Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
#extradirty
Color Me Curious
KIROKAZE
todays bird
noise dept.
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Monterey Bay Aquarium
oozey mess
YOU ARE THE REASON
Product Placement
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
official daine visual archive
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Cookie Run:Kingdom Official!
Sade Olutola
if i look back, i am lost
EXPECTATIONS
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Origami Around
seen from United States
seen from Bangladesh
seen from South Africa
seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from Malaysia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Germany
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seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
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seen from Sweden
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@be-gay-take-naps
christmas eve what about christmas adam
happy christmas adam to all men’s rights activists
Please stop pestering us with things like this. This has nothing to do with men fighting for their rights. Eve is short for ‘evening’. Please don’t turn activism into a joke. Thanks.
Someone isn’t having a good christmas adam
Christmas Adam: December 23rd. Comes before Christmas Eve and is generally unsatisfying.
Happy Christmas Adam everyone
skeletons
THIS IS WHAT I WANT ON NY HALOWEEN DASH OMG
I’ll never stop reblogging this
I told myself I’d wait until October to start putting halloween stuff on my blog. I’m a dirty liar.
do Ents reproduce by sexual intercourse or by pollination
But if they reproduce through pollination how can they be sure they no longer reproduce? Maybe they’re anemophilous and are wind-pollinated and if they stand in a strong enough breeze an Entwife, somewhere, conceives an Entseed.
oh my god maybe the Entwives were bees
you are a mad genius
Ok, so, we have a few options:
1.) Ents reproduce exclusively through sexual intercourse, or something close to it
OR
2.) Ents reproduce via pollination and...
a.) are dioecious, with Ents producing only male flowers and Entwives producing only female flowers, and pollinated either by wind or by animals (or by hand?)
b.) have bisexual flowers, but which are so specialized that they can exclusively be pollinated by one specific species of pollinator...
The Entwives left the forest so long ago that the Ents no longer remember what they looked like. Treebeard says the Shire sounds like the sort of place they would have loved, with its gardens and flowers and agriculture. Hobbits have folklore of giant bees, named after bumblebees. Certain flowers only release pollen to “buzz pollinators”, like bumblebees.
Could it be that the Ents—who notoriously do everything slowly—failed to evolve quickly enough to compete with agricultural crops for the time and attention of their only pollinator species? Did the Entwives dump the Ents to evolve into regular bees faster than the Ents could even consciously process? DOES SAM GAMGEE THE GARDENER’S BOY KEEP ENTWIVES?!
I think we’ve done it. I think we’ve cracked the code. (Shut the fuck up, Jirt, no one asked you.)
It’s only in the movies that the Ents cannot remember the Ent wives. In the books they’ve described as having golden hair, red cheeks, and eyes like the Ents. Meaning the Entwives probably resembled the ents in appearance.
Likewise in the books the Ents were basically tree like giants instead of giant trees. As seen below
Peter Jackson reimagined the Ents as being giant trees instead of tree like giants so returning to the original question I propose a compromise:
Treebeard from the movies reproduces through pollination by the Ent Wives who are giant bees.
Treebeard from the books fucks. 
“Golden hair”?
“Red (butt) cheeks”?
Sounds like a rusty patched bumblebee to me.
i learned that actor Danny Trejo has the most on-screen deaths of anyone in Hollywood history, with 65. Followed by Christopher Lee (60), Lance Henriksen (51), Vincent Price (41), Dennis Hopper (41), Boris Karloff (41), and John Hurt (39). (x)
Yet poor Sean Bean is stuck with the reputation for dying in every movie. Unfair.
Give him time, he still has many years of dying yet to come.
Also there’s the question of density vs quantity. If you make a hundred movies and die in 50, and someone else makes 30 movies and dies in 30, the first one has died more, but the second one has died more often per movie.
It’s the DPM ratio that really counts, IMO.
65/402 16% Danny Trejo 60/282 21% Christopher Lee 51/259 20% Lance Henriksen 41/211 19% Vincent Price 41/205 20% Dennis Hopper 41/204 20% Boris Karloff 39/209 19% John Hurt 33/117 28% Sean Bean
I’m so proud of the statistical side of tumblr for coming through on this.
It’s funny how science fiction universes so often treat humans as a boring, default everyman species or even the weakest and dumbest.
I want to see a sci fi universe where we’re actually considered one of the more hideous and terrifying species.
How do we know our saliva and skin oils wouldn’t be ultra-corrosive to most other sapient races? What if we actually have the strongest vocal chords and can paralyze or kill the inhabitants of other worlds just by screaming at them? What if most sentient life in the universe turns out to be vegetable-like and lives in fear of us rare “animal” races who can move so quickly and chew shit up with our teeth?
Like that old story “they’re made of meat,” only we’re scarier.
More seriously, humans do have a number of advantages even among Terrestrial life. Our endurance, shock resistance, and ability to recover from injury is absurdly high compared to almost any other animal. We often use the phrase “healthy as a horse” to connote heartiness - but compared to a human, a horse is as fragile as spun glass. There’s mounting evidence that our primitive ancestors would hunt large prey simply by following it at a walking pace, without sleep or rest, until it died of exhaustion; it’s called pursuit predation. Basically, we’re the Terminator.
(The only other animal that can sort of keep up with us? Dogs. That’s why we use them for hunting. And even then, it’s only “sort of”.)
Now extrapolate that to a galaxy in which most sapient life did not evolve from hyper-specialised pursuit predators:
Our strength and speed is nothing to write home about, but we don’t need to overpower or outrun you. We just need to outlast you - and by any other species’ standards, we just plain don’t get tired.
Where a simple broken leg will cause most species to go into shock and die, we can recover from virtually any injury that’s not immediately fatal. Even traumatic dismemberment isn’t necessarily a career-ending injury for a human.
We heal from injuries with extreme rapidity, recovering in weeks from wounds that would take others months or years to heal. The results aren’t pretty - humans have hyperactive scar tissue, among our other survival-oriented traits - but they’re highly functional.
Speaking of scarring, look at our medical science. We developed surgery centuries before developing even the most rudimentary anesthetics or life support. In extermis, humans have been known to perform surgery on themselves - and survive. Thanks to our extreme heartiness, we regard as routine medical procedures what most other species would regard as inventive forms of murder. We even perform radical surgery on ourselves for purely cosmetic reasons.
In essence, we’d be Space Orcs.
Our jaws have too many TEETH in them, so we developed a way to WELD METAL TO OUR TEETH and FORCE THE BONES IN OUR JAW to restructure over the course of years to fit them back into shape, and then we continue to wear metal in out mouths to keep them in place.
We formed cohabitative relationships with tiny mammals and insects we keep at bay from bothering us by death, often using little analouge traps.
And by god, we will eat anything.
We use borderline toxic peppers to season our food.
We expose ourselves to potentially lethal solar radiation in the pursuit of darkening our skin.
We risk hearing loss for the opportunity to see our favorite musicians live.
We have a game where two people get into an enclosed area and hit each other until time runs out/one of them pass out
We willingly jump out of planes with only a flimsy piece of cloth to prevent us from splattering against the ground.
Our response to natural disasters is to just rebuild our buildings in the exact same places.
We climb mountains and risk freezing to death for bragging rights
We invented dogs. We took our one time predators and completely domesticated them.
On a planet full of lions, tigers and bears, we managed to advance further and faster than any other species on the planet.
Klingons and Krogan and Orcs ain’t got shit on us
We drink ethanol (in concentrations high enough to be used as an effective as microbicide or a solvent!) for the express purpose of achieving blood toxicity and disrupting normal brain function… AS A RECREATIONAL ACTIVITY!
On the same subject, we also deliberately incinerate assorted substances and then inhale the particulate-heavy smoke and vapor resulting for the same effect. EVEN IN THE FACE OF SAID SUBSTANCES BEING CARCINOGENIC, BECAUSE WE JUST DON’T GIVE A FUCK.
Humans do not have biological castes. Kill their commander and another will take its place. Soldiers left alone on a planet will start farming and manufacturing to survive. Farmers and manufacturers will take up arms and kill you if pressed. Just because two humans look different doesn’t mean they cannot do each other’s jobs.
Breeding does not kill them. A single human can mate dozens or hundreds of times in a lifetime. They often do so as recreation. Xenobiology team six believes they do not have a mating season but this is too strange to be true.
Their appendages are not designed for hitting, so they developed special training to make them very good at hitting anyhow.
The proteins making up their bodies are toxic and cause prion disease. Do not touch anything humans have touched. Do not consume earth foods. Fire does not adequately remove this contamination.
Humans perceive sixteen times the colors we do. Do not hide in bushes or vines from humans. They can distinguish your pelt from the foliage with ease.
We tried venting waste gas into the tunnels to kill the humans when they attacked. Turns out they breathe it.
Everything on their planet came from a single biological strain. They developed comprehensive genetics BEFORE they developed space travel.
They lack radio receptors and cannot be brought into compliance with right-thought simply by broadcasting to them. Even after we learned how to translate it into sound-waves one of their hatchlings drove the Great Authority mad by responding to every demand with a single question: “Why?”
#an individual human being is actually a microbiome in its own right—you are dealing with a legion each time you approach them #they carry pathological agents inside their deep tissues and this is advantageous to their health #one of the most widespread and resilient viruses on their planet is treated as mildly hazardous—even though it causes #massive disruption to the body’s homeostasis #(their young offspring endure multiple rhinovirus infections EACH YEAR yet they seem unperturbed by this) #they have developed such long lifespans that now their primary threat is their own body’s degeneration #humanity has literally figured out how to survive so long that their body gives out under them #and they are not satisfied with that #stupid willful vengeful survivalists who treat mortality like a challenge
I am speechless
Reblogging so I can reread in the morning
I think I’ve reblogged this before, but it’s well worth doing again.
This post is AWESOME. Nice to see it on my dash again in 2016.
Nice :)
Can’t wait for the inevitable updates when we finally nail the last hurdles of genetic engineering.
if anyone has the time to sign this petition that would be great!! it’s so disabled people can get married and keep their benefits!!
Petition Lori's Law
this article goes into more detail about how disabled people lose their benefits when they get married if you feel like reading about it!!
Discouraging disabled people from marrying, or worse, incentivizing them to divorce may not be the intent of Social Security rules, but it i
what if vampires are like mosquitoes and only the ladies drink blood
Pretty sure that would mean the fellas drink tree sap or something. Imagine running from a vampire thru the woods and passing her husband who's biting a tree real hard
Maple syrup vampire husband
Lightning McQueen is a cisformer
Ah, because he’s always a car.
Cisformers
Just what meets the eye
AND YET A TRACE OF THE TRUE SELF EXISTS IN THE FALSE SELF
this post is about plastic dinosaurs
put some respect on her name!
Rebecca Sugar is the GOAT! Steven Universe the Movie is one of the best animated films of the year and is the best animated musical of the year; on my momma herself!
I demand we all give it it's due as the magical boy anime masterpiece that it is.
steg was a good fusion made out of the father/son bond between Steven and Greg and he looks cool as hell I’ll protect him till my dying breath
recontextualizing fry and leela as an annoying but earnest twitch streamer and his inexplicably hot and intimidating girlfriend
no actually. recontextualizing fry and leela as an esports champion turned twitched streamer and her boyfriend who is just kind of there on stream sometimes and has his own emote
fry: [gets home from work and accidentally wanders into frame]
the chat: FRY 🍟🍟🍟🍟 [pog] 🍟🍟🍟 he’s back 🍟[pog]🍟[pog]🍟 WHAT IS THAAAAAAAT 🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟 mad lad 🍟 how was ur day fry 🍟🍟 FRY b3nd3r(mod): LEELA PUT A LOCK ON YOUR FUCKING DOOR 🍟🍟🍟 am i supposed to know who that is or [pog] [pog] 🍟 OH NO HE’S UGLY 🍟🍟🍟🍟 [b3nd3r has set the chat to subscribers-only]
op im deeply sorry but this post has been haunting me for weeks
yeah yeah yeah mortifying ordeal of being known and all that but sometimes a friend mentions something about you that you didn’t think was noticeable and it feels like your heart is being cradled in their hands
“we were lovers in a past life” trope but the current incarnations are enemy-to-lovers trope. when.
To be clear. I don’t want “our past love ended in betrayal and anger and now we hate each other.” I want “we died in love and in each other’s arms” but the current incarnations do NOT remember and they ARE trying their best to End the other one and these new sudden flashbacks to lovingly holding each other’s hands is EXTREMELY UPSETTING
