Cool with violence

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So while some of us procrastinate... 13 more to go, work that exp Drift.

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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/He moved even closer to the hatches, nearly hugging the wall in order to read the effaced inscriptions. They couldn’t pick just any random corpse! That could ruin everything!/

/Squinting his optics he carefully read every name on the hatches placed in the vertical line. His digits trailed the engraved names until he suddenly made a loud “AHAH!” noise and busted the flap open with his hidden in the frame combat knife. With one swift motion he pulls out the oblong metal coffin, not caring much about the loud metallic bang it makes upon hitting the flooring. Another swing of the knife, one solid kick and the coffin’s lid falls to the side making even more noise./

And there we have our first volunteer~! Meet Blastkicker! Ready to try to give life a kick again!

/Drift laughs excitedly and leans over the coffin, resting one of his legs on the edge of it to get a better look at their soon-to-be screamer. The body despite the obvious signs of rust has been in good condition. The large gaping hole in Blastkicker’s midsection gave away that the poor fellow kicked the bucket thanks to a blast that went through his body. Nonetheless there was enough of dead parts for dark energon to work./

Ah, I still got the touch~ He’s just perfect!

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"There's one I could say is dying to join, except he's already dead..." Percy looked at the wall he was standing next to now. Vaults there were so old some of the flaps were already crumbling. The one he ment had a coffin peaking through. The plate with mech's designation was all rusted through, which did rise a question about state the frame inside was in. Well, let's check anyhow~ Another coffin soon hit the floor.

"Grandpa here still got it too, I'd say..." he rose his optic to Drift, from a frame with almost-severed arm. "I suppose since we don't know his name we could actually call this one Swiss Knife..." he pointed to frame's forearms, Beneath the somewhat riddled plating there was a hidden socket with a few quite useful looking utilities. He looked around, wondering.

"It's kind of a bummer they had to lock everyone up so tightly. You can't really get a good look over the party guests to decide which ones you want..." he sighed, checking for some fresher dates, and then suddenly moving to the side. "Oh, and how about Punchride here?" he almost burst in laughter after reading the name.

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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/Drift huffed audibly and slid down the crate, landing on his knees and looking around the room carefully. The mortuary was a really big chamber shrouded in semi-darkness. The walls were adorned with hatches storing the fallen warriors inside, some covered by the simple metal coffins stacked one on another when they started running out of place./

::Clear.::

/Red grunts over the comm and straightens up, inching closer to the hatches sticking out of the walls. He tilts his helmet curiously reading the stamped into the little metal plates memorials for the fallen mechs./

::Here rests Rustsack, died protecting what is left of our home. Pfffff.:: /He snorts in amusement./ ::Surely he rusts in peace, or several pieces in fact. Judging by the date. Oooh~ This guy was called Twistermatcher! I’d shoot myself in the face too if I had a lame name like that. Poor guy~ I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a guy named Swiss Knife. Makes you wonder if he’d come in handy.::

::Helloooo? Anyone theeeere? Meh.:: /He knocks on one of the hatches playfully giggling to himself, but after getting no answer he takes a step back and turns around on his heel looking out for his partner./ ::So what? Ready to resurrect this party?::

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::Doesn't seem like much party to begin with, unless you know... you like the duty and honor crowd...:: Percy looked at another inscription and smirked. ::...well, at least we know for a fact it's gonna be an improvement." he shrugged. 

::Riiiight, can you see any volunteers~?:: 

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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/Drift let out a very frustrated sound before descending into the tunnel. This time he had more space to move around but it still seemed quite tight, it would be great to just get over it with this part of the mission. It was so ironic how such a little detail, like size, could take away the pleasure of sneaking into the enemy’s territory./

::How far is our exit?:: 

/He asked after a longer while, almost bumping into his partner who stopped, probably to check up the map again. Drift tried to adjust his optics more to the darkness but he could only see some basic black shapes, pitch black holes on their sides could suggest that they came across one of the tunnel’s intersections./

::Your aft is very lovely but a change of scenery would be nice.::

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::...which I would be tempted to take as a compliment except the way you keep bumping into all sides of this vent makes me think you see next to nothing anyway...:: darker bot smirked, shaking his head. ::We're almost there, if the data is still accurate...:: he much doubted anyone would bother to move corpses around, but hey. You never know.

From where they were it was just a small crawl down one of the side tunnels and they should be above a corridor right next to the first proper stop on their little adventure. He moved past the vent, scanners didn't pick up any signals of nearby activity, so he opened the crate carefully.

::After you~::

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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::Squeezing again?::

/He whined staying close to his partner with his optics stuck on the others back reflecting the white light of his optics. When it came to moving around in the dark Perceptor was better, mostly because of his fancy visor and Drift forgot where did he put in his goggles. Revision of his subspace sounded like a pretty good idea./

::I appreciate the fact that I can reach the stuff on the highest shelf right now, but I admire you for being able to squeeze through tunnels with a size like this.::

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::It's usually you who does the squeezing tho~:: Percy grinned. ::I only do when it's absolutely necessary.:: he stopped abruptly, examining something on the bottom of the vent in front of him.

::Alright, we're here...:: a damped metalic sound followed, and Percy carefully lowered himself to the maintenance tunnel. There wasn't much light here either, and the area looked more or less deserted. He looked up, waiting for Drift, and then carefully studying the surroundings. There were still some emergency lights on, and a few panels here and there suggested they could use it to narrow down their path choice. And, apart from the sounds they were making, it was completely silent.

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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"Fine, fine~ Ready…?" Percy steadied himself on his pedes, and pulled hard on Red’s. The mech didn’t even move an inch. The second time went a bit better, and in the third attempt actually ended with a complete success.

"Should I go, or you want to rethink your strategies and try again…?" dark mech cleaned his arm where other mercenary kicked him while trying to squeeze through the vent. He picked up Drift’s sword scabbards.

"There, see? Nothing’s broken…" 

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/With a ridiculous pout Drift snatched back his swords and assessed the vent entrance again. It’s true that without his scabbards it got more roomy. The only thing that was still in the way was his massive shoulders./

… Go first.

/He sighed and decided to try and compress his shoulder plating. The metal slowly slid back making his arms look smaller and slimmer. It was a pretty useful trick to use while wearing coats for whatever reason. Drift always thought that when you’re wearing a badass coat giant shoulders sticking out look retarded, and while this situation didn’t require any cool looking coats the trick surely came in handy when he could fit into the vent now without any bigger problem./

/Percy was long gone when Drift overcame the mundane task of squeezing through the black tunnel and got out, or more accurately, fell down at his face./

Oh, fraggit~! 

/He jumped back to his pedes and looked around in the dark. Spotting his partner’s magenta optics he came in closer, unsubspacing his scabbards to attach them back on his hips./

Coast clear?

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::As you can see~:: Drift's approach was only marked by the glow of his optics moving towards the other mercenary. He switched to com, as they already passed below the outer wall.

::There should be a maintenance tunnel running below. We'll probably have a bit more space once we move there and we can verify our plans if we find something working and connected to the mainframe... doesn't seem like there are any security sensors around here, so we can move freely for now...:: he hummed silently, checking the data again.

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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…I’m not sure we’re still talking about the same thing, Red…?

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My point still stands.

Now would you kindly get me out?

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"Fine, fine~ Ready...?" Percy steadied himself on his pedes, and pulled hard on Red's. The mech didn't even move an inch. The second time went a bit better, and in the third attempt actually ended with a complete success.

"Should I go, or you want to rethink your strategies and try again...?" dark mech cleaned his arm where other mercenary kicked him while trying to squeeze through the vent. He picked up Drift's sword scabbards.

"There, see? Nothing's broken..." 

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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You could be more gentle!

Hmpf. I think I can move… but it’s so tight!

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…and here I thought you preferred to play rough~

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...I'm not sure we're still talking about the same thing, Red...?

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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Please. Broke it? Who do you think you’re talking to? Everything is fine, just detached~

Try to move a bit now.

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You could be more gentle!

Hmpf. I think I can move… but it’s so tight!

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...and here I thought you preferred to play rough~

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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Strip of what, exactly, pray tell?

And I should probably remind you, you actually got to move to get your job done~

Hmmm… now that you mention it, you do have some…currently unnecessary weight on you. Let me try something…

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Huh? Try what?

O-Oi! Don’t touch that! I-I! Aaah!

…

Great. Now you broke it and you ruined the mood.

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Please. Broke it? Who do you think you're talking to? Everything is fine, just detached~

Try to move a bit now.

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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Not anywhere they haven’t been before… 

You know, you’re not getting anywhere if you just…   Scrap… Seriously Red, you’re acting like it’s your first time.

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Well, it feels funny!

What do you want me to do? Just stay still so you can strip me?

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Strip of what, exactly, pray tell?

And I should probably remind you, you actually got to move to get your job done~

Hmmm... now that you mention it, you do have some...currently unnecessary weight on you. Let me try something...

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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"Well… you did get awfully big…

…ouch. Stop that, I can’t help you when you wiggle like that!”

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It’s not my fault that y-!!

H-hey! Where are you putting those hands? You know you could always ask if you wanted to get there so much! 

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Not anywhere they haven't been before... 

You know, you're not getting anywhere if you just...   Scrap... Seriously Red, you're acting like it's your first time.

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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/Right, that’s how they always did it. Drift was on the front while Perceptor covered their backs. It was a natural course of action until…/

Errr…. Percy?

….

I think I’m stuck.

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"Well... you did get awfully big...

...ouch. Stop that, I can't help you when you wiggle like that!"

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

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/He followed his smaller partner staying close to the ground. Red paintjob wasn’t exactly the best for sneaking, especially with his current size. With so little cover if there were snipers on the patrol he would be like a giant walking practice target./

/They followed the well-trodden path going along the eastern wall of the base. The outer ring of the base was usually build to serve as an defense wall and armed with watchtowers. A little further there were halls for stuff that required lower security or easier access. Since they weren’t after any Intel or anything of that sort they didn’t have to go that much deeper into the facility where most of the remaining forces were stationed./

::Okay, I see our entrance.::

/Red stopped kneeling against the wall and starting to dig out the partially buried, medium sized vent leading underground. Looks like noone visited this part of the base for longer than they thought./

::You would think that they would care more about the security, pshhh. And later they are surprised that it’s so easy to find them!::

/He snarled looking with mild disgust at his dusty servos./

::Let’s hope it’s not falling apart as much as our Boss’ base does.::

/He added finishing digging and looking into the black hole./

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Percy was carefully checking the battlements, as Red found and dug up the vent.

::I suppose there's just not enough Cons to keep all of it secured... so why waste other resources...:: he looked back when his partner went still after uncovering the route. ::After you, then~:: he subspaced his rifle, checking for a more handy weapon for narrow tunnels.

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'Cause this is thriller, thriller night ~ ♪

/Only few cliks had passed before Drift landed in the previously set coordinates. There still was the risk that the Decepticon’s might notice them as they were landing, but there’s no fun without risk. Red nodded to Percy to go ahead and secure the perimeter around the ship while he stayed in the cockpit and checked everything twice. The system was on lockdown, camo working as intended and Percy was taking care of the additional security checks./

/Drift met with his partner outside, at the top of the mountain made of rocks and trash, towering over Calabi. At the bottom of the giant cavity there was the Decepticon base, or at least what was left of it (not like the Autobot HQ was in any better condition, both bases were worn out by the constant ambushes. Cons even moved their base around few times unlike Prime who wasn’t afraid of the enemy). Artificially created hills around the facility made it easier to defend and patrol, but given the last Decepticon activity maybe they shouldn’t worry about the latter too much. He looked at Perceptor and pulled out his binoculars to take a look at the area around the base himself./

::Any sight of the ducks?:: /He asked over their private commlink./ ::Coast seems way too clear.::

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::Judging by how annoyed Colonel Goodie-Two-Pedes was when asked about their numbers it's not that surprising...:: he hummed, lowering his rifle, after a short overlook through it's scope. There were no energy signatures nearby either.

::Let's just proceed according to plan...:: he carefully slid down the pile they were standing on, and then the next one. There were still traces of earlier fights here, whole area sporting some heavy burn marks. It had little to none strategical meaning, so repairs around here weren't anywhere near a priority list. Even parts of the standard perimeter were down, so there was hardly a need to cover their energy signatures. The system wouldn't pick them up anyway, not untill they got deeper inside.

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The Beaten Side of Town

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I snatched few crystals from the box~

/He hummed and got back up to look at the map. Percy as usual was always ready. From all possible ways the most convenient was marked with bright red./

I like it. We can hide Calabi behind the mountains of trash, with our new camo noone should spot it~ The vents will lead us directly into the facility.

/Just like Autobots, Decepticons didn’t have enough of resources and men to keep moving with their base all the time. With their universe being more than dead there was a high probability that the old Decepticon base that was still functional by the end of their most active phase of war was still operational and inhabited./

I’m guessing the mortuary should beeeee… mmmm… here.

/He tapped the map, pointing at set of large rooms in the outer circle of the base. The building was complex and they didn’t have the exact blueprints of it (their spies died before the map was complete, or so they were told), but what’s a better place for a graveyard? Drift couldn’t really understand why bury the corpses in the first place. What’s dead is dead, you might as well strip anything useful off the corpse and keep going; but in the end Drift was never good with sentiment./

With the current count of Cons on duty, we shouldn’t have too many problems with getting in~

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"Right~ we can double check that once we're in, I suppose. There is a guard post a bit further down from where we'd enter... and we need to pass it anyway" he yawned. "Let's get going. I'm getting somewhat bored... it's like we've done nothing except repairs since that outpost..." 

He hopped to the ramp, and walked towards ship's entrance. They were supplied well enough to dash off-world if they had to, after this. And there were enough outposts they could visit in acceptable proximity as well. Each more lively and interesting, than Cybertron at this point. 

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The Beaten Side of Town

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/It took some time and effort by the end of the solar cycle Calabi was sporting new, shiny black and red paintjob. Since it was Perceptor who won the paint battle, the main colour of the ship was black, with red and white ornaments adorning the wings and front of the ship. They tried to keep it simple and the final result was quite satisfying. Some might say that it was a bit crappy, but those who would say it out loud would be greeted with a bullet to the face. But that’s not relevant right now./

/Drift finished removing black dots off his finish and slumped down the large and comfy sofa they installed in the common area of the ship. He yawned looking over to Perceptor who was done with getting rid of some red splashed over his own, dark paintjob. Red smirked and threw his rag at his partner playfully./

Ready for some fun now? /He chuckled./ I suggest operation ‘Thriller Night’.

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"Thriller Night, huh? I'd like that..." Percy grinned, catching the rag and after a short while throwing it back at Red. "...it's got a feel of a good party to it, I think. And they'd use one." he went through his subspace contents, checking for everything he thought could be needed and few things he'd never thought they'd use, because they always proved a good idea to have in the end, before turning his optic back to his partner.

"How much of that zombie energon we've got left after what we gave Finny?" he was already checking possible routes they could take and advantages of each approach. "Hmmm there I think that would be the best one..." he stepped towards Red, showing him a map with some coordinates around the landing spot marked and described for their usefulness.