Short stories---- Johns path in becoming a better man. Offline /Path to becoming a better man! Chapter I THE END - Figuring the pieces Overcoming emotional breakdown isn’t a fairytale, nor is it meant for the mentally fragile. It's a doom mixed with thorns and dead ends. January is here again, and the plague comes tormenting; this time, I ended my life to be rebirthed. No, I didn’t commit suicide, probably that could have made things easier, but there is still balance in my anxiety. Flesh for flesh, blood for blood, and bone for bone. I made these words a religion while waiting on one of the most influential people in my life. Dark clouds, salty lips, searching for miracles in the sky. I asked myself if it had happened? The end is a menace to mental stability, irrespective of whether the author is the propagator or not. I remembered how Ana, a good friend of over a decade, will always resound that pain is necessary for change. Although I was reluctant to buy that idea, I believed more in miracles and silence for time to take its turn. Miracles may exist, but not in these terms. The fear of past traumas is like earthworms; they surface in season; therefore, happiness isn’t an absence of trauma or pain; it's the malnourishment of how broken pieces feed the soul, a poor architecture for good self-esteem drains every inch of our energy. How steady I am in times of pain mesmerizes me. Little taquicardia, shortened breath, and other weird thoughts my brain can’t imagine. right there in my cozy apartment dwarfing on my bedroom floor, I picked up my phone and called a friend - — Hello Ana. Hey boy -I messed up, I’m a lot of mess up, and I can’t figure out how easy this would be. Ana “Humm Have you eaten today? Taking a shower or breakfast? Checked the news or watched a movie?” No, I exclaimed in a not-so-friendly tone. “I’m not joking! I’m messed up! I’m giving up on life and everything!” Ana - I know! I just needed to be sure to continue with the conversation! I know you very well! at least for ten years, and that, my friend, is enough for me to know your heart and character.” Ana whispered gently. John, in a soft tone and mumble words, “Really?” “Yes, boy! I won’t cancel you for your wrongs; I’d instead enlighten you on what I feel is best! You are a Good Man, and shit happens.” “My world is crumbling, Ana!” said John as he wept profusely on the phone. “Hey boy, relax and listen to me! You’ve got this! Circumstances don’t define the future nor who we truly are!” “Thank you, Ana; you’ve been a blessing.” “Now share your agony with me, and let’s pick them up in pieces.” “My best relationship just ended, and I caused it; I’m not mentally capable of speaking about it in detail; that’s how bad it sounds!” exclaimed John as he kept mumbling Ana, with a kindly tone, said “You’ve been a man that reprime things; you prefer to resolve them alone! I admire that, but pains should be shared and spoken about!” “Have you eaten today?” John quickly interrupted with a complete change in mood and voice “No boy, um, still thinking of what I should do.” They both laughed — Ana asked - pasta and tomatoes or Sardines? “Tomatoes!” exclaimed John “Okay! got you, boy, I’ll go for sardines.” They both laughed hard again. “Hey! got to go now, Ana. I’ll take a shower as indicated and try something on the TV.” “Ok, boy, I’ll be here to listen whenever you intend to talk.” Lesson one – Avoid being reclusive about your feelings. You are what your emotions transcend; breathe it out. SOLILOQUY The rail station is approximately 3 km from my apartment, and I could easily be awakened by the sound of their breaks at 5 am every morning. Another day dawned, but this time, I was fast awakened by the sounds of my alarm. Quite irritated, I staggered out of bed to dress up for my daily medical call. “Oh, what a day to be a doctor again!” John yawned as he stretched in his white linen!!! Took his vitamins, feeling unmotivated and derailed by the past íncident that occurred hours ago. At approximately 6:50 am, he was set for the day. His well-cut surgical coat and black shoes trembling on the hospital tiles, resonating sounds that call attention from every corner! “Good morning, people!” “How was your night?” John asked the nurses on duty! “Fine, Doctor!” they replied in a harmonic and coordinated manner. Even with uncomfortable people, greeting strangers and friends is a prevalent habit John possesses. A childhood trait of cultural influence, well mastered and sophisticatedly practiced. “Any coffee to start the day with?” he asked, teasing the nurse, Mariam “Yes! Doc! that will be ready in a minute!” “I’ll make you taste the best coffee made in Colombia” “Wow, I never had one before! I’ll be happy to taste!”. “You’ll love it, doc.” “Thanks, Mariam! You are always kind to me.” “Don’t mention doc.” Amid my daily routine, I cheated on my girlfriend a few days later! I caught myself in random distress. Irritability but with calm voice when responding to questions from colleagues, hiding tears of regrets and pain while prepping for my patient for the day. My mind isn’t here, neither is my soul, but my body needs to fight to stay for the good of humanity and professionalism. After a few hours of work and difficulty in max productivity, John took a break with more cups of coffee. He sat in a corner away and stared at void! In a low but soothing voice, I was in a trance trapped in a locum of anguish, where my lips synched what my brain had prepared. I can’t convey the silence, the happiness deprived due to imbalanced loyalty. However, a glimpse into the outer mind gives an insight into our natural fears, strength, and weakness. The moment we insert the body into energies of an unknown source, permitting her movement more flexibly, No, don't get me wrong!!! Perfection is for the fool, while the beauty in mistakes is what makes the story perfect. A story should never measure our tendency, nor should it be measured by a session or activity. The hunger in which the mind encounters itself after every downfall is the energy we need to install in our bodies. I have not seen any man better than I am; I have only seen men with many flexible energies. Therefore I'll rise above my mistakes, use them as a pilar, get the hell up and work because I got freaking patients to prep. "Hey, Doc! is everything alright?" Amanda asked "Yeah!" I responded creepily. "I'm just taking a moment to reflect." "I can imagine, Doc! Public health is a disaster and demands our mental strength." "Damn right!!!" I exclaimed, trying to convey the topic, and hide my not-so-normal moment "Where can I get more coffee, please?" "Doc! Doc! take it easy, or you might overdose on caffeine; check the coffee room. I guess the flask should have more than enough." I chuckled and held Amanda's face like a pet... "You are the best, Amanda!!!." I rushed down for more cups to continue with the day's activities. On the path to becoming a better man- learn to share your burden. Narratives, advice, words are never little, neither should they be neglected for their sources. When feeling down, Ethics demands that you take a break. Leave your routine for at least a day. People's time, work, and life is valuable. Take a break!!!!