Wanderlust

Sebastian // 21 // Germany // male // Iryou-Kei // ♥ Movies, Books, Tv shows and music // Anime, Manga and gaming ♥ // Please talk to me ! I love talking ! //

[azraelsfeathers-blog]

- I'm gonna let this blog die and do a new one -

-- Sorry to all my followers, but I decided to give up on this blog and not use it anymore -- -- People from the book exchange will recieve answers daily until everything has been sent --- -- People I've talked to often or that are inspiring to me will recieve a message and//or I'll follow them on my new blog -- --- If you wanna hear my reasons, check out below ---

Tumblr was once a place I did not understand. I had heard of Tumblr before I got here, I had even looked at tumblr blogs - but I never really got what it was about. Years later, a dear friend brought me to tumblr and I fell in love with this website. This dear friend and I have not spoken to each other in 13 months for stupid reasons. Everything on this blog reminds me of that friend. Idk how to explain it, but sometimes I scroll through messages I'm too scared to delete because I'm too scared to forget anything about her, and everything comes back. And it still feels like hell to me. So being on this  blog has never been the same. Moreover, I realised I became a sad / depression blog. And at first I liked it. I liked how other people could understand my feelings exactely, how other people could have similar experiences and so on. I loved being a depression blog, I loved browsing and reposting depression blogs .... until I realised: I had lost myself in it. During the last months, my depression got worse again. Really worse. There were certain influences from my real life, but it took months and months full of negativity and a lovuing girlfriend to make me see: part of my depression was caused by tumblr. My English is not good enough to explain this exactely, but I can say that I think that as long as I follow and reblog depression stuff, or things about self harm, suicide, etc., I'll never be able to fully recover. And I want to recover. I want it more than anything.

I saw a lot of people here (not all of you, guys!), who seemed to be content with their problems and diseases. Who seemed to like it. I saw people making contests  about who had fought the most and hardest battles. People who were proud to drown in their feelings. So I became content. So I became hopless. And so I began to drown. But I am more than this. I need a new start. A new blog. New memories.

I am sorry to all my followers who are depression /sad / ... blogs. I'll not follow any blog of this kind anymore. It's extremly triggerin for me and I don't want to lose control over my emotions, my disease or my life ever again. If you are running a recovery-only or non-depression blog, please send me the link and I will follow you. 

I do, however, thank all of you for every experience, every little bit of a talk we shared, every little memory. I'll not delete this blog so I will not forget anything.

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Twitter: @ timurborgir

[the-beauty-of-words-blog]

[azraelsfeathers-blog]

Hey! I just saw your post on Germann about the book exchange. Do you have any German language sci-fi or fantasy? I'd be happy to send some back in English. (I have few books in French, but there is a kids novel that I liked that I could send too)

Ooh English is perfectly fine :) And yes, I love fantasy, so I own a million of these :) Do you have any wishes? Or should I just pick some good ones out?

[shubbabang]

you know that thing where you scrunch up your arms and it looks like you have only hands well this one time when i was little i kept it up for 3 days no matter where i was

one time i also pissed off my entire family for 3 days

[phosphenewatchers]

the last picture i cANT BREATHE

[becausebirds]

A thirsty bird asks for some water. x

[biologizeable]

In today’s news I will never not find feeding crows hilarious

[becausebirds]

how i act with carrots and hummus

[ceemaxoxo-deactivated20110601]

REBLOG if your icon is actually you.

[japanesefashionlovers]

[vk-on-the-streets]

[visualove-bitch]

[hanako-flowerchild]

[the-beauty-of-words-blog]

[psychofactz]

[azraelsfeathers-blog]

Yay

So I finally got my phone to install Snapchat and Kik. As far as I know, some of my followers use both. Mind sending me your contact names so we can chat or something? :D

[cleverandboring]

john green this is all ur fault stop blaming the stars

[baltazahr-blog]