Summary: You ran from Lucien when the bond snapped into place. It's been torture being without him.
Request: Could you do Reader x Lucien, where reader is his mate not Elain? I can never really find any and he's my favorite. Thanks for your time
TW// angst in the beginning, brief mentions of difficulty eating, feeling rejected, kissing with consent, super fluff at the end, mating bond.
A/N: always happy to write for Lucien! I agree that there aren't many mate!reader x Lucien fics, so I hope this fills a little bit of that need. Sorry if it's short, I hope it meets your expectations! This is unedited, unproofread, and Tumblr was being a bitch when I was writing it! Happy Easter, Happy Passover, Ramadan Mubarak, and if you don't celebrate any of those, then have a wonderful day <3
Lucien Vanserra is many things.
Tall, muscular, witty, gorgeous, former emissary of the Spring Court, friend to the Night Court, the youngest of the seven brothers.
And okay, it snapped into place so suddenly, so unexpectedly, you really couldn't be blamed for reacting the way you did. There was an incredibly attractive high fae male in the townhouse kitchen, it's a wonder you didn't turn and run away the moment you set eyes on him. No, you waited until after the bond snapped in place, that strange draw towards each other making both his and your eyes go wide. You didn't know how to react, didn't know what to do. And when your mate spent just a few seconds too long staring at you like you were a bug that learned how to speak, you bolted upstairs.
Feyre followed, her footsteps not enough to drown out the disbelief in the low rumble of his voice. "She's my mate."
You had heard about Lucien before that encounter, and afterwards Feyre assured you he was a good male, but you were nervous. You'd never had a mate before, and it felt weirdly like an arranged marriage to you. Even if you had nothing against him, or the mating bond, they both terrified you. This worsened when a month passed with no contact between the two of you. You weren't sure what his reasons were for refusing to seek you out, but yours kept you indignantly silent.
You could feel the bond. Lucien was mostly quiet on the other side, but you could feel him. From the moment he left the townhouse your chest grew into a black hole, sucking up anything and leaving you hollow inside. You felt like you were dying, like a sickness had taken over you. Though you continued with your normal life, everything was more difficult with the presence of an absent mate. Even eating, sleeping, everything was harder. You wondered if he could feel you too, if it was consuming him alive the way it was to you. Occasionally, an emotion would spike down the bond, like it had unintentionally slipped from the leash of his control. Fear, anger, sadness. They made your heart beat faster and your mind race whenever they flashed. A few times it happened at night, forcing you to pace the room all night, any thought of sleep gone like dust on a breeze.
And somehow, even though you hadn't said a word to him, even though nothing had changed in the month you hadn't seen him, you began to feel something resembling love. Lucien was constantly present with you, even if he wasn't there physically. He was constantly on your mind. As much as it all terrified you– the longer you were apart, the more desperate you became for him.
It was halfway into month two when Rhys decided to intervene. Every member of the Inner Circle was worried about you, about your deteriorating condition. That space between the day that Rhys said he was going to invite Lucien, and the day that Lucien confirmed he would come... You thought you were going to die in those three days. And when he finally decided to come, the date and time he chose were almost immediate.
"This will be good for both of you." Feyre assured, sitting on the couch beside you.
Your stomach clenched nervously at the mere mention of Lucien. She hadn't even said his name and your mind inflamed with thoughts of him.
"What happens if he rejects it?" You said, your mouth dry. Then realizing the insecurity you just voiced, you added. "If I reject it?"
"Then we'll deal with that. Just give him a chance, talk it out." Feyre said, and you knew she was probably speaking from experience.
Her head whipped up to Rhys and they exchanged a silent conversation. Lucien had arrived. You could tell, if not from their faces then from the bond that alerted you to his nearness. You pushed your hands beneath your thighs, sitting on them to keep from jumping up and running to meet him. You were desperate for him but you couldn't reveal that until you knew he felt anything for you.
Lucien entered, and it was like time stopped. His eyes immediately met yours, and the face that had been burned into your memory was infinitely more beautiful when stood in front of you. His eyes roved over you, fixed as if you were the only person in the room. Your legs trembled to keep from jumping into his arms. You didn't even know if he wanted you, and yet you wanted nothing more than to be with him, close to him. Whatever this bond was, whatever the Cauldron had destined for you could be damned. It didn't matter if it was fate, or just primal instinct, but you loved him. A male you didn't even know.
"I guess we'll leave you two alone. If you need anything, give a shout." Rhys mused, leading Feyre out of the room with a hand on her back. You had forgotten they were even there.
You couldn't think of anything except him. His tanned skin, the brightness of his hair, you wanted to run your hands over all of it.
"Y/N." Lucien finally said. Everything inside you guttered out at the sound of your name on his lips. The others must've told him about you, you distractedly realize.
"Lucien." It's the breath of a whisper over your tongue. His name is so much more beautiful when you say it to his face. The sound of it seems to siphon some of the life out of him, his eyebrows pulling up barely perceptibly.
Lucien clears his throat and refocuses himself. You can tell this is more difficult than he expected it would be, yet ever the trained socialite, he schools himself into focus. He's still on the other side of the room, but he take a few steps closer, his scent wafting. Like honey, and wood and grass. You almost arch towards it. He notices.
"I suppose there are some things we need to discuss." His voice sounds like he isn't completely present. His head is in a world somewhere else.
You nod, a harsh snap to reality when you remember he might be here to reject you.
"You ran away from me." He was closer now, making his way to the couch but scared to be in such proximity to you.
"I was scared." You whisper honestly, as if under a trance. You don't know how Rhys resisted the bond for so long, how he kept it a secret. "I'm sorry." You apologize, knowing it must've felt awful to have someone actually run in the opposite direction after realizing they're to spend their life with you.
"Scared of me?" He freezes, not moving any closer. You pat the cushion next to you, knowing he wouldn't move any closer if he thought you feared him. Lucien sits down, his compliance a small comfort.
"No. No, definitely not of you." You shake your head adamantly. "The bond– it surprised is me is all."
He looks down at his hands, turning them over in his lap. It gives you a chance to study his features, the scars, the intricacy of the metal eye. Everything about him is so sharp, so starkly beautiful. A beautiful male deserving of a beautiful mate.
"You didn't seek me out." You ask.
"I didn't think you wanted me." It was as if you could hear your heart shattering over his words. He glanced up and the genuine empathy in your eyes urged him to continue. "I was scared too." Lucien admitted.
"Not of me," You hoped, joking.
He scoffs a light laugh. "No." The amusement lowers from his features as he answers honestly. "I was scared of what happens to people close to me. I was scared that maybe if there was some way you wanted me, I would end up losing you before I even got to have you."
You didn't know what to say. You didn't know how to comfort him, assure him you would be fine. Those words would be meaningless to a male who could see through such pleasant lies. There was nothing you could say to make him want you, nothing you could say to convince him that a life together would be worth it.
"You don't want me." You concluded.
His head whipped up, brows narrowed together, his eye whirred. "No, I didn't say that." You give him a pointed look to explain. "I want you more than anything I've ever wanted. I've never felt this way before."
You reach over and place a hand over his warm, tanned ones. His nostrils flare and he looks down at it, studying where you skin meets his. It's the first time you've touched your mate.
"Tell me what you're thinking, Y/N." He sounded broken and you never wanted him to be like that again. It destroyed you.
"I'm thinking that I don't know how this is possible. I don't even know you and you're the only thing I think about. I couldn't eat or sleep for the past month because I've been so consumed by how much I need you."
His eyes were beautiful up close. His scent was torturing you, and fighting to keep from kissing him was the hardest thing you'd ever done. His skin was like a magnet to yours, begging to be touched, begging to worshipped.
"Tell me, whatever it is you want I'll give it you. If you tell me to leave and never come back, you'll never see me again. Whatever you want, Y/N." Lucien promised and the passion in his voice had you dragging your hand up to his forearm. He was addictive and sensual, your eyes drooped half-lidded and you whispered with every ounce of you.
"Kiss me, Lucien. Please."
It took him only a moment before his lips were on yours, a warm hand cupping your jaw. Your hand found his knee, and the other traced up his broad chest. It was sparks and fireworks from his lips, but also fuzz and static so loud in your head you couldn't hear. He was glorious. His lips were plush, devouring yours like he needed you to breath. The suffering that came from separation was nothing compared to the euphoria of joining with him. If everything in your life had led to this moment, it would've been worth it a million times over. Lucien's hand scraped up your scalp and you gasped against him, the touch so much more magnified coming from your mate. Your palm against his chest arched to scratch down it, a shuddering breath releasing from the male. You had the same effect on him. He pulled back, the only sound both of your panting against each other. His scent was so intoxicating, so strong up close you had to keep from burying your face in his neck. You were halfway climbing into his lap as it was.
"My mate." Lucien whispered, his eyes studying the emotions whirling in yours. You nearly crumbled beneath his words.
"You smell good." You whispered, a smile breaking across your features when he pulls back and laughs. Happiness on Lucien was your new favorite thing in the world.
"So do you." His smile is so beautiful it makes your heart swell. Looking at him feels like looking at the sun. "You know what they say about mates?"
"They say a lot of things about mates." You countered, unable to even attempt to hide your beaming smile.
"It's been said that your mate is the only one who can truly see your soul, unhindered. It's why we're so protective over them, why we fall in love so quickly." Lucien's eyes flicked to your lips when he said 'love'.
"What do you think of my soul, Lucien?" You were almost teasing, though curious to hear his answer. You couldn't tear your gaze from him.
"I think it's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." And the way he looked at you, you could tell he wasn't just talking about your soul when he said it. You pressed your lips to his in short affection, unable to resist him for any longer.
"So..." You trailed, mischief sparkling in your eyes that made Lucien draw back, suspicious. "You want some soup?"
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