i have wandered far.

in search of a place to call my own. ash. 25. they/them

[bailey-ash-blog]

OOC

aaah I've been mega busy with school but i’m looking to get active! hmu if you’d like a starter with ash

[requiem-on-water]

by Kyle Thompson

[magnus-olander-blog]

Magnus wasn’t the sort to go to parties, even before the end of the world as he knew it. Sure, he owned a casino, but whenever it hosted parties, he frequently sat in his office and avoided the party, simply responding to those who stumbled into his office accidentally.  It seemed that with the whole compound being used for the festivities, Magnus would simply have to endure the whole thing and elect himself to avoid those as much as possible. Guard duty was also an option, but he would likely let the infected in without much care if he were in charge. Standing at the table, covered with a variety of foods and drinks, the male filled his cup and looked to who was standing next to him. “What do you think this whole thing is distracting us from?” He questioned,having trouble buying that this party was simply as a celebration.

[bailey-ash-blog]

It is all lights and warmth and music. Ash hasn’t heard music in ages and ages. It’s loud. The sound of it reverberates inside of them, causes them to bob and sway in time with it. There’s food too, more than Ash has ever seen in one place in a very long time. They do not play pretend at being polite or civilized as they dig through the spread of food and drink, using their bare hands to shovel it into their mouth as quickly as possible. They only pause when a man speaks to them and even then it is only to look around and make sure that he is indeed speaking to them before they continue eating, unconcerned. “Something terrible probably,” they hum, filling their cup only to drain it a moment later, lines of bright red liquid dribbling down their chin, unnoticed. “Why else make it bright and loud and wonderful?” They look back at the bonfire and the many bodies silhouetted in its light. From this distance, Ash wouldn’t be able to tell human shadows from blooms. “I forgot that people keep secrets,” they hum filling their pockets with food. “If it is a lie at least it’s a nice one. At least it comes with food.”

[hermit-edmund-deactivated201904]

bailey-ash‌:

“Okay. I will,” they say, already drifting from their position the moment the gun is away. “Thank you for the advice. I’m not used to people. I don’t know how to talk to them anymore.”

They glance past the other man and into the kitchen. “Is there food in there? I am supposed to come back with food.” They pick their way through the broken glass and wood that litter the floor, feet settling gently in the dust, careful to be quiet upon request. “I’m not going to be loud anymore.” They promise, pressing their ear to the nearest door and listening for the telltale sound of something else on the other side. They doubt anything is nearby. If it was it would have come to the noise growling or clicking.

Edmund rolled his eyes at the stranger and moved to try to walk away, not giving the other any response. Edmund already figured they was useless and a weight, and seeing how they weren’t paired with each other the other could keep going on by themselves. Edmund moved to leave the home, wanting to continue scavenging.

[bcnfenwick]

Sniffing out alcohol had been his top priority. Sure, his priorities may be questionable at best, but if Micah was going to have to socialise was going to have to play nice - he might as well be drunk. After grabbing a bottle of whatever he could find, Micah decided on explore. Upon discovering the abandoned fair ground, Micah’s eyes had lit up. Perfect. Surely he wouldn’t be disturbed here.

He was wrong. Upon seeing another approach, he let out a groan, eyes rolling skyward as he took another swig from the bottle. “Are you just gonna stand there and stare, or are you going to join me?” He called out, sitting upright slightly.

[bailey-ash-blog]

“I was going to stand and stare but I will join you,” Ash says, wandering closer to the man. They eye the bottle in his hand. “If you came here to be alone I can go. I just wanted to look at the horses.” The porcelain horses remind Ash of something from very long ago. Their childhood is a warm, varnished thing and it is bright for a second in their mind. Their father had taken them to a place like this, lifted them onto the carousel with hands that had seemed larger than life. They’d been very happy then. They know they were. “Do you know if it runs?” They ask, running a finger along the painted muzzle of one of the horses.

[disceautdiscede]

Maybe silence adds to the pain and maybe pain adds to the sea and maybe the sea is only a reflection of a ruin today where the mind is unable to make out how things used to be for us: complete, with deities, a kind of order.

Sandra Simonds, from Lindos, Greece

[bailey-ash-blog]

hermit-edmund‌: 

There it was. The other was apart of Fortuna…and yet another lovely example of someone who should have died a long time ago. “Lead with that next time.” He stated, flicking his safety on and tucking the gun back in the holster. “Leave. You are loud and a risk to my safety.” It was clear that was the only ‘warning’ the stranger would get. 

“Okay. I will,” they say, already drifting from their position the moment the gun is away. “Thank you for the advice. I’m not used to people. I don’t know how to talk to them anymore.”

They glance past the other man and into the kitchen. “Is there food in there? I am supposed to come back with food.” They pick their way through the broken glass and wood that litter the floor, feet settling gently in the dust, careful to be quiet upon request. “I’m not going to be loud anymore.” They promise, pressing their ear to the nearest door and listening for the telltale sound of something else on the other side. They doubt anything is nearby. If it was it would have come to the noise growling or clicking.

[bailey-ash-blog]

hermit-edmund‌:

“You will die where I say you will.” he growled, eyes dark and dangerous. “Last chance, kid. Who are you, why are you here, and who is with you.” If the other didnt answer, Edmund would put a bullet between their eyes.

“Ash Bailey,” they say slowly, picking at the frayed end of their shirt. “I’m alone. I wanted to know what happened to the person who lived here oh...and to find food,” they say, finally remembering why they’d been sent out in the first place. “Fifteen seconds have passed already,” they nod towards the gun. “You haven’t shot me yet. If you do can you tell the man at the Fortuna gate that I will not be coming back?

[bailey-ash-blog]

hermit-edmund‌: 

“Ten seconds.” He stated, almost interrupting the other, having yet to hear a reason why the other wasn’t a threat. He didn’t know if this person was apart of the camp or not, or they were just some stranger…or someone who truly was a threat.

They blink at the man and his gun. He is like a puzzle that Ash is very clearly failing to solve. They sigh. “Can I at least die in the sun?” They ask, glancing at the light that filters in through the nearest window.

[bailey-ash-blog]

hermit-edmund‌:

Edmund didnt lower his gun as the other looked at him with wide eyes and an almost sense of wonder. “Yes.” He stated rather bluntly. He had no idea who the other was, the other thinking he had gone out scouting by himself. “I do not know you and from what I can tell you intentionally made noise, therefore are a danger to me. You have 15 seconds to tell me why I shouldnt kill you.”

Ash hums for a moment, tugging gently at a lock of their hair. “I didn’t mean to put you in danger I didn’t know you were here. You’re very quiet. Congratulations.” They’re still not quite used to the idea of people being around and in some way being as responsible for them as they are for themself. They motion at the debris surrounding them. “I wanted to see what it would be like when it all came crashing to the ground. I’m sorry. If I’d known you were here I would have waited.”

[bailey-ash-blog]

STATS. Name: Ash Bailey Age: 25 Pronouns: they/them Hometown: Bend, Oregon Weapons of choice: Knives, Bow & Arrow, Melee MTBI: ENFP-A Enneagram: Type 2 - The Helper Hogwarts House: Gryffindor Moral...

created an about page!

[bailey-ash-blog]

Ash walks. They choose no destination in particular when they start. They only know that they want to be moving. It hasn’t been long since their arrival in Fortuna and they’re still not used to lingering in one place for very long. If they stop moving for too long, they’re afraid they’ll forget what it was like to move at all. So they walk until the sun climbs high in the sky and hollow ache in their stomach tells them its about time they sought out something to eat, which would be a simple task if they had any idea where they were.

They approach the closest man to them and attempt an awkward wave. The gesture is a little too fast and a little too robotic to appear natural. “I am Ash. I don’t know where they keep the food yet. Do you?” @jc-castillo

[hermit-edmund-deactivated201904]

Edmund heard a crash and a bang of something falling in the room over to him. Instincts took over and as he twisted around from where he was raiding the abandoned house’s kitchen. In one fluid motion he pulled his gun and aimed it at the other, finger on the trigger and safety off as his dark eyes cut into them.

@xxtonyrichardsxx, @bailey-ash

[bailey-ash-blog]

Someone lived in this house. Someone was afraid. They piled things in front of the door to keep the blooms out and their work speaks only of panic and fear. It’s haphazard sculpture and Ash knows just by looking at it that if they remove a single piece the rest will topple to the ground.

It makes a glorious sound when it falls. For a moment it’s all crashing and chaos and the clipped, metallic sound of a manual safety flicking off. Blooms do not carry guns. Ash turns towards the sound eyeing the man and the gun in his hand with the same wide-eyed interest that had absorbed them while looking over the barricade. “Hello,” they say, then, “don’t worry. I am hungry but I won’t eat you.” They stand calmly, not moving to get out of the way as they continue to examine the man. “Are you going to shoot me with that?”

[frommylimitedtravels]

High tide reflections on a cold winter’s day.

[jrdnfshr-deactivated20210415]

It had only been a few days since Joan was allowed outside of quarantine and she had been looking forward to get to see what this place was all about. She knew it would take a while to get used to being in here, having been on the outside for so long, but it was a good feeling to know that she didn’t have to worry about infected creeping up on her or where she would spend the next night. It was true that she barely slept anymore, but maybe here, she could change that habit. Although, part of her didn’t trust easy and she knew she would keep sleeping with both eyes open. Joan eventually approached the Community Garden, where she noticed a good amount of people were, she guessed she should start getting to know people, make connections. “Nice place you got here.” She said as she looked around with a smile.

[bailey-ash-blog]

They’ve been walking since the sun had risen. It is rare thing, to be able to walk in the light without caution. Ash is used to moving in the dark by the wane light of the moon. They still finds themself on alert at every movement in the corner of their eye and every far off sound. They do not mind the constant interruptions that break the serenity of the garden into shards. It is a useful affliction, the instinct for caution that lives inside of them. It is better to cultivate it here inside of safety of the walls in this place that full of humans. 

They are not sure how alert to be when a person detaches themself from the background and approaches them to speak. Their face is cut apart by the curved slash of their mouth and Ash knows that they used to know what it meant when a face looked like that but it has been so long since they’ve seen a face up close that they’ve forgotten. Their hands flutter uncomfortably at their sides. “It is nice. It is not mine. Are you also new here?”

[requiem-on-water]

Into the forest I go, to lose my mind and find my soul.

John Muir

[bailey-ash-blog]

AGE: 25 GENDER IDENTITY: nonbinary (they/them) OCCUPATION: former artist

“Hello. Your 48 hour mandatory quarantine is now over. Before letting you into the populace I need you to answer a few questions. Please state your full name, date of birth?”

“Ash Bailey. June Thirtieth.”

“Thank you. In the last 48 hours have you experienced Infected like symptoms?”

“If I were blooming I would have sheered myself long ago.”

“Are there any ailments, disabilities, mental illnesses, or medical conditions that we should be made aware of?”

“I think I was different once. But that was a very long time ago before everything began to crack and fall apart. I’ve been along for a very long time, walking. I do not think it made me better.”

“Can you give us a little background on yourself. Your family life, work ethic. What kind of person are you?”

“I had a family once. We lived in a yellow house all of us together. I loved them I think. I wanted to save them but I was not strong enough. I didn’t know there would be flowers growing inside of them that I could not see. I didn’t know that they’d stop being my family. I do not know how to be with people anymore but I think that I miss them. I think that living without them is not really like living at all. This place is like waking up from a dream I did not know I was having. I would like to stay here. I will work hard.”

“Can you list three skills that you are proficient in?”

“I know how to be very quiet and stay out of sight. I know how to look for things that are not easily seen. I know how use my hands to make and break things.”

“Excellent. Now, three skills that you are not proficient in.”

“I was never good at making food taste good and I think that I forgot how to talk to people while I was alone and numbers are slippery for me. I cannot hold onto them very tightly.”

“Alright, and last question. If you had to, would you be able to kill someone you knew if they became infected?”

“I am capable. No one should live as a flower instead of a human, always wilting and hungry. I will end their suffering if it is necessary.”