Sbinterview With The Trollpire

Interview with the Vampire but make it Homestuck Icon by seraphicsapphics•header by katplanet

[danielmolloystits]

INTRODUCING: BLOODSTUCK

HI. DO YOU LIKE VAMPIRES? DO YOU LIKE HOMESTUCK? DO YOU LIKE ONE OR NONE OF THESE THINGS, YET NEVERTHELESS FIND YOURSELF CURIOUS AS TO WHAT SUCH AN AMBITIOUS AMALGAMATION OF PROPERTIES COULD POSSIBLE ENTAIL?

BOY DO I HAVE THE FIC FOR YOU!!!!

What this is:

A multimedia experience of art, writing, animation, and music

An examination of the Interview with the Vampire canon by a group of multishippers who never quite recovered from their Homestuck days

A crossover that we hope to do justice

A love letter to Vriska Serket

What this isn't:

Something anyone asked for

Sane

A reasonable amount of effort to put into a transformative work

A love letter to Andrew Hussie

This first act was made my myself and @katplanet, though the project itself is the brainchild and heartchild of a number of incredibly talented people (whose work you will soon see!).

You can find it either here on ao3, or receive periodic upd8s by following @blood-stuck

<3

[birchbow]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Chapter 46: Yet, He Speaks

Summary:

mortalRigor [MR] began trolling::group18482392CC [fuckchampion survivorfestapalooza] mortalRigor [MR] has changed the group name::[buckle the fuck up fam shits about to get wild] MR: sssso who would like to know what the fuck gymnabssssolutionisst godspeak got up to on the blessed today???

[blood-stuck]

End of Act One

==> Act Two <== 🏠

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[S] Claudia: Inter

==> End of Act One. <== 🏠

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==>

RV: heads up we’re in different buildings irl RV: so when you get in we won’t be in the same place yet RV: but i’ll still be patched in FE: I’ll be fine, Louis. RV: it can get a little freaky in places RV: quiet and stuff FE: The phone goes two ways, you know. FE: You need an acerbic wit to clear away the cobwebs, say the word. RV: haha thanks sis RV: no one i’d rather end the world with FE: It’s an honor and a privilege. FE: See you on the other side :) ==> [S] Claudia: Inter <== 🏠

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==>

FE: Okay, Alchemiter time. RV: actually first you have to get the rod out of the thing the sprite comes out of FE: I did that. RV: okay so take that to the long skinny machine in the middle and get the captcha card i made you FE: The Totem Lathe. I did that. RV: you used the punched card? FE: I got a Cruxite Dowel from the Cruxtruder, put it in the Totem Lathe, and carved it using the pre-punched captcha card to create a Cruxite Totem, which I am ready to put in the Alchemiter to create my Cruxite Artifact, which I will break to enter the Medium, yes. RV: ok cool ==> <== 🏠

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Claudia: Prototype arm.

Hup. ==> <== 🏠

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Claudia: Retrieve arm from wardrobe.

The things you do for family. ==> Claudia: Prototype arm. <== 🏠

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==>

FE: I was just going to do a necklace. RV: please don’t give them accessories RV: don’t do one of your bugs either RV: last thing we need is imps that fly FE: I haven’t collected mounted insects since I was in middle school. RV: yeah bull and shit RV: do one of your estate sale finds RV: you were scanning the obits page last time i was home so don’t even start FE: Sometimes they have interesting vintage clothes. RV: you think i didn’t clock you coming to visit me right after that anthropology professor died last year RV: i got your number kiddo FE: I thought there might be some interesting resources in his library. RV: interesting twice in two sentences eh FE: Shut up, Louis. RV: nooo i’m not being mean RV: my sister being a weird freak is really coming in clutch at the moment FE: If you can mention some of the benefits to Past Louis, I think my freshman year of high school might turn out a little less humiliating. RV: dude literally everyone thought you were cooler than me FE: That’s not saying much, though, is it. RV: claudia go get the creepiest thing you’ve ever bought from a dead person and throw it in that orb FE: How literally do you want me to take that? RV: uh ==> Claudia: Retrieve arm from wardrobe. <== 🏠

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Claudia: Answer your brother.

-- reticentVampire [RV] began pestering felineEpicurean [FE] at 16:28 -- RV: hey claudia FE: Please tell me the thing you had to aggress was an imp. RV: yeah about that actually RV: did you prototype yet FE: No. I've done basically everything else, but not that. RV: ok cool listen big favor RV: can you prototype one of your weird goth things FE: I have no idea what you're talking about. RV: i’m being serious like RV: don’t pick something cute ==> <== 🏠

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Louis: Check on Claudia.

You can check on yourself, thanks very much. ==> Claudia: Answer your brother. <== 🏠

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==>

RV: your alchemiter or my alchemiter VR: well as you may recall mine has been broken for quite some time RV: nw babe i’ll come up and take a look RV: gotta check on claudia really quick first VR: of course, send my regards!! VR: i love you louis <3 RV: <3 ==> Louis: Check on Claudia. <== 🏠

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==>

VR: ah our growing grist cache informs me that you have defeated your first imp!! VR: félicitations mon cher, once again the fires of my devotion are stoked by your comprehensive competence!! VR: and it comes not a moment too soon, as there seems to be an issue with your alchemiter ==> <== 🏠

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==>

RV: OH FUCK VR: qu'est-ce que c'est?? VR: ???? ==> <== 🏠

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==>

RV: i can come help you out if you need backup VR: nonsense!! we will cover our dormiterritory much more quickly if we are separate RV: like you can do the aggressing since you’re good at it RV: and i can do RV: everything else VR: considerate as always!! but i assure you i am not only good for stabbing and thrusting VR: i am also an eager receptacle for new skills and knowledge!! VR: i have only just begun to demonstrate the many contributions i will make to our team <3 ==> <== 🏠

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==>

RV: you sure VR: perhaps the only thing i have ever been more sure of is my love for you chéri ==> <== 🏠

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==>

-- reticentVampire [RV] began pestering vampireRaconteur [VR] at 16:13 -- RV: hey babe you good VR: mon cher!! bien sûr!! i am having a wonderful time playing this game with you and your various relatives and acquaintances RV: ok cool bc i heard a noise just now VR: i hear only the charming chime that marks your missives. everything is bliss ==> Louis: Look out the window. <== 🏠