Xuebing Du
Claire Keane
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Love Begins

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Not today Justin

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@brokn-soulll
“I miss you”
I hate realizing that this is it. this is life. I only get one chance and I’m spending it crying over food, hurting myself and unable to get out of bed some days.
My day everyday
i don't argue anymore i just say "ok"
i am addicted addicted addicted addicted to anything that distracts me. i cannot deal with my own thoughts, memories, emotions. i dont want to think about myself or my life or anything at all related to me.
When I say “I hate my body” I don’t mean “oh I’m a little insecure about my belly” or “I could lose a few pounds” I mean I have physically repulsed by it. It’s horrifying and upsetting to see. I wanna crawl out of my skin.
i want girls to question their sexuality over me and boys to fear me and animals to love me
manifesting 🕯
toxic mothers are wild they'll really be like "I never said that" like ma'am yes you did cause it's been ingrained in my head since I was twelve
I don’t want to get older
i’m terrified
I'm strongly starting to believe that life isn't meant for me.
not to be dramatic but being yelled at makes me suicidal
my boyfriend is abusive but i don’t want to leave bc it’s exciting
i can feel myself getting manic and i’m kinda excited cause i finally have the freedom to have fun instead of sitting in my room so riled up i hit my head against the wall just to feel something
I’m back, just incase for some reason you noticed i was gone. I was gone because i had a boyfriend and i was genuinely happy. Turns out i have terrible taste in men because he’s in jail now. We broke up and i can feel the happiness leaving my body, like i can physically feel myself getting sad again. I really convinced myself this was gonna last, im not sure why because everyone was telling me it wasn’t going to. I can feel myself becoming numb. Time is starting to move slow again and its getting harder to smile and talk and i just feel nothing. Overwhelming nothingness, no thoughts, no feelings, just blank.