“There’s a specific feeling in this world, one that I never expected to experience, and one I hope you never have to. But before you think I’m talking about a bad feeling, I’m not talking about a bad feeling at all! In fact, it’s one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever felt. I wouldn’t want it for anyone, except for those that need it.
“Just before the ‘event’ with the Crystal Heart, I had a thousand sins wandering through my mind, taunting me that now I was trying to do the right thing after a life of hatred and bitterness, all-consuming. Memories tend to cling that way. All the good I was doing felt like it what I should have been doing before, a drop in the bucket against all the things wrong I had done. By all rights, ponies would have reason to celebrate and be glad I was gone. Life would return to normal again, a better life without me.
“I struggled to come back for what seemed pointless to assign a time to. I couldn’t tell the difference between seconds and weeks, if even that. I didn’t feel the dark weight pulling me back like the first time, but I felt just as lost, like an echo through a dark chasm trying to find its way. When I finally found ‘myself’ as it were, and broke free back into the living world, it felt as though I had been shot out of a canon, and in the seconds before I materialized, I had enough consciousness to guess I might come out underground, or some other horrible fate.
“Instead, I landed in a house. And before I could even process what was happening, I was choked in a hug with someone sobbing into my shoulder. When my vision cleared, I couldn’t help but feel my chest go tight. It was the last one I had expected to see, and the only one I wanted to.
“I’m not the best speaker, or writer, but if nothing else I say here seems worthwhile, just know this:
“You never truly know how much of a blessing it is until it’s all over, until you have a heart willing to realize when you are given something you were never owed. The feeling you get when someone who knows you, who knows all you’ve done, who has seen your darkest sides, yet still cares for you enough that they took care of you even when no one else would… even after they believed you gone… that is a special feeling. That is an irreplaceable feeling.
“I don’t think Coffee Talk ever saw my tears for all the tears she had herself, but that’s okay. As long as I live, I will take care of her as she took care of me, as friend or however I can. Not just because I ‘owe her,’ but because for once I’m able to love someone other than myself, out of the goodness of her heart that she shared with mine.”
romaincrisis
snowghoul
baratheonpilled
yousharknotpass
izzy806
