Bruh.

This page is an absolute free for all at this point

[bruhnam299]

Kappa and Siren are Wilmon coded. No, I will not be expanding on this further, thank you for listening.

[bruhnam299]

Speaking on behalf of probably all Young Royals viewers, somebody please take a wrecking ball to that Music Room 😃

[bruhnam299]

[Bodyguard AU]

Suguru: is there any particular reason why you’re groping me in public?

Satoru: I take my job very seriously, Sir.

Suguru: and this is part of your job, how exactly.

Satoru: I must protect all of the client’s ASS-ets and en-TIDDIES.

Nanami (hidden behind a bush with the sole purpose of doxing Gojo when he harasses Suguru): that’s it. you’re done.

[bruhnam299]

Satoru: Did I not give you enough love?

Suguru: Not enough to make me want to stay in this world.

[bruhnam299]

[In group therapy]

Therapist: This is a safe space. Go ahead and share your thoughts.

Itadori: Gojo Sensei and Geto-san were screwing like rabbits on Nanamin’s desk.

Gojo:

Geto:

Therapist:

Nanami:

Nanami: You both have three seconds to run.

[bruhnam299]

Suguru, trying to make Satoru jealous: Well, I’m wearing a tight, revealing outfit to the party tonight!

Satoru: Wear what you want. I can fight.

[bruhnam299]

Suguru: You bought a taco?

Satoru: Yes.

Suguru: From the truck that just hit Nanami-Kun?

Satoru: Well, me starving isn’t going to help him.

[bruhnam299]

(Got this idea from an original tiktok prompt)

Satosugu prompt:

Satoru is a hockey player and Suguru is a cheerleader on the football team. Suguru comes to watch one of his boyfriend’s games, when the kiss cam points to him and another guy that’s been making moves on him all night (could be an OC from the football team??). Suguru panics and freezes but then hears a loud commotion. Turns out, Satoru stops mid skate to slam into the glass and tell the other guy to “get the Fuck off his boyfriend”.

SOMEONE PLEASE WRITE THIS AND TAG ME

*screams into the void for possessive!Satoru*

[bruhnam299]

[At the club]

Shoko: Sup. Where’s your boyfriend?

Satoru: Suguru went to get us drinks.

Shoko: Oh my gosh, I think someone’s hitting on him!

Satoru: Um, duh? How else is he supposed to get us free drinks.

[bruhnam299]

Satoru: I have a date tonight.

Suguru, scoffs: Well, good for you.

Satoru: No, good for us. I’ll pick you up at 6 pm.

[bruhnam299]

Satoru: *playing with Suguru’s hair*

Suguru: Stop it. You’re ruining my reputation.

Satoru: Then get off of my lap.

Suguru: No.

[bruhnam299]

Satoru, *on the phone*: Well fine! I guess that means you don’t love me anymore! *hangs up*

Satoru, scoffs: And everyone says I’m the unreasonable one in our relationship.

Nanami, absolutely exhausted: You just used our only call to ask Getou-sama for a blowjob instead of asking him to bail us out.

[bruhnam299]

[High School Era]

Suguru, slamming open Satoru’s door at 2 am: I need your help glitterbombing Gakuganji’s wardrobe because he’s a bitch.

Satoru: That’s a weird way to ask me to let you have my babies, but okay.

[bruhnam299]

Satoru, *waking up from a surgery*, jokingly: Wow, do my eyes deceive me? Are you an angel?

Suguru: Wrong. I’m a demon, and you’re in Hell. Welcome.

Satoru:

Suguru: The surgery killed you by the way.

Satoru:

Suguru: You’re dead.

Satoru: Yeah thanks, I got that.

[bruhnam299]

Gojo: Sometimes I wish there was more to life than surviving, ya know?

Shoko: Like what, dying?

Geto, a recovering serial killer: Killing.

Gojo: Living. I was going to say living.

[bruhnam299]

Gojo: I need you.

Getou: For?

Gojo: Ever.

[bruhnam299]

Gojo: look, I know you think my judgement is a little clouded because I like Suguru.

Shoko, holding up Gojo’s notepad: you doodled your wedding invitation on here.

Gojo: no, you got it all wrong.

Gojo: that’s our joint tombstone.

Shoko: my mistake.