I've taken a break from writing this blog as i thought maybe my opinions should be kept to myself and/or maybe these post are too self-indulgent. This could be true but I had a fan tell me a little while back that she appreciated these musings. It got me thinking that at very least I can be sharing my experiences. Both good and bad, about art and the music business.
Well, my experiences as of late have been both incredibly rewarding and incredibly challenging.
One common word that I have heard the most in 2014/2015 is the word NO.
This is the one word that artists may hear the most in their career
…until it turns into YES. (cue rainbows and sunshine)
How does one navigate these waters?
For me, you must never take it personally.
This will save you.
If you have done the best work you can and know it, there is no need for self preservation.
You can take that NO, file it away and move on.
NBD! Seriously!!!
But having that reaction takes time to learn.
In my early twenties, I spent so much time speaking negatively about why people weren't getting it, why didn’t I get the gig, or why I wasn't further along, etc.
All of that comparing and negative hypothesizing is toxic and comes from insecurity.
Who wasn't insecure at 23? I dare you to raise your hand!
If you are finding that these NO's are getting you down, look inward and look at your work. What’s inside of you is causing this reaction. Do you know you didn't give it 100%? Did you compromise?
Also, ask yourself honestly. What could I have done better? (This is the money, right here)
If I was to take all the NO's that I'm hearing from labels that are passing on my new record, I could bury myself in self doubt BUT I know I've done something right and never compromised along the way.
In learning how to hear the word NO I've also learned how to say it.
This has become equally as important in my path as of late.
There comes a point where you HAVE to say NO.
Saying NO to the gig that isn't going to pay enough or on a bigger scale,
making changes on a record, or in the band because it isn't working the way
you know it should and could.
Those last two can become quite complicated as one usually has personal relationships with the people they are working with.
Let's face it though, you need to put forth the best possible product both on record and on stage, right? Isn't that what all of us are going for?
Loyalty is important but don't be loyal to a fault.
At the end of the day it's YOUR record with YOUR name on it.
I've had to make some difficult calls this year. Last minute album changes, band lineup changes. They have been tough but I've learned an extreme amount and have come out on the other end empowered and even more clear about the vision and what I want to present. I've trusted my gut along the way 100% and it has yet to fail me.
If someone is going to take offense or take personally a professional call you have made, then you probably shouldn't have been working with them in the first place. But how were you to know, right?
There may be a list forming of who's calling you an "asshole" behind your back but don't be worried.
If you are saying NO in a professional manner with no ill will but with grace and straight forwardness based on the quality of the art it's pretty hard for someone to fault you on that.
But along the way in making these calls, have some trusted mentors to consult with and if they have advice, hear it.
One thing is true, we can't navigate these waters alone.
Surround yourself with inspiring and experienced people. Let them do the talking. Hear their war stories and learn from them.
