[safewithsilence-deactivated2023]

"اللهم لا تعلقني بأحد فيكسرني ، ولا تعلق أحدا بي فأخذله ولا تجعلني حملاً ثقيلا علي قلب أحد ، وأبعدني يالله عن من يتمني بعدي حتي لو كان أحب عبادك لي."

"O Allah, do not attach me to anyone, so that he breaks me, and do not attach anyone to me, so that I fail him. Do not make me a heavy burden on anyone's heart and distance me, O Allah, from those who want my distance, even if it is Your slave dearest to me."

[arafrenglish]

"اغْمُريني/اغْمُرني"

Literal meaning: "immerse/flood me"

Figurative meaning: "hug me"

It's not just wrap your arms around me. It's immerse me with your being; I want to forget me and feel you only.

It's in Lebanese dialect.

[aboonoor]

“One of the signs of a healthy heart is that the heart always encourages its owner to return to God, and humble himself before Him.”

Ighathat al-Lahfan min Masayid ash-Shaytan by Ibn al-Qayyim (v. 1, p. 71)

[annabethisterrified]

"And so we started to swap books...I don't have the words to describe it, but it was like going on a journey with someone. Where didn't matter. That's the power of literature, you know, it can act like little love letters between people who can only explain their feelings by pointing at other people's."

ANXIOUS PEOPLE by Fredrik Backman

[ruhlare]

[beykhabarr]

Is adoginthemanger okay?

who?

[adoginthemanger-deactivated2024]

When will my favourite person be online :(

[beykhabarr]

My toxic trait is that I ardently believe that when someone says something mean when they're angry and later try to undo it by saying that they 'didn't mean it and only said it because they were angry' they absolutely did mean it, and were thinking about that said sentence for a long time. Anger doesn't give you ideas, it just removes your filters. People think 'I take it back' fixes things, no it doesn't.

[beykhabarr]

I havent been here in a long time but i dont know where to put my thoughts update on life is that i am repulsed at the thought of intimacy and at the thought of someone depending on me for anything because its unfair that i cant depend on anyone like that. I am repulsed at the thought of contact but arghhhhhhhh in the early hours of the morning i justtt waaant to be helddddd for someone to wait for me to wake up, for innocent touch innocent touch shy glances FUCKING HELL. Innocent unintentional grazing of hand only grazing because if you hold it i will run away.

[022023]

[beykhabarr]

not me realizing that the only way to not get continually hurt is it stop caring and detach to save me from me because i am incapable of normal connections.

[beykhabarr]

guess who for a second forgot that i am incapable of having normal connections and every single change hurts me more than the normal amount

[beykhabarr]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IMAGINE HAVING A RELATIVELY GOOD FEELY AND PEACEFUL DAY AND THEN TUMBLR EXPLORE PAGE SHOVES OLD POSTS THAT I WANT TO FORGET EXIST IN MY FACE AND SUDDENLY MY STOMACH IS IN A PIT

[beykhabarr]

There is an undeniable probability that i am nothing more than a void that keeps growing, yet what i want hasnt expanded, there's a possibility that i have an insatiable desire to feel loved and cared for. All i wanted was for someone to want to know, what, where how I was, to ask, to want to ask, to want to care. To care like there's no alternative, but to be present with love, and not as an obligation. For someone to sit with me as the silence of the night gnaws on my bones, where any distraction feels welcome, any friendly word, interaction a gift sent from heavens. I wonder why i wanted those things for myself, its been hours and i cant stop thinking, i want those things for myself because they are things I so easily give. I realized above all that what I wanted was to be loved by myself, to be loved the way that I love. The love i give is the love I want to receive, anything less leaves me feeling unfulfilled, anything that doesn't match the energy that I put in feels unfullfilling. In a way that makes me vain, and selfish and all other bad things, but I cant help but feel this way, even when i know its wrong.

[beykhabarr]

i hate my anxious self so much I cant tell if something is actually wrong or if i am imagining things, and then if i talk about it i will come off as incredibly pestering so to avoid all of that the best thing to do is to tell myself i don't care either way

[beykhabarr]

when im overthinking something and i keep finding tiny bits without even looking to prove what im worried about and it keeps getting worse

[beykhabarr]

I hate talking to someone when im feeling weak and them realizing suddenly that theyre in that moment better or stronger than i am and subtly rubbing it in my face istg never showing any signs of weakness ever again