gentlemen.

BLU's Spy | Profesional Backstabber | Right Behind You | Va te faire enculer Piss-throwing jar men

[bluspycrabs]

Bonjour, étrangers, amis et ennemis. I'm here to make sure my team does not do anything stupid and, if you're lucky, show some photos of Poignardy and Amélie. Try not to pay me any mind, oui?

[girlnephew]

[homunculus-argument]

"That was beneath me" is such a delightfully funny way to apologise. Like yeah I did something shitty that I regret doing, and I'm ready to admit to both of those points, but you're shitting squirrels if you think I'm going to get off my moral high horse to do that.

[that-handsome-rogue]

Bonjour, Red. I will keep this brief for both our sakes. One of my spycrabs seems to have escaped her tank. Have you, by any chance, seen her? - @bluspycrabs

Hm. You’re lucky I have not, Blu. Clearly you’re unable to properly care for her.

If I had, I would’ve lavished her with perfect care just as I do with my crabs.

Hopefully you learn your lesson if you find her.

[bluspycrabs]

Tsk, well, at least you gave an honest answer. Merci bien.

To be quite honest, I would love to see you try, Red. Amélie is a little escape artist. You'd do no better than I at keeping her contained, no matter the quality of care you think you'd give her.

[that-handsome-rogue]

I would not lie when it comes to these crabs. De rien, Blu.

Well, she must be escaping for a reason, no? Your care must not be to her standards. Clearly you don’t have what it takes to care for these creatures. Perhaps I will go look for her so she can live a luxurious life like my Sébastien.

[bluspycrabs]

Fortunately, I have found her since we last talked. Or rather, my Sniper found her stowing away in that van of his. Given the places she goes when she escapes, I rather doubt it has anything to do with my quality of care.

She simply enjoys causing trouble. None of my other spycrabs have ever been as aventureuse as Amélie is and they have all received the same, highest of quality, care.

[bluspycrabs]

The weather is finally getting warm once more. Good. I cannot stand the cold.

[bluspycrabs]

Tsk... Is every Sniper working here the way our and RED's Sniper is, or did we simply get stuck with the most disgusting of the lot?

[sly-daffodils]

omg your outfit... slay king. what are your thoughts on spycrabs?

“This has reminded me of my age…I’m afraid I don’t know what ‘slay king’ means. … haha! This reminds me of my early cadet days when I didn’t know any of the vocabulary! How time flies. …. * ahem * Spy-crabs! I do enjoy them quite a bit…in fact, one in particular has taken a liking to sitting and enjoying a smoke with me. I believe this means we are friends.”

[bluspycrabs]

Hm. Yes, that is an indication of fondness. The yellow ones are quite uncommon, you know. Do take care of it.

[sly-daffodils]

“That’s just wonderful! Oh…I had no idea they were uncommon, see…animals are not my forte…but take care of it I shall, of course. Any friend of mine will be in the best of care while I’m around, regardless of size! Thank you for this insight, Señor Azul!”

[bluspycrabs]

Je vous en prie. Spycrabs are classified as a 'vulnerable' species, you see. Endangered once, but their numbers have been making a slow rise. Any spycrab is rare, but the red and blue variants are far more common. Dominant traits, I believe. Your friend is un diamant parmi les perles, as it were.

If you need any advice on care, my door is open for you. I have raised quite a few spycrabs of my own.

[sly-daffodils]

omg your outfit... slay king. what are your thoughts on spycrabs?

“This has reminded me of my age…I’m afraid I don’t know what ‘slay king’ means. … haha! This reminds me of my early cadet days when I didn’t know any of the vocabulary! How time flies. …. * ahem * Spy-crabs! I do enjoy them quite a bit…in fact, one in particular has taken a liking to sitting and enjoying a smoke with me. I believe this means we are friends.”

[bluspycrabs]

Hm. Yes, that is an indication of fondness. The yellow ones are quite uncommon, you know. Do take care of it.

[bluspycrabs]

Found her. You would never guess where she managed to get herself to. Poignardy doesn't give me half this much trouble...

Regardless, Amélie is now back in her tank, safe and sound.

[bluspycrabs]

Can you be my dad

What? No. You aren't even asking with your actual identity.

[that-handsome-rogue]

Bonjour, Red. I will keep this brief for both our sakes. One of my spycrabs seems to have escaped her tank. Have you, by any chance, seen her? - @bluspycrabs

Hm. You’re lucky I have not, Blu. Clearly you’re unable to properly care for her.

If I had, I would’ve lavished her with perfect care just as I do with my crabs.

Hopefully you learn your lesson if you find her.

[bluspycrabs]

Tsk, well, at least you gave an honest answer. Merci bien.

To be quite honest, I would love to see you try, Red. Amélie is a little escape artist. You'd do no better than I at keeping her contained, no matter the quality of care you think you'd give her.

[bluspycrabs]

If I had a dollar for every idiotic thing my teammates did when I turned my back, I would have enough money that I would not have taken this job.

[bluspycrabs]

Ah. Amélie seems to have escaped her tank. If anyone sees a blue spycrab running about, do let me know. Merci.

[dailyspycrab]

can you give spy crab a little kiss for me?

Day 41 - Kiss!

(thank you for the request! if you want to request an idea for a daily spycrab, press the suggestions button!)