CATERINA DE MEDICI, FORMER PRINCESS OF FRANCE.
a rueful smile was brought to caterina’s face at the dismissal of the page, brown hues rolling slightly as she spoke her next words in quiet jest, “all the world over knows we share a child. what, do they think giulio was brought in through my window in milan by a stork?” it was nonsense, of course, but their transgressions and beholdence to the pope necessitated at least the image of sanctity, thus a chaperone was usually not far.
my love. the words twisted in her mouth, bringing the taste of bile to the back of her throat. who was she to resist the advances of cesare, a match that would’ve delighted her as a girl? why did every cell in her body push him away, even while the world pushed them closer and closer together? it was the thought of marriage that had ruined him, taken him from a comforting dalliance to someone she was forced to have occupy serious thoughts of her future. it was a sinful thing, to reject something she knew could make her happy, but for all her considerable courage the thought of entering the foreboding institution of marriage again scared her beyond belief.
“you— you’ve what?’ she asked, snapping out of her quiet reverie to probe him for answers, brow knotting together in worry of what her hot-headed lover may have done. “please tell me you’ve not done anything rash mi signorie.” allowing his lips to brush her knuckles, caterina’s fingers tightened around his hand, holding him for just a moment longer before letting go like she’d been shocked by the electric sparks that sometimes danced between them. “your company damages nothing.” she said, posture relaxing a bit as she heard his words, her softer, more empathetic side wishing she had an explanation for him. “do not take me for a fool, for I know what duty binds us. but it is by no fault of your own that we aren’t already wed.” she paused, heartbeat picking up as she attempted to wrangle words from her nervous tongue. loss had marked caterina, leaving her heart a hopeless squire, content to watch others ride off into war as she’d resigned herself to a life of a spinster, but then filled it back up with the love of another— the medici bank. “I suppose I do not feel worthy of a great love anymore.” she mused quietly, to herself, only realizing she’d said it aloud when cesare reacted.
.
The ambassador couldn’t help but laugh at her joke. Her innocence meant the world to him, yet Caterina’s words took some of his seriousness away. With one brow raised and with himself clearing his throat Cesare moved in his chair, Despite knowing Caterina for so long he still felt anxious close to her. Of course current events had only intensified his feelings. Alas, she was right. They’d been together for so long, the obvious, and best, choice would’ve been to marry the woman in front of him, to finally be one, not only for Giulio but for their sake, as well. Cesare stood up then, alarmed by Caterina raising her voice. “Nothing, my lady, I promise,” he murmured against her hand. He didn’t draw his hand away and let her hold onto it for as long as she desired. Any bit of intimacy between them was holy to him. “I’m not instigating a fight with the prince of France,” he almost swore in front of her, but he luckily stopped himself from doing so. With his eyebrows furrowed together Cesare watched his beloved rant like he’d never heard her before. No fault but your own. So Lorenzo was right, after all.
“I must protest,” Cesare breathed heavily now, clearly upset and unable to do anything about it. He could not think one clear thought after her accusation. “You are more,” he abruptly stopped, blinking as if to control his thoughts, “more than I can offer you in return. The moment you left Paris all of France lost its light. What used to be a magnificent city is lost of its magic because you’re gone. I would choose you over everything and everyone, my lady. This. Us.” Cesare tensed his jaw, “I will fight for you, I always will, even if it’s last thing I do. I’m here and you mustn’t be afraid of what’s to come.”








