Bold of you to assume I have my shit together

@Me next time; Bicht

[the-memedaddy]

[nicollekidman]

okay yall there is zero subtext in the favourite……. the plot is licherally rachel weisz eating queen olivia colman’s p*ssy and ruling the kingdom then emma stone being like SIKE i got a mouth too bitch 

[merry-go-round-jailhouse]

[literaryreference]

The Peel is an offshoot of the Onion but honestly if someone told me this was real slam poetry I wouldn’t even question it

[warbyparker]

[thecatacombkid-deactivated20120]

Whoa. The MLA has officially devised a standard format to cite tweets in an academic paper. Sign of the times.

[davvvd]

ebooks, Horse. (horse_ebooks). “Leg Butt” 18 Nov 2011, 12:38 PM. Tweet.

[jon-arbuckle-murdered-lyman]

Reminder that Jon Arbuckle murdered Lyman in cold blood as a means to obtain Odie for his own cruel purposes

[genderflux-moved-deactivated201]

Not saying he wouldnt do this but SOURCE?????

[raeloganthesonic06fangirl]

Oh, boy, this is a fun bit of trivia.

See this book? This was published in 1998. I got it when I was 8 from my school bus driver for being really helpful on the route map for her first day, so this book has been in my possession for 19+ years. It’s very battered, but all the pages are still there, taped together, because the binding glue didn’t react well to the environment I lived in at the time.

Page 32 has a special “Bonus” spot for Lyman, with “updated” (for 1998) profile art

Closer look at the page

JON, WHAT DID YOU DO?

[raeloganthesonic06fangirl]

Oh, and also, if you know your Garfield Lore, then Lyman was Jon’s roommate until 1983, then left for an unknown reason, leaving Odie behind. He did appear in a Logo Box for Garfield’s 10th Birthday strip in 1988, as a cameo, but for the most part, Lyman has been absent for so long, they have continually rewritten how exactly Jon obtained Odie, ranging from adopting him from the same shop as Garfield, to adopting Odie a couple years into owning Garfield.

Except for

The popular 90s Garfield flash game, “Garfield’s Spooky Scavenger Hunt”, in which you can find Lyman chained up in a basement as a hidden eastern egg. He begs Garfield to give him some muffins to eat, then disappears after you leave the room and come back.

Garfield Lore is pretty messed up when you dig around.

[mousathe14]

….. what the hell

[trilllizard666]

Lyman Deserved To Die And Jon Arbuckle Did Nothing Wrong

[tarathiel]

I mean, we’re talking about a guy who drank an entire cup of dog semen, so I’m not all that surprised.

[tackysapphic]

excuse me what?

[jon-arbuckle-murdered-lyman]

May 30, 1990, a day that will live on in infamy.

[straightboyfriend]

[lilsugarbush]

[theglaremage]

This is a pure and wholesome game

[love]

Nature’s Reflection by Icy & Sot

[sparkel-dog]

[succubarbie-deactivated20190205]

no offense to polyamorous folks cus i know it works for some people but like every time i see somebody talk about how monogamous relationships are old fashioned and open relationships are the wave of the future im just like

[zanetbh-deactivated20181123]

Tbh this is full offense to poly people. Have fun sleeping with the same person for the rest of your life!

[succubarbie-deactivated20190205]

i will!! thanks!!

[sj0]

you have been visited by the seven magic dragon balls your biggest wish will be granted but only if you reblog

[hersheyhipster]

Couldn’t risk it.

[justjengie]

didn’t realize they change colors. now I know o gotta wish.

[pinayputa]

THIS SHIT IS REAL I GOT THE JOB I WAS NUTS ABOUT BC I REBLOGGED THIS YESTERDAY maybe it’s a coinkidink but it okay just take the necessary steps to achieve what you’re wishing for and YOU CAN DO IT

[valtsv]

[bongcop]

[bongcop]

a happy ending! 

[nancycunard]

im deleting my account

[stimman3000]

uh-oh looks like the early results are in and theyre not looking good

[stimman3000]

[slowspinningredemption]

in honour of halloween behold the four horsemen of the apocalypse

[faebinding-archive-deactivated2]

sometimes you gotta ‘its not that deep’ yourself