𝓫𝓪𝓶𝓫𝓲

she/they • 17

[bamboozledbunny]

𝒷𝑜𝑜𝓀 𝓇𝒶𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓇𝑒𝓋𝒾𝑒𝓌𝓈

[bamboozledbunny]

I literally feel like I can’t pick The Long Game back up right now because I know what’s about to happen.

I am fully aware that it ends happy, I’m just not ready to have to push through the chaos to get to it yet.

Also I don’t wanna finish the book cause then I have to wait for Unrivaled to come out and that’s boring 😑

[bamboozledbunny]

Hope everyone has a happy, safe pride month!!!!

[bamboozledbunny]

As much as I love Jacob and Bella’s relationship, the switch-up in Eclipse pmo so much.

Like, Bella has fully chosen Edward and is engaged to him. Then, the minute Jacob finally decides to get over Bella, he manipulates her into kissing him because she doesn’t want to lose him. And all of the sudden she has some sort of deep, romantic love for him because they kissed.

It literally makes no sense.

I swear Stephenie Meyer just wanted to keep them close and apparently the only way to do that was to have the two be in love, but not in love enough to disrupt Edward’s relationship with Bella.

[cottonginandjuice]

I'm watching the Twilight movies for the first time (never read the books, didn't interest me as a teen.)

The manufactured love triangle in Eclipse also bothered me. I'd say, I felt Bella was manipulating Jacob not the other way around. He was actually gonna leave. She kissed him to make him stay, even though she doesn't want him. Thats how it looked to me.

[bamboozledbunny]

True true true. It was a bad look on both sides.

I think I just focus on Jacob’s manipulation more because he pisses me off so much in Eclipse that I forget how awful Bella was to him. And boy was she terrible to him.

[hoahoahoahoahoa]

The debate over whether Bella’s depression in New Moon was reasonable or not has always been wild to me.

First of all, I’m sorry but if I had a dream that I wanted as badly as Bella wanted hers, had it so close, and had it ripped away so suddenly (being told it’s my fault) I too would have fallen into a severe depression. That sucks. Having this otherworldly experience, having the reasonable belief you could live a fantasy of being young with your beautiful lover for eternity, only to be unceremoniously dumped back into the real world? That sucks!!!!!! Didn’t Doctor Who do a whole thing about post-adventure depression in companions?

Also, much more importantly: depression doesn’t need to be justified. It’s not always reasonable. Sometimes depression just happens for reasons that make little to no sense.

So when the protagonist of a love story falls into depression when her love interest leaves her, I think “yeah, no shit”

[bamboozledbunny]

Literally. I swear Bella just gets dogged on because she’s a teenager shaving normal teenage experiences.

Yeah she fell head over heels for a hot guy after only knowing him for a few days, that’s just what happens when you’re 17.

And don’t get me started on her depression.

Bella is established as temperamental in Twilight. She’s quick to anger, to soften, to lust. So yeah, she’s also gonna be quick to fall into depression when the boy she’s “unrevocably in love with” after a date and a half, leaves her.

Again, she’s seventeen.

[bamboozledbunny]

As much as I love Jacob and Bella’s relationship, the switch-up in Eclipse pmo so much.

Like, Bella has fully chosen Edward and is engaged to him. Then, the minute Jacob finally decides to get over Bella, he manipulates her into kissing him because she doesn’t want to lose him. And all of the sudden she has some sort of deep, romantic love for him because they kissed.

It literally makes no sense.

I swear Stephenie Meyer just wanted to keep them close and apparently the only way to do that was to have the two be in love, but not in love enough to disrupt Edward’s relationship with Bella.

[bamboozledbunny]

I honestly have never seen myself in a character more than Ilya in the early chapters of The Long Game.

The depression mixed with severe yearning for something you can’t have quite yet. That’s me on my worst days. While I haven’t lost a parent, I know the literal heart wrenching pain of feeling isolated and lonely. Of being in a new place because of someone else and not being able to find comfort in that person. It’s really fucking hard.

I wish I had the ability to see a therapist when I get bad like that, because even though it’s difficult to verbalize pain it’s also insanely freeing. For now I’ll just have to journal, but I now have Ilya to, I guess, mirror and strive to be like.