.Severus.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Introduction...that I was forced to do.

Hi. I'm Severus Snape, and if it wasn't already obvious, I don't want to be here.

These are my flags ;

I'm in Slytherin. Yes, boo all you'd like. It feeds my sarcasm and hatred.

People I know...and people who know me for reasons I won't get into:

@miss-lily-evans-potter - Lily is a dramatic irony kind of gal. She's known me for too long, and I'm pretty sure I know too much about her (tmi doesn't exist).

@prongspotter-s - if the bisexual flag had some extra question marks, Potter would be the perfect personification of it.

@blacksheepoftheblackfamily - rich asshole I wish God would strike with a holy bolt of humbling lightning. He's rational like once every before a full moon because that's when his little boyfriend dicks him do-

@w-o-r-m-t-a-i-l - he's trying his best, and yet he's getting nowhere.

@moony-lupin-rjl - ...what can I say? He's okay. The only one of the three Mga hunghang na palayok na naninigarilyo that doesn't piss me off.

@sunshine-and-rosiers - rosier girl with her head in the clouds...a bit scary? Somehow? Perhaps it's that Rosier intimidation.

@hestia-farida-jones - ...no. she's fine I just...shes um. There.

@bellatrix-carina-black - Bella. I thought she was...an odity...at first. She's a lot better once you get to know her. I can't believe I said that.

@fartybartyjunior - crouch. jr... psycho. We don't talk much, and I like keeping it that way. He creeps me out.

@cissa-swans - Cissy. She's kind. I've known her for a while now...I guess she's a little like an older sister?

@marlz-mckinnon - loud with too much energy, but I can appreciate her creativity, despite it being aggravatingly loud.

@marylicious - she's not that bad. She's kind, fashionable, and all that good stuff.

@gorgeous-golden-gilderoy - he's stupid and yet witty...idiots yearn to be like him while smart people look the other way

@xenophilius-the-strange - he's alright. A bit like Pandora but...more coherent.

That's it for now.

[sternsalcove]

Dear Reader or whatever,

Listen up. Stern isn't going to be around for a while so you're stuck with me, Em. And boy do I have news for you?

So you know that obnoxiously perfect little pair, Evans and Snape? Of course, you do. Stern practically salivates over them. They're probably gonna break up.

I've always said it, they don't work well together. I mean, Snape is a workaholic with practically no romantic bone in their body, and Evans is just too sweet of a gal. Too forgiving — who in their right mind doesn't break up with someone after they failed to show up to your loved one's funeral?

Snape has to be guilt-tripping her or something, this is capital NUTS. Break or not, I am so waiting for a crack in the porcelain or downfall.

@miss-lily-evans-potter , @bellatrix-carina-black , @fartybartyjunior , @cissa-swans , @marylicious , @gorgeous-golden-gilderoy , @hestia-farida-jones , @acelovesremuslupin , @sunshine-and-rosiers , @little-star-regulus , @w-o-r-m-t-a-i-l , @prongspotter-s , @xenophilius-the-strange , @bitterandbruisedsev , @blacksheepoftheblackfamily , @moony-lupin-rjl

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Sev’s and I’s personal lives should not be the subject of your fun! We haven’t ‘broken up’ we’re having a break, actually. And I’ll have you know, it was a really hard decision! It wasn’t done on the whim. @bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

You tell them, Lils. I swear, we aren't some kind of reality TV show for people to twist and broadcast...it cannot be this exciting to spread misinformation.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily stared at her feet, taking another deep breath. This could go either way; he accepts it, or he fights it. Which she’d rather him do, she doesn’t know. “Can we talk? About… us? Maybe it’s better if we..” she trailed off, leaving the question open for interpretation.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus lifted his head to rest his chin on the table. He looked like he'd sucked a lemon — eyes crinkled and squinting because of the tears he was holding back. "If you want," he swallowed, wiping his eyes quickly with his sleeve.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily tiptoed over, swallowing down any remaining tears that threatened to spill. She sat next to him again, taking one of his hands into hers. She hated to see him cry (even if the tears hadn’t fallen yet) and it was worse that she was the cause of his tears.

A mantra played in her head:‘Be strong for him, Lily. You’re the one causing this.’ The voice not leaving. The voice reminding her of what she’s doing. Months of a loving relationship between them was going to waste. she hadn’t felt close to the boy in weeks— constant excuses of ‘I need to go to work, sorry’, ‘Lucius needs me, I’ll be back soon’, and ‘I can’t make it tonight, I have something to do’ constantly echoed in her mind.

“I think it’s best if we… if we take a break,” she said quietly, the soul of their relationship breaking into the air, shattering into a million pieces.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus froze. His eyes were stuck on where their hands met, and his breath hitched completely in his chest. But instead of trying to speak, he nodded. He squeezed her hand softly, tears finally rolling down his face.

He felt horrible crying like that. He didn't want her to feel like she needed to keep comforting him. "It's okay," Severus mumbled, taking his hand out of hers. "That's...fine. Sorry, give me a second," he wiped the tears on his cheeks away and looked up at the ceiling. "Fuck, s-sorry, I swear I'm not trying to make it harder. I don't know why I can't pull myself together."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily had to look away for a second to regain her cracking composure. Would she take this back if she could? Yes. Does she regret it? Again, yes. But is it the best for them? Maybe..

“hey, it’s okay,” she murmured, her hand ghosting over his shoulder, wanting to comfort him. “It’s just a break, mhm? W-we can get through this, sev. I know you’re just… so busy, and I don’t want to hold you back from doing your job,” she breathed, quickly wiping her eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Hold me back?" Severus laughed sadly, "You never held me back, Lily... I just didn't want to depend on you so much and...wear you out," he shrugged his shoulders, lowering his head again just as his smile dropped. "And I know that we've talked about it before, but I guess I was more worried about you being held back by me."

His lips trembled, "I didn't know that I was hurting you in the process."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

“Wear me out? Never, you never did,” Lily sighed softly, tucking a stray hair behind Severus’s ear. “We’ve just… not spent much time together in what—“ she looked down at her fingers, counting for a moment, “5 weeks? I know we’ve been busy with school, you with work…” she trailed off.

“I just want to spend time with you,” Lily whispered, her voice breaking mid sentence.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus rubbed his wrists nervously, trying to figure out if he could tell her what was really happening or not. He ultimately chose against it and simply nodded again. "I know, I'm sorry. I should've tried a little harder. I don't...um really know how to juggle everything yet..."

He exhaled, looking at the floor. "This is a mess,"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”indeed, a mess,” Lily laughed wetly. “You need the money, and I don’t want to… pressurise you, so maybe it’s the best?” She murmured, turning his head towards her, staring into his eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

He still couldn't look at her completely, only a quick glance and he was ready to start bawling his eyes out. He could've vented, she wanted to be there for him, but what if he just messed things up more? Severus finally managed to whisper a small 'yeah' before resting his head on her shoulder. "For the best..."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily placed a kiss on top of his head, lingering there for a moment. “Something‘s wrong, hm? Even if we’re… you can still tell me. I’ll always be here for you,” she whispered, leaning her head against his. She just wants to know what’s plaguing his mind— what’s taking him away from her.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus squeezed his shoulders at the kiss, his cheeks warming despite himself. "I don't know if it's really the right time," he mumbled, picking at his nails. "I want to see if I can take care of it myself first...maybe figure out how to put an end to it during our break."

It would be safer, he thought, because then she wouldn't be dragged into it. Not completely.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily couldn’t help but envelope his hand into hers, avoiding him making his hands stained with specks of blood. She placed yet another gentle kiss upon his head— she can’t help but take care of him it seems. “That’s alright, love,” she said with a sigh, although it was reassuring.

“but please, if you need financial help, physically help, or just— whatever, please tell me?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

He wasn't sure he could agree with that or promise, but Severus still nodded. Maybe...somewhere along the way, he'd lose enough pride and fear. "I'll... try. I'll try." He settled, sighing softly. "I'm sorry."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”for?” Lily replied gently. Her anger had partially subsided— yes, she was still mad about the funeral but… she can’t come up with an excuse for him. “Mum had a lovely funeral, by the way. Petunia, she did great,” she huffed slightly, she never liked to admit if petunia did something well.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Just...not being there for you," he murmured, "You're always there for me, but I didn't show up when you needed me the most. That's the worst mistake I've ever made, and I'm sorry."

Severus tilted his head to the side, smiling a little at that. "I'm glad some things went well, at least..."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

“it’s.. I’ve forgiven you, yeah? No need to worry your pretty head, ‘Kay?” Lily said, trying to lighten the mood with a smile. She couldn’t ever stay mad at him for long. Even when he got mad at her over stuff or annoyed her.

“mhm, at least something did…” she trailed off, then quickly continued, “vermin had the audacity to say ‘oh, where’s your little boyfriend’, when he turned up at the after party! He didn’t even turn up to the funeral.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus frowned at the mention of...*gag*. Vernon.

He groaned dramatically. "He still showed up. For the food, I'm guessing." He mumbled while limply wrapping an arm around her.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily hummed in agreement. “Mm, he ate it all too,” she whispered humorously, a small laugh escaping into the tense air. “He got shit-faced, too. Pledged to shake his… you-know-what, on mum’s grave— the disrespectful swine.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

One eyebrow shot up and Severus pulled away slightly to look at Lily. "Pardon?" He choked out, not even trying to hide his disgust. "Well, now I'm really disappointed that I wasn't there. What does Petunia see in him?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily stared at her feet, taking another deep breath. This could go either way; he accepts it, or he fights it. Which she’d rather him do, she doesn’t know. “Can we talk? About… us? Maybe it’s better if we..” she trailed off, leaving the question open for interpretation.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus lifted his head to rest his chin on the table. He looked like he'd sucked a lemon — eyes crinkled and squinting because of the tears he was holding back. "If you want," he swallowed, wiping his eyes quickly with his sleeve.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily tiptoed over, swallowing down any remaining tears that threatened to spill. She sat next to him again, taking one of his hands into hers. She hated to see him cry (even if the tears hadn’t fallen yet) and it was worse that she was the cause of his tears.

A mantra played in her head:‘Be strong for him, Lily. You’re the one causing this.’ The voice not leaving. The voice reminding her of what she’s doing. Months of a loving relationship between them was going to waste. she hadn’t felt close to the boy in weeks— constant excuses of ‘I need to go to work, sorry’, ‘Lucius needs me, I’ll be back soon’, and ‘I can’t make it tonight, I have something to do’ constantly echoed in her mind.

“I think it’s best if we… if we take a break,” she said quietly, the soul of their relationship breaking into the air, shattering into a million pieces.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus froze. His eyes were stuck on where their hands met, and his breath hitched completely in his chest. But instead of trying to speak, he nodded. He squeezed her hand softly, tears finally rolling down his face.

He felt horrible crying like that. He didn't want her to feel like she needed to keep comforting him. "It's okay," Severus mumbled, taking his hand out of hers. "That's...fine. Sorry, give me a second," he wiped the tears on his cheeks away and looked up at the ceiling. "Fuck, s-sorry, I swear I'm not trying to make it harder. I don't know why I can't pull myself together."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily had to look away for a second to regain her cracking composure. Would she take this back if she could? Yes. Does she regret it? Again, yes. But is it the best for them? Maybe..

“hey, it’s okay,” she murmured, her hand ghosting over his shoulder, wanting to comfort him. “It’s just a break, mhm? W-we can get through this, sev. I know you’re just… so busy, and I don’t want to hold you back from doing your job,” she breathed, quickly wiping her eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Hold me back?" Severus laughed sadly, "You never held me back, Lily... I just didn't want to depend on you so much and...wear you out," he shrugged his shoulders, lowering his head again just as his smile dropped. "And I know that we've talked about it before, but I guess I was more worried about you being held back by me."

His lips trembled, "I didn't know that I was hurting you in the process."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

“Wear me out? Never, you never did,” Lily sighed softly, tucking a stray hair behind Severus’s ear. “We’ve just… not spent much time together in what—“ she looked down at her fingers, counting for a moment, “5 weeks? I know we’ve been busy with school, you with work…” she trailed off.

“I just want to spend time with you,” Lily whispered, her voice breaking mid sentence.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus rubbed his wrists nervously, trying to figure out if he could tell her what was really happening or not. He ultimately chose against it and simply nodded again. "I know, I'm sorry. I should've tried a little harder. I don't...um really know how to juggle everything yet..."

He exhaled, looking at the floor. "This is a mess,"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”indeed, a mess,” Lily laughed wetly. “You need the money, and I don’t want to… pressurise you, so maybe it’s the best?” She murmured, turning his head towards her, staring into his eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

He still couldn't look at her completely, only a quick glance and he was ready to start bawling his eyes out. He could've vented, she wanted to be there for him, but what if he just messed things up more? Severus finally managed to whisper a small 'yeah' before resting his head on her shoulder. "For the best..."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily placed a kiss on top of his head, lingering there for a moment. “Something‘s wrong, hm? Even if we’re… you can still tell me. I’ll always be here for you,” she whispered, leaning her head against his. She just wants to know what’s plaguing his mind— what’s taking him away from her.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus squeezed his shoulders at the kiss, his cheeks warming despite himself. "I don't know if it's really the right time," he mumbled, picking at his nails. "I want to see if I can take care of it myself first...maybe figure out how to put an end to it during our break."

It would be safer, he thought, because then she wouldn't be dragged into it. Not completely.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily couldn’t help but envelope his hand into hers, avoiding him making his hands stained with specks of blood. She placed yet another gentle kiss upon his head— she can’t help but take care of him it seems. “That’s alright, love,” she said with a sigh, although it was reassuring.

“but please, if you need financial help, physically help, or just— whatever, please tell me?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

He wasn't sure he could agree with that or promise, but Severus still nodded. Maybe...somewhere along the way, he'd lose enough pride and fear. "I'll... try. I'll try." He settled, sighing softly. "I'm sorry."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”for?” Lily replied gently. Her anger had partially subsided— yes, she was still mad about the funeral but… she can’t come up with an excuse for him. “Mum had a lovely funeral, by the way. Petunia, she did great,” she huffed slightly, she never liked to admit if petunia did something well.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Just...not being there for you," he murmured, "You're always there for me, but I didn't show up when you needed me the most. That's the worst mistake I've ever made, and I'm sorry."

Severus tilted his head to the side, smiling a little at that. "I'm glad some things went well, at least..."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

“it’s.. I’ve forgiven you, yeah? No need to worry your pretty head, ‘Kay?” Lily said, trying to lighten the mood with a smile. She couldn’t ever stay mad at him for long. Even when he got mad at her over stuff or annoyed her.

“mhm, at least something did…” she trailed off, then quickly continued, “vermin had the audacity to say ‘oh, where’s your little boyfriend’, when he turned up at the after party! He didn’t even turn up to the funeral.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus frowned at the mention of...*gag*. Vernon.

He groaned dramatically. "He still showed up. For the food, I'm guessing." He mumbled while limply wrapping an arm around her.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily stared at her feet, taking another deep breath. This could go either way; he accepts it, or he fights it. Which she’d rather him do, she doesn’t know. “Can we talk? About… us? Maybe it’s better if we..” she trailed off, leaving the question open for interpretation.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus lifted his head to rest his chin on the table. He looked like he'd sucked a lemon — eyes crinkled and squinting because of the tears he was holding back. "If you want," he swallowed, wiping his eyes quickly with his sleeve.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily tiptoed over, swallowing down any remaining tears that threatened to spill. She sat next to him again, taking one of his hands into hers. She hated to see him cry (even if the tears hadn’t fallen yet) and it was worse that she was the cause of his tears.

A mantra played in her head:‘Be strong for him, Lily. You’re the one causing this.’ The voice not leaving. The voice reminding her of what she’s doing. Months of a loving relationship between them was going to waste. she hadn’t felt close to the boy in weeks— constant excuses of ‘I need to go to work, sorry’, ‘Lucius needs me, I’ll be back soon’, and ‘I can’t make it tonight, I have something to do’ constantly echoed in her mind.

“I think it’s best if we… if we take a break,” she said quietly, the soul of their relationship breaking into the air, shattering into a million pieces.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus froze. His eyes were stuck on where their hands met, and his breath hitched completely in his chest. But instead of trying to speak, he nodded. He squeezed her hand softly, tears finally rolling down his face.

He felt horrible crying like that. He didn't want her to feel like she needed to keep comforting him. "It's okay," Severus mumbled, taking his hand out of hers. "That's...fine. Sorry, give me a second," he wiped the tears on his cheeks away and looked up at the ceiling. "Fuck, s-sorry, I swear I'm not trying to make it harder. I don't know why I can't pull myself together."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily had to look away for a second to regain her cracking composure. Would she take this back if she could? Yes. Does she regret it? Again, yes. But is it the best for them? Maybe..

“hey, it’s okay,” she murmured, her hand ghosting over his shoulder, wanting to comfort him. “It’s just a break, mhm? W-we can get through this, sev. I know you’re just… so busy, and I don’t want to hold you back from doing your job,” she breathed, quickly wiping her eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Hold me back?" Severus laughed sadly, "You never held me back, Lily... I just didn't want to depend on you so much and...wear you out," he shrugged his shoulders, lowering his head again just as his smile dropped. "And I know that we've talked about it before, but I guess I was more worried about you being held back by me."

His lips trembled, "I didn't know that I was hurting you in the process."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

“Wear me out? Never, you never did,” Lily sighed softly, tucking a stray hair behind Severus’s ear. “We’ve just… not spent much time together in what—“ she looked down at her fingers, counting for a moment, “5 weeks? I know we’ve been busy with school, you with work…” she trailed off.

“I just want to spend time with you,” Lily whispered, her voice breaking mid sentence.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus rubbed his wrists nervously, trying to figure out if he could tell her what was really happening or not. He ultimately chose against it and simply nodded again. "I know, I'm sorry. I should've tried a little harder. I don't...um really know how to juggle everything yet..."

He exhaled, looking at the floor. "This is a mess,"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”indeed, a mess,” Lily laughed wetly. “You need the money, and I don’t want to… pressurise you, so maybe it’s the best?” She murmured, turning his head towards her, staring into his eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

He still couldn't look at her completely, only a quick glance and he was ready to start bawling his eyes out. He could've vented, she wanted to be there for him, but what if he just messed things up more? Severus finally managed to whisper a small 'yeah' before resting his head on her shoulder. "For the best..."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily placed a kiss on top of his head, lingering there for a moment. “Something‘s wrong, hm? Even if we’re… you can still tell me. I’ll always be here for you,” she whispered, leaning her head against his. She just wants to know what’s plaguing his mind— what’s taking him away from her.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus squeezed his shoulders at the kiss, his cheeks warming despite himself. "I don't know if it's really the right time," he mumbled, picking at his nails. "I want to see if I can take care of it myself first...maybe figure out how to put an end to it during our break."

It would be safer, he thought, because then she wouldn't be dragged into it. Not completely.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily couldn’t help but envelope his hand into hers, avoiding him making his hands stained with specks of blood. She placed yet another gentle kiss upon his head— she can’t help but take care of him it seems. “That’s alright, love,” she said with a sigh, although it was reassuring.

“but please, if you need financial help, physically help, or just— whatever, please tell me?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

He wasn't sure he could agree with that or promise, but Severus still nodded. Maybe...somewhere along the way, he'd lose enough pride and fear. "I'll... try. I'll try." He settled, sighing softly. "I'm sorry."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”for?” Lily replied gently. Her anger had partially subsided— yes, she was still mad about the funeral but… she can’t come up with an excuse for him. “Mum had a lovely funeral, by the way. Petunia, she did great,” she huffed slightly, she never liked to admit if petunia did something well.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Just...not being there for you," he murmured, "You're always there for me, but I didn't show up when you needed me the most. That's the worst mistake I've ever made, and I'm sorry."

Severus tilted his head to the side, smiling a little at that. "I'm glad some things went well, at least..."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily stared at her feet, taking another deep breath. This could go either way; he accepts it, or he fights it. Which she’d rather him do, she doesn’t know. “Can we talk? About… us? Maybe it’s better if we..” she trailed off, leaving the question open for interpretation.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus lifted his head to rest his chin on the table. He looked like he'd sucked a lemon — eyes crinkled and squinting because of the tears he was holding back. "If you want," he swallowed, wiping his eyes quickly with his sleeve.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily tiptoed over, swallowing down any remaining tears that threatened to spill. She sat next to him again, taking one of his hands into hers. She hated to see him cry (even if the tears hadn’t fallen yet) and it was worse that she was the cause of his tears.

A mantra played in her head:‘Be strong for him, Lily. You’re the one causing this.’ The voice not leaving. The voice reminding her of what she’s doing. Months of a loving relationship between them was going to waste. she hadn’t felt close to the boy in weeks— constant excuses of ‘I need to go to work, sorry’, ‘Lucius needs me, I’ll be back soon’, and ‘I can’t make it tonight, I have something to do’ constantly echoed in her mind.

“I think it’s best if we… if we take a break,” she said quietly, the soul of their relationship breaking into the air, shattering into a million pieces.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus froze. His eyes were stuck on where their hands met, and his breath hitched completely in his chest. But instead of trying to speak, he nodded. He squeezed her hand softly, tears finally rolling down his face.

He felt horrible crying like that. He didn't want her to feel like she needed to keep comforting him. "It's okay," Severus mumbled, taking his hand out of hers. "That's...fine. Sorry, give me a second," he wiped the tears on his cheeks away and looked up at the ceiling. "Fuck, s-sorry, I swear I'm not trying to make it harder. I don't know why I can't pull myself together."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily had to look away for a second to regain her cracking composure. Would she take this back if she could? Yes. Does she regret it? Again, yes. But is it the best for them? Maybe..

“hey, it’s okay,” she murmured, her hand ghosting over his shoulder, wanting to comfort him. “It’s just a break, mhm? W-we can get through this, sev. I know you’re just… so busy, and I don’t want to hold you back from doing your job,” she breathed, quickly wiping her eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Hold me back?" Severus laughed sadly, "You never held me back, Lily... I just didn't want to depend on you so much and...wear you out," he shrugged his shoulders, lowering his head again just as his smile dropped. "And I know that we've talked about it before, but I guess I was more worried about you being held back by me."

His lips trembled, "I didn't know that I was hurting you in the process."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

“Wear me out? Never, you never did,” Lily sighed softly, tucking a stray hair behind Severus’s ear. “We’ve just… not spent much time together in what—“ she looked down at her fingers, counting for a moment, “5 weeks? I know we’ve been busy with school, you with work…” she trailed off.

“I just want to spend time with you,” Lily whispered, her voice breaking mid sentence.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus rubbed his wrists nervously, trying to figure out if he could tell her what was really happening or not. He ultimately chose against it and simply nodded again. "I know, I'm sorry. I should've tried a little harder. I don't...um really know how to juggle everything yet..."

He exhaled, looking at the floor. "This is a mess,"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”indeed, a mess,” Lily laughed wetly. “You need the money, and I don’t want to… pressurise you, so maybe it’s the best?” She murmured, turning his head towards her, staring into his eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

He still couldn't look at her completely, only a quick glance and he was ready to start bawling his eyes out. He could've vented, she wanted to be there for him, but what if he just messed things up more? Severus finally managed to whisper a small 'yeah' before resting his head on her shoulder. "For the best..."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily placed a kiss on top of his head, lingering there for a moment. “Something‘s wrong, hm? Even if we’re… you can still tell me. I’ll always be here for you,” she whispered, leaning her head against his. She just wants to know what’s plaguing his mind— what’s taking him away from her.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus squeezed his shoulders at the kiss, his cheeks warming despite himself. "I don't know if it's really the right time," he mumbled, picking at his nails. "I want to see if I can take care of it myself first...maybe figure out how to put an end to it during our break."

It would be safer, he thought, because then she wouldn't be dragged into it. Not completely.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily couldn’t help but envelope his hand into hers, avoiding him making his hands stained with specks of blood. She placed yet another gentle kiss upon his head— she can’t help but take care of him it seems. “That’s alright, love,” she said with a sigh, although it was reassuring.

“but please, if you need financial help, physically help, or just— whatever, please tell me?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

He wasn't sure he could agree with that or promise, but Severus still nodded. Maybe...somewhere along the way, he'd lose enough pride and fear. "I'll... try. I'll try." He settled, sighing softly. "I'm sorry."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily stared at her feet, taking another deep breath. This could go either way; he accepts it, or he fights it. Which she’d rather him do, she doesn’t know. “Can we talk? About… us? Maybe it’s better if we..” she trailed off, leaving the question open for interpretation.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus lifted his head to rest his chin on the table. He looked like he'd sucked a lemon — eyes crinkled and squinting because of the tears he was holding back. "If you want," he swallowed, wiping his eyes quickly with his sleeve.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily tiptoed over, swallowing down any remaining tears that threatened to spill. She sat next to him again, taking one of his hands into hers. She hated to see him cry (even if the tears hadn’t fallen yet) and it was worse that she was the cause of his tears.

A mantra played in her head:‘Be strong for him, Lily. You’re the one causing this.’ The voice not leaving. The voice reminding her of what she’s doing. Months of a loving relationship between them was going to waste. she hadn’t felt close to the boy in weeks— constant excuses of ‘I need to go to work, sorry’, ‘Lucius needs me, I’ll be back soon’, and ‘I can’t make it tonight, I have something to do’ constantly echoed in her mind.

“I think it’s best if we… if we take a break,” she said quietly, the soul of their relationship breaking into the air, shattering into a million pieces.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus froze. His eyes were stuck on where their hands met, and his breath hitched completely in his chest. But instead of trying to speak, he nodded. He squeezed her hand softly, tears finally rolling down his face.

He felt horrible crying like that. He didn't want her to feel like she needed to keep comforting him. "It's okay," Severus mumbled, taking his hand out of hers. "That's...fine. Sorry, give me a second," he wiped the tears on his cheeks away and looked up at the ceiling. "Fuck, s-sorry, I swear I'm not trying to make it harder. I don't know why I can't pull myself together."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily had to look away for a second to regain her cracking composure. Would she take this back if she could? Yes. Does she regret it? Again, yes. But is it the best for them? Maybe..

“hey, it’s okay,” she murmured, her hand ghosting over his shoulder, wanting to comfort him. “It’s just a break, mhm? W-we can get through this, sev. I know you’re just… so busy, and I don’t want to hold you back from doing your job,” she breathed, quickly wiping her eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Hold me back?" Severus laughed sadly, "You never held me back, Lily... I just didn't want to depend on you so much and...wear you out," he shrugged his shoulders, lowering his head again just as his smile dropped. "And I know that we've talked about it before, but I guess I was more worried about you being held back by me."

His lips trembled, "I didn't know that I was hurting you in the process."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

“Wear me out? Never, you never did,” Lily sighed softly, tucking a stray hair behind Severus’s ear. “We’ve just… not spent much time together in what—“ she looked down at her fingers, counting for a moment, “5 weeks? I know we’ve been busy with school, you with work…” she trailed off.

“I just want to spend time with you,” Lily whispered, her voice breaking mid sentence.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus rubbed his wrists nervously, trying to figure out if he could tell her what was really happening or not. He ultimately chose against it and simply nodded again. "I know, I'm sorry. I should've tried a little harder. I don't...um really know how to juggle everything yet..."

He exhaled, looking at the floor. "This is a mess,"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”indeed, a mess,” Lily laughed wetly. “You need the money, and I don’t want to… pressurise you, so maybe it’s the best?” She murmured, turning his head towards her, staring into his eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

He still couldn't look at her completely, only a quick glance and he was ready to start bawling his eyes out. He could've vented, she wanted to be there for him, but what if he just messed things up more? Severus finally managed to whisper a small 'yeah' before resting his head on her shoulder. "For the best..."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily placed a kiss on top of his head, lingering there for a moment. “Something‘s wrong, hm? Even if we’re… you can still tell me. I’ll always be here for you,” she whispered, leaning her head against his. She just wants to know what’s plaguing his mind— what’s taking him away from her.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus squeezed his shoulders at the kiss, his cheeks warming despite himself. "I don't know if it's really the right time," he mumbled, picking at his nails. "I want to see if I can take care of it myself first...maybe figure out how to put an end to it during our break."

It would be safer, he thought, because then she wouldn't be dragged into it. Not completely.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily stared at her feet, taking another deep breath. This could go either way; he accepts it, or he fights it. Which she’d rather him do, she doesn’t know. “Can we talk? About… us? Maybe it’s better if we..” she trailed off, leaving the question open for interpretation.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus lifted his head to rest his chin on the table. He looked like he'd sucked a lemon — eyes crinkled and squinting because of the tears he was holding back. "If you want," he swallowed, wiping his eyes quickly with his sleeve.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily tiptoed over, swallowing down any remaining tears that threatened to spill. She sat next to him again, taking one of his hands into hers. She hated to see him cry (even if the tears hadn’t fallen yet) and it was worse that she was the cause of his tears.

A mantra played in her head:‘Be strong for him, Lily. You’re the one causing this.’ The voice not leaving. The voice reminding her of what she’s doing. Months of a loving relationship between them was going to waste. she hadn’t felt close to the boy in weeks— constant excuses of ‘I need to go to work, sorry’, ‘Lucius needs me, I’ll be back soon’, and ‘I can’t make it tonight, I have something to do’ constantly echoed in her mind.

“I think it’s best if we… if we take a break,” she said quietly, the soul of their relationship breaking into the air, shattering into a million pieces.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus froze. His eyes were stuck on where their hands met, and his breath hitched completely in his chest. But instead of trying to speak, he nodded. He squeezed her hand softly, tears finally rolling down his face.

He felt horrible crying like that. He didn't want her to feel like she needed to keep comforting him. "It's okay," Severus mumbled, taking his hand out of hers. "That's...fine. Sorry, give me a second," he wiped the tears on his cheeks away and looked up at the ceiling. "Fuck, s-sorry, I swear I'm not trying to make it harder. I don't know why I can't pull myself together."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily had to look away for a second to regain her cracking composure. Would she take this back if she could? Yes. Does she regret it? Again, yes. But is it the best for them? Maybe..

“hey, it’s okay,” she murmured, her hand ghosting over his shoulder, wanting to comfort him. “It’s just a break, mhm? W-we can get through this, sev. I know you’re just… so busy, and I don’t want to hold you back from doing your job,” she breathed, quickly wiping her eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Hold me back?" Severus laughed sadly, "You never held me back, Lily... I just didn't want to depend on you so much and...wear you out," he shrugged his shoulders, lowering his head again just as his smile dropped. "And I know that we've talked about it before, but I guess I was more worried about you being held back by me."

His lips trembled, "I didn't know that I was hurting you in the process."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

“Wear me out? Never, you never did,” Lily sighed softly, tucking a stray hair behind Severus’s ear. “We’ve just… not spent much time together in what—“ she looked down at her fingers, counting for a moment, “5 weeks? I know we’ve been busy with school, you with work…” she trailed off.

“I just want to spend time with you,” Lily whispered, her voice breaking mid sentence.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus rubbed his wrists nervously, trying to figure out if he could tell her what was really happening or not. He ultimately chose against it and simply nodded again. "I know, I'm sorry. I should've tried a little harder. I don't...um really know how to juggle everything yet..."

He exhaled, looking at the floor. "This is a mess,"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”indeed, a mess,” Lily laughed wetly. “You need the money, and I don’t want to… pressurise you, so maybe it’s the best?” She murmured, turning his head towards her, staring into his eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

He still couldn't look at her completely, only a quick glance and he was ready to start bawling his eyes out. He could've vented, she wanted to be there for him, but what if he just messed things up more? Severus finally managed to whisper a small 'yeah' before resting his head on her shoulder. "For the best..."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily stared at her feet, taking another deep breath. This could go either way; he accepts it, or he fights it. Which she’d rather him do, she doesn’t know. “Can we talk? About… us? Maybe it’s better if we..” she trailed off, leaving the question open for interpretation.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus lifted his head to rest his chin on the table. He looked like he'd sucked a lemon — eyes crinkled and squinting because of the tears he was holding back. "If you want," he swallowed, wiping his eyes quickly with his sleeve.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily tiptoed over, swallowing down any remaining tears that threatened to spill. She sat next to him again, taking one of his hands into hers. She hated to see him cry (even if the tears hadn’t fallen yet) and it was worse that she was the cause of his tears.

A mantra played in her head:‘Be strong for him, Lily. You’re the one causing this.’ The voice not leaving. The voice reminding her of what she’s doing. Months of a loving relationship between them was going to waste. she hadn’t felt close to the boy in weeks— constant excuses of ‘I need to go to work, sorry’, ‘Lucius needs me, I’ll be back soon’, and ‘I can’t make it tonight, I have something to do’ constantly echoed in her mind.

“I think it’s best if we… if we take a break,” she said quietly, the soul of their relationship breaking into the air, shattering into a million pieces.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus froze. His eyes were stuck on where their hands met, and his breath hitched completely in his chest. But instead of trying to speak, he nodded. He squeezed her hand softly, tears finally rolling down his face.

He felt horrible crying like that. He didn't want her to feel like she needed to keep comforting him. "It's okay," Severus mumbled, taking his hand out of hers. "That's...fine. Sorry, give me a second," he wiped the tears on his cheeks away and looked up at the ceiling. "Fuck, s-sorry, I swear I'm not trying to make it harder. I don't know why I can't pull myself together."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily had to look away for a second to regain her cracking composure. Would she take this back if she could? Yes. Does she regret it? Again, yes. But is it the best for them? Maybe..

“hey, it’s okay,” she murmured, her hand ghosting over his shoulder, wanting to comfort him. “It’s just a break, mhm? W-we can get through this, sev. I know you’re just… so busy, and I don’t want to hold you back from doing your job,” she breathed, quickly wiping her eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Hold me back?" Severus laughed sadly, "You never held me back, Lily... I just didn't want to depend on you so much and...wear you out," he shrugged his shoulders, lowering his head again just as his smile dropped. "And I know that we've talked about it before, but I guess I was more worried about you being held back by me."

His lips trembled, "I didn't know that I was hurting you in the process."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

“Wear me out? Never, you never did,” Lily sighed softly, tucking a stray hair behind Severus’s ear. “We’ve just… not spent much time together in what—“ she looked down at her fingers, counting for a moment, “5 weeks? I know we’ve been busy with school, you with work…” she trailed off.

“I just want to spend time with you,” Lily whispered, her voice breaking mid sentence.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus rubbed his wrists nervously, trying to figure out if he could tell her what was really happening or not. He ultimately chose against it and simply nodded again. "I know, I'm sorry. I should've tried a little harder. I don't...um really know how to juggle everything yet..."

He exhaled, looking at the floor. "This is a mess,"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily stared at her feet, taking another deep breath. This could go either way; he accepts it, or he fights it. Which she’d rather him do, she doesn’t know. “Can we talk? About… us? Maybe it’s better if we..” she trailed off, leaving the question open for interpretation.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus lifted his head to rest his chin on the table. He looked like he'd sucked a lemon — eyes crinkled and squinting because of the tears he was holding back. "If you want," he swallowed, wiping his eyes quickly with his sleeve.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily tiptoed over, swallowing down any remaining tears that threatened to spill. She sat next to him again, taking one of his hands into hers. She hated to see him cry (even if the tears hadn’t fallen yet) and it was worse that she was the cause of his tears.

A mantra played in her head:‘Be strong for him, Lily. You’re the one causing this.’ The voice not leaving. The voice reminding her of what she’s doing. Months of a loving relationship between them was going to waste. she hadn’t felt close to the boy in weeks— constant excuses of ‘I need to go to work, sorry’, ‘Lucius needs me, I’ll be back soon’, and ‘I can’t make it tonight, I have something to do’ constantly echoed in her mind.

“I think it’s best if we… if we take a break,” she said quietly, the soul of their relationship breaking into the air, shattering into a million pieces.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus froze. His eyes were stuck on where their hands met, and his breath hitched completely in his chest. But instead of trying to speak, he nodded. He squeezed her hand softly, tears finally rolling down his face.

He felt horrible crying like that. He didn't want her to feel like she needed to keep comforting him. "It's okay," Severus mumbled, taking his hand out of hers. "That's...fine. Sorry, give me a second," he wiped the tears on his cheeks away and looked up at the ceiling. "Fuck, s-sorry, I swear I'm not trying to make it harder. I don't know why I can't pull myself together."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily had to look away for a second to regain her cracking composure. Would she take this back if she could? Yes. Does she regret it? Again, yes. But is it the best for them? Maybe..

“hey, it’s okay,” she murmured, her hand ghosting over his shoulder, wanting to comfort him. “It’s just a break, mhm? W-we can get through this, sev. I know you’re just… so busy, and I don’t want to hold you back from doing your job,” she breathed, quickly wiping her eyes.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Hold me back?" Severus laughed sadly, "You never held me back, Lily... I just didn't want to depend on you so much and...wear you out," he shrugged his shoulders, lowering his head again just as his smile dropped. "And I know that we've talked about it before, but I guess I was more worried about you being held back by me."

His lips trembled, "I didn't know that I was hurting you in the process."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily stared at her feet, taking another deep breath. This could go either way; he accepts it, or he fights it. Which she’d rather him do, she doesn’t know. “Can we talk? About… us? Maybe it’s better if we..” she trailed off, leaving the question open for interpretation.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus lifted his head to rest his chin on the table. He looked like he'd sucked a lemon — eyes crinkled and squinting because of the tears he was holding back. "If you want," he swallowed, wiping his eyes quickly with his sleeve.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily tiptoed over, swallowing down any remaining tears that threatened to spill. She sat next to him again, taking one of his hands into hers. She hated to see him cry (even if the tears hadn’t fallen yet) and it was worse that she was the cause of his tears.

A mantra played in her head:‘Be strong for him, Lily. You’re the one causing this.’ The voice not leaving. The voice reminding her of what she’s doing. Months of a loving relationship between them was going to waste. she hadn’t felt close to the boy in weeks— constant excuses of ‘I need to go to work, sorry’, ‘Lucius needs me, I’ll be back soon’, and ‘I can’t make it tonight, I have something to do’ constantly echoed in her mind.

“I think it’s best if we… if we take a break,” she said quietly, the soul of their relationship breaking into the air, shattering into a million pieces.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus froze. His eyes were stuck on where their hands met, and his breath hitched completely in his chest. But instead of trying to speak, he nodded. He squeezed her hand softly, tears finally rolling down his face.

He felt horrible crying like that. He didn't want her to feel like she needed to keep comforting him. "It's okay," Severus mumbled, taking his hand out of hers. "That's...fine. Sorry, give me a second," he wiped the tears on his cheeks away and looked up at the ceiling. "Fuck, s-sorry, I swear I'm not trying to make it harder. I don't know why I can't pull myself together."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily stared at her feet, taking another deep breath. This could go either way; he accepts it, or he fights it. Which she’d rather him do, she doesn’t know. “Can we talk? About… us? Maybe it’s better if we..” she trailed off, leaving the question open for interpretation.

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus lifted his head to rest his chin on the table. He looked like he'd sucked a lemon — eyes crinkled and squinting because of the tears he was holding back. "If you want," he swallowed, wiping his eyes quickly with his sleeve.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily waited in the shadows of the door for a moment, listening to his quiet muttering. She took a deep breath, thinking of her next move, ‘Should she? Should she not? Why not-‘ she was thinking of this for a while. Their relationship hasn’t been the same recently, but she just could not let him go. She walked back in, clearing her throat to make herself known. “Severus..?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

The boy let his head stay down for a few seconds after she called his name. Then, a large sniffle came from him. "YOu DonT HaVe TO STicK ArOuND," he warbled, "It's— ahem — it's alright if you need time. No need to feel bad, really. I have no excuses."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”but you wasn’t there when I needed you,” Lily replied after a moment, glancing toward the library door. She rose from her seat, collecting her bag and books along the way, and took one last look at the boy who was “always there for her” and murmured a quick, “it’s fine, I guess.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus wanted to stand up and follow her, but something in his gut told him to let her go. Just...for now, until everything felt easier to talk about again. He curled in on himself, letting his head drop to the table once she was out the door. "Well aren't you a piece of clogged shit, Severus ?" he grunted.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief. “Did you not want to come?” She asked, laughing incredulously. She leaned back in her chair, brushing her hands over her face. She sighed, looking back at him. “I defended you in front of Petunia, and you know how she gets. Even Vernon turned up and he couldn’t be arsed to be there!” She spat, her eyes welling with tears of anger.

“if you didn’t want to come, you should’ve said, Severus.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"It's not that I didn't want to come, Lily," Severus pleaded, trying to form words that wouldn't make it seem like he was guilt-tripping her. "I don't know how to explain it— I-I don't even think I can right now. I did want to be there, I always am there for you—" but he wasn't there when she needed him the most.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Lily.."

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

Lily shook her head in disbelief, scoffing at his lack of remembrance. “I had to go all alone! I convinced petunia that you were busy but no— you forgot!” Her voice cracked slightly, the usual sweet tone was annoyed and angry.

“if you still can’t remember,” she said with a scoff, “it was mum’s funeral. Remember now?” She looked up at him, her eyes full with hurt, “you promised to come?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus's heart dropped. He clapped his hand over his mouth, shock displayed on his face. "Oh, God," he mumbled, shaking his head slowly before bringing his hand away from his lips. "No— nonono, I didn't- I didn't mean to forget, I was—"

What could he say? That he was too busy to leave Lucius' side? Not even for his girlfriend? He was working, again? Nothing sounded fair. "I don't...have any excuses." Severus whispered.

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

(Hehe in the library because I’m impatientttt)

Lily was leaned against a table, the dim flicker of the sporadic lights lit up her face. She was.. sad, shall we say — she didn’t think he’d forget. But it turns out, Severus did indeed forget about her mother’s funeral, or did he just not bother to turn up?

she watched as he walked towards her swiftly, an unreadable expression on his face. “hey, sev,” she said with a sigh.

@bitterandbruisedsev

[bitterandbruisedsev]

Severus pulled out a chair next to Lily, sitting down with a heavy sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Hey," he mumbled, catching her expression with a raised brow. "Are you alright? What's with the frown?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”no, I’m not alright,” she huffed, her jaw clenched slightly with irritation. “You’ve been… off recently,” she sighed, looking down, picking at her nails. “And you forgot something really important.”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

His eyes blinked wide before settling, almost relaxed and unworried. "Off?" He scoffed, leaning back in his seat to cross his arms over his chest. Has he really been weird? "What did I forget?"

[miss-lily-evans-potter]

”yes, off,” she persisted with a scoff, mirroring his demeanour. She couldn’t believe him. How on earth could he forget the funeral? Her mum saw him like a son, and yet he forgot!? “Think, Severus,” she said, her tone icy, “what did you forget?”

[bitterandbruisedsev]

"Woah—" Severus held up both of his hands, slowly starting to realize that he did something wrong. But he didn't know what. "I don't know? I— I don't think I've missed out on anything..."

His eyes drifted to a corner as he thought harder. "I don't understand. What's all of this about?"