Bollocks Cycling Infrastructure @bollocksinfra-blog - Tumblr Blog

Huh?

In Bushey, the designers of this path have helpfully allowed your young child to recreate Vyvyan's "Do Not Lean Out Of The Window" moment, should they attempt to see what's ahead. Of course, you'll need bars narrow enough to get through, otherwise no early 1980s hilarity for you.

(via Twitter / PedroStephano: @beztweets a ...)

#obstructive #gate

This looks like a common-or-garden obstructive and pointless gate, until you notice that the National Cycle Network actually goes to the right of the fence (and thence, it would appear, straight into another fence). Bring a machete.

(via Twitter / steinsky: I assume I had some sarcastic ...)

#wtf #ncn

A continuation of the previous path, where the designer has attempted to repeat the "just draw round it" tactic, but here the nearest pole, the electronics box and the bin all proved too much of a challenge.

#london #obstruction

This cycle lane designer has neatly avoided the common problem of locating a pole in a cycle lane, by basically drawing around the poles. This creates a fun slalom effect, sure to enhance any ride.

#london

This is an insidious piece of bollocks which, on the face of it is simply pointless, but is actually quite dangerous.

What this says is that whilst going round a corner, bikes should be in the gutter so as to leave space for cars. Unfortunately this is exactly what should not happen.

Turns - even those that don't cross other lanes - are hazards, and people on bikes need space. There may be additional unseen hazards (puddles, glass, drain covers, people about to step off the pavement); either rider or driver may misjudge their speed or the tightness of the turn and suddenly require a little extra space; on some corners a gutter-hugging position can make a rider less visible... these things and more mean that when turning (whether left or right) it is totally inappropriate for any vehicle to be passing a cyclist. For the infrastructure to imply the opposite is to send a message to all road users that is deeply harmful to the safety of the more vulnerable.

#painted lane #misguided #on a serious note

A new addition to the array of bollocks on our streets, this is brought to you by the bollocksmongers of Bolton. Note how there was absolutely no available space in which to locate this cycle lane, other than across the entire pavement: the expanse of tarmac you see there is the absolute minimum required for cars and lorries, whilst pedestrians and cyclists will be well-served by being kettled into the edge of the space.

#bolton #kettling #shared path

Here someone has chosen to "go Dutch" by arranging the lanes in the continental fashion.

#petersfield

Someone who designs infrastructure is very friendly with a bloke who makes galvanized steel fencing.

#wtf #pointless #coventry

Unicyclists? Ok, you're fine. Bicyclists? Well, if you fancy your chances. Tricyclists? Fuck off. Recumbents? Trailers? Tagalongs? Handcycles? Fuck off, all of you. Go on, get to fuckery. Find another way to cross the river, losers! You're not coming this way, because… er… because… er… just fuck off!

#wtf #obstructive #salford

Sometimes the simplest solution is the best way to really fuck up your job.

#wtf #road to nowhere #east dulwich

"You'll look sweet, upon the seat, of a bicycle made for - oh, fuck's sake…"

#gate #obstructive #kinmel bay #ncn #ncn5

A true all-time classic. Someone found a tiny box, ticked it with a massive pen clutched in his Neanderthal fist, and buggered off down the pub smugly grinning his stupid arse off.

#chesterfield #wtf #pointless

Allegedly, Britain's shortest cycle lane. Everyone involved in creating this was presumably "just obeying orders".

#shortest cycle lane #wtf #pointless

There was simply no space for these two things to be placed apart. No space at all.

#obstruction

Second rule of cycle lanes: Give way to nothing. Actual nothing.

#give way to everything

Remember: technically you may not cross a solid white line. Still, a lovely destination for a picnic.

#road to nowhere

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