Azeezwrites

Humor writer. I quite enjoy writing and I quite enjoy making people laugh so I thought I'd combine the two

[azeezwrites]

I often wondered why I have no tribal mark, given the background of my dad’s family and my surname. Loosely translated it means the knife man cometh, not like Michael Myers but more like circumcision; they used knife back in the day you see. Heck, my dad has a knife that was passed down to him, he has shown me this knife and hinted it would be passed down to me, my first question was: how much is it worth? I have not seen the knife since then, but the vulture is a patient bird 😉. My dad’s family was big on cutting people up in a pretty way, at least they thought it was pretty, it would nice to do a survey of everyone with tribal mark and get a concrete answer. LINK TO FULL POST IN BIO #azeezwrites #nigerianwriters #lagosblogger https://www.instagram.com/p/B3guRcIFnVp/?igshid=66juy8zf3upc

[azeezwrites]

I enjoy telling people I don’t drink, just to see the look on their faces, before adding “apart from red wine” and most of the time I just get an eye roll as if to say: what are you feeling like, you pretentious prick? But I honestly don’t drink. Apart from red wine. I should mention that I am no wine enthusiast, red wine just happens to be the only alcohol I can drink without degenerating into a first-class retard. I don’t know a lot about red wine either, if you poured Zobo or Ribena into a glass and labelled it red wine, I would believe you and think hmm this is delicious, I have found my favourite red wine. I don't drink beer and cider because I have a weak bladder and I am guaranteed to wet the bed if I try it. I don't drink white wine because it is what you get when you distil satan’s piss. I don't drink hard liquor because I will get drunk. Not tipsy, drunk. I cannot hold my liquor. I did not taste alcohol until I went off to University. I tried it so I could say tasted alcohol like one of the cool kids. When I eventually did, I was disappointed. It was bitter and I didn’t take enough to be tipsy, talk less of getting drunk. Why do people drink it recklessly just to start acting like a lunatic? I wondered. Ah well, at least I don't have to worry about turning into one of them. This was before she dumped me twice in the 3 months summer break after the 1st year. Link to the rest in my bio... #azeezwrites #alcholic https://www.instagram.com/p/B3OuBxhFqtC/?igshid=s933qbnc4wdl

[azeezwrites]

Tiwa one months review (Old Post)

So today makes it a month since Tiwa moved in and I want to review what that's been like and what I ve learnt. She has her own shite tv addiction, I mean I

#humor #writing #marriage

[azeezwrites]

Azeez Writes

It’s been a year (more like 18 months) of reflection. Like a cocoon going through metamorphosis, I am emerging 18 months later as a butterfl

#humor #writing #reflecting #afrobeats