ciel tells sebastian to arrange a meeting with lizzy so they could discuss marriage. sebastian feels a lump in his throat because lately he had been so happy in their own little world for two that he had managed to forget that one of a young earl’s duties — especially one nearing adulthood — was marriage and starting a family. he arranges the meeting, but asks ciel to give him a day off. if his master notices his feelings, he doesn’t comment on them, only agrees to let tanaka assist him for the day instead. when the day finally comes and, thanks to his sharpened hearing, he catches the sound of the approaching carriage, he leaves the estate, unwilling to hear how the entire conversation unfolds. since he has the day off, he might as well spend it wandering through london and checking on the shops that belong to them. yet his thoughts keep circling back to the subject of marriage, imagining lizzy happily throwing her arms around ciel’s neck, saying she would become the best wife under the sun and that she thought this moment would never come. his mind already drifts to the wedding day itself, wondering how he is supposed to survive it when the mere thought makes his stomach twist in a way unworthy of a creature like him. in the end, accomplishing absolutely nothing, he returns to the estate much earlier than planned, silently praying lizzy has already gone home. hearing the wonderful news from the servants will be more than enough. he peeks into ciel’s office to announce that he has returned and asks whether his master would like him to prepare a bath. ciel nods, saying nothing else. but sebastian’s mind cannot stop drowning in images of today’s meeting, so while unbuttoning ciel’s shirt, he finally decides to kill his curiosity and ask, pretending to be nothing more than a concerned butler.
“and how did lady elizabeth react?” he starts quietly, as if uncertain whether he truly wants to hear the answer.
“with tears,” ciel replies flatly.
“i should have expected that. she has always been remarkably expressive.” he swallows, despite how dry his mouth feels. “so? when did you settle on a tentative date?”
the answer makes sebastian’s hands freeze on the buttons. he does not know whether ciel truly said that or if his mind is simply playing tricks on him, twisting sounds into whatever it wishes to hear.
“i beg your pardon?” he asks without moving, his heart beating faster than the clock on the wall marking off seconds that seem to stretch into eternity.
“there will be no wedding.”
sebastian finally lifts his head only to find two mismatched irises fixed on him with an expression he cannot decipher.
“oh. oh.” he drops his gaze again beneath the weight of it. in his mind he scolds himself for feeling so submissive before an ordinary human. “i am deeply—” sorry to hear that? he cannot lie. he clears his throat, quickly undoing the rest of the buttons even though he can feel his hands trembling. “then we shall search for another suitable candidate.”
“there won’t be another candidate either.”
“the decision is yours, my lord.” he tries to remain professional, though he knows he is failing miserably.
“you’ve never agreed with me this quickly before.”
“i have simply learned with age that once you make a decision, it is rather difficult to change your mind.”
“you certainly don’t look like someone who intends to influence my plans,” ciel replies, and sebastian presses a hand over his own mouth and feels a smile filling his entire face, one he does not even know how long has been there.