i’m very self aware. which unfortunately hasn’t solved anything

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i’m very self aware. which unfortunately hasn’t solved anything
"slut era" i say as i rot and decay in my bedroom and watch the years pass me by as i miss out on core experiences other people my age are having while i think about the past
Really gross of me to desire attention, disgusting honestly.
What doesn’t kill you makes you passively suicidal 24/7
nobody teaches you how to go about life when you didn’t expect to be alive this long
as my final act of love, I will swallow every "please stay" and turn it into silence so you don't feel trapped by my ache
sometimes i wonder if i'll ever enjoy being alive