Deployed

Afghanistan

[avgeguyntion]

What could he be yelling? What do you think?

[imladylunaticbitch]

Rant time.

Right. I know I rant a lot but I need to get things out. Being a girl who loves playing xbox, playstation and games, it irritates the hell out of me that if you type in gamer girl in to the search on majority of social media sites, it will be 99% of girls showing so much cleavage and in bras and panties holding a controller or with a headset on. I’m not claiming to be into all games or that I’m such a huge gamer. I love games, always have always will. And I’m not saying people shouldn’t be happy and confident with their bodies. If you want to show it, feel free. But holding a controller in a photo, wearing a headset or having a game on your lap does not make you a gamer. Trust me, 90% of girls who game that I know, sit in their rooms in sweats, a baggy top and with messy hair, screaming and swearing at the fame where they get frustrated and don’t sit there thinking ‘I can get so many likes with this’ Just no. Play games, feel free to but don’t give girls who game a bad rep.

[13roots]

[geminigeek]

When you realize tomorrow is Monday.

[avgeguyntion]

Why can't I

I know this is a silly thing but man why can’t I find that beautiful gamer girl type. That woman that I can take out to dinner see a nerd movie then head back to my house for a battle royal on some game we both enjoy lol

[avgeguyntion]

Not knowing what to do.

I have recently gotten out of the military. And since I have felt at a loss. I have worked my hardest at the jobs that I'm at. But it all feels like I have accomplished nothing. Once again I am drunk, but not because I have to. But because I'm bored. But being drunk leads to nothing but sorrow. I can tell my friends judge me. I can tell that my thoughts towards life does not make sense to others. I feel lost, I thought getting out would help me. But I sometime feel like I should be back in it. Back to the fray. Back to the danger where life felt real. I don't know what's going on anymore. But I put on a face of confidence and hit every obstacle I face with all i have. How far will it take me though, when will my strength fail me. Who knows....

[avgeguyntion]

Doing better...

So I know for whatever reason I was in a dark place when I started this account. But I've seen through my ways and my stupidity for the words that I posted. And though I cannot take them back I am sorry for them. All I can do know is be a better person and a better friend, I need to stop looking at only my needs but the needs of my friends involved in those posts. And I can only hope they forgive me.

[operatorsgonnaoperate]

Infantry of the American 501st Airborne Division and 25th Airborne division conducting live-fire exercises in the barren fields of Alaska.

[avgeguyntion]

I don't love you anymore, as much as it kills me to say I don't. You have chosen a path that doesn't have enough room for me. So I have to give you up, I have to say I'm done. Because the pain is to much, the desire for your hand and your kiss drive me crazy. But they are not for me, I can only hope the one lucky enough to be with you realizes who he has and that he treats you like a queen. Good night, sleep tight, and sweet dreams. From the soldier who no longer loves you.

[avgeguyntion]

Black hawk landing while I was pulling security in Afghanistan.

[avgeguyntion]

Afghanistan mountains today 😊

[avgeguyntion]

Wants

Time is slow, Distance is a bitch, And fate is cruel. Memories are painful, Heart is full of sadness, And my mind is clouded. All I want in this world, The one thing that can make me smile, Is you...

[learning-2love-myself]

//

[learning-2love-myself]

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[learning-2love-myself]

//

[avgeguyntion]

Your not the one...

I've loved you for years, you said you felt the same. When we hold each other I can feel the two halves of our hearts becoming whole. The smell of your hair, the touch of your hand, the sound of your breath. Sends electricity throughout my being, and it calms my soul. I can feel the love between us, I can see the happy days ahead if we were together. But that would be to close to a fairy tale. Instead it's a romantic tragedy. You find someone else, I go off to war. And now I'm incomplete, my thoughts turn to you and what could have been. Where did I go wrong....

[avgeguyntion]

What have you brought to the table...

I’ve promised my heart to you, I’ve waited for you for 6 years. But instead of love, I’ve received rejection on more then one occasion. I’ve done my best to be there for you. But you stay quiet to the pain I expressed. Only when I’m in town do you even show any interest in me, but its little to none in the big picture. Then when I’m in another country, risking my life for my country you tell me that you love me, miss me, that you want to hold me. What kind of sick game are you playing. You know that I would kill or die for you. But would you even cry for me. Would you even remember me after a time. I doubt it, you can’t stay out of a relationship for longer then a few months and you’re heart changes more then your clothes. I want you but you don’t share the feeling. I tear my brain apart trying to decide whether to keep up this game with you or attempt to end it. But idk what to do, you have destroyed my ability to look for other woman for a long term relationship due to this thing called love that you seem to have trapped my heart and soul into. If there are any more promises going to be made its this one, burn me and I promise you will never see me again, never will you be able to reach me and torture me with your words. This is what love had brought me. This is what I’m supposed to feel when I finally find the woman to marry…this is crap.