Angsty little Barantos where everything is going so well, it feels too good to be true. And those negative voices in the back of Trinity's mind, well, they're reminding her of that constantly. It's a constant battle, and she is not god's strongest soldier. All good things must end, and self-sabotage is the only way to control how much you get damaged.
Baran and Kaveh went out of town for his judo tournament. He won, and they arrive back in Pittsburgh bright and early the next day. He can't wait to see Trinity and tell her all about it. Baran is eager to see her too. Trinity had been out of sorts, pulling away, lost in the past the week before they left, and she knows Trinity had a stressful shift while she was gone.
They arrive, arms laden with brunch, just as Dennis returns from a night shift that had clearly been slammed. He lets them in, chatting patiently with Kaveh as she goes to wake Trinity. She opens the bedroom door, ready to gently wake her.
The bodies in the bed stir, as Baran stands, taking in the scene. Kaveh and Dennis' chatter drifts down the hall and the tangled bodies jerk upright.
She's already moving, back down the hall, back to the kitchen, where Dennis immediately picks up that something isn't right. He stops unloading the bags of food, as she puts on a brave and tells Kaveh that Trinity isn't feeling well, so they'll have to tell her about judo another time. He wants to see her, can Maman make her better? No, Kaveh, she already has a doctor with her. Dennis' eyebrows shoot to the ceiling, his jaw set in disappointed understanding.
Trinity stumbles out of her room, clothes thrown on. Someone (maybe it's Garcia) follows behind, loose limbed compared to Trinity's frantic apologies. Kaveh looks at this intruder, helping herself to the pancake bites they'd got, and tells her he doesn't like her. Baran ushers him away, ignoring Trinity's pleas. Dennis walks them out, makes sure the brunch is secure on the back seat next to Kaveh's booster. Tells her to drive safe.
She keeps phone on Do Not Disturb. Everywhere she looks in the house is a reminder, the drawer full of Trinity's clothes, the haphazardly folded blanket on the back of the couch. She cries herself to sleep for thinking she could have something good, something real.
At work, Dennis runs interference. She goes to HR first thing and informs them that for the time being, she recommends the usual focus on keeping Trinity out of her direct supervision, should be upped. It's pre-emptive, and unneeded. Trinity switches to night shift as soon as she's able. Garcia (if it was her, prompt author is not trying to villainise her but alas she makes for a convenient pull for this situation) is insufferable, making the trip down to grace The Pitt with her presence, lingering longer than she has to 'to keep an eye on her patients'. Everyone knows something happened, even if they don't know what.
'She's gloating,' Baran murmurs, eyes locked on the board, Dennis at her elbow. The empty space on her otherside is painful, is ignored. 'How is she?' She can't help it. It hurts, but she can't not care. Knows that it didn’t happen because Trinity didn't care, doesn't care.
The silence before Dennis speaks says it all. 'Struggling. I'm keeping an eye on her. She made an appointment with a therapist. Cancelled it. Made another. I don't know why she did it, but I don't think it was meant to be- I think she's punishing herself. Not just now. I mean, that's what it was for her. Not-'
'I understand,' she says, softly. Because she does. She knows Trinity, loves Trinity, spends too much time worrying about her, wondering if she is okay or if she needs help, the urgent kind, if Garcia knows how to hold Trinity through a panic attack, if she even cares at all.
But right now, Baran just can't bring herself to be the one there for her.
(And cause I'm a slut for omegaverse shenanigans, twist where they were unmated but both clearly wanting it, that commitment is what scared Trinity, spurred on the bad thoughts. She didn’t deserve Baran, couldn’t care for an omega properly, she couldn’t look after herself. And then, gasp, what a twist, in those bleak, lonely weeks afterwards, Baran realises she's pregnant (a classic trope for a reason) and now has a time crunch on learning to move past the betrayal. Emotionally distant hook-ups where Baran is so pent-up and her body won't accept anything but Trinity's touch, even as her heart can't stand the tender lovemaking, demands something rougher, harsher. Curls up in bed, alone, afterwards and inhales the scent of Trinity on the bedsheets, the t-shirt she kept when she boxed up Trinity's things, that she keeps under the pillow for those moments she needs to feel calm.)