Lit

[toastbutteregg]

i want a cute boyfriend and $500,000

[coldafternoon-deactivated202102]

me: im gonna make an effort to be more positive! no more negativity for this bitch!

me, immediately afterwards: i can’t believe these fries are unsalted im gonna fucking kill myself also i hate men

[deanprincesster-deactivated2017]

professor is 6 mins late to first class ayyyy

[deanprincesster-deactivated2017]

so ten minutes after class was supposed to start someone throws a book at the whiteboard and everyone goes silent as this guy in a baseball cap leaps over his desk to the front of the room and says “I guess we can start class now. we’re gonna start by talking about my favorite subject: me”

my professor is a really young dude and disguised himself as a student

[starsshinedarkly77]

Power play of the century???

[lion-prince-deactivated20160427]

me: *has no money* when i get money i’ll definitely buy that

me: *gets money* okay but do i really want that??

[lovingconcept]

The best part of liking someone is when they nerd out about something to you, and you’re just like “Wow what a dork” but also like “wow what a cutie I love you”

[tortagnamgnam]

This is the lucky clover cat. reblog this in 30 seconds & he will bring u good luck and fortune.

[unclebabie]

THIS ONE!!! THIS IS THE ONE THAT WORKS!!!!!

I reblogged him the day i started treatment and 1. GOT TO MY APPOINTMENT ON TIME 2. FOUND A FREE PARKING TICKET SOMEONE LEFT IN THE METER FOR ME AND 3. GOT FREE STARBUCKS AFTER MY APPOINTMENT!!!!!

[cutedemonbabe]

I’m convinced bc I reblogged this on Friday, got hired at a job I had a million interviews for, went on a first date that went well, and got kissed a billion times so like hell ya to the luck cat

[julstudies]

lol guys

[2-shane-s]

Date someone who will date you

[methfall]

Need me a freak like that

[jumex]

I don’t need a man but where is he

[beinspiredbymusic]

in my head: constructs witty and insightful answers to interview questions for when I'm famous

ordering at a restaurant: please I the soup want

[oswednesday]

when i become a serial killer ill leave tapes that have mmm whatcya say in the mouth’s of all my victims

[conksucker-deactivated20120621]

when

[tardisblue-pandas-deactivated20]

Smart and lazy is a horrible combination that results in disappointed teachers, exasperated friends and a whole lot of bad doodling

[wytchlock-deactivated20200207]

Oh shit this was literally me in school

[the-impossible-mind-deactivated]

Don’t forget those angry parents and half finished homework assignments crumpled in your binders

[reganmariie]

Im smart and tired I want to do good but i dont feel like trying anymore

[justicelordd]

[fly-me-to-starbucks]

We’re on to you bad boys

[theblasianbarbie]

im sick of having crushes its time for the tables to turn and ppl to have crushes on me!!!!!

[frank--enstein]

[biff-donderglutes]

yo same

[pileofknives]

it do be like that though

[ronchronchronch]

I don’t think this should be reblogged without the context that this a nude Ghost Rider pin-up that was printed in an official Marvel Comics swimsuit special 

[speakforthepits]

Its always good to know what to do when your baby is in danger.

[x423h]

This could save lives

[vulcan-science]

I had to do this twice for my dog and it saved his life. Please reblog.

[lightmoondiva]

I can’t scroll by this, my baby and every other puppy has got me so whipped

[xfullcanvasx-deactivated2015120]

this was the scariest thing i have ever had to do

[libraryspectre]

Do y'all remember being a kid and trying to read in the car while it was dark outside and your parents wouldn’t let you turn on the light so you would try to grab snatches of sentences when you passed by street lights

[bodyglitter]

i dont understand how i procrastinate everything i do like i even procrastinate watching tv shows? i feel like normally you would normally procrastinate doing things you dont enjoy like homework and cleaning and stuff but tv shows? who am i