Here's to you, Meri

A guide and some tips to the best years of your life.

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Wrapped Up, October 31st 4:17 AM

It’s so easy to get caught up in the little things.  I think it gets easier as time goes on, but when things pile up, it’s definitely hard to manage sometimes.  College is a crazy and busy time, and there are times when responsibilities and school and social life gets SUPER overwhelming.  DON’T FORGET TO MAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF.  Decompress, watch Netflix, go for a run--ANYTHING.  I know it’s easier to do this as a freshman, but please don’t forget this when you are a junior.  You don’t want to look back on your year and realize you could’ve taken better care of yourself.  You only get one life and one body--you’re doing the best you can, and sometimes you can’t do everything.  This is a big realization that I’ve come to and I hope, if things ever get too tough, you will too.

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Daughters; 06.04.18 10:57 PM

I didn’t realize it at the time when I was your age, but we really only get our younger years to spend with our parents. I guess it’s because Pac and Mac were always over that I never thought about it any other way.   I never thought about how I’ll probably live far away from the family and I won’t have Mom and Dad as babysitters.  It’s the sad truth that I came to terms with this year.  We have already spent about 90% of the time that we will spend with them in our whole lives.  It’s hard to put that in perspective when you feel like they’re being so hard on you, or they make stupid rules, or you guys just aren’t getting along.  What I’m trying to say is, make the most of the time that you have with them while you have it.  Despite all of the fighting that you guys do, try to hang out with them and spend quality time together, because you never know when it’ll be the last time.

I know I didn’t have the best relationship with them during high school, but I hope since I’ve been gone it’s allowed you to build a stronger relationship with them.  It’s hard because you feel like you’ll never been on the same page with them.  Especially when you see all of these people our age who are so close with their parents and tell them everything--it’s definitely frustrating.  That doesn’t mean they don’t love us or care about us any less, it’s just the way our relationship with them is.  Every relationship is unique--some may seem perfect to others, and some may seem shitty.  Bottom line is, you will find imperfections and flaws in every relationship you encounter, but your parents will be there for you forever.  We’re lucky to have great parents that have guided us through life with good morals and attitudes.  Above all, they’ve always wanted what’s best for us.  Don’t lose sight of that, just because you may not have the bond that others have. What you have, they may lack.

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The Sound of Music; 05.14.18 11:01 PM

I saw this quote and it really struck me.  “Music is a total constant. That’s why we have such a strong visceral connection to it, you know? Because a song can take you back instantly to a moment, or a place, or even a person. No matter what else has changed in your or the world, that one song says the same, just like that moment.”  It is actually unreal how much music has been a constant in my life.  I can’t go a day without listening to it; it completely has shaped my life in an inconspicuous way.  Never stop trying to immerse yourself with music.  And don’t stop with all the genres that you usually listen to--expand and find new artists and songs that you like.  My friends introduced me to so many amazing artists and songs that are now my favorites.  Always keep an open ear to any kind of music (yes, even to country).  You may find that you actually like it!

I lean on music when I’m happy, sad, angry, bored, and everything in between.  I’m not sure what I would do without it...probably go insane.  If there are any cheap concerts near you, GO TO THEM.  Immerse yourself with the band beforehand and go, because concerts are amazing experiences, especially with friends.  They are 110% worth it and you’ll remember the experience for a lifetime.

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Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.”

Marthe Troly-Curtin (via purplebuddhaquotes)

This is SUCH an important quote, because it’s so easy to get caught up and stressed in college.  You think that you have so much work, and you sit there and you think about how much you have rather than actually doing it.  It causes way more anxiety and stress to do that then it does to actually sit down and finish.  However, there will be days where your heart just might not be in it.  You might’ve had a rough day.  Or a rough week.  The one thing you do know is that there is NOTHING you’d rather do less than this work. Here’s the secret; you don’t HAVE to do it.  If it’s not due that night or the next day, TAKE A BREAK.  Leave it for a later date when you are more focused and ready to tackle it.  Nobody is forcing you to sit down and do it, so go put your mind to something else.  Go for a run.  Hangout with friends.  DECOMPRESS.  It doesn’t have to be about school 24/7 all the time.  Sometimes you just need to take a breath, relax, and come back to it at another time.

[lovelysuggestions]

Kink: actual genuine human connection

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You will learn more than ever in college that human connection is the most important thing in life.  GPA and resumes isn’t usually what gets you a job--it’s people.  If you make a good first impression on someone, that can go a long way.  Never be afraid to step outside your comfort zone and introduce yourself to new people.  ESPECIALLY in your first year at college, you’ll want to meet as many people as you can.  I literally embarrassed myself so much by going upstairs on my floor and knocking on people’s doors to say hi.  It was a little uncomfortable, but I did it.  It also felt SUPER cliché, considering that’s what you think any typical freshman would do.  However, it makes sense.  Mostly everyone who goes to college just wants to meet new people--they just might be afraid to make the first step.

[poemswords]

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Never stop being kind to people.  Even if others try to tear you down; BE BIGGER THAN THEM.  I’ve never seen a mean person who is happy.  Let that sink in...if you spread negativity, you ARE negative yourself!  Kindness goes a long way--you never know what someone else is going through.  Take a step back, take a breath, and realize that everyone needs a little bit of kindness in their lives.

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Some Endings are New Beginnings; 5.11.18 9:33 PM

“Not everyone you lose is a loss.”  I remember saying this quote all the time in middle school and high school, and now looking back I know I was so foolish.  I was talking about lost friends over stupid petty fights and boys who were immature and dumb.  However, now in college, this quote resonates with me more than ever.  Losing someone is sad, whether it’s a friend or a significant other.  However, when that person leaves your life, ask yourself, “Am I better off without them?”  Usually, the answer is yes.  That person is now out of your life for a reason.  Maybe they were too toxic.  Maybe they didn’t have the same mindset as you.  It may hurt at first, but in the end, it will be okay.  You’ll look back and realize why that person exited your life.

Don’t be afraid to let people go who aren’t doing anything but letting you down.  You shouldn’t waste time trying to put up with someone who just doesn’t serve your purpose in life anymore.  Life is too short.  This lost person can make room for a new, more wonderful person to enter your life.  It’s hard to fathom in the town that we live in, but once you go to college, you will meet more kind, genuine, and kind-hearted people than you have ever seen.  Never be afraid to open up your heart and mind to anyone who will listen, but choose those people wisely.  The more you interact with people, the more you will be able to judge their true characters.  Choose wisely -J. Cole

[fatimamononoke]

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1DAAT; 3.14.18 1:01AM

You’re going to have bad days.  Although you think college is the best thing that will ever happen to you, it’s no walk in the park.  I know how excited you are and I absolutely cannot wait for you to come, but that doesn’t mean the stresses of high school end.

I just want you to be able to accept the bad days--to realize that it’s okay to have them.  Don’t be discouraged and condemn yourself when you’re feeling down and think, “Ugh, I shouldn’t be feeling this way, I should be happy,” because you don’t always have to be.  I think that’s a common misconception, especially in the environment that we’ve been blessed to live in...that you can never be upset, because other people have it so much worse than we do.

IT IS NORMAL TO FEEL NOT OKAY SOMETIMES. Repeat it until it resonates with you, because I always want you to know that your feelings are validated.  Shit happens, and life isn’t always great just because we are more fortunate than others.  No matter where you live or what you do, there will always be struggles.  It’s how you take those struggles, learn from them, and think to yourself, “How can I change what I’m doing right now to mitigate those negative thoughts?”

It makes a world of a difference when you just take a deep breath, analyze your situation, and realize the core root of your problems.  So when you’ve had the most stressful day ever, and it’s late, and you feel like the world is crashing down on you, I want you to know that it will be okay.  Tomorrow is a new day to take those stresses and get rid of them.  YOU WILL BE OKAY.  One day at a time.

[astound]

don’t waste your time | credit

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There is no time for negative energy.  It’s easy to be a victim of negative thoughts--and that’s okay.  Let them linger, but not for too long.  Assess your life and say, “What can I do to make my life better?  What needs to be changed so the negativity turns into positivity?”

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The Beginning: March 12th, 2018

I couldn’t even explain to you the feeling of happiness that I felt when I found out.  In the beginning, I didn’t think it would happen.  “No way would she ever want to come here,” I thought to myself, shaking away any hope that I had.  It just wasn’t possible.  But, when she called me and told me she put down her deposit to attend Clemson, I couldn’t contain my excitement.  On a silent floor of the library, I burst out with screams and tears of pure joy.  How relieving it was to know that I would finally be reunited with my sister again.

As we got closer over the years, I saw Meri go through all of the same things that I once did.  She would open up to me about issues and dilemmas in her life, and I would distinctly remember in my mind when that exact situation had happened to me.  I felt grateful that I was able to help her and give her advice on what to do due to my past mistakes.

However, I had always wished that I could relate a little bit more to her.  Granted, yes, I did go through those situations, but when I look back at them, they seem so silly and insignificant to me.  Sometimes, I feel myself getting frustrated with Meri because she cares about things that clearly don’t matter in the long run.  If only I could remember how those “insignificant” troubles once felt like the worst problems in the world to me.  Maybe then, I could really help my sister.

That’s why I decided to start this blog--to make sure my sister has the best, most convenient advice as possible from someone who can really relate.  The bottom line, Mer, is that I want you to learn from my mistakes, and be so blissfully happy in your college career.  The next 4 years of your life should be a positive and rewarding experience, and I want to help you accomplish that.  If sister is the only person who ends up reading this blog, then I love you Mer.  If you’re here to read my journey, well then welcome aboard!  If you’re here for some advice--I hope I can help you!

So, here’s to you, Meri.

-Meg