Andrew, who has been leaning against a wall near the study room door for the last half hour, looks up from his drink and across the room. Neil lounges on the floor, between Matt’s knees where he sits on a sofa. Neil’s cheeks are pink from the beer in his hand, but his eyes are still sharp and amused as he looks back at Allison.
“Truth,” Neil answers.
Andrew can’t see Allison, but her face must do something that puts a hint of a competitive edge in Neil’s expression.
“What’s your favorite thing about Andrew?” Allison asks. “And don’t give me some bullshit about feelings. I’m talking physical. What’s Neil Josten’s type?”
Neil’s gaze slides over to Andrew, but Andrew only lifts an eyebrow in challenge. He’s expecting something smug or teasing in return, a smirk or a shit-eating grin. Instead, Andrew’s stomach drops when Neil’s face turns soft and contemplative.
Shit, Andrew thinks. He should’ve known better. He should’ve left thirty minutes ago. He shouldn’t have come to the basement at all.
“His hair,” Neil finally decides, voice quiet and earnest. “It’s soft.”
It was also the first ground that Andrew ceded, in the early days of whatever they were back then — when Andrew pulled Neil’s flexing hands from his pockets and gave him something to hold onto. “This is enough,” Neil had murmured the following summer, returning his fingers to Andrew’s hair and tugging gently at the strands. Andrew had tried to give him more that night, but he’d quickly changed his mind, sending Neil’s hands back to a place that felt safe. “Whatever you can do. It’s enough.”
“God, you’re boring,” Allison complains.
“I think it’s sweet,” Renee says.
“Me too,” Matt adds, patting the top of Neil’s head.
“Of course you do,” Allison says. “You’re both hopeless romantics. Andrew, truth or dare? Maybe you can spice this up.”
Andrew only holds up a middle finger in her direction, eyes still on Neil.
“You know Andrew has the same hair as Aaron, right?” Dan pipes up.
Aaron makes a choked sound somewhere to Andrew’s left, and Andrew loses Neil’s attention as he turns to Dan, lip curling in disgust.
Andrew should feel thankful for the disruption of Neil’s raw stare. He should feel cold and exposed. He should want to leave. But none of that is true. So instead, Andrew stands against the wall as the night carries on around him. It’s a small amount of ground that he cedes to the rest of the team. But it is enough.
“What’s your favorite thing about Andrew?” Allison asks. “And don’t give me some bullshit about feelings. I’m talking physical. What’s Neil Josten’s type?”
Neil looks over to Andrew. He's been standing by the door for a while now, though he hasn't gotten sick of them enough to leave quite yet. Neil likes when Andrew is here, even when he hangs in the corners like a tortured spirit bound to purgatory. He likes having Andrew to look over to when the moment is too loud, or when his drink is too strong, or when he just wants to. (That last one is the most frequent.)
Andrew claims he only comes to these things for Neil. (Well, he doesn't actually say that, either. But it's in the subtext of his threats and insults and complaints.) Neil doesn't think that's true. He's never been able to get Andrew to do anything he doesn't truly want to do.
Andrew raises an eyebrow expectantly, and right, Neil is playing a game. (Maybe his drink really is a little strong.)
Andrew.
Physical.
The truth is that everything Neil likes about Andrew's body is linked to the fact that it's Andrew's body. What gets Neil's blood pumping and lungs aching isn't Andrew's broad shoulders or strong arms or fleshy thighs. (Well, maybe it's those things a little bit. They're very good things.) It's the fact that Andrew gives Neil any access to his body at all. That he wants Neil to touch him. That he lets Neil in. That he wants Neil, no matter how much he threatens and insults and complains.
Neil didn't know he wanted to kiss Andrew until they were kissing. He didn't know how badly he wanted to hold him until Andrew lifted Neil's hands to his hair.
"His hair," Neil says. It's as good of an answer as any, especially in front of all these gossip vultures. "It's soft."
The others react as boisterously as they do to any morsel of a detail Neil gives them about his personal life. Andrew's blank expression doesn't change, but his eyes are locked on Neil's. Neil wonders what Andrew expected him to say. He wonders if Andrew understands his answer. From the intensity of Andrew's gaze, Neil think he might.
Allison asks Andrew the same question, and Neil knows he won't answer, but now he's wondering what Andrew would say. If Andrew is still here when this game wraps up, he'll lead Andrew to the roof, bury his hands in that soft hair, and see if Andrew will tell him. Truth for truth. Almost like old times.
“You know Andrew has the same hair as Aaron, right?” Dan asks, and Neil's hazy concentration is broken as he whips his head toward her. She smirks, pleased to be under his skin. Betrayal.
"And Matt's hair is the same as his mother's," Neil snaps back. "Are we just now understanding how genes work?"
"If you're implying that I'm also attracted to Randy, then I'll admit that Mama Boyd is hot as hell."
Behind him on the sofa, Matt groans and flicks Neil's ear.
Later, when the intervals between truths and dares have stretched too long to constitute an active game, Neil stands up on wobbly legs. Andrew is still by the door, still watching the madness unfold from a distance. His eyes flick to Neil when he steps in front of him.
"Roof?" Neil asks, quiet enough for only Andrew to hear.
Later, as the wind whips away the smoke from their cigarettes and cools Neil's booze-flushed cheeks, Andrew answers, "I hate every part of you, remember?"
Even later, when Neil's back is pressed to the rough concrete, he tangles his fingers into Andrew's hair and smiles. Andrew huffs in annoyance, then covers Neil's mouth with a warm palm and leans in close.
if the twins grew up together do you think andrew would’ve torn aarons food into little pieces as toddlers because that’s how he feels comfortable eating his food and he thought he would help his brother too and then aaron sees and starts fucking sobbing because why is this evil ass fucking baby tearing apart his food and andrew starts getting angry cause like why isn’t he appreciating it why is he crying
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