dope strider

> pimpmaster hustledaddy: drop it like its hot

[bigdstride]

dave strider aka big d aka creator of sbahj aka that guy with a blog ask me || old blog || sick beats

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// ooc posts will have "//" appended before them and in character and ooc tags will similarly be separated by "//". i also run things over at @th3-l4c3r4tor

RULES FOR ASKS: - dont be weird - means no incest and absolutely No shit that you wouldnt ask an actual middle/jh schooler

ABOUT THE ACCOUNT: - kinda meant to continue from where dave left his old blogspot at but not too concerned about the canon timeline or whatever - also sorry this may be a cardinal sin or whatever but i dont really gun for davekat that much. feel free to ask about him still but theyre probs just in the entire meteorstuck situation still rather than the epilogues. you get - other rpers feel free to interact! ntm on serious roleplays tho i just like blogging as dave lol

- i also go on pesterchum as turntechGuyhead if youd ever want to rp one on one. though my experience with such is p limited. sorry

[bigdstride]

hey sup

[bigdstride]

what if you were evil

also i stole your text style

you got the simpson and the smurf

its up to you to decide which one is the lesser evil

also you didnt even get it right

if you want to steal my brand at least put some effort in

that shit is skinner than meghan trainor and she swears she isnt on ozempic

guess the bass just shook all the meat off her bones

[worldofnugs]

The goods..

[awsomestonerblog]

Wtf is this. Lol

[bigdstride]

any new years resolutions???

happy new year 🔥

1. never go to seaworld again

2. dont wear a sweaty nic cage wig for christmas

3. never go to seaworld again

[bigdstride]

hey hustlemaster

have you ever played lobotomy corporation

is this some new internet troll dogwhistle to mean go kill yourself or something

[bigdstride]

any big plans for this holiday season? :3

nah

[bigdstride]

any big plans for this holiday season? :3

nah

[bigdstride]

whens the next sbahj installment dropping im so ready

look i know this shit is hella twisted. a world without new sbahj??? jesus. might as well go down to the pier and comedically slip on a banana peel

but you cant rush masterpiece ok. just remember: "patience is the key to paradise" -snoop dogg

i am almost 100% certain snoop dogg said that

[bigdstride]

merry Christmas, hustlemaster :))))

been listneneing to ur sick fires since august

hey

merry kringlefuck to you too bro

since tis the season to be goddamn jolly bless all your friends with the boon that is this charming postcard

100% joy and merriment guaranteed

no refunds allowed

anyways you better chill out on those fires

i mean i respect the dedication

new additions to the grovel and weep on account of my sick beats club always appreciated

but if you keep going at this rate the heatll supersede climate change and end christmas faster than you can say santa watches kids

and he does you know

he does watch kids

[bigdstride]

so when was everyone supposed to get down and build that monument of me again

[rapwrld96]

[barackobama]

[bigdstride]

just got chicken poppers at this shitty old joint and heard the microwave ding

whats even the point

[bigdstride]

dave you suck

sorry you have to pay for that aint making a soiled maiden out of me for nigh but a penny sir

[bigdstride]

yo heard from the grapevine that this was a pretty chill hub might hang out here sometime. been needing a new spot anyways since bro that total devil titillating flesh dong used my password sheet to wipe down one of his weirdly plump smuppets so no way am i ever gonna touch that shit again i think maybe that was his way of preserving the strider name after seeing all the ill truths i was spitting about simon or something oh man. simon

remember this douchedag?

i never even got to talk about the dude whos name i just found out is carl and, ok, fuck it, im taking this goddamn opportunity by its fat candy encrusted double chin and finishing off what i started, beginning with the sick ass bro who decided that gelling his hair up into a crude imitation of two floppy dongs was THE. SHIT

like can you just look at him for one second and tell me that whoever birthed this smarmy motherfucker didnt just turn heel and hang themselves on the nearest ceiling pole because gogdamn shit see my fingers cant even hit these keys right anymore pimpmaster losing his touch with the darls and the dj is progressively getting closer to understanding hellen keller while carl good old carl is still staring at you with those same lust hooded eyes except this time, there might be a hint of excitement over there in making you squirm???? dont wanna think about that actually anyways for the love of god just look at this shit. status: the quiet one, dead easy going. and then they just slap a pic of him posing up like 1995 snoop dogg on his 5th bender (pictured below)

am i seriously supposed to look at this and go "man carl you are just the sickest nasty motherfucker i have ever laid my eyes upon, let me graze upon your feet like a little baby bambi and suck on the capitalist candy that is your teets"????? whoever wrote and/or drew this should comedically fall in a sewer and have the manhole cover lock them in ok this is like the gift that just keeps on giving it feels like motherfucking christmas up in this joint like im not even kidding hahaha shits got me wrinkling up harder than the grandfather on your mothers side who you thought was dead but reallys just rotting over at a retirement home whatev come peep this crap: his interests include shooting hoops, hip hop tunes, computer games... pretty damn normal so far. no big eyebrow raisers i mean hell yeah who doesnt enjoy going out and scoring some wicked goals over at the sportsball hoops am i right. but then oh god but then hahahahahhaha then it says that one of his FAVORITE things in the ENTIRE WORLD is. are you ready for this i dont think youre ready for this but im dropping this shit on you like a hot potato anyways because one of his favorite things in the entire world is vanilla ice cream vanilla ice cream like cmon im not trying to say anything but youve gotta be some kind of impercipient sleezeball to not get the gem of irony hiding behind all this dripped out, arguably vanilla flavored, cred fests now im not trying to start anything in our good year of trump god bless his soul 2025 so let me just say that this dude is just so clearly a strawberry typa guy and it gets my panties in a bunch to see his soul fucking desecrated so badly. like this shit is stupefying get my man a scoop of that pink berry goodness posthaste and make it snappy because aint no shit gets radder than a man clad with a sweet course of siberian moo sap sorry i think im getting kinda parasocial with my friend carl here maybe i should reel it back a bit ok reeling it back a bit wow this really got away from me what was i even going to write about oh yeah leave shit in my askbox i guess and ill try to satisfy all you groveling masses with an answer from the one, the only, the all-mighty GUY WITH A *NEW* BLOG. shit giant honor i know just remind me to never enter the kids zone ever again its like a fucking vice

// hey so this a new blog im running as dave. this was just meant to be a short introductory post but it kinda Did get away from me so lol // anyways if you dont understand/know who the fuck hes even gabbering on about refer to his old blog. i am basically running this like he lost access to the blogspot but couldnt resist the call of the Blog // but whatever tldr: send him asks. he will answer. eventually

[th3-l4c3r4tor]

D4V3

D4V3

1S TH1S 1S YOU D4V3?????

[bigdstride]

holy shit this might be the worst thing youve ever made

how did you even find this blog

[th3-l4c3r4tor]

DONT AVO1D TH3 SUBJ3CT D4V3

ADM1T TH4T TH1S "DOUCH3D4G W1TH LUSTFUL 3Y3S" 1S YOU >:]

[bigdstride]

now i know its hard to resist

but you really gotta stop thinking about my lustful eyes

its getting kind of embarrassing for you to be macking this publicly on the bubblr cool guy extraordinaire

[th3-l4c3r4tor]

SORRY

YOUR COOLK1D W1L3S JUST SM3LL TOO GOOD TO R3S1ST SOM3T1M3S >;]

BUT R1GHT NOW YOU K1ND OF SM3LL L1K3.......

L1K3...

L1K3 4 COW4RD WHO C4NT ADM1T WH3N H3 H4S B33N TOT4LLY B3ST3D 1N 4 FUN G4M3 OF "1S TH1S YOU D4V3"

HH4H4H4H4H4H4H4H4H4H4H4H4HH4

[bigdstride]

did you make this blog just so you can keep sending me this crap after i sent you to the slums