart.

[thegodhorus]

It was an excuse really; even Horus had nerves and fear. No one gave him as much of those emotions as this gentle dawn elf. While the God's mind was indeed wrought with the confusion of waking in a new world, he knew deep down in his heart that some things never changed - such as the devotion he still felt towards this elve and that he would have liked to express that. It might have been a fine time to do it when it seemed that Soranus held no resentment but... no. No, not when the flame in his heart would become a wildfire and he'd burn simply from the nerves. If Soranus turned away from him it would simply consume him. A clear mind would do him well, the time and space to figure out how to undo the knot of apprehension in his chest. It tightened in that moment; Horus didn't want to leave but he also couldn't stay.

"Lupercalia," he agreed, the word unfamiliar. Perhaps Horus would find someone well-versed in the affairs of mortals and their offshoots while he was here. Nothing would keep him from attending this event. In fact, if it was as big as alluded with an elven Chancellor attending than it would grant the God the opportunity to see the vitality and strength of the people of this age at the same time. Perhaps that would give him courage. He nodded than tipped his own head in return, the knot in his chest painfully tight now as he watched the elve walk by.

END.

[thegodhorus]

Perhaps that had been what had initially drawn Horus so closely to this elve, a bringer of dawn that exemplified the very opposite of what the Seldarine strove to be. Warm, gentle, empathetic and humble - letting himself shoulder burdens that weren't his own despite having no obligation to. It had been curiousity and awe at first to know this elve. However, it quickly became clear to Horus that not even the Sun elves with their gaudy, sweltering castles and fire could warm him to the core or set his very soul aflame as much as Soranus could. Simplicity like this was not simplicity, it was strength and bravery of a different and far rarer variety. He'd fallen for Soranus because, deep down, all that Horus had wanted for himself was a life just like the one that the dawn elf tried to make for himself and for his people. If Horus had been warrior enough to be the eternal, careless killer that he had spent most of his life being he would have never fallen to such grief and ruin. He accepted that now. A part of his very being had known before his mind ever did, and that little part of him had been drawn to Soranus from the very beginning.

Now he'd likely all but ruined that. But he would hope to mend what he could - to establish some sort of relationship and camaraderie with the elve even if love was something Soranus wouldn't want anymore. His love for Soranus had once been a wildfire in his soul and it had since become a flicker of a candle for his own sanity. But even now he could feel the flames spreading, warming him, but threatening to burn him down if he caved in too quick. "I've always known you are kind and forgiving... I only hope with every ounce of my soul that that never betrays you again, Sora." There was a moment of hesitant silence as he considered him, a part of Horus aching to reestablish the too-brief physical contact but withholding. "I am not here to hide away more but I fear for what I would say to you without any sense of how this world has changed yet. Would you meet me again? Before the start of spring... as the snow begins to melt. I hope to gain my footing by then."

[avengingsoranus]

"Lupercalia." Soranus stated simply, "Chancellor Zahrya has a fondness for the wolves of Lupercal, and I'm inclined to join him and his manifest; I'm sure Justice will have some with the games as well." Soranus, too, would manage to distill some fleeting joys from the gathering of supernatural species. It reminded him of ages that he'd long given up on, though there was a disquiet that lingered in the very base of his gut, he was resolved to see this age through to whatever would come next. The thought remained that this was not his home and that he missed the things that had been taken from him, but missing things did not bring them back; it just hurt. "Hopefully, we can meet then; welcome back, Horus. You have been missed." Soranus tipped his head lightly towards the other before moving to put the God behind him again. It was bittersweet in every sense of the word, unbearable to look upon someone who once thought you hung the sun in the sky but see their pain instead. If Soranus could take it for himself, he would if only Horus could walk this world as he should, with bright eyes and an open heart.

[zahryaofdawn]

✿*° ‘° ･

Having been raised in such an isolated, unique way, it's unsurprising how closely Zahrya clings to the concept of family. His own inspired him day in and day out, giving Zahrya hope for the future each time he looked into his children's eyes. All he wanted now was for all the elves to experience the same. "We have peace now, so we can all be so fortunate. What of you, Soranus? A life in service to all families except your own? It's not what I want for you. Now that you've returned, perhaps you can fall in love as I have."

[avengingsoranus]

"I had a family, long ago." Soranus thought about the child that Horus had brought into the spring eladrin's life so that the two could raise him as if he were his own. "My song died a long time ago in Eden." Grief and anguish defined so much of what the elve had become; as quiet as his disposition was, he resented the mortals and the realm's many inhabitants for all that had been taken from them. Justice was a righteous spirit, but Soranus could feel him twisting around the elve's hate. "When my revenant broke, I somehow managed to fuse with him, but I won't be able to have any children as a result." There's a somber manner in the way Soranus speaks, he'd waited for so long to find the right person, too long.

[thegodhorus]

"You know as well as I that I cannot lie," Horus retorted. He found himself on the verge of a smile. Justice was a very hard creature to warm up to but no matter how difficult the spirit's presense was, years had made Horus softer to him. The rough-hewn part of the Revenant was fully a warrior and that was who the God had been for the majority of his life. Ihy had loved the Revenant, his son considering Justice the fun and interesting one between all of the men at home despite the very hard edges of his personality.

Any trace of softness and amusement faded away. "I woke up. All the worlds were shaken; that's what I've come to learned happened while I slept. I don't know if it was the war of Gods or... if it was that I'd promised to wake from my sleep only when humanity tried to make amends for what they'd created in my name. They are trying."

[avengingsoranus]

They'd been good friends at one point, as friendly as a revenant made from Justice could be. He was harsh and demanding, but loyal, true, never strayed from what he knew was right. As of late, however, things were different. He felt rage. He felt something that was no longer considered righteous fury; he felt...like he was owed blood. Blood for blood, an eye for an eye; he knew the words. Those that had done nothing to slight him personally would still know death, Vengeance would make sure of it. His purpose tainted, his identity skewed, he had nothing but to look ahead at what next fight he could find.

"What do you know of what happened?" He said finally, knowing that Soranus was perhaps desperate to come out and talk to the other. He'd have to wait his turn. It was Justice's time to be a bully. "Did you have a nice nap while the rest of us continued on?"

[avengingsoranus]

Justice jumpscared some poor soul and Soranus frowned immediately after his other half had finished laughing. "I'm so sorry," Soranus said immediately toward the bewildered elve; though it wasn't Soranus who had done it, he still felt at least partially responsible. "No, no, I don't really feel like sushi." He didn't know what he wanted but knew that wasn't something he was craving right now. It was a good suggestion though.

[avengingsoranus]

"If you don't pick, I'll have to pick...sushi." Justice thought he was hilarious. Though the sense of the humor he was trying to get was slowly, slowly, getting better, the revenant still thought he was doing just great. "What else is there? You know I don't know anything about their...choices of food." Food, something so weird to him, but Soranus enjoyed it. And he felt the other's emotions all the time, so the joy was worth it, he supposed. "Your friend is back." Justice felt...anger, but it was twisted. Somehow different, but he didn't know the word for it. Emotions were confusing at best, and Horus' presence just made it worse.

[tryingtoremembermyname]

« i wish i wasn’t so angry all the time. »

[thegodhorus]

I'm home now. Horus lived among divine and elves all his inordinately long and primordial life; it was sometimes easier than breathing to pick up on the nuances of tone and words. And he had known Soranus well, once upon a time. If he did not say he was well, then he was not. Horus took steps forward towards him, the wind rustling the grass and wildflowers at his feet.

Winter was rest, summer was not much different. Autumn and spring were movement, the awakening of change as wind rustled the foliage and beckoned the living to rise. The world was entering a new era. Bear cubs came out of their slumbers and dens in the spring, farmers worked the fields to harvest their bounties in autumn. Horus was not made or spring or autumn but the wind was a cherished friend of his and it danced lighter in the presense of the dawn elf. It rustled the trees and took on a floral and more uplifting scent with every step closer to Soranus. "My dreams gave me rest but there is no reprieve. It seems I have to find that on my own." His steps halted just a arm's width away from the dawn elf. "I see that I hurt you, Soranus, and I'd done that so long ago in my own hurt... However, I never wanted you to be my collateral. I never intended it to end this way. Centuries might pass but you'll never be a stranger so be honest with me, reject me, scold me, anything at all... I think I could bare it a lot easier than the quiet resentment in your eyes."

[avengingsoranus]

Horus had approached, and it was simple for Soranus to close the distance between them. This seemed to be the price for loving a God; it was impossible not to be drawn into their orbit regardless of the circumstances surrounding their arrival. Many years ago, the elve was resolved to spend eternity with the man standing before him; it hadn't been Soranus' decision to go their separate ways. Truthfully, his disposition didn't allow him to beg or crawl; everything about him was sympathetic, and if it pained Horus to look at him, then he'd endeavored to make it easier for God to not see him.

"Oh Horus, I don't resent you; I could never resent you." Soranus lightly touched the other's arm, "I understand you." The elve was reasonable and empathetic enough to know that Horus had never intended to hurt him, that whatever emotional injury Soranus had sustained was a casualty of Horus' decision to protect his own feelings. That did not negate Soranus' hurt, nor did it take away the fact that while the elve had also been grieving, he hadn't been alone at the very least. Some had long periods where they were liberated from the pain of recollection, but Soranus wasn't among them; the smiling faces of this younger generation with all their hopes and dreams only served to remind him of those, like him, who'd once been filled with that very same optimism. "That you chose to awake at all is something I respected; truthfully, I never expected to see you again; if our situations were reversed, I'm not sure I would have returned." Uthenera sounded nice and peaceful. Rest for the weary soul. "But I am glad you did."

[meryasek]

Meryasek felt sorry for Soranus now, looking at the Dawn Elf who was so overjoyed every time a new eladrin had been brought into the world. The other was now combined with his revenant, and that was surely the reason Soranus no longer felt like he could. "One day, you might." Soranus didn't have to carry the child, anyway. Someone would take one for the team. "You'll have your hands full with Zahrya, anyway. One at a time."

[avengingsoranus]

Soranus tried to imagine what it'd be like trying to raise a child alongside Justice and all but quivered at the thought; he'd seen the way the revenant treated youth in the past, or anyone that wasn't Soranus for that matter. "No, I won't, and that's alright. I'm content with my role, working alongside Zahrya is a privilege." Soranus had nothing but love for the exuberant chancellor, and for the fey'ri who seemed to always know everything about the people around him.

[thegodhorus]

Date: January, some time Location: Audele, by the tree Characters: @avengingsoranus [for JUSTICE] & @thegodhorus Notes: o hi again

Horus hadn't seen such a view in very long. Ihy had died by the roots of the gold tree in Eden when the seraphim first struck. However, his son had always loved to play and train by the glow and comfort of its magical branches and Horus couldn't find much reason to be solemn as he looked up and remembered the avariel's joy. There was a melancholy in his heart but it was also a good feeling to stand under such a tree again. He didn't look away up until the air nearby shifted around a familiar body. But the gait and breath of this familiar body was not the one of the man he'd loved. He'd long since learned the distinction well.

"Justice," Horus greeted, turning to look at the Revenant. "It's good to see you again."

[avengingsoranus]

"Don't lie to me," Justice sneered, though he had something akin to a smile on his face. It was forced, but it was enough. The revenant had been there, for centuries, watching all of this unfold. Soranus raising a child that wasn't truly his. Justice used to be kinder, but he was tainted by Soranus' anger, his sorrow – Vengeance stood in his place as he looked at Horus. Love was once a sense of strength, Justice had been sure of it, yet it caused so much pain – how could one want that? "You're here now. Why?"

[thegodhorus]

And yet just as these gardens have changed, so have I. His expression was almost unreadable, only the barest hint of something melancholy buried within the stoic exterior as Horus gave Soranus the barest of nods. Once upon a time, the god would all but run across fields and gardens to greet Soranus, the fey who'd become both lover and family in his life. The first and only one. Horus would laugh and smile like the sun itself lived within him, warming him from the inside out when in the presense of the man who had given everything to be everything to a god and his avariel child. Ihy had seen Soranus as a father in every way, and perhaps the fey had always been a better parent than any of the divine, including Horus, could ever hope to be. But Horus had learned true love at Soranus' side, true gentleness and the joy that anyone could find with such simple things that weren't heralded by trumpets of war or followed by the devastation of power and blade. Simple things like cooking a meal at someone's side, simple joys like watching a fawn take its first steps in the meadow or simple comforts like the first brush of morning light through an open window.

"There is no need," he replied. No need for a herald or for Soranus to leave, Horus did not elaborate because he himself was not sure what he had meant yet. Then the dawn elf spoke again and Horus' heart stuttered in his chest, shaking like glass that had been taken to with a gentle hammer. "I have no glories left to my name, no crown or victories of which to speak of. Those I had only left behind devastation. So I do not need a herald, nor do I need you to leave your own home for my sake." He couldn't reassure Soranus and say that the sight of him did not bring him pain because he could not lie. But that wasn't the full truth regardless- "The sight of you brings me relief and joy, Soranus." He tried to smile but it looked more like the grimace of someone who had just buried a loved one - weak and still filled with pain despite all effort. "I will never not be grateful that you live and I..." he hesitated, almost overcome by the truth, "it is good to see you again... To hear your voice." Very uncharacteristic to the god, he seemed shy and uncertain as he continued, all hint of a smile fading. "I knew you were alive, but it is another feeling to get the proof of it." Another hesitation. "Are you well?"

[avengingsoranus]

Soranus' gift was a thing of beauty, felt in the gentle spring breeze that filtered through the trees. It was as soft and delicate as a feather, yet it carried with it the promise of new beginnings. With each passing moment, the sun climbed higher in the sky, casting its warm embrace over the land below. The first breath of fresh air after the snow had melted away was a sweet, invigorating sensation that filled the lungs and lifted the spirit. As the dawn broke over the season, it marked the start of longer days and shorter nights; in this, Soranus couldn't help but feel a sense of hope and renewal. And as the frost ebbed away and the shadows fell, there was a subtle shift in the air and the leaves, revealing the winter's bones beneath the melting snow. It was a beautiful yet bittersweet reminder that nothing in life was permanent and that change was an inevitable part of the natural world. Even among immortals there was nothing true about permanence, only that something could be for a very long time, and then in a singular moment be over.

"Likewise, Horus. I'm home now, once again." It was a nonanswer, but the elve was incapable of lying. Uthenera had been Horus' answer to the insurmountable grief that he had experienced; Soranus supposed that it was better to sleep than turn to stone; the latter might have been his own fate had Justice not been there to push him forward. "You slept a long time, Horus. Did your dreams give you what this world could not?" In natural cadence, Soranus' tone was always void of malice; whatever ire had taken root in his heart could never be directed at the God in front of him. For all that Soranus had lost, Horus had lost even more, and so alone in his understanding, the elve had been.

[zahryaofdawn]

✿*° ‘° ･

Soranus was such a welcome breath of fresh air. Everyone else took the process of childrearing so lightly, but for Zahrya there were few higher priorities. Dawn was the herald of nature, and as its Chancellor he understood that reproduction and survival existed hand in hand. "I sung so many times with suitable and unsuitable matches yet only had fortune once. I took Laer's to the bass and was blessed with a most splendid daughter, but Alastor's physical touch gave me so much more. They may not be elves, but they are miracles regardless."

[avengingsoranus]

Soranus could only imagine how jarring and blessed it must have been for Zahrya to have sung at those he deemed unworthy with his fertile song. The sort of union that Zahrya described was at least partly what Titania feared, that her kind would fall in love, and what few of them remained would dwindle out into the tributaries of other species. Soranus wasn't so critical, if the elves were to end then they were to end for something else; though the disquiet in him fed something vengeful in Justice. "You have a very blessed family, few are so fortunate."

[avengingsoranus]

"Anything," Justice answered easily, not entirely wishing to make a decision. If there were so many places that Soranus wanted to try, then it should've been easy enough to pick one. For one moment, there was an easy stride about the elf, until someone ventured too close and Justice brought a fist up, making them flinch. The revenant laughed, "Made you flinch," he hissed at the passerby, who looked bewildered since they'd been certain it was Soranus. "How about sushi. Sushi is nice. A good creation."

[avengingsoranus]

Justice jumpscared some poor soul and Soranus frowned immediately after his other half had finished laughing. "I'm so sorry," Soranus said immediately toward the bewildered elve; though it wasn't Soranus who had done it, he still felt at least partially responsible. "No, no, I don't really feel like sushi." He didn't know what he wanted but knew that wasn't something he was craving right now. It was a good suggestion though.

[avengingsoranus]

It always felt nice when Justice didn't put up a fight; he argued and beat on everyone else, but when it came to the dawn elve, he was resigned to doing whatever Soranus asked. Sometimes, it took coaxing, like when Soranus had introduced him to a record player, but it was always worth it because now Justice couldn't get enough of Taylor Swift. Where Justice took great strides, Soranus' steps were smaller and more measured. When he bumped into them, he would apologize to inanimate objects out of habit. Their pace varied whenever the two conversed, something that was comical for anyone on the outside looking in. "There are many places I want to try," Soranus admitted, "but what do you feel like having?"

[avengingsoranus]

"Anything," Justice answered easily, not entirely wishing to make a decision. If there were so many places that Soranus wanted to try, then it should've been easy enough to pick one. For one moment, there was an easy stride about the elf, until someone ventured too close and Justice brought a fist up, making them flinch. The revenant laughed, "Made you flinch," he hissed at the passerby, who looked bewildered since they'd been certain it was Soranus. "How about sushi. Sushi is nice. A good creation."

[avengingsoranus]

"You want to go out to dinner?" The revenant was still coming to terms with this world. He hadn't been in it for long, and the new modern things still scared him at times. He'd beaten a cell phone to death already with the hilt of a knife, unsure why it was playing fiend music. Then Soranus had introduced him to other music, and now Justice enjoyed listening to things that sounded like nails down a chalkboard. "Okay. Then I'll take you out to dinner. Where are we going?" He wiped the blood from his blade now, watching it disappear before marching towards the exit. His walk was always aggressive, it's how other elves knew to move out of the way if they saw them coming.

[avengingsoranus]

It always felt nice when Justice didn't put up a fight; he argued and beat on everyone else, but when it came to the dawn elve, he was resigned to doing whatever Soranus asked. Sometimes, it took coaxing, like when Soranus had introduced him to a record player, but it was always worth it because now Justice couldn't get enough of Taylor Swift. Where Justice took great strides, Soranus' steps were smaller and more measured. When he bumped into them, he would apologize to inanimate objects out of habit. Their pace varied whenever the two conversed, something that was comical for anyone on the outside looking in. "There are many places I want to try," Soranus admitted, "but what do you feel like having?"

[meryasek]

Soranus' excitement only made Mery wrinkle his nose to hide a laugh, "No, no." He waved his hand now, "Been there, done that. Maybe another. But I don't know if that's possible." Perhaps he could have another fey'ri, one like him. The hollowborn twins were in good hands, growing every day and having the run of all the courts. It was all they'd deserved and more. Soranus' love for children reminded him of Zahrya, and that maybe one day he'd have another. "I don't even know if I can." Meryasek considered the other for a moment, "And you? No one would probably make a better parent."

[avengingsoranus]

"I spent a long time waiting for the right person," Soranus admitted; he knew it was occasionally possible for an elve to produce a child on their own... But that had not been the case for him, and certainly not as an eladrin. He'd been happy to raise Horus' child alongside the God, pleased for a time, anyways. "now though," Soranus thought about Justice and the body that was no longer his own. "it's no longer possible for me to have children of my own, so I'll take to helping others with theirs whenever I can."