[knifefightscene]

y’all: here’s some alternatives to tumblr in case the site get merked on dec 17th

me:

[twitterlols]

[hashtagparksandrec]

[amandaexmachina-deactivated2018]

Donna for the new BBC Sherlock.

[moonblossom]

I would watch the hell out of that. Make it happen please.

[isitcoldenoughforpants]

Only if Tom is Watson

[instant-oatmeal]

yes please

[gaycism]

[captainsnoop-deactivated2020041]

donate to my kickstarter so i can build a time machine and

get julius caesar addicted to hentai

seduce cleopatra

“oh but how will you seduce cleopatra?” you might ask because you’re a moron. it’s simple: i’m 6′2″ and i’m fat. fatness was considered attractive back then because if you were fat, that meant you were wealthy enough to get fat. plus, 6′2″ is unreasonably gigantically tall in the BC times. 

so cleopatra will be like “a giant? AND he’s got stretch marks?” and she’ll instantly become infatuated with my rotund, hairy body 

then i will live in royalty for the rest of my days. kickstarter backers will have their names written in my tomb, baffling archaeologists for centuries to come. 

[theirisianprincess]

My favorite part of this is that OP didn’t feel the need to explain how he’d get Julius Caesar addicted to hentai.

[dankmemesreasonforliving]

[brainstatic]

Everyone’s like “those Germans have a word for everything” but English has a word for tricking someone into watching the music video for Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up.

[queenrinacat]

English has a lot more words created for very specific phenomena! It’s not just rick-rolling. Language is always evolving and it’s super interesting! Here’s a list of hyper-specific/untranslatable words in English.

[the-star-holder]

My expectations weren’t met, they were exceeded.

[shmadej-deactivated20180906]

no song will ever be as good as the chain by fleetwood mac ……….. like ………… yes bitch ………. break the silence …………. damn the dark ………… damn your lies ……………

[punishedtradchad]

[animatedtext]

[homoz]

[vedicardi]

[proletarianprincess]

i cannot believe this is happening already

[izzyzangwill]

[dankxsinatra]

[stuffingbuttsandstuff-deactivat]

Honestly, me too.

[red-makes-art]

This has the same energy of the dash cam video of the Russian dude just lowering his sun visor to block the light of the exploding meteor thing a couple years back.

[spacehunter-m]

fred likes to say tréasure

[sirobvious]

Did a nuclear fucking bomb go off in that second one

[moldlover]

i lov goofy boys thats so my type

[qcrip]

Gawrsh a-hyuck

[gothcostco]

the plot chickens

[gothcostco]

why do 70,000 people have as bad of a sense of humor as me

[weedle-testaburger]