I can't stop thinking about this, because it's not actually that insane. The problem the first time Qingyi went to prison, and why his brother is right to feel guilty, is because both the Murong and Li families rejected Qingyi so publicly that the Huo family didn't think there would be any consequences for abusing him. Which is why that awful Li father was also correct that they weren't protecting Qingyi properly and it was an insult to both of their families.
But now that Qingyi knows his brother will defend him, and Qingyu has defended him in public multiple times, Qingyi's immunity is getting stronger (everyone just lets him kill those grunts in front of the police) but he's also just using it to do more insane things. Before, when he didn't have support, he was more cautious. Well somewhat, because he's always set his own safety at zero.
Qingyu trying to protect Qingyi is totally backfiring. It's like now that he knows he has a seat belt he's ignoring the fact that going 200km an hour is still dangerous, seat belt or not. He's like those asshole scion characters who do whatever they want because they know their father will cover for them, except he's not going to brothels or beating servants, he's trying to help a girl murder people.
@aysekira and I were discussing that the only person in MRQY’s life who loves him unconditionally is his brother but that is not helping ML at all because he’s too damaged and so precisely because he knows his da’ge will always take care of him, he does not glom on to that emotionally.
Because of his horrific childhood, I think ML keeps chasing, keeps being addicted to the need to try to win over the impossible - look at his utter lack of love from three of the four parents and what he got from his adoptive mother - it’s like his modus operandi is keep throwing himself on knives to see if he can win the impossible (love and devotion) if he sacrifices enough. If he does it’s like healing the childhood or something.
He is like one of those men who can only get off if someone beats them but in an emotional version of the same.
And because da’ge’s love is freely offered and easily given, it does not satisfy his need. He relies on it and he loves his brother, but it cannot give him what he craves.
I think he’s even more fucked up than FL because she at least had some sliver of normalcy in her family as a young child. ML basically opened his eyes to abuse and when he got taken at 12, it could very well have been too late even if he did get a loving family instead of what he got (da’ge may have tried but one teen boy is not enough to fix that when the rest is what it is.)
As to the happy ending - I can’t even imagine what that would look like for these two. Like let’s say they survived and ended up together. Then what? I cannot imagine their long term. They are not well, and I don’t think they are capable of healing together but also I think he chases this impossibility, this edge and if and when it’s gone, eventually he will be lost (one of the reasons the early relationship worked was because it was so brief - 3 months is prime honeymoon period.)
Neither of them even wants to escape or change but more than that I just don’t think either is capable of long term happiness.
Yes! To all of it but yeah I don't totally know what a happy ending would even look like, I hope they end it well 🤞 (logically that is, it doesn't need to be happy)
Also, this is a rare drama for me where the ML's undying devotion makes total sense but it's also not presented as swoon-worthy, it's deeply unhealthy and everyone knows that. Qingyi is chasing 3 brief months of happiness that were followed by three year of suffering and he doesn't care. He should care!
Yes!
One of the things I love about this is that the narrative is very clear this relationship is unhealthy and bad, that these people are incredibly fucked up and bad for each other. None of that “showing one thing but trying to convince you it’s a different thing.”
There is a level of horror to it all, tbh because none of this is a demonstration of how much he loves her. It’s all a demonstration of how destroyed he is on a fundamental level.
And the thing is - I am fully on board with believing she loves him as much as it’s possible for her to love another person. But while her manner of loving satisfies the fucked up part of him to a t, it’s very much not the kind of love he needs for healing or living as a functional individual. But the tragic thing is if he got some healthy warm love, he wouldn’t want it or know what to do with it. He can only process love through giving or receiving hurt.
And they both find it much easier to die for each other than to live with each other.
It’s a spiral with no out.
