From the MaleChastityLifestyle website,
Nine times out of ten, or maybe 99 times out of 100, it is the man who brings up the idea of male chastity and his fantasy of being denied.
The womanâs reaction will varyâŠ. from complete disgustâŠ. to obvious disinterestâŠ. maybe mild curiosityâŠ. all the way to emphatic embracement.
No wonder it can be nerve wracking for a guy to broach the subject of male
chastity to his partner.
Her reaction will make or break his day!
Keep in mind that he would not have brought it up if it wasnât important to him, so itâs a good idea for the woman to keep her wits (if she possibly can!) and carefully consider her initial reaction.
The smart approach is to calm down, collect her feelings and then suggest a time for a lengthy sit-down discussion.
A short âon-the-spotâ superficial little chat will not do the subject of male chastity proper justice!
Scheduling the discussion for later will buy her some time to not only reflect on his desires, but allow some time to do some preliminary research into male chastity, so she has a better idea as to what sheâs dealing with.
During the sit-down discussion, itâs best to let him do most of the talking while she encourages him to bare his deepest and darkest secrets.
Listening and asking questions will give her some valuable insights into what is actually going on here.
Her final question to him should beâŠ.
She should listen to his answer very carefully as it will help her out later.
No, not rest and relaxation. If youâre a woman that chooses to embrace a male chastity lifestyle, there will be plenty of opportunity for that later on.
R&R in this case stands for âresearchâ and âreflectionâ.
This 2nd step to living a male chastity lifestyle is all about the woman doing her due diligence, rolling up her sexy silk sleeves, and doing some research as to what makes her man âtickâ.
The more she can get inside his head and find out what he really wants and
needs, the better this lifestyle will work for both them.
A little investigation into the mind of the man who craves being put into a chastity device and denied will reveal something very important to the woman.
She needs to realize that if she doesnât have a mean streak in her now, it will serve her (and him) well to allow the cruel side of herself to blossom.
In order to deal with all of the bullshit that will soon be coming forth from him, it will be mandatory for her to be (at times), tough minded, mean and yesâŠ.
âŠ. even somewhat of a bitch.
While her research will enlighten her to all of his male chastity fantasies, she will need to adopt a tough-minded attitude in order to effectively use those
fantasies to her benefit.
Now for the 2nd part of the R&RâŠ. reflection.
Itâs time for her to reflect on his answers to Whatâs in it for MEâŠ
He undoubtedly gave her some excellent ideas as to what she will get out of the tedious task of training him to be locked away in male chastity.
But his ideas are just a start. What about her deepest and darkest desires?
How will she benefit from this arrangement?
She should take some serious time to reflect on this as it will come in handy
soon.
Now weâre getting to the fun partâŠ. where she gets to make up the rules.
OkayâŠ. Youâve had your sit-down with each other.
Sheâs finished with her research assignment.
Now itâs time to make up the rules as to how youâre going to play the male chastity game.
Although heâs got plenty of ideas of his own for ârulesâ as to how he would like all of this to play out, in order for a male chastity lifestyle to work seamlessly over the long termâŠ.
âŠ. there can really only be one rule-makerâŠÂ HER
Itâs just the best way to make this male chastity thing work.
In coming up with a set of rules, she will of course take into consideration his male chastity fantasies that he revealed to her during their initial discussion.
She will also factor in the information she uncovered during the research phase.
The reflection time she spent on sorting out her fantasies and desires will also play a major part in making up an appropriate set of rules.
But the first rule of male chastity and the most important is this oneâŠ.
Every subsequent rule made by her is to be followed explicitly and directly by him with absolutely no questions asked or allowedâŠ
If he canât deal with this over-riding theme of Female Supremacy, FemDom, FLR, D/s, Female Keyholder or whatever you prefer to call it, then she simply refuses to be involved any further and expects no further mention by him of male chastity.
Itâs imperative that she holds all of the cards for this game to work.
There can be absolutely no exceptions, wiggle room, backsliding, second-guessing or topping from the bottom.
This one rule firmly and succinctly sets the tone and direction for a fulfilling, fun and exciting male chastity experience.
From then on, she makes as many or as few rules as she wants. She can add, delete, change or modify any rule, anytime at her whimâŠ. with no prior notice.
If sheâs in a benevolent mood, she can even entertain suggestions from him as to the nature of the rules.
This predominant position puts her in a place of prodigious power.
And this level of power will pay off in big benefits.
Time For Lockdown ModeâŠ
There are many factors you should consider when looking to buy a male chastity device.
» Type: chastity cage or belt?
» Material: plastic, leather or metal?
» Security: used with a piercing or without
» Custom made to order or off the shelf?
» Price?
» Manufacturer: reliable customer support
Letâs go over these considerations, one-by-one.
If this will be your first chastity device, itâs best to stick with a cage type. Chastity belts are very secure and look sexy but they do have their drawbacks.
They are usually custom made so will take longer to receive, plus they are on the expensive side. A chastity belt can also be harder to hide under certain types of clothing.
As far as material, leather looks sexy but is not very secure (it can be cut easily) and is not particularly hygienic.
Metal is definitely sexy looking and usually quite secure. But devices made from metal are obviously heavier, harder to get used to, and pose a problem with airport security.
Plastic is the way to go when first starting out.
Most chastity cages, whether made from metal or plastic are pretty damn secure! Although there are men who can finagle their way out of them, my experience has been that when properly fitted, they wonât be coming off without a key.
For added security, many modern chastity devices can be used with or without a penis piercing.
Custom made chastity cages are typically of the belt variety or made from metal. Like I mentioned above, they are usually expensive and can take quite a while to receive. Also, initial measurements are critical to achieve a good fit.
Off the shelf chastity devices come with different sizes of rings and spacers that will ensure a good fit. It is usually necessary to experiment with different combinations of spacers and rings to come up with a comfortable fitting device.
As far as price goes, an off the shelf, plastic chastity cage such as the very popular CB-6000, while not cheap, is well within the budget of most.
You can find cheaper, Chinese knock-offs on Amazon but the quality is not to be trustedâŠ. they crack and break a lot.
On the other hand, custom chastity devices can get quite expensive and are best left for when your chastity lifestyle has been allowed to season a bit.
Male chastity is becoming more popular all the time which brings more designers and manufactures into the arena with new and innovative products.
These manufacturers can come and go like the wind so itâs always wise to pick a chastity device made by  a company who has been around for awhile in case you need customer support or replacement parts and accessories.
There is a reason devices like the CB-6000 are so popular.
Itâs affordable, secure, comfortable and hygienic!
Unfortunately, itâs not as simple as ordering a male chastity device, locking him up and embarking on a fun and exciting male chastity lifestyle.
There is a critical process that must be carefully navigated before the mayhem can begin.
This is what youâve been waiting for? Your male chastity device has arrived
and you cannot wait to get started.
Break him inâŠ. Slowly but surely
Whoa boy (or girl). Take a deep breath, relax and read what I have to say on this matter.
Before wildly embarking on this male chastity adventure itâs necessary for an
adjustment periodâŠ.
âŠ. a physical and emotional one. He needs to be slowly but surely, âbroken inâ.
First, take a little time and make sure you get a good fit, not too tight, not too loose, but just right.
Once thatâs done, lock him up for 24 straight hours.
After a day, youâll both have a good idea as to how things are fitting down there. A little initial discomfort along with some minor pinching is to be expected.
No big deal, at least not for the keyholder anyway.
Any major discomfort can now be dealt with at this time. A larger ring, a different sized spacer, shaving the genitals, applying lotion.
Now go for another 24 hours. If everything is hunky-dory (aside from the minor chafing, pinching, etc.) then itâs time to go for 72 continuous hours (Yes, 3 full days) in lock-down mode.
He will now be getting used to and/or moving beyond any minor discomfort.
He will soon find it more practical to sit down on the toilet and pee like a girl.
He will get used to the feeling of not being able to touch his dick.
He will begin to experience a yearning feeling deep inside his balls (as well as his mind) that comes with sexual denial.
The next phase is to remove the chastity cage, re-shave, re-lube, re-adjust rings and spacers and lock him back up for seven straight days!
This is the phase where any final physical adaptations will take place and more importantly, where the psychological process begins.
This is where the fantasy begins to morph into reality.
He now will be getting what he asked for and begins the transformation from a macho man to a compliant and devoted husband or boyfriend.
Seven continuous days of no whining, complaining or cumming marks the point when your relationship is ready to take on a new level of meaning.
Itâs now time to make a very big decision!
Now that heâs adapted, both physically and mentally, to being locked up for seven straight days, heâs proven that he can âhandleâ things.
In order to set the proper âtoneâ of how the relationship is to eventually evolve, a mandatory (and lengthy) lock-up and denial period will have to be agreed upon and then strictly enforced.
This âconditioning phaseâ is necessary so that both partners are fully committed to the idea that male chastity is no longer just a fantasy or a mere game, but a lifestyle decision to be taken seriously.
This âlock-downâ phase should be anywhere from a month (bare minimum), to a full year. Three months seems to be the âsweet spotâ for most couples.
This may sound like âharshâ treatment but is absolutely necessary in order to instill the proper mindset in the male.
This lengthy stretch of total denial will also empower her to be tough-minded during some tough times.
She will also use this time to thoroughly train him to sexually please her without the use of his now caged-up cock.
He will become adept at transmuting his feelings of frustration and denial into the satisfaction of providing for her needs and desires.
During this training period, itâs wise to tease him un-mercifully in conjunction with verbal humiliation and an occasional whipping session, if sheâs into that.
Nothing can approach the emotional intensity of her being licked to orgasm-after-orgasm by a locked-up and denied male right after heâs being worked over with a riding crop.
At the end of the âconditioning phaseâ, she will have elevated herself to a position of complete control and power while he will have learned to happily (for the most part) take on the role of a subservient sexual slave.
At the end of this period of lock-down and denial, his input into matters will no longer be necessary.
She may ask for his thoughts, but itâs now all about her! She makes all the
rules and he simply answers, âyes Dearâ.
His âCumming Outâ Party
He is now perfectly primed and positioned for his first release in quite some time.
Itâs been soooo long since heâs experienced an orgasm. Perhaps maybe a wet dream, but that doesnât really count now, does it?
A firm benchmark has now been established within the relationship.
Heâs proven (with her help) that he can endure a long period of sexual denial, all the while attending to her ever escalating sexual desires.
Denying a man while you are free to experience sexual ecstasy is an incredible turn-on and power rush for a womanâŠ
She, on the other hand, has become capable of maintaining a disdainful demeanor to his âpredicamentâ all the while providing him with the necessary âguidanceâ (which can sometimes be cruel and humiliating) without flinching.
But now that he has âpaid his penanceâ and she had become sufficiently empowered, it is time for her to decide on how his future orgasms will be âmanagedâ.
The first area to consider is how often he should be allowed to cum.
Most women opt for a set time intervalâŠ. but it should never be more often than every two weeks!
Once per month is better. In my experience, once every two to three months is optimal.
Some keyholderâs choose to keep their men guessing; orgasms are allowed only at her whim, and he never knows when that might be.
That sounds quite cruel but some women get off on the look on a maleâs face when she leads him to believe that the time is near, only to change her mind at the very last minute.
This tactic is suitable for women who prefer to emotionally âbreakâ a man down and render him as a mere shell of his former self.
For most women, this is âover-the-topâ and they prefer to let their man hold onto a portion of his self-dignity so that he can still function effectively out in the ârealâ world.
And then there are women who prefer performance based or âearnedâ orgasms.
An ejaculation can be conditional upon completing chores, performing tasks, maintaining proper behavior standards, losing weight, hers-to-his orgasm ratios (100:1), chastity games, etc.
One important thing to remember; the time between orgasms can always be extended because of âbadâ behavior on his part.
Once the woman has established a fair frequency for his orgasms, she must then decide on how he will be achieving these rare ejaculations.
This is where things get incredibly fun but quite spicy and dicey.
We now know the whenâŠ. What about the how?
Now itâs time to consider how he will be cumming. This is the fun part, especially for her.
After going through the âconditioning phaseâ he has had plenty of time away from regular intercourse. If she has a penchant for penetrative sex, a dildo or a strap-on (for him) solves that issue.
She may decide that his days of fucking are over. No big deal for her since she has the options above at her disposal.
Many women choose to deny the male the privilege of traditional intercourse as a matter of principle.
It is quite common for a woman holding the key to insist that any of his orgasms are of the humiliating variety.
I have a friend who handcuffs her husbandâs hands behind his back and then just tells him to go for it.
He inevitably winds up humping the hardwood floor in the kitchen, then meekly licks up his mess afterwards.
Iâve heard of one woman who has her man hump one of her girlfriendâs legs while she hurls degrading insults his way.
Other women are particularly amused by, and have become masters of, the ruined orgasm.
One particularly cruel acquaintance of mine insists on performing an emasculating prostrate milking in front of a girlfriend, boyfriend or sometimes both.
Iâve witnessed a pro-domme at a party order a man to polish a pretty girlâs high heeled boot with his cum, followed by his tongue, while she whipped his ass from behind with a riding crop.
My favorite? Instructing him to cum on her ass followed by a thorough tongue
clean up. Ummmm.
It can also be exciting to incorporate some sort of âdiceâ or âspin-the-wheelâ type of game, leaving the matter of âif he gets to cumâ and the manner in which he does it, up to pure chance.
Youâre really only limited by your kinky and perverse imagination.
Now that youâve both settled in and become comfortable with your personalized version of a male  chastity lifestyle, itâs time to reflect on an extremely important matter.
Once everything has been set-up properly within a male chastity lifestyle, everything should now be smooth sailing.
The reality of enforced male chastity typically does not measure up to the fantasy he once had about it.
The fantasy was much more erotic than the stark reality of constant denial and severely limited orgasms.
Now that heâs securely locked up, with no release on the horizon, second thoughts on this course of events begin to haunt him.
But itâs a completely different story for her!
The reality of male chastity for the woman is much more powerful and fulfilling than the initial fantasy ever was.
At first, it was about his fantasy. Now itâs all about her reality.
Now that she holds the key to his manhood and has the situation well under control, she canât understand why she was ever hesitant to begin this in the first place.
Sure, she has had to initially expend some major time, energy and effort with all of the rule setting, conditioning, attention to detail, discipline and compliance issues. To be honest, this is no small feat and is not for a weak willed woman!
But she will have emerged from the back-end of this process with superior self-confidence and complete sexual liberation.
He, on the other hand, has relinquished his ability to orgasm, something so importantly powerful that he canât help but wonder if he has made the right choice.
He will, at some point, inevitably began to start âmissingâ his frequent orgasms, the ones he had become so addicted to for most of his adult life.
If she acquiesces to this inherent weakness that resides within most all males, the lifestyle that they have expended so much effort to build, will began to fold like a cheap lawn chair.
When the subject rears itâs ugly head, she will need to firmly put her high heeled foot down and say no!
There can be no going back. She is living the perfect, pampered life that she deserves while he, for maybe the first time in his life, has found some real peace, even though itâs of the frustrating variety.
If he continues to complain and have regrets about his situation (the one, by the way, he so desperately lobbied for) she has several options, including but not limited toâŠ.
» institute a policy of permanent orgasm denial » increase his chore/work load by 50%
» a severe cock caning or whipping session
» make an appointment to have his penis pierced
» discontinuance of all male chastity activities
» threaten to leave the relationship
Any unreasonable demands on his part should be firmly countered with strict
and swift consequences.
Itâs really only matter of time when she will need to draw a bold line in the sand and not put up with any questioning of her authority.
Consider this to be an honest and fair representation of possible âfall-outâ issues when embarking on a male chastity lifestyle.
Male Chastity is not for every coupleâŠ
To successfully incorporate it within a relationship, both partners will need to have the courage to move beyond traditional sexual and romantic roles that are played out by most couples.
Social conditioning, as it pertains to relationships, is powerful stuff and can lead to feelings of guilt, fear and inadequacy where none should ever exist.
Both men and women instinctively know who they are at a âgutâ level. Being in tune with that inner knowledge and living your life exactly how you want, results in true happiness and freedom.
If youâre a guy who is sick and tired of being in control all of the time, then maybe itâs time to let go.
If you truly adore a woman and enjoy treating her like a Princess, elevating her pleasure above yours, then go for it.
If youâre a woman who would like to see how it feels to âturn the tablesâ and be the one who wields the power in a relationship, why not give male chastity a try.
Freeing yourself from all household duties (or just the ones you dislike) while experiencing exquisite sexual ecstasy, precisely the way you want it, when you want it, cannot be adequately expressed in words.
A man that can provide all of that for her, and then some, will evoke emotions that will reverberate all the way down to his inner core.
Training a male to accept his new life of being denied is a fun, frustrating (at times), and extremely rewarding endeavor. You will need to get a chastity device early on in the training process.
Thanks to malechastitylifestyle
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