Fellas, it’s Tumblr Trivia Time!
Y’know, this freakin sucks guys.
Today’s National Start Over Day and I wanna write a long-ass post about either Ray trauma or Daisy trauma, but I only have so much writing-juice in the ol’ brainsicle and I need to save as much as I can for the “FF of FF” video script!
So, it sucks, but I gotta keep this short.
For today’s Tumblr Trivia Time, we’re asking…
“Which of the Freaks has the most trauma?”
I’ll admit: I feel…kinda weird ranking which of my guys and gals are the most traumatized…but also, uh, it might be fun in a messed up way so here we go!
We’ll be going from least to most traumatized so, starting us off, we have Craig. Dude was just born. He hasn’t lived life yet. He’s fine…aside from that one time Freddie held him over a match and gave him, the baby, a strong case of pyrophobia, but, I mean, compared to the rest of this shit, that’s pretty tame!
Then, there’s Pauly. Yeah, his town was kinda sorta under attack by the KKK when he was a kid, but they dealt with them…for a while. And, I mean, his dad did die in WWI, and that really sucked, but Pauly’s been able to heal from that. Of course, then there’s the way he was “contracted” by the Fristolbaums and that was…kinda rough…maybe left a few scars, but he’s fine! He’s totally fine!
And, this is where shit gets tricky. It’s pretty close, but I think the next one’s Lester. Like, first: orphan…so…there’s that. But also, the orphanage he was left at was run by a “mad scientist” and a bunch of insane nuns. Honestly, Grey’s Home for Boys was kinda like an inverse psych ward. Then, y’know, after Lest’s aneleemania showed up, he basically became Dr. Grey’s lab rat. Then, he was the first Freak to be “contracted” by the Fristolbaums and he had to deal with them, alone, for two whole years until Pauly showed up. All before age 11 btw.
Coming in third is Rosie. Her father couldn’t have given less of a shit about her and her mother just actively hated her. She did have her family’s servants and they were nice, pretty much raising her…but then the Fristolbaums showed up and took her away on the night of her Bat Mitzvah, with her parents basically selling her to Frederick. And then…I…I don’t wanna talk about what happened after that. For now, I’ll say…fuck the Fristolbaums. Absolute evil pieces of shit.
Moving on from…that, taking the silver medal, it’s Ray! I mean, Ray’s first goddamn memory is of him and his family losing nearly everything in the 1917 Guatemala earthquakes. They then traveled, on foot, through Mexico, which was currently going through a violent Revolution, for nine months! Then, after they set up shop in Laredo, they had to be super careful because, if you came from across the border, the Texas Rangers were looking for a reason to kill you. And all that shit happened before the Long Laredo Night! By the time Ray and his family set foot in Laredo, he’d just turned four! How tf is he in second?!
Daisy easily takes number one. It really wasn’t even a debate. Not only can none of us ever understand to have every single piece of human knowledge up until 1937 in your head, but how all that knowledge got put there…it was awful. There’s a really good reason why Daisy doesn’t talk about it. Once upon a time, she was a simple farm dog. Her only job was to herd sheep and be a good girl. And then, in an instant, that all went away…and all the nightmares began.
Tomorrow’s National Yo-yo Day, so that’ll be fun!
Tune in tomorrow for more Tumblr Trivia Time!