Blue pill or red pill - Jungkook
Description: You're a young girl, who's a little bit introverted and afraid to be under everybody's eyes.
You only have your best friend, but it's ok for you. You don't want to be popular and believe in minimal things.
One day you meet a guy. Or two?
The imagines I used are not mine
Credit to the owners
I hold Jungwook close to my chest as he keeps sleeping. I smile a bit at the memory of last night and at how we cried together. He really let it go out of his body and from his sleeping face, it seems like he finally found the peace.
I'm thinking about y/n. It seems like she was right that night, indeed Jungwook confessed his error. But at this point I'm really scared to meet her. She suffered a lot and I guess she doesn't want any more trouble. I really don't know what to do.
As I keep thinking about the situation, I feel my brother waking up, by rubbing his face on my chest. He looks really cute right now.
"Good morning" I say chuckling a bit. He's just humming and whining a bit and eventually sits up.
"Did you think about what to do?" he asks me with his husky voice. I just nod and pat his head. "Don't tell anyone..." he says, but I'm confused.
"What?" I ask frowning my eyebrows in confusion.
He's blushing so hard and looking away. I still can see his eyes a bit puffy and watery and some tears lines down his cheeks. I just chuckle and nod. I would have never thought that everything would have gone this way.
We got up and had breakfast together. Then he grabs my hand and drags me upstairs inside our room. He makes me sit on my bed and I see him walking towards the closet.
"What are you doing?" I ask scanning every single move that he makes. He doesn't answer, instead he start throwing some clothes on his bed. "Jungwook?"
"You have to meet her. Now." He says still looking at the clothes. I quickly stand up and grab his hand.
"Jungwook....stop." I say serious.
"But you have to, or else it's going to be too late" he says frustrated. Maybe he's doing this because he's feeling guilty and wants to fix everything.
"It's already too late" I say forcing a smile. I didn't want to make him feeling even more guilty and sad, but I had to be straightforward and tell him how things really are.
I see him looking at the ground and after a couple of seconds, starts putting all the clothes back into the closet. He doesn't say a word, but I can feel what his going through thanks to his face expressions. He seems torn.
After a couple of hours, I went to the kitchen and prepared lunch for both of us, while he stayed in our room. I keep calling his name as the lunch is now ready, but no answer. I decide to go to him and tell him that it's time to eat, thinking that he didn't heard me earlier. But as I reach the room, I see him laying on the bed, giving me his back.
"Jungwook, lunch is ready, come downstairs"
What? He's not hungry? He usually eats like a pig and now he doesn't want to eat? What's wrong with him?
"Jungwook what's wrong?" I ask as I sit next to him.
"I just don't feel like eating, right now."
I know what's the real reason, he's just acting all grumpy.
"I'll meet her" I say and I see him quickly sitting up and turning to face me with wide opened eyes.
"Really?" his face is lightened up. I swear, how he changes so quick.
"Yeah, but please come and eat." I say rolling my eyes and smiling a bit at his childish behavior. I see him standing up and hopping out of the room.
"I can't believe him..." I whisper to myself as I keep sitting alone in our bedroom.
Now we're eating happily. Or at least he's all happy and bouncy. On the other side, there's me, nervous and anxious. I'm hesitant to go, but I guess my brother is right. Even if we don't end up together, at least I have to listen to what she has to say.
As we finish eating, I start washing the dishes while Jungwook heads upstairs. Once I'm done, I reach him in our room and see him with some clothes in his hands.
"You have to dress up nicely" he says hopping up and down.
"Ok 'stylist', let me put on what you chose" I say laughing a bit at his excitement.
I start to undress and suddenly I feel some hands on my back. That makes me flinch a bit and I quickly turn around to see Jungwook smirking.
"Seriously, I think you have a really nice body brother!" and with that he starts touching every part of my torso, making me laugh and twist around.
"You look so good!" my brother shouts as he claps his hands happily.
"Now all you have to do is to call y/n and ask her to talk" he then continues, changing his expression into a more serious one.
"But how? I mean, what do I tell her?" I ask a bit nervous.
"I think it's better to talk outside her house. Maybe ask her to meet at a café"
I also think that that's a better idea. I want her to breath fresh air. I also don't know how to act. My brother keeps telling me to be natural, but I don't think that'll work. That's because, when I'm with y/n, I'm usually clingy and touchy and also sweet. So I don't think it's a good idea, considering that we're going to have a serious talk.
I take my phone, open the chat room with y/n and start writing a message:
Hi y/n. It's Jungkook. I hope you're doing fine now. I texted you because I wanted to talk to you. Face to Face obviously. I hope you're free this afternoon and willing to meet me. I'll wait for your answer.
As I send her this, I can feel the nervousness increasing inside me. It's really taking over me. I feel my legs trembling and my chest heavy. I can't wait any longer, but I guess I can't do anything, until she texts me back.
Half an hour as passed and I'm laying on my bed reading a book and waiting for y/n's response. I start to give up as time is passing and eventually end up sleeping.
"Jungkook wake up!" I hear my brother shouting. I wasn't sleeping, but I was trying to. "Y/n answered you. hurry up!"
With that I sit up and take the phone in my hands and read the message.
Hi Jungkook, I'm pretty good now. What about you? Of course I'd love to meet you. Where would you like to talk?
I can't believe she actually accepted my offer.
Let's meet at the same café. In about an hour. See you later!
I start jumping up and down, but not because of happiness. I'm feeling nervous as hell and I can't stay still for a moment. I feel the adrenaline running from my legs up to my chest, making myself shiver in anxiety.
"I'll go!" I say stuttering a bit.
"Isn't it a bit early?" my brother asks.
"I'm not talking to you" I say looking at nothing.
"Then who are you talking to?" he says confused and looking at me spacing out.
With that question I realize that I was talking to myself, trying to reassure and calm me down. I start walking out of the room putting the phone in my coat's pocket. I run down the stairs stumbling a bit and reaching the entrance door. I take a deep breath and walk outside.
I don't know why but I'm walking as fast as I can, even though I still have a lot of time. As I walk down the street, I keep thinking about a proper speech, but nothing good comes out form my mind. I just keep thinking that she might be really mad at me, for not listening to her that night.
I arrive at the café and wait for her. It's only been twenty minutes since I sent her the last message, so I still have forty minutes to think about what to say. In the mean time I sit at a table and order two glasses of fresh pineapple juice.
Another ten minutes as passed and it's still pretty early, so I decide to play a bit with my phone. As I play the games, I feel a lot more nervous. Maybe I just used my phone as an excuse to not look anxious. And then...
As I hear that voice I turn around and I see y/n standing with a sweet, yet nervous smile.
I'm walking to the café to meet up with Jungkook. I wanted to arrive earlier than agreed. I guess I'm just nervous and don't know what to say once I'll see him. It's actually been a while since we last talked. My parents told me that he visited me at the hospital, but I was asleep.
As I approach the building, I see a familiar figure, sitting down at a table and playing with his phone. I also notice two drinks on the table. I silently walk towards that person and stand still once I'm close enough.
I wait ten long seconds before talking to him. I admire his hair and back and I slightly see him tilting his head, as he loses the game he's playing.
"Can I sit here?" I try to look as comfortable as possible.
I see him turning around and widening his eyes, once his gaze meets mine. He then looks at me up and down, from heat to toe. He seems surprised to see me this early, but I could say the same, as he arrived even earlier than me.
I just wait silently for an answer, but it seems like he's spacing out, looking directly at me.
"Umh?" I hum, trying to make him come back to earth and earning a positive response, as he keeps nodding his head.
It's a bit awkward, I have to admit it. Neither of us is talking, until...
"I've already ordered something fresh to drink. Here" Jungkook says handing me the glass of juice. As I take a sip from it, I can sense his eyes on me.
"So" I say after drinking "It's been a while" I smile sweetly. I actually missed this. Me and him, alone. I still don't want to get straight to the point, I fist want to enjoy some time together.
"You're right" he says smiling and scratching the back of his head.
"Oh, I think fine. What about you?" he asks, looking at me and showing a shy smile.
"I'm feeling better now, thanks" I try to make the situation more comfortable for both of us, by showing my best smile. With that I receive the reaction I wanted, a big big big smile from Jungkook.
"So..." he starts talking, making his beautiful smile shading. But before he could continue talking, I quickly interrupt him:
"Oh did you know I talked with your brother? Both him and Rosé told me that things between him and you got much better" I say nervous. I think, I'm not ready to start talking about me and him.
"Oh yes. We're actually really close now. We talk about everything and go everywhere together. it's the first time in my life, that I've felt this way towards my brother" as he talks, a shy but sweet smile appears on his face. "That's also one of the things I wanted to tell you about. But before there's something else-"
"Oh Rosé also told me that now all of you guys hang out together! That's great!" I say forcing an awkward smile. I try not to look obvious, but I guess it's pretty noticeable how much I want to avoid the main topic of the conversation.
"Y/n...we'll have to talk about it anyways." He says understanding my intentions. "Let's talk about it. the sooner, the better"
At his statement I drop my fake smile and slowly nod, looking at the table.
"Jungwook talked to me" he continues serious. I widen my eyes. What? Did they talk about me? What if they fought for me? Knowing that also Jungwook likes me, is making me a little anxious, even though he told me that he's not the right one for me. But still. Why did they talk?
"He told me about his feelings towards you" he states looking at my hands, which are playing with my long and puffy sleeves. I try not to show a reaction "I know he told you too. When he visited you at the hospital"
"Did he tell you about the visit?" I say concerned. I'm worried that these two really fought.
"Yes and he apologized for everything. He says that he's moving on, but that he can't do it until we both forgive him"
"But...I've already told him how I really feel. Even after all he did, I still don't think of him that way. I mean, I'm not mad anymore"
"That's what I said too." He says looking now at his hands. "So...I guess that the thing with my brother is now solved, right?"
After that, we stay silent and not look at each other. I think we're both preparing for the next topic, which is going to be about him and me. I can feel the pressure and the tense air that is surrounding us. I think almost ten seconds has passed and it looked like it lasted for forever.
"Now..." he says looking at me, almost like asking for my consent. I nod to reassure him, or maybe to reassure myself.
"Y/n. If only I listened to you that night..." he says lowering his head. He's sad, but he's not crying. I want to answer him, that he's wrong and that it's all my fault. But I find myself biting my lips really hard, to contain myself from crying. "I'm really sorry y/n."
No, no... why is he blaming it all on himself? We all know how things really went. Why is he acting like that? I don't want to speak, or else I'll burst out crying and I don't want him to see me like that. But the pain is too much to handle. I'm thinking that if I don't say anything, we'll go at home by ourself, without coming to a conclusion. Or maybe not the conclusion that I'm hoping for.
"Now I know the truth and I feel guilty. Because if I listened to you that night, nothing of this would have happened." He continues, while playing with the glass of juice in front of him. I swear, my stomach is carrying something really heavy and it hurts too much. Also my heart feels like it's about to break at any moment.
"You suffered, mainly because of me. No...only because of me"
"Stop it!" I shout looking at him and letting a tear drop without realizing. He looks at me shocked. His mouth is slightly opened "Stop it Jeon Jungkook! You also know that it's not true!" he stays silent and watches me starting crying "Why are you so selfish? Perhaps you're thinking that blaming it all on yourself, will make me feel better. But it's actually worse!"
He's looking at me with his eyes, which are now shining due to tears. It looks like he's fighting to keep those tears in place and not letting them fall.
"Now we all know how things really went, so please..." I continue "please..." at that moment I start sobbing hard. I can see him finally letting it go and bursting out crying as well "Please Jungkook. Stop all of this. I think I have to apologize to you, for both kissing your brother and dancing with him. I don't know what got into my mind at those moments, but I know I really hurt you"
As I finish my sentence, I see him opening his mouth to complain about something. As I predicted, he's telling me that it was his fault, so I quickly shush him and talk again.
"Jungkook. Can I be honest with you?" I ask and see him nodding, after a bit "I think that all three of us need to apologize. And also, it's all of our fault. There's no one, who's more guilty than the others. We're all the same."
"I agree with that..." he finally speaks rubbing his eyes "I just didn't want to put more pressure on you." And with that we ended the conversation.
"Y/n I need to tell you something" he says, now looking directly into my eyes, more serious then ever.
"Jungkook, we already talked about this. We all apologized so everything is fine now and-"
"I know. It's something else"
I don't know why, but the anxiety that left my body a minute ago, came back, this time stronger.
I freeze on my spot. I still see people around us walking and talking, but it seems like time has stopped. Every second that passes feels like an eternity and I can feel my heart hurting. But it's a pleasant type of pain. We waisted so much time, not talking to each other because of a stupid misunderstanding.
"I love you y/n" he repeats "And there was no moment in which I stopped thinking about you"
I can't say anything. I'm still sitting down clenching my jaw and trying not to cry. But obviously I fail. As he keeps looking into my eyes, I burst out crying and Jungkook just sits there looking at me. Everybody is looking at us and I feel like shit.
Suddenly Jungkook's take some cash out of his pocket and put it under the glasses of juice. Then he takes my hand and drags me out of the café. He doesn't say anything and so do I.
We're walking and I'm covering my face, as I keep crying silently. I honestly don't know where he's taking me; all I know is that my body is carrying a lot of pressure and pain. At some point I feel some stairs and eventually remove my hand from my face, in order to look where I'm stepping.
"Where are we going?" I say, but he doesn't answer. He just keeps dragging me, without turning back to me. After a couple of seconds, I realize where we are. The subway.
Still holding my hand, he buys two tickets and then drags me again, towards the rails.
After ten silent minutes, we got on and sat next to each other. I think he's out of his mind, but at the same time I trust him. I have to say something, I need to get this thing off of my chest, or else it'll keep hurting like hell.
"Not now" he stops me "Not here..."
And with that we stayed quiet, him looking straight on and me looking at the ground. Now I'm calm and pacific, but fore some reason that scene comes back to my mind. 'I love you' those words. As I keep remembering them, I feel a tear dropping on my knees and after that a thumb on my face, cleaning my slightly smudged make-up.
"Please, wait a bit more" Jungkook says looking into my eyes.
Now we got of the subway and we start going up the stairs. I have to cover my eyes due to the strong sunlight, which is making me blind. But then I can see clearly where we are.
At the beach. The same one of that night. As I stop walking, remembering everything about that day, I see Jungkook turning to face me.
"Let's go" he says grabbing my hand and guiding me towards the cool sea. As we walk, I can feel his hand tightening the grip and rubbing his thumb on mine, making me calm down a bit. He knows how nervous I am right now, and I think, it also shows.
When we were close enough, we stopped. Him still holding my hand and giving me his back.
When he turns to me, I feel my heart skipping a beat.
"Jungkook..." I say at a low voice. He doesn't answer and just starts at me, so I'll just keep going with my speech "Let's start from the beginning. I want to do things right this time, without any mistake. So please...forget about our first date and the things that happened that day" I really want to start over again and remove all the bad memories.
"Sorry, but I can't forget it" he answers coldly.
My hearts breaks and hopes drop.
I think that he still wants my apologies and that he can't take those memories off of his mind. Why did I even ask him? I lower my head and the guiltiness hits me again.
"Y/n" he continues "I can't forget about that day. The pain that I felt and the tears that I cried...and our first kiss"
I quickly look up to him, ready to say something, but he smashes his lips on mine, catching me off guard. As I realize what's happening, I give in into the kiss and feel a tear running down my cheek. I ask for entrance with my tongue and after meeting his, I start to feel my body lighter. It feels like all the pain and anxiety have gone and I've finally found peace.
Our tongues are moving in sync, exploring each other mouth, and our lips crashing into each other, has we move our head to the rhythm of the slow, yet passionate kiss. I feel his hands slowly making their way to my lower back and grabbing my shirt tight in his fists. As he loses up the grip on my clothes, I feel his hands pushing me forward, making my body touch with his.
I put my hands around his neck and get us closer to each other, squishing our bodies even more, still kissing passionately. I can feel every muscle of him on my torso and also I feel him lifting his right thigh in between both of my legs.
I feel him smiling through the kiss and, as we keep going, I slowly move my hands from the back of his neck, to his chest. I slightly press my right hand on his left pectoral, feeling his fast heartbeat, like i did last time. And his heart is beating even faster than that day.
As we deepen the kiss, I start to remember every single moment I spent with Jungkook.
From that day, when I protected him from those bullies. Where everything started.
To every single sweet moments we had. And when we almost kissed inside his room.
Also at Jimin's birthday party. When we talked alone and again almost kissed on that big and comfortable sofa.
His face during our facetime on THAT day. All the emotions I felt, while preparing for the date.
Him showing up at my house and asking my parents for permission to take me out.
Our hands together and my confusion when we arrived at the subway.
Also my happiness when we ran and laughed at the beach right after. The romantic dinner at that restaurant and the flying soap bubbles.
Then, the kiss. I can still feel every movement we made with our lips and, somehow, re-enacting now, as we keep making out at the sound of the sea waves.
All I can remember, are only positive things.
We keep kissing as the wind hits weakly our faces and bodies. Both of our hands are fighting to explore our bodies and I can sense our figures getting even closer to each other, making both of us feel the other's body warmth.
After being satisfied with kiss, I feel him pulling away and looking at me into the eyes. I feel my face lighting up, as he speaks to me:
