moved to desecratedvalor

hella private, hella selective, hella not canon compliant indie felicity smoak. sideblog to desecratedvalor.

[desecratedvalor]

putting trini & felicity on hiatus because the muse just isn’t there right now.

[blondecyberterrorist]

“i love you so much, i forgot what hating myself felt like.”

hurt meme / @elenaloveablekotsala

Felicity pressed her lips together, tilting her head to the side. “Hey.” She climbed into Leo’s lap, wrapping her arms around his neck. “I love you.” She rested her forehead against his. “Whatever it is you’re going through, I’m here. And I’m not going anywhere.”

[tychememes-blog]

author: lostcap  /  poems used: x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x  * do not remove this credit , thank you.

❛ what a modern fucking tragedy you turned out to be. ❜ ❛ what do you think the stars wish for then? ❜ ❛ maybe i could have loved you in any life but ours. ❜ ❛ i used to ache for a hurricane, an earthquake. ❜ ❛ i found a catalyst for disaster in you. ❜ ❛ is this what happens when the poem ends? ❜ ❛ i found religion in betrayal. ❜ ❛ things like us only exist in dreams. ❜ ❛ you can’t give your storms to someone else. ❜ ❛ nothing lasts forever, not even the rain. ❜ ❛ it’s okay to fear. ❜ ❛ don’t claw out your own throat while waiting for someone else to scream. ❜ ❛ you are memories and moments. ❜ ❛ in some other universe you’re asleep. ❜ ❛ everyone leaves. let them. ❜ ❛ you are not a ghost.  ❜ ❛ you can’t haunt those that forget you. ❜ ❛ everything ends and it’s okay. ❜ ❛ my heart kept beating, out of sync with yours. ❜ ❛ maybe i get to have a reason for the ache you left in my chest. ❜ ❛ you exist still. ❜ ❛ we can’t remember how to be alive. ❜ ❛ the heavens burn for you and i. ❜ ❛ every star is another story, every night a different sky. ❜ ❛ we end to begin again. ❜ ❛ beyond every somewhere, we exist. ❜ ❛ the gods lie as often as men. ❜ ❛ i sit not upon a throne of bone. ❜ ❛ my kingdom wasn’t chosen. ❜ ❛ the dead of mine do not speak. ❜ ❛ history will write that you were the bravest of them all. ❜ ❛ all stars must burn. ❜ ❛ the greatest things must end. ❜ ❛ hell is just another place i guess i’ll go to keep you warm. ❜ ❛ if the monster always dies at the end of the book, why am i still alive? ❜ ❛ gods don’t care about what might have been. ❜ ❛ men shall fall and gods be forgotten. ❜ ❛ you will be remembered eternally. ❜

[blondecyberterrorist]

thedamaged0ne

He let her babble her nervousness out, and chuckled when she was unvoluntarily complimenting his looks during that whole babble session. But he didn’t stop her and was as nice as possible to reassure her when he could finally place a word in. ❝ Hey, you have nothing to be nervous about, I assure you. I will simply say, one, thank you for the compliment — ❞ he chuckled softly and added  ❝ and two, you have nothing to worry about. This person, the name on the paper, is my long lost brother. I haven’t seen him in a very long time, and when I heard he was still alive, I just needed to find him. And I needed to find someone to help me find him — ❞ he figured she deserved a little bit more story to go with his request, even if she agreed at the end to do it, he somehow trusted her with some more personal details.  ❝ if you have any questions about the whole thing, feel free to ask. I’m an open book from now on. ❞

God, she could be such an idiot. She couldn’t believe that she said that. She laughed nervously, silently wishing she was dead. She ran her fingers through her hair, clearing her throat. Long lost brother. Oh god, there was a brother? Who probably looked just as good as he does? She pursed her lips together. “I’m not going to pry,” she held her hands up before he could insist. “I’ll find an address. It won’t take me long but if you have somewhere else to be...” she trailed off, focusing on her computer. She could deal with computers better than people most days. She wasn’t sure what that said about her. It didn’t take many keystrokes before she found a recent address. She wrote it down, along with a phone number that she had found. 

[inboxideas]

".....has died." finish it in my ask.

[blondecyberterrorist]

elenaloveablekotsala

“ I do not tease babe, I am enjoying it, it has been  a long time since I last saw you and I plan of making the most of this night, “his lower lips sucked hers slowly, as then moved to leave a trail of kisses down her neck, he was letting loose, letting himself sink into her body, as his manhood pushed deeper and harder this time, feeling her walls close around it, he swallows hard and lips found her cleavage, as his hands run down from her hands and then to her legs.

He wanted for the night to last forever, he was afraid of sleeping, but next to her, he was calmer, he felt safe, he did not have to worry, thoughts pushed to the corner of his mind, as his lips return back to find hers, tongue sliding inside her mouth, letting it dance with her.

A soft sigh slipped from her lips as he kissed along her neck. Her hands coasted along his skin, nails leaving trails of red marks. She rolled her hips in time with his thrusts, her bottom lip disappearing behind a row of teeth. It had been far too long since they had done this. She had completely forgotten what his touch felt like. What it was like to be this close to him. She tipped her head up as his lips moved back up to hers. She moaned against his mouth, teeth nipping at his tongue playfully. Her fingers tangled in his hair and she pulled him closer.

[justawaterbendingwaitress-deact]

My muse has been missing and is presumed dead. Your muse comes home to find them asleep in their bed. How do they respond?

[sandcvstles]

hurt meme.

“ i got you. it’s gonna be okay, you’re going to be okay.”

“i feel like everyone’s miles away from me.”

“my mind is a dark place. you don’t want to be there.”

“i know this hurts, but you have to stay awake.”

“don’t close your eyes, please don’t close your eyes!”

“i just want to be numb, i don’t want to feel anything.”

“please don’t do this, don’t act like you care.”

“you don’t care, nobody cares, just leave.”

“you’re my friend, of course i fucking care.”

“i can’t give up on you, so please don’t give up on yourself.”

“i love you so much, i forgot what hating myself felt like.”

“i fucked up, why do you not care?”

“i can’t walk, just go on without me.”

“you have broken ribs, take it easy.”

“i have no idea how to do cpr.”

“whose blood is that?”

“apply pressure to the wound, don’t let go.”

“don’t you dare fucking let go!” 

“what the hell happened to you?” 

“are they dead? did you kill them?” 

“do you know what you’ve done?” 

“you’re either with me or against me.” 

“who the hell did this to you?” 

“are you alright? you hit your head pretty hard…” 

“i can’t see!! what’s happening to me?” 

“when was the last time you ate?” 

“what do you mean you’re fine? you are not fine!” 

 “i’m fine, it’s just a flesh wound, i’ll be okay.” 

“for how long? how long were you bottling this up?“ 

“there’s so much blood, you won’t last.” 

“are you… throwing up in there?” 

“why aren’t you eating?” 

“just breathe… you’re okay, i promise, just breathe.” 

“i can’t breathe, i can’t –” 

“i woke up, & you were gone.” 

“just tell me something, was it really worth it?” 

"it’s okay to hurt & breakdown. you don’t have to be strong all the time.”

[the-queenfamily-blog]

A little TLC

[blondecyberterrorist]

the-queenfamily

He was just walking back from changing into the leather pants and out of his cut off sweats. He was slipping a white tee over his head when he hear Felicity call out. Oliver changed direction slightly taking a step toward the platform. He rested against the railing. “No but the others should be in soon. We can start patrolling the streets when they get here.” 

He crossed his arms and propped his head in between the bars of the railing. “I’m sorry for fussing over you. Apparently habits are hard to break and when you’re hurt at my hand..? I’m sorry if I over stepped.” Oliver felt like he was in limbo, sure they had sorted things between them but they weren’t together or anything. They were just back in this limbo of knowing they both loved each other but were keeping distance. 

Felicity nodded her head at his apology. “I shouldn’t have been rude,” she replied, offering him a tiny smile. “I’m sorry. You didn’t overstep I was just being...sensitive,” she finished with a small shrug of her shoulders. She turned her attention back to her computer. Things between them were better than they were, yet it still felt awkward. She loved him but she knew they couldn’t go back to the way things were. And she wasn’t sure if she wanted to find another way to make it work. 

She heard footsteps and she glanced over at Oliver. “Just be careful out there.”

[the-queenfamily-blog]

Hoping for the best

[blondecyberterrorist]

the-queenfamily

Her mom’s chest was shaking, like she was talking but when Kali looked at her face her mouth wasn’t moving. Puzzled for a moment, Kali pressed her hands closer as her mom covered both her small hands with one of her own. She remembered her mom telling her it was sounds she couldn’t hear but ones she could feel. The young girl made a vibration in her own throat, copying what she thought her mom was doing.

When her mom’s fingers carded through her hair, the young girl slid closer to curl up against her mother’s chest. The soft fabric of her mom’s shirt mixed with the soft vibration from her mother shaking was comforting even though she was scared. She pressed an ear that would never hear the hum her mother made against her mom’s chest in effort to feel it better. Kali grabbed her mother’s hand and held it against her own chest. She copied what her mother did on and off. Hoping that she could make her mom feel safe too. 

Felicity was surprised when Kali began to mimic her but it was a nice surprise given the situation that they were in. She closed her eyes and continued to hum, finding some small comfort in the way that Kali copied her. They were going to be okay. They had to be okay. She was sure that Oliver was already trying to find them. She had to have hope, if not for her sake then for Kali’s. She gave Kali’s hand a gentle squeeze. 

The blonde started to rock from side to side. It didn’t do much for her concussion, but the movement was still soothing. If she kept her eyes closed, she could almost pretend that they were home and they were safe. She felt her heart rate slow down and she sucked in a few deep breaths. When she opened her eyes, she took in their surroundings. Details. It was about details.

[blondecyberterrorist]

elenaloveablekotsala

“ Probably you, that is what you mean “ his tone a teasing one, as his smile was wide and warm reaching his ears, it was genuine and he did not recall the last time he had one, it was mainly when they would be talking on Skype, which had taken forever for her to teach him, he had prefered the old fashioned way of letters. Which at first they did, he had all of them, he is picking her up from the couch, leaning to give her a kiss as he is making his way to the bedroom.

“ Your wish is my command babe, “ he nuzzles her nose with his, closing the door behind them once he is inside with her, he lays her down in bed, removing his boxers as he is on top of her, his hands move to hold hers over her head as he leans in to give her another kiss, more deep, and then his hand runs down her thigh , as he slowly pushes himself inside of her, as he is deepening the kiss.

She would definitely be the one to fall off the couch. And she would get injured enough to require medical attention, which would put a huge damper on their reunion. No, it was better to do this on the bed. She was less likely to hurt herself on such a large surface. Felicity squeaked when he lifted her up, wrapping her arms around his neck and digging her fingers into his shoulders. It would really suck if he dropped her.

She kissed and nibbled along his neck before he laid her down on the bed. Her legs wrapped around him, crossed at the ankles, as she returned his kiss eagerly. She let out a loud moan as he pushed inside of her, back arching off the bed. She tugged at his lower lip with her teeth, hips rolling to meet his. “Don’t tease.”

[blondecyberterrorist]

thedamaged0ne

He was trying hard not to burst out laughing, but somehow, he managed to keep his cool ❝ We’re alone in here, sweetheart. No one is ever gonna find you, or bust you for anything you might have done. Well, I haven’t tried the computers, but I’m pretty sure the signal doesn’t cross dimensions. In here, we keep busy the old fashioned ways: Play cards, cook, bust things, pretty much anything you’d wanna do or try, we are free to do. There’s actually an amusement park I’ve been wanting to try out — ❞ he was going down memory lane a little bit, remembering when Bonnie was in here with him. They shared some good times.  ❝ Come on, let’s go find you some hair dye — ❞ he finally said, snapping out of his reminiscing. He turned around and lead the way, not even checking if the blonde was following. The pharmacy was just around the corner anyway.

Old fashioned ways? “You definitely do NOT want me to cook,” she murmured, shaking her head. She would burn down the town if given the chance. Felicity did like the idea of going to an amusement park. She hadn’t been to one of those in years. In fact, she hadn’t gone to one at all until she first went to M.I.T. She opened her mouth to ask him when they could go when she realized that he was already walking away. Huffing out a breath, she hurried to catch up with him. “So,” she began. “Just how long have you been here?” He seemed to know quite a bit. Besides, she wanted to know what her chances were of getting out of here.

[the-queenfamily-blog]

Hoping for the best

[blondecyberterrorist]

the-queenfamily

She held on as her mother pulled her close, the hard floor scratched against her legs and was freezing cold like their basement. Once Kali was tucked into her moms side she turned slightly so she could see her signs. She didn’t want to lie to her mom because she said they needed to be brave but she was terrified. “They didn’t hurt me, but I’m really scared momma. Why did they take us away?” Small hands reached out to fiddle with her mom’s shirt, she needed the comfort of keeping her hands busy.

Felicity wasn’t sure what to tell Kali. She preferred to be honest but she didn’t want to frighten the little girl more than she already was. She settled, instead, on a half-truth. “I don’t know baby.” It wasn’t a complete lie. Felicity had plenty of ideas why they were taken, but she didn’t want to jump to conclusions yet. It was better to wait and see what happened. Maybe it didn’t have anything to do with Oliver. “Everything is going to be okay,” she signed, reaching for Kali’s hands and pressing them to her chest. She started to hum, one hand sliding through her daughter’s hair.

[the-queenfamily-blog]

A little TLC

[blondecyberterrorist]

the-queenfamily

Oliver lifted his hands in surrender and backed away enough that she could turn back around. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry. Continue what you were working on.” The crinkling of wrappers were all that sounded from him as he cleaned up the garbage and put the kit back together. Looking to the suit in the case he decided to suit up, the others would be here to patrol the city soon enough. When it came to her though he couldn’t help it but fuss, which meant he left two aspirins on her workstation as he walked away. On his way back he’d make sure to grab a water from the fridge.

She shot him a look as she turned her chair back around. She tried to focus on what she had been working on but the guilt was beginning to creep up on her. No. No, she didn’t need to feel guilty. He really didn’t need to fuss over here so she shouldn’t feel guilty for shooing him away. Felicity pushed her hair out of her face and rolled her shoulders back. She was beginning to type when he left the aspirin on the desk. She eyed them for a few moments before reaching over and swiping them. She popped them into her mouth and swallowed them dry, clearing her throat after. “Are you going out alone?”

[blondecyberterrorist]

thedamaged0ne

❝ It’s nothing illegal — ❞ he chuckled and nodded, pointing at the piece of paper  ❝ On there is a name of someone.. I used to know, and I would really like to reconnect with him. I’m just looking for an address, basically, so I can go visit him. It’s been way too long — Do you mind doing me this tiny favor? In exchange, I’d fire your supervisor and make you your own boss? How does that sound? ❞ Of course, he would still do those things if she didn’t agree, she was the best at what she did after all. That was the reason he came directly to her for this.

Felicity opened the paper, reading the name written on it. He was just looking for an address? She wondered if the person on the paper would end up dead, would that make her an accessory to murder? Plus, he was sweetening the deal, which just made her more suspicious. She narrowed her eyes, pointing a finger in his direction. “If this person,” she lifted up the paper, “ends up dead, I will throw you under the bus. Figuratively speaking, of course, since you’re bigger than me. Not fatter. You’re clearly not fat. I see plenty of muscles. Damn it,” she cursed softly, pressing her lips together. “Okay, I’ll do it.”

[desecratedvalor]

if your thread isn’t HERE please let me know.

[blondecyberterrorist]

elenaloveablekotsala

“ The nakedness is not that bad either, I mean I could just stare at you for minutes like that babe “ his lips found her ear and moved down her neck, he had dreamt of her as well, them sleeping in the same bed, him waking up next to her, for as long as he was away her thought was giving him the hope and comfort to keep going, “ I like when dreams can come true, like mine did when I met you” he murmured under his breath as his lips found hers, smile lingering on his lips.

He laid her down on the couch as he removed his pants tossing them into the pile with hers, remaining with his boxers, as he was holding her close and his fingers were running down her back, her laughter brought him a warmth he had so much needed.

Felicity laughed again when he said that the nakedness wasn’t bad. He wasn’t wrong. They had been separated for so long, she was beginning to forget what he looked like naked and clothed. Her heart melted as his comment about his dreams coming true. She leaned into his kiss, fingers tugging lightly on his hair. She waited for him to join her on the couch once more, arms wrapping around his neck. Her fingers slid back into his hair as a soft, content sigh left her lips.

She nuzzled her nose against his neck, tongue darting out to press against his pulse point. Her teeth scraped along his skin and she let out a soft moan. “Maybe we should use the bed. One of us is going to fall off this thing.”