Emma

[alien]

[dankmemesreasonforliving]

[bby-blu-eyes]

[fortunatemind]

Sometimes you just need to listen to the same song for an entire afternoon 

[insectic-a]

[tackled]

[knowing]

[crewdlydrawn-deactivated2022072]

[factly]

[wavejumper]

[pururin]

[erics-idle]

[amesantiago]

#my last two brain cells

[leekpotatosoup]

[gifcraft]

[basic-banshee]

I keep using my girlfriend with unusual work hours to get out of coworker interactions and happy hours and hanging out.

But now the company holiday party is upon us.

And I’ve been lying about the girlfriend.

I suddenly really empathise with the characters in Hallmark Christmas movies.

[basic-banshee]

I like that people have two reactions to this post.

Reasonable: “just say she couldn’t make it!”

Chaotic: FAKE DATING AU

Well, which one is it going to be?

[basic-banshee]

And so it begins

having the DMV area Craigslist bookmarked has never come in handy before but now

[basic-banshee]

Update, Craigslist has flagged my post as inappropriate.

[basic-banshee]

Apparently you can’t solicit a date as a “gig”

I now see my mistake

[basic-banshee]

Update: a date has been acquired. This is true lesbian solidarity in action.

[justluckyiguess]

My wife has now read this and wonders how baby gays are even meeting and mating

[basic-banshee]

Can confirm I am meeting and mating just fine 😂

[basic-banshee]

By the way I’m in a relationship with this woman now

[cooliopumpkin]

[basic-banshee]

This is the feedback I’ve been looking for

The ending is always the same but damn I never get tired of it

[aquilacalvitium]

That backfired

[brujabby]

let’s talk about the universe and make out