what's so great about the mummy 1999?
it is the most wonderfully made, historically inaccurate, giddily fun, perfectly paced, goofy horror movie romance novel bullshit bonanza that has ever blessed the silver screen.
i mean it is just so beautifully full of every genre without being overwhelming.weāve got: comedy, action, suspense, horror, romance, adventure, ancient aesthetics, and itās a period piece. all perfectly balanced and blended into one movie.
and the characters are so LIT
we got our main babe,Ā evelynĀ āmotherfuckingāĀ carnahan, a super-klutz librarian, total history nerd, and certified badass/damsel in distress. she raises the dead on accident, because she cannot resist books, and has the guts to put that motherfucker back where he came from and literally saves the world.evieās greatest hits:Ā
āwhat is a place like me, doing in a girl like this?!ā
*after totally destroying the library*Ā āiāve just made a bit of a mess in the library.ā
āno harm ever came from reading a book.ā
evelyn:Ā *upon opening the tomb* āiāve dreamt about this since i was a little girl.ārick: āyou dream about dead guys?ā
then weāve got rick ābrendan fraserā oāconnell, your not-so-typical battle hardened gun slinger with a heart of gold. he seems filthy, rude, and a complete scoundrel at first, but then he turns into a literal puppy, with massive heart eyes, that worships the ground evie walks on.rickās greatest hits:
*screams at things that are illogical to scream at*
next is our Comedic Relief Characterā¢,Ā jonathan carnahan, who also rises above his trope. heās there for the laugh sure, but is never useless. he actively helps to move the plot along and isnāt justĀ there. he also is the farthest thing from brainless and annoying.jonathanās greatest hits:
evelyn: āhave you no respect for the dead?ājonathan: āof course i do, but sometimes iād rather like to join them.ā same.
oh and that time he was likeĀ āIMHOTEPā and saved his own ass like that was so smooth, yāall know what iām talking about right??
then there is ardeth BAE. he is the audience rolling his eyes because *sighs* white people. heās tired of these motherfucking mummies in this motherfucking desert. literally prettier than everyone.(he has a much bigger role in the mummy returns, but is still so fab here)
and of course THE MUMMY. imhotep. actual emo. literally carved some poetry into the back of his sarcophagus when he was buried alive with flesh eating bugs, because he is that Extraā¢. just wants to bring his girlfriend back to life so he can make out with her without it being treason.Ā
and all the side characters are also gr8.
now i wanna take a moment to talk about the romance. because it is so BEAUTIFUL. like usually in action movies itās macho man undermines girl and they bone. not here. no time for that shit.Ā
rick and evie have such a great relationship based on mutual respect and affection. they both cater to each otherās strengths and cover each otherās weaknesses. they are the literally definition of:Ā āthose two. in a fight, theyāre lethal. around each other, they meltā
what else, i could literally talk about this movie all day.
the special effects have held up pretty well.the music score is GORGEOUS.the costumes are amazing.the makeup, especially for anck su namun, OH WOW.the george of the jungle era brendan fraser sign me the fuck up.rachel weisz.
#i secretly rate every action movie from 0 to the mummy
itās a beautiful mess of a movie that can be enjoyed by people of all ages and transcends time and posterity as the alpha mummy movie, and to those who disagree i beseech you:
titsay
romaincrisis
snowghoul
janainaart
